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Seduction

Moving from standard attraction to physical and emotional intimacy with a woman of your choice.

Sex Talk Calibration, Pt. 1: Context for Sex Talk

Alek Rolstad's picture
sex talk contextSex talk’s a mighty tool for arousing girls in-field. Nevertheless, get the context wrong and it flops. The context MUST be right for sex talk’s success.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Today and next week, we will discuss transitioning into sex talk. As you know, sex talk helps with many areas:

  • Stimulates her
  • Sets a sexual frame
  • Conveys attractive personality traits like sexual knowledge and experience (sexual prizing)
  • Diffuses resistance with your set
  • Generates sexual comfort
  • Escalates the vibe

The way we talk about sex is to discuss a sexual subject, whether it is a sociological, philosophical, or social-psychological subject linked to sex. It’s not “I want to do this and that to you,” as this would ruin your frame and trigger premature resistance (if not rejections), but instead, we talk about sex as any other interesting subject: you debate and discuss it and share knowledge.

The frame is “this is what I believe, what I know, this is my experience, and it is fascinating. I enjoy discussing this amazing subject with cool people.”

Thus, the overall frame is, “I could make you experience all these things if you are the right girl for me, but I am not saying I necessarily will.” Notice the modality difference between “will/want to do” vs. “may/could do.” For more details, read this post: Sleazy Sex Talk vs. Sexy Sex Talk: What’s the Difference?.

You may also check out this post: Showing Intent Without Showing Your Intentions.

What’s the most challenging aspect with talking about sex? According to my students and me, it is not talking about the topic but getting to where it is comfortable enough to bring up the subject: transitioning into it.

Women find sex topics interesting and stimulating, but it can be tricky to steer the conversation in this direction. Women find discussing sex one of the most intriguing subjects out there.

The problem is that sex talk, even when done correctly, can potentially trigger resistance.

We will discuss resistance to sex talk and how to avoid it through calibration. We’ll cover sex talk calibration, emphasizing transitioning, usually the shakiest phase to maneuver. Once you get comfortable talking about sex, things get much easier, although you may still need some additional focus on calibration.

For those wondering how you transition into sex talk, do not worry. I will share a few words about it and link to posts covering different techniques at the end of this article.

Is She Testing You or Resisting You? Telltale Signs

Alek Rolstad's picture
testing or resistingSometimes girls’ tests can look like resistance. Sometimes their resistance can look like tests. How do you tell the difference? With a few telltale signs.

Hey guys and welcome back.

In this post, I resume my series about women’s testing of men they are or could be interested in. If you read all these posts, you will be prepared to handle most women’s tests in most situations. Of course, some tests are so unique that they require an odd solution, but usually, those tests are rare. The knowledge you gain from this series will help you find a solution to the strangest of tests.

Many men tend to confuse when a woman is testing and when she is resisting. Today I will clarify the differences between the two. The quick response to this concern is that it is a non-concern. It doesn’t matter what her motive is. What matters is what she expresses and how you respond. What she is doing or why she is doing it is irrelevant. If she is afraid of the slut label, tackle the issue head-on. If she is concerned about going home with strangers, address that issue. It does not matter if her resistance truly is resistance or a test—your response matters.

Although less likely, tests are camouflaged as resistance. If she is challenging your congruency because she is resisting, tackle it head-on as a test of congruency—even if she is doing so to resist.

For those more advanced who want to delve deeper into the subject, read on.

First, a quick reminder:

  1. Testing is a way for a woman to test or steal your frame. By stealing your frame, she is indirectly testing it. If she grabs your frame, it means your frame is weak.

  1. Resistance expresses a concern. She is worried about certain acts potentially leading to feeling negative emotions, pregnancy, risk of violence, or social shaming. Her concern remains valid until that concern is gone—your job is to handle her fears so they vanish, eliminating her resistance.

Theoretically, this distinction seems clear-cut. But practically, it’s a bit blurry.

Let’s go over why this confusion exists by explaining how resistance can sometimes be a test and vice versa before we learn what you can do about it.

How to Get Same-Day Lays: Tips, Tricks, & Advice

Chase Amante's picture
how to get a same-day laySame-day lays are exciting, fun, and enviable. It may not always seem simple to get them though. With these eight tactics, they come much more in-reach.

It’s something of a Holy Grail for day gamers: bedding a girl the same day you meet. (this is a bit more common in night game! Actually it’s a lot… at least for most guys)

There are a lot of girls out there who are open to this though.

It’s not a majority of them, or a plurality of them. But in any city at any given time there is a not-insignificant number of women who for any of a number of reasons would really just like to meet a sexy male charmer who sweeps them off their feet and gives them the experience they need to fall into bed for a satisfying end to a satisfying day.

Of course, that doesn’t mean they will necessarily make it easy for you. They want it to be a good experience for them, too… which means you need to make the right moves to get there.

In this article, we’re going to talk about how to get a same-day lay. I lay out some of the same-day lay tricks, tactics, strategies, and advice I’ve accumulated over the years.

Confrontative Frame Control: When & When Not to Use

Alek Rolstad's picture
confrontative frame controlIt can make sense to directly confront a girl’s frame – sometimes. Yet confront her frame at the wrong times, and all you’ll do is spin your wheels… or worse.

Hey everyone.

Today’s article is a part of my series on frame control and dealing with tests. I’ll continue my discussion of testing, covering two interrelated subjects:

  • What is confrontative frame control? How is it used as a test?

  • When should you use confrontative frame control?

Confrontative frame control directly declines her frame-grab head-on, such as saying, “NO, I will not do that!” or “That is not going to happen” to her request.

You will use aggressive frame control whenever a girl is behaving poorly or trying to test your limits.

No worries, I give examples throughout this post.

If you recall my theoretical post about tests, I mentioned that some women test a guy’s limits to see how much crap he will put up with. A man who accepts bad behavior is usually viewed as a wimp.

Social Proof: A Force for Dramatically Influencing Behavior

Chase Amante's picture
social proof influenceSocial proof – when people see or know someone or something is desired by others – can kick off a frenzy of urgency to meet someone or acquire something. But why?

We’ve talked on Girls Chase quite a bit before on social proof and its daughter concept preselection. If you’re just tuning in, the definition is this:

Social proof is a psychological phenomenon where people feel influenced to do what they observe or believe other people to be doing. The more other people someone sees or believes are doing something, the more compelled the individual feels to do that same thing too.

The most effective product promotions – from the latest Christmas fad toy to new video games and systems to Hollywood blockbuster movies to cryptocurrencies to political candidates to asset bubbles to, now, even vaccines – use the psychology of social proof to whip buyers up into a desperate frenzy to get the desired object that everyone else is clawing to get.

They use benefits-laden marketing, celebrity endorsements, interviews with ordinary people claiming to be desperate to get the product, and real (or engineered) scarcity to get the initial core group of desirous customers crazy for the product. Then they use media and advertising to showcase these desirous customers and spread their desire to others. As others see these customers clawing tooth and nail to get the desired thing, they feel a deep, subconscious pull to also get it, before the others get it first, lest they “miss the boat.” They will often feel this pull regardless whether they initially wanted the item or not.

You have probably witnessed many such product promotions like this. Some of them you may have watched from the sidelines, marveling in awe at the marketing machine behind them, shaking your head in despair at how easily manipulated people can be.

Others, however, you may have desperately plunged into alongside the masses, straining to be one of the first to get in, to acquire the desired item, to get the status it confers, to not miss the boat. Even if you understand the psychology of social proof, you may still have been swept up in it anyway.

Yet social proof is not just for product launches and promotions.

It’s for people, too.

When Girls Act Very Forward: Handling the Freak Test

Alek Rolstad's picture
handling the freak testYou just met this girl, but suddenly she’s all over you. Are you really THAT sexy? Don’t get excited yet: it’s only the freak test. Here’s how to handle it.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Today I will continue my series on tests. Previously, we discussed the common jealousy plot test (when girls chat or flirt with other men in front of you) and how to deal with it.

This post covers a different test linked to female attention-seeking behavior. It’s often not recognized as a test, so many fall into its trap. This test can lead to much frustration.

It’s what I call the “freak test.” It tests your reaction to overt sexual moves done by the girl.

It goes like this:

  1. A man starts an interaction with a woman.

  1. She immediately makes an overt sexual move (touches his balls, shows her tits, starts grinding on his dick, says something explicit).

  1. The man mirrors her behavior and responds because he thinks it’s appropriate, and she wants it (and rightfully so, considering her behavior).

  1. She turns cold, blocks his move, or leaves to talk with other men.

  1. The man gets frustrated and tries to persist, only to hit a wall.

He did not pass the test. And we will discuss how to pass it today.

The Dap Trap: When Girls Press & Guys "Dawdle, About-Face, Pursue"

Chase Amante's picture
dawedle, about-face, pursueA girl wants to date or maybe for you to commit. But you dawdle and don’t make it happen. So she gives up – but then, you give chase! Why? The Dap Trap!

There’s a flip-floppy male behavior you’ll see in dating that is so predictable it borders on the comical: something I’ve dubbed ‘dap’, for “dawdle, about-face, pursue.”

What to Do When Girls Run a Jealousy Plotline on You

Alek Rolstad's picture
handling jealousy plotlinesSometimes you’ll approach girls, only to have them flirt with other guys and try to make you jealous. What do you do? Ignore it… or, pull out the BIG guns.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Last week we discussed handling congruence and compliance tests. We also covered “weird tests” when a girl puts you in tricky catch-22 situations. I went through the more common tests, although some tests are unique and require case studies like in this post.

Today I want to resume my discussion about tests. We will address a common but frustrating test called the jealousy plot test. This test occurs when the girl you are with talks to other guys in front of you, even when you have a good hook going.

I won’t waste time describing the situation. If you have been going out for a while, you likely have experienced it.

This situation is more common during night game and social circle gatherings.

The 4 Reasons Girls Test Guys They Like

Alek Rolstad's picture
reasons girls test guysWhy do girls test guys? Tests can derail your courtship with a girl if you don’t respond well. Women test for 4 things; if you know what they are, you know how to pass.

Hi guys, and welcome back.

Today we will discuss handling tests. I won’t dive deep into the basics because we’ve covered that many times before.

Women will test you because they want to know if you are the real deal. It’s that simple.

If you want a refresher or more details, see:

When Women Test Men

Loving the Tests

Why Do Women Test? To Find Dominant Males

In this post, I’ll add more theoretical knowledge and provide a solid framework to help you understand tests. In upcoming posts, I’ll focus more on the practical details of handling tests.

PDA Pre-Relationship vs. Post-Consummation

Chase Amante's picture
TEXTPDA can be lots of fun in relationships. When you use it with girls you haven’t bedded yet, though, it backfires. Why’s it so different pre- vs. post-sex?

Most folks have some kind of opinion on public displays of affection (PDA).

Some like indulging in them, some don’t. Although some can go either way.

If you’re inexperienced at picking up women, but you’ve had prior relationships with PDA, you may associate such displays with “doing really well with a girl.” You’ll be out somewhere with your girlfriend, start feeling each other all up, tonguing each other down heavily, and by the time you finally get each other alone somewhere the clothes just come flying off and the passion and intensity of the sex is phenomenal.

However, when you start cold approaching, or meeting women at parties, or anywhere else you encounter strange women, and you begin using PDA on them, you start running into a different phenomenon:

The passion explodes… a girl seems really, really into you… everything is unfolding exactly how it has with prior girlfriends of yours you’ve done PDA with… yet just as you’re assuming it’s a shoe-in, this girl’s about to be yours, she ups and leaves and you don’t get the girl.

What happened? How on Earth did you lose her?

She was so into it… why would she leave?

The answer is female state control – and it’s a phenomenon you won’t (usually) see in women you’ve already consummated a sexual relationship with… but absolutely will with girls prior to consummation.