Seduction

If you sleep with her too quick, the odds she sees you again go down. Want to raise them up? Re-seduce her once she's dressed and on her way out before you let her go.

If you do fast pickups, where you're sleeping with women very soon after meeting them, you'll run into a certain issue. It won't be much of an issue until you want to hang onto a woman. Then you have one you decide you'd like to see again, and up it pops.

The issue is that no matter how great a guy you are, when you are shagging women very fast, by default a lot of women may not want to see you again.

A woman may feel guilty about having slept with you so fast: "I'm not like that, I don't know why I had sex with him so quick," and this can make her not want to see you again.

Or maybe she enjoyed it, but she completely writes you off as a random sexy rogue (fuckboy) and has no desire to see you further.

None of this is an issue when a one-night stand is all you're worried about.

But it becomes an issue when you lay a girl you'd like to keep, then can't get her back out again.

However, there is one unique little tactic I've devised over the years that dramatically boosts your ability to convert a fast-lay into a girl who'll come to see you again.

Before I tell you about it, you should understand a few things about how people make decisions, first (and actually, I am going to give you a bonus tactic too... so really it's two tactics here).

Times have changed in regards to sexual liberalism among women. Particularly, anti-slut defense is becoming less prevalent. But should we stop using ASD-busters?

I initially planned to keep up with my COVID-19 related posts. However, I received a fascinating response from a reader about my first article on dating apps (where I share my perspective that I do not like them).

The question was posed by user doncgiovanni:

“Hey,

In this article, you said anti-slut defense is ALMOST a thing of the past. I read a couple of your articles on sex talk and gambits. The crucial part of them always seems to be framing women as not sluts, rather expressing their sexuality.

Do you find this not so necessary anymore? I’m finding more and more girls in alternative circles just owning their “slutness” and not giving a damn... which is great :)

Do you think it’s cool to just skip this part with some girls/most girls? How do you go about it?

By the way, love your articles, contributions to this scene.”

DG

Women often resist sexual approaches so they are not perceived as sluts or “easy” in their peers' and friends’ eyes, and the eyes of potential lovers. And many men dislike “easy women” for various reasons. So a defense mechanism occurs that makes women turn down sexual moves, and act more asexual than they really are. It’s as if they were “hiding” their sexuality.

Society has traditionally controlled and suppressed female sexuality for centuries. To understand why, review my earlier article on anti-slut defense (ASD).

In today’s Western world (this may be different in non-Western countries), women seem looser around sexuality because of cultural changes. Pop music, political discourse, and youth culture all motivate sexual behavior.

Dealing with ASD (removing her barriers about being sexual with a guy) and making her comfortable being sexual with you is a major part of the game. It’s usually done by:

• Reframing sex as natural and not a big deal

• Framing sex as positive rather than something that should be judged negatively

• Framing sexual liberalism as good and healthy

• Framing yourself as a sexual guy who is nonjudgmental

• Pointing out how unfair and detrimental it is to judge women for their sexuality

• Communicating low-keyness

Our reader is asking a good, straightforward question. If ASD is diminishing — if not disappearing from Western female minds — then why still worry about it? Why would I still advocate using ASD-busting techniques, like communicating sexually liberal ideals and low-keyness?

There are multiple reasons.

Do you seek approval? Is your behavior tentative or uncertain… or is it clear to women that you are confident – that you just KNOW what you are and what your value is?

Sometime back, I wrote an article on giving girls oral sex (i.e., cunnilingus).

In it, I gave a tip of maintaining eye contact through the session if you want to ratchet up the intensity.

A reader writing in the comment section commented that his girl "hates it, finds it incredibly feminine." He adds that women in pornography "stare up at the guy while giving him a blow job, seeking approval." Then says that his woman doesn't want that.

It took me a moment to wrap my head around where this guy was coming from at first. Yet, then, I realized where that was.

With almost anything you can do, there are different ways of framing a thing, both internally (in your head) and externally (the way you present it).

In this case, here was me framing a thing one way. Then this reader came along and framed it another way.

This difference in framing gets picked up on by the woman herself.

Sensual habits get women to open up more authentically with you. If you can show you’re a cool guy she can trust with her own sensuality, she'll drop her shields.

Today we’ll discuss seductive habits and how they can help you with women.

A seductive habit is a small action or motion you repeat that gives you flavor for a girl. Much like a raw piece of meat can be made tastier by marinating it in spices, good seductive habits run deep in your behaviors, making your more exciting.

Instead of a woman saying, “Oh, it’s the same-old-same-old, I don’t need it, thanks,” it makes a woman say, “My God! How did you make this taste so good!”

This gambit is designed to shock cultural frames that may be holding a girl back from opening up sexually. Why can’t the ‘normal of there’ be the ‘normal of here’?

For a lot of guys, creating a sexual frame with a girl feels like a real challenge.

The advantages are clear if you have been reading Girls Chase for a while because frame control is the most important tool in seduction. Using your conversation skills to get girls thinking about sex (and having sex with you) will send you racing down the path toward dating success.

You might be wondering how to make sure your frame control tactics get you the results you want and not backfire. Maybe you have asked yourself, “How should I introduce sexual frames in a conversation?” Or, “Which ones should I set first?”

These are very important questions to consider. However, the confusion surrounding these critical questions is precisely what causes the difficulties many guys who want to use this tool face.

By the time you’ve finished reading this article, you will have straightforward answers for each question, and a deeper intuitive understanding of how to use frame control to get fast sex. And if you’ve been looking for opportunities to pick up the pace in your journey to become a skilled seducer, the effective gambit we will be discussing today can help you hit the ground running.

When she looks down, smiles, and brushes her hair back, you've spiked arousal.

During the course of every seduction, at certain points a woman's arousal will spike.

She'll go from "This guy's interesting to talk to" to "Wow, I think I like this guy."

At some other next point she'll then go from "I think I like this guy" to "Ohhhh... I want this guy."

You can see these arousal spikes (they get called 'buying temperature spikes' or 'BT spikes' in the seduction community) fairly obviously much of the time. Women will do things like:

• Droop their eyelids ('bedroom eyes')

• Smile lasciviously at you

• Move much closer to you

• Let out a little moan

• Blush/flush their cheeks

• Flash (suddenly raise) their eyebrows at you

• Begin to touch you on their own

• Let their lips part and mouth hang open a bit

• Tilt their heads at you

(incidentally these are all things you can -- and should! -- do yourself as your seductions progress to create the feeling of greater intimacy and escalation)

When you see a few of these signs, it's a pretty clear indicator you're turning her on.

So what do you do when you see them?

Jump all over them?

Point them out?

Conversations with girls often take bad turns that can derail a seduction. Learning how to redirect bad topics into good ones will help you get things back on track.

This will be a fun one. It’s moderately advanced but not too advanced. This should be fine for intermediate seducers and above.

Let’s discuss smooth talking her like a pro and making the most of your conversation skills.

If you read Girls Chase regularly, you might know that reading conversation examples from articles or seeing gambits are very helpful verbal game guides.

Some examples:

• How to Follow Up with Your Openers and Start a Conversation
• 4 Example Conversations: Friendly, Sexual and 2 More
• 3 Sex Gambits: Good/Bad Sex, Sex is Unfair, and the Dark Side
• EXPLICIT CONTENT! How to Sexualize Conversations with Minimal Resistance

But what you might not know how to do yet is create your own gambits. Or perhaps you’d like to manage your conversations with the same level of finesse as in the verbal game examples in our articles.

This is crucial for a variety of reasons. Creativity requires a deep understanding of the techniques that shape the verbal game examples you see on this site. It lets you figure out other ways to use our dating tactics that are better suited to your personality, should you need to.

Another reason: to manage or even direct a conversation, you must be present in the conversation. Because after all, it is a conversation, not a monologue.

What’s more, using examples you've memorized word for word means your mind will end up in two places at once. And focusing on remembering what you memorized or searching for opportunities to stuff it into the interaction does not help you manage an unfolding conversation effectively.

It often makes it harder to calibrate. So you’ve got to learn how to freestyle, at least a little bit.

Yet how you freestyle — especially if you want to be smooth and calibrate properly — is essential.