Why Are 21st Century Men So Apathetic and Unmotivated? | Girls Chase

Why Are 21st Century Men So Apathetic and Unmotivated?

Chase Amante

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what motivates a man
Men of today have lost their motivation to build, fight, work, or get women. What's behind their lethargy, and how can you overcome this in yourself?

We live in a distinctly unmotivated time.

During the settling of the American continent, European settlers burst through with boundless energy. They founded towns, warred with the natives, pushed into hostile and unfamiliar lands, and carved paths through a frontier in search of unknown fortunes.

In the American West, frontier towns brimmed with ambitious men who eschewed the comforts of civilized life, like fine clothes, fine food, or women -- some towns at some points had male-female ratios as stark as 754-to-1. Before the Gold Rush of 1849, California's population was 90% male.

Yet, this bothered the men little, for they were there to find wealth, greatness, or just to build or find something new.

Men of this age didn't need help with women. They found wives readily enough (when they returned to civilization -- or imported them from back home), and those wives didn't divorce them (and only infrequently ran off with other men).

Men of this age didn't lose themselves into aimless pastimes, comfort, and luxury the way men of later ages did either. Most led hard lives, with simple food, simple living, hard work, and simple pleasures.

Yet travel 150 years into the future, and their inheritors are an opposite picture.

American men today sit about all day, riding around in automobiles, their faces glued to screens, their testosterone levels crashed (17% down just from 1987 to 2004 alone), over 50% of the American population non-working (population: 329,227,746 citizens + ~12,000,000+ legal and illegal aliens; jobs: 137,802,000; total U.S. employment: <40.4%). Compare that to the Pioneer Age, when women and children worked all day (on the farm, on the ranch, at the market, making textiles, or in various other occupations)! Many Americans are disinterested in the work available (I have seen numerous men in trades talk about offering jobs or apprenticeships to unemployed younger men and having those younger men turn them down), while many have little thought to the future (1 in 6 older people plan to spend all their children's inheritance).

This apathy extends to all kinds of things, and is on the rise. When I got into the seduction space, most guys weren't that interested in pickup because they occasionally got laid or found girlfriends from their social circles (and that was enough for them).

Today, even fewer men are interested in seduction, yet for different reasons. Rather than it being because they got laid in other ways, a lot of men aren't having sex at all, and are completely apathetic about doing anything to change that situation.

young men no sex
The percentage of men not having sex is shooting skyward.

There's less interest in pickup.

young men no sex
Interest in getting women is down to about 40% of what it was when I founded Girls Chase.

There's less interest in nightlife.

young men no sex
It's been worsening yearly. As of a few years ago, each month only 334 bars opened while 609 bars closed (source).

Men are dating in their social circles much less, and every man is on Tinder, where most women aren't.

what motivates a man
Tinder: the ultimate sausage fest. Worse than any nightclub! Source: Statista

More and more men aren't working, more and more men aren't getting laid, more and more men aren't doing anything other than to sit around with their time, watching their jobs disappear, their women walk by, and their histories vanish, and instead of doing anything to change any of that, more and more men just hang around, observe, and complain.

What's happened to men in the 21st Century, and how did they become so dull?

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his One Date System.



PougDolk's picture

I will try to unplug myself.

James D's picture

Wake up call

Mr.Rob's picture


stefqqqwwweee's picture

chase this is a link to a book i think you would enjoy reading, you may even be interested in incorporating some insights from praxeology (the formal logic of human action) into seduction
Man, Economy, and State is Murray Rothbard's main work in economic theory. It appeared in 1962, when Murray was only 36 years old. In it Murray develops the entire body of economic theory, in a step by step fashion, beginning with incontestable axioms and proceeding to the most intricate problems of business cycle theory and fundamental breakthroughs in monopoly theory. And along the way he presents a blistering refutation of all variants of mathematical economics. The book has in the meantime become a modern classic and ranks with Mises's Human Action as one of the two towering achievements of the Austrian School of economics. In Power and Market, Murray analyzed the economic consequences of any conceivable form of government interference in markets. The Scholars Edition brings both books together to form a magnificent whole. —Hans-Hermann Hoppe

Zanardi's picture

Your article came exactly in a period when I am thinking about this, not as deep as you wrote here. Long story short, I had noticed that my willingness to try new things got me to the place where I have many useless things in my life (so I have to guide this willingness in other ways) and that I am not crazy in trying to climb Le Mont Blanc.

Confused GC Reader's picture

Really confused by recent articles concerning the GC stance on dating apps.

Alek says dating apps are a waste of time and not efficient enough.
Varoon says always to have a sufficient dating app profile to alleviate scarcity.
Chase says delete all dating apps outright.

I know that all GC writers have their different styles of game, and that works well to teach others, but this topic seems especially complicated and divisive...

Jack's picture

This is just unbelievable. I'm sure many men have these hunches, feelings, but are unable to articulate them. You did it perfectly. Bravo. One of the absolute best articles on this site.

Rowe's picture

Awesome work as usual but I do think your perspective would become more nuanced if you read some high-quality leftist social analysts like Michael Parenti and Michael Hudson. The BLM protests have definitely been redirected and co-opted by the establishment, but the grassroots energy is real and the cause is valid: from redlining to racially motivated war on drugs (as admitted by Nixon’s campaign manager), black people are still screwed over by our political-economic system long after the Civil Rights movement (and have suffered disproportionately from the pandemic). Beyond racial issues, Full time minimum wage workers can’t afford rent in any US state according to a recent study by the National Low Income Housing Coalition, while the corrupt covid bailout has funneled hundreds of billions to the top as millions of Americans become unemployed, so I think mass social unrest was inevitable. But while I think many of our issues are rooted in our economic system, I think you bring a very valid issue forward and as always appreciate your work

Eli G's picture

I dont think men dont have the drive to have sex; its just that womens standards are too high and most men dont make the cut. Most men are trying and failing to get laid, others have given up, and a small percentage is getting almost everything. We have to be realistic and acknowledge that most men are going to be average no matter what. The problem is that women have too many options and society allows them to go for the top men.

Mark H's picture

This is an incredible article, Chase. Your writing continues to be so thought-provoking after all these years. Here are my 2 cents on the answer to the titular question. I am an apathetic and unmotivated guy myself.
-Men are eschewing work because, people feel like, whether they work or not, they are still going to be ****ing poor. Statistically, I seem to be in the top 0-10 percentile of earners in the country and yet I'm still poor in the grand scheme of things. So given the comforts described in your article, why guys are dropping out.
-Getting laid is more difficult than ever and guys are just giving up. Where I live, night game is not a thing anymore (even before covid), and dating apps are just as you described. The only viable thing is street approach but that is not thought of very highly and is very time consuming. Guys here go years of daygaming here with less than a handful of dates to show for it. So guys give up there too.
-In parallel with the above two, men give up on having a family or any kind of "mission" and become generally dispassionate.

militarybrat51's picture

I have always lived a very simple life it comes from being raised by a career military father. The only creature comfort I won't live without is my hybrid bed. The chair I sit in hard bottom high back for posture. My job commercial/Industrial electrician yep I wire the buildings most work in. Those in the corporate world look down their nose at me. I often wonder why do they not know the toilet flushes,the lights come on, their is recepticals power their devices because of men like me. I am a simple very well educated man a real man who's plug in time is very limited.


Tired being a loser's picture

Hi Man,

That article came in time it is something tha tbothered me for ages...

I have 2 certificates from Finland (Envionrmental ENgineering and Master in Biology(Water specificially lakes, rivers etc...) I got my masters quite young at age 28, I dedicated so much time into certificates just to realize later in life that emplyers tend to reject me, directy or indirectly.

I want to be my own boss but the only skills I got are almost useless and I have very little experince, I hate being this nice guy who is living in his comfort zone but I have many traumas including a car accident. The car accident and been beaten by Nazi Skkin heads made me scared of fighting as I dont want my head to be banged too much(TBIs) and shit....I have no idea how to be the bad boy.

I saved some money, very little and I always ask myself should I leave Finland and go to South America or Africa but I can t do anything there, I only know ENvironmental Engineering, I dont have a trade and I am tired of studying, if I learn trafe in FInland that means I have to stay many years here....I want and wish to get out for a whilte atleast and learn something that I can do but I cant....I have no idea what to do it really sucks.

I am learning some programming but it is slow, and even though the basics are clear doing projects are very challenging, I wish I can master this skill....I love ENgineering and I wish I new it when I was 23 or 25, so I can take more courses etc....

I tired of being ghosted by women, tired of walking beside the wall, tired of not being able to break laws, tired of being a weak man.

Unicorn's picture

I think the biggest evil is refrigerator.. and Amazon.
But I also think you are romatising past times a bit. And it's kinda not modern men's fault that all lands have been discovered and conquered before them. Now it's all about discovering financial lands but it's not for everyone. I do agree it's an apathetic times. But maybe it's just natural. There's nothing to do/discover so people do nothing. Maybe that's how population stops growing. I don't really think you can change the process. Sure few individuals may try but it's not as simple as will power. There're some forces that control those changes in society. They happen naturally

Pete's picture

Crap title. If men are not motivated at anything nowadays the world population will just fall off the charts and the human race will be extinct soon. There will be no new startups revolutionising various industries and we won't be looking to venture further into outer space. But hey, all of this are still happening aren't they? Quit talking like u have been in this world for centuries Chase.

Ben's picture

Interestingly, population growth actually does slow and disappear as countries become more 'advanced' economically.

Japan for example has a birthrate below 2, left to their own devices they might actually just die off eventually.

Europe and the US are both around the rate of replacement for birthrates. If the trends were to continue, they would go extinct.

3rd world countries are far less comfortable, and don't seem to be in any danger of extinction though lack of reproduction.

You seem to miss the idea of individual variation - motivated individuals existing in group X does not contradict the claim that members of group X (2020 USA for example) are less likely to be motivated than members of group Y (1800 USA for example).

Jay Cee's picture

Damn Chase didn’t know you were a philosopher. And here I thought this site was about chasing poon.

An important message about personal responsibility. Critics would say something about toxic masculinity but it’s really about taking ownership of one’s lifestyle without needing to conform. As Arnold said: “Break the rules, not the law”.

If you do what everyone else does, you’re going to have average results. How has that worked out given the situation we’re in?

Sco tt's picture

Chase, thx for taking the time to document your personal evolution because it repeatedly skirts the edges of SPECIAL, and I’ll knee anyone in the balls who disagrees. Back in my day, facing the horrifying, impending decade of the 1980s, I decided to hide it out in Alaska. I bought an old motorcycle and drove North in early April, me being a dumbass, not knowing it was still winter. I shoved a Sunday Seattle Times up my coat for wind insulation and made it to Anchorage, possessing this very thing you discuss: Discomfort. Shortly thereafter, I met a 17 year old hippie girl who introduced me to LSD, which we took in the mountains without her boyfriend because he wouldn’t fit on the motorcycle (poor lad). Thus a great momentum was born, and out of this, this girl and I eventually married, doomed to failure, of course, but worth 17 good years. My next Love in life was squatting in an old abandoned farmhouse in Tennessee where the floors were rotted into dirt, daughter of a philosophy professor, and she was fucking hot as hell. Next chick, five years later, likewise pure magic, but I began to notice serious glitches in my long term game. It was my son who introduced me to your work, such as your beautiful pontifications and various shocking insights, including the realization that I’d been offered very few worthy male role models (on television) including Gilligan, the skipper, the professor, and Mr. Thurston Howell III. Now the chicks my age today are generally ill and suffering from low level depression and I have recently done mushrooms with a 23 year old vegetarian hottie and again with a 35 year old progressive, while the relational complexities are daunting. I am preferring to be alone, than to compromise on anything, while channeling my mojo energies into other rewarding pursuits including recent studies into the Silva Mind Control Method to STOP and heal (reprogram) a few past societal programmings and to envision a better future. I conclude that there is no time, my friend, just one big fucked up Glorious thing, nor can you and I conceive of MEN one or two or three thousand years ago. Thx for being a valuable part of living and breathing it, today’s things, cockroaches, etc., sharing this wonderful planet we call home. God damn it we are getting somewhere, I do believe!

Ralph Garweyl's picture

100% agreeing with you chase and I love the comparison with how systems have worked historically and still do in general.

Nevertheless, one thing still bothers me.

Since 2-3 years, I literally practice every single point on your unplug list. And I still often feel like I'm not really unplugging and being imprisoned in a system. Why is that?

Of course you can unplug from your social circle, from your government and from your job. But can you unplug from the constructs that steer peoples' behavior worldwide? Can you unplug from tho global economic system that enforces you nearly everywhere to have a perfect cv? Can you unplug from the religion of the god of money that is dominating the beliefs of humans worldwide? Can you unplug from the affiliation to a specific nation without getting suffocated with bureaucracy, restrictions and duties?

Maybe there still exist places like this but they're inevitably going extinct. You can't really unplug from systems that dominate peoples' heads all over the world, except you'd settle on the moon.

Richard K's picture

Good article! I think 2 major factors, that you didn't mention, are radical feminism, and the war against boys and masculinity. Feminism started in the 60s but by the 80s had become radical. The war against boys and masculinity started in the 90s. Men were forced to go along with these weird re-definitions of "manliness" or they were guilty of "toxic masculinity". The radical feminists bitched and moaned loudly enough that men fell for their re-definitions and lies. Manhood and masculinity have been torn down. So, this current generation of young men is like a rudderless ship during a storm. They've no way to get out of the storm and back on course.

haael's picture

Maybe I sound a bit MGTOW, but the real issue is that there's nothing to win.

Guys in last centuries could find a new island, found new country, build a house, start a family. We don't have any of it today.

T's picture

do you really think there is nothing to win? Perhaps you won't find a new island, leave alone a new country but you can build a house or start a family. These goals you mentioned presuppose the passion, the persistance and patience to reach them. In former times men who went out to find new countries or island always knew that it could be their last journey and for a lot of them it was (Magellan, Cook etc).
Read the comment of Scott above. It is fantastic. He took a decision and went for it. I dont think that he ever discussed with a women explained or worse excused for his goal. He did it and the suitable girl came into his live. And that's my experience as well. But it hasnt always to be a live changing decision.
I am a passionate archer and I once had a talk with a really attractive woman, intelligent and eloquent. When she asked me what my hobbies are
I said: Archery
and she: How boring.
I smiled at her and said: Aha.....
Then I asked her two questions about her job and then I asked her: Where did you practice archery?
And she: Oh no I never did that.
Me with a smile: And where do you know that archery is boring?
I let this sink for 2 or 3 seconds and asked her what her hobbies were, why she did it etc... and I didn't mention Archery any more until the point where she -about half an hour later- suddenly said:
Can you show me how to shoot a bow? Upps......
Well, it isnt important whether she wanted really learn Archery or to see me again (yes we did....) the thing here is
that I didnt explain, excused, defended or whatever because it simply wasn't important what she thought.
And again go your way not because of frustration that women aren't the way you want to have them but because it is your passion and if a woman wants to take part in your life welcome her and if not let her go. Its simple as that and called outcome independence.


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