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Social Skills

A New Take on Mystery’s Group Theory for Meeting Girls in Groups

new take on mystery's group theory
Group Theory came to the seduction world via the Mystery Method. Here I challenge some of its underlying mechanisms and give my own take on picking up girls in groups.

Guys learning pickup and seduction often find that pulling a girl from a group can be a bit challenging. How do you take a girl home with you if she’s out with a group of people? How do you handle her friends?

These are crucial questions that need to be asked if you want to become a master of the social and seductive arts.

If you are into meeting girls in bars, clubs, or social gatherings, this post is a must read for you.

In the pickup world, this is usually referred to as “group theory” and has been discussed from the early days of pickup and seduction. It’s interesting that the theory of the early days (coined by the famous seducer Mystery) has remained largely undebated. I haven’t seen it discussed much or even criticized. It has been the “meta” since then (there have been some disagreements but they are minor compared to many other themes).

However, I do not fully agree with classic group theory. I will get into why that is. That said, there is truth in it, and it does work very well in some situations. I will also discuss that.

We will also talk about alternative theories and strategies.

Who is this post meant for? In my opinion, everyone! If you are new to this vast world, then this goes under what we at Girls Chase would label as fundamentals (things you must know and have control over before getting into the fancier stuff). Therefore, this post is a must read. It will not be too hard to pull off in real life, although there may be some heavy theorizing. Honestly, it does not matter if you don’t remember all the theory if you grasp the essence of this post and manage to apply the techniques properly.

If you are an experienced reader, then you probably know by now what I think of recaps. There is no such thing as too much recapping of fundamentals.

And maybe you will learn a few things.

Note: we will not be discussing mixed groups in this article because it would require its own post, particularly on how to deal with male competition. Let me know in the comments if this is of interest to you.

Hand Gestures That Make You More Attractive to Girls

hand gestures for talking to women
Your hands are always speaking, even from your pockets, so you may as well take them out and put ‘em to good use. Because they can say some pretty great things about you!

In a previous article, we discussed glamorous traits that any seducer can learn and adopt to boost his odds of creating a strong first impression with the women he meets. Now, anyone who’s been a part of the seduction community for a while, or a regular reader here at Girls Chase will know how important first impressions are for dating success.

A powerful first impression will make you memorable enough to stick in her mind – so she’ll want to respond to your ice-breaker text and solidify your chance of meeting up with her again for a date. A good first impression can also leverage the excitement generated by your initial impact on her to grow into a deep emotional and physical connection with you. It will enable the two of you to move at breakneck speeds, propelling you toward burning passion and sexual intimacy later that evening.

To put it simply, first impressions open various doors in seduction – and specific doors you want to open.

In the previous article where we dissected the concept of glamour, I briefly touched on the captivating power of hand gestures. In this article, we’ll be following up on this aspect of glamour. Let’s take a closer look at how you can use your hands to take your first impressions, emotional connections, and of course, your ability to captivate her to a completely new level of persuasive power.

More Tools to Help Conquer Your Fear of Approaching Women

fear of approaching women
If you want to get laid, approach lots of girls. Sounds simple, but what if approaching women terrifies you? These tools will help you conquer your fears.

Approach anxiety is the #1 problem every guy thinks he has.

I say “thinks he has” because once you get over your irrational fear of striking up conversations with attractive women, a whole world of dating possibilities bloom. But you can’t even seed that journey if you’re too afraid to approach.

#2 is knowing “what to say” to girls.

The two are connected.

You don’t approach because you don’t know what to say – you don’t know what to say because you don’t approach. It’s a paradox with a very simple and logical solution.

How to Be Funny: 15 Secrets the Best Comedians Use

how to be funny
Want to learn humor that makes you friends and gets you laid? You’ve come to the right place. Here’s a crass and thoroughly offensive lowdown on how to be funny.

Whew, lad. This is going to be fun.

Me talking about comedy is usually a dangerous topic because I have very poor filters. I have zero limits on what I’m willing to discuss.

When I started to write this article, I was going to stray from super contemporary topics, but I couldn’t resist. It just wouldn’t feel right if I didn’t address some current ideas, and I’d feel like I was no longer being neutral, but outright cowardly.

However, I’m also not a culture warrior. I will briefly discuss culture, but in a detached way. MY philosophical/political leanings are pretty clear if you read my articles, but that doesn’t matter here. I’m simply going to discuss humor.

If you don’t agree with me on what’s funny and feel like getting testy in the comments, then attack my ideas about humor, not my choice of humor.

If you come across this article and are itching to find something to offend you, there will be plenty of that in the clips chosen and the topics covered.

I’m here to teach you the structure of how to be funny, and that will require me to use examples of what I find funny.

I’ll be scholastic with this article, but if I have to make some long apology or explanation to every demographic that might get butthurt at my words, it would be dreadfully boring, and you’d want to kill yourself before you finished the article. (See? Suicide joke. Strap on your panties, there’s more to come.)

You have been warned. All offense or outrage that you may experience by scrolling down is your responsibility and your responsibility alone.

Now, to the good stuff.

Frame Control Methods to Get Women in Bed Fast

frame control methods
In this series of posts about frame control, we’ve learned what good frames are and why they work. Now let’s talk about the methods you can use to set frames.

Hey, guys! Welcome back.

In previous weeks, we have discussed what frames are, why they are important, and what constitutes a good frame versus a bad frame.

Here are those posts if you haven’t checked them out yet:

Hopefully, with those posts you’re now familiar with:

  • What frames are
  • Their importance not only in seduction but in every social setting
  • What defines good frames
  • How you can make your framing more powerful
  • How you can better control the frame

But after all this theory, I have not given contextual examples, which is exactly what I will do in this post. We will discuss different ways in which a frame is set. This will give you an idea of what framing looks like in real life.

Even though we will not go into heavy details of how each technique is used, rest assured that each has been addressed on Girls Chase (and there will always be more to come). This post serves as an overview and starting point. Maybe you will discover new ways to set your favorite frames.

Of course, the list I am about to share is not complete, but I would say that it covers the most common methods of setting frames. My point is – there are more ways. We will distinguish between a few here:

  • Verbal and non-verbal
  • Direct and indirect
  • Active and passive

You can set frames both verbally and non-verbally. For example, you can tell a story or talk about a subject that would help set a frame. However, note that frames can also be set verbally as a response to her actions. That is often a good place to work from, or you can work with what you have in that moment. We will get more into that, do not worry.

You can set the frame non-verbally as well through escalation and eye contact.

You can set a frame passively – through action or passive behavior that dictates the vibe. For example, when you build social proof, you will automatically frame yourself as a man with options who is pursued by women – a very attractive frame. But you are not directly setting a frame; it comes as a result of the context you have created.

Anyway – no more dwelling, let’s get to the meat.

I will first discuss direct ways (active) to set a frame before moving on to how to do it passively. Finally, we will discuss how to set a frame reactively.

How Frame Control Affects Your Entire Interactions with Girls

frame control and interactions with girls
In this follow-up article on frame control, we discuss – from a macro perspective – how the frames you set affect your whole interaction with a girl.

Hey, guys. Welcome back. If you read my previous article on frames (which you should, as frames and frame control are some of the most important concepts in seduction), you understand how pickup, dating, and seduction are not FULLY sequential processes.

Now, they are sequential to some extent – as you do open first, then hook, before eventually isolating, seducing, extracting, and having sex.

But it is clear that:

  • How well you open will have an impact on how easily you hook

  • How well you hook will define how easily you can isolate, build rapport, seduce, and most importantly, SET FRAMES

And here is the MOST KEY ITEM:

  • How well you set the frames will DEFINE EVERYTHING that follows, including how much compliance you will have, what you can and can’t get away with, how easily it will be to extract, how easy or hard it will be to escalate, how much resistance you will face, if any, and so on.

So, frames are important, as you can see. But what is also interesting is how pickup, seduction, and dating is a semi-sequential process. Yes, there are sequences to follow, but each sequence sets the pace, tone, and overall vibe of the upcoming steps. This is exactly what FRAMING does!

But you already know this if you read my previous post. If not, then you better check it out, as most articles on Girls Chase will make more sense after you do.

This post is a continuation. Now, if you know everything about framing, you may skip my previous post, but recaps never hurt.

In this post we will discuss the effects of frames on interactions – we will explain how setting frames affects the whole interaction – taking a macro perspective. What are good frames vs. bad frames and what roles do they play?

Next week we will move on to take a micro perspective and discuss how frames are set in the different sequences of an interaction. Let’s get on with it.

Why Frame Control Is the Most Important Tool in Seduction

frame control most important seduction tool
Frame control makes the difference between becoming her lover or getting stuck in her friend zone. If you want sex with the women you meet, this information is vital.

Hey, guys. Today I want to discuss how frame control can impact the entirety of your interactions with women, especially in terms of seduction and sleeping with the women you meet – rather than becoming just friends.

I will get a bit deeper into what effects frames have on how you interact and why it is key to set the right frames early. Failing to do so can make it very difficult to reach your goals with a girl, no matter what they are.

Many guys see seduction and pickup as a linear process – i.e., a set of techniques or steps that follow each other. To some extent, this is true – if you look at pickup from a micro perspective. But you cannot leave out the big picture – how each step of the process affects the others; or more importantly, how previous steps affect future steps.

This is so critical. It is exactly what most guys tend to forget about. Everything builds on previous steps. This post aims to explain how these mechanisms work so that you can gain a better understanding of your game and perhaps, in turn, better it.

To give you some examples of what I am talking about, consider the following:

  • Guy cannot get out of the friend zone – despite his efforts in applying the latest and most powerful pickup tech, he is still stuck there.

  • Guy meets girl, she laughs, touches him, but he totally fails to escalate – she is just not a sexual girl (so you think). Similarly: Guy has a perfect date – now faces last-minute resistance from hell.

  • Guy displays high social value, but all he gets is “take my Instagram” when interacting with girls.

All these issues can be caused by a failure in setting the right frames – or at least, avoiding setting the wrong ones in the first place. The frame you set when you meet will dictate the interaction and will only be amplified with time throughout the interaction(s). The more the frame is set (good or bad), the harder it is to get out of it.

In the case of the friend zone, the guy is stuck because he has been perceived as a friend because of his previous actions, but more importantly, because of the frames he has set through his presence, actions, and so on. And as times goes on, the frame becomes stronger and harder to get out of.

Many of you are familiar with what a frame is and how it comes into play, but for those of you who are unfamiliar with the concept, I highly advise that you check out the following posts after reading this one.

How to Avoid the Dating Pitfalls of Being a Good-Looking Guy

Avoid the Pitfalls of Being Good Looking
Good-looking men face particular challenges in pickup. How do you compensate when a woman acts weird around you or thinks you’re too cocky or out of her league?

Hey guys! Welcome back.

So, my two previous articles have been focused on debunking the idea that looks are the primary factor in success with women.

I have presented many different arguments for why looks are not that important. I’ve also given examples on how good looks can backfire, referring to the pitfalls and difficulties good-looking guys face.

And I think this was a good subject to cover. It is helpful for not-so-good-looking guys to understand the effects of looks and the place they have in pickup and seduction – and that looks are NOT everything.

The pitfalls good-looking men face is something VERY rarely discussed, and I believe it was a beneficial discussion. Admittedly, however, I have realized that in my last post where I covered the pitfalls and the difficulties good-looking men face, there was more of a pessimistic tone. As a matter of fact, it was far less than optimistic, and at the cost of convincing less-good-looking guys that being is was not always a good thing, I have probably left the good-looking guys feeling bad. The previous posts may in fact have generated negative beliefs about good-looking guys.

The truth is, being good looking has its benefits, but also its pitfalls. And like everything else in pickup, it is all a matter of calibration. If you are good looking, or even more importantly, good looking to her, you must calibrate accordingly.

So, to enjoy these benefits, you will have to know how to play properly, and this is what this post is about. Now, pickup in general is the same for everyone, and you mostly will have to calibrate according to the girl. However, this post can help you adjust your game to who you are.

How to Smooth Talk like a Pro

How to Smooth Talk like a Pro
The gift of gab can be learned, but it involves more than just words. True smooth talkers master a range of elements that culminate in a complete performance.

Smooth talkers have a deep understanding of what makes a great conversation.

A conversation’s “smoothness” is defined by how it handles transitions – how it moves from one topic to another or goes deeper into a particular topic. It is also defined by how the conversation’s errors are handled (e.g., awkward points, miscommunications, etc.).

The fewer “errors” in a conversation, and the better those errors are handled, the more smooth a conversation will feel. But transitions must also lead somewhere – a conversation can be smooth but boring, and that’s not worth much.

Thus there should be good emotions involved. A conversation shouldn’t only be smooth and fun, but also enriching.

You want the other person – or people – to walk away having learned something, felt a great connection with you, and gained more respect for your character.

What’s difficult to teach about conversation, of course, is the details.

“What do I say?”

If you expect me to tell you what to say, you’ll be disappointed. What to talk about depends on the environment, the context, the people. The occasional anecdote can be great if the context is right for it. But going in with pre-fabricated conversations can backfire, because a good conversation is dynamic. Conversations are note speeches.

What matters most is being able to start a conversation, then keep it going no matter where it goes. Context is everything with a conversation. The ability to make the conversation interesting depends on your familiarity with the context, whatever it may be.

There is one secret that I learned to developing good conversational skills, but it is not in and of itself the answer, only a force that propels you. At the end of this article, I will reveal it, but in order to utilize it, you’ve got to know the basics.

So, to start, I will teach you a system to learn how to smooth talk like a pro. If followed properly, people will seek out your company, because they know the value and the positive motions that will follow in the wake of your presence.

Let’s get to it.

9 Ways to Answer “What Do You Do” Without Saying What You Do

Answer 'What Do You Do' Without Saying What You Do
To avoid boring people out when they ask a question like “What do you do?” try answering the question without really answering it.

Learning the nuances of the most basic social norms is something most people don’t give much thought to.

In college, I remember spending a lot of time contemplating how to respond to that weird “Hey, how are you?” exchange that happens when you pass someone you know. Most of the time, they say “Good, how are you?” and don’t even listen as they walk past. Responding with “Good, thanks” is a necessary but useless response.

How do you make those interactions more interesting and less awkward?

I took the time to figure that out, and it helped a lot.

The same goes for the question, “What do you do?”

If you approach a lot of girls – which you should if you want to get dates, sex, and girlfriends – then you’re going to hear “What do you do?” a lot.

It will also come in other forms.

“What do you do for work?”

“What do you do for a living?”

“Where do you work?”

Your answer won’t change much, regardless. As long as you understand the basic root of what they’re asking, answering is simple.

So, what’s going on when someone asks “What do you do?” and how do you respond to it in a way that makes you interesting and cool?

Here are nine ways to do it without giving the typical, boring answer of what you actually do.

First, let’s go over why it’s boring to tell girls what you do – most of the time.