Not all men are born lady killers. Lucky for us, the seduction community has proven time and again that even YOU can get hot girls by focusing on what you can control.
Because most guys haven’t had success "just being themselves," they think verbal game is the only essential skill in seduction. There’s no possibility that a girl may be waiting to meet a guy who looks like you, right? You’re not good looking, or tall, or rich. There’s zero chance that she may be single, bored, lonely, or horny, and you’re just her type at the right time and place?
It’s the men who don’t try often enough who are the first to cry “Only looks matter!” They have inner-game issues related to their self-image (e.g., I’m ugly). So, I get them to record audio of their approaches with their phones, and unsurprisingly, their conversations are boring: no emotion, no insights, just surface level small talk. Then they wonder why they’re getting phone numbers, but not dates. It must be because they’re so ugly, they figure.
I also get these eccentric guys. They show up dressed like bums, or clowns, with nose hairs jutting out, loose, dirty clothing, or fashion from 1996 hip hop culture. They never run out of things to say, and their conversations are anything but boring. They also believe they’re the most handsome of all men. They have astronomical self-esteem. But the women don’t want anything to do with them because they feel embarrassed being seen with these guys.
So as a coach, I quickly slot men into categories:
Take the guy shopping (do a makeover)
He needs grooming
He needs inner-game confidence coaching (lacks self-esteem)
And so forth.
Every man can improve himself. But he has to believe it’s possible and be willing to put in the effort.
As far as these low-self-esteem cases, the one thing they have in common is that they’re “not enough.” They’re just not good enough (in their minds) to get the hot girls. They’re not good-looking enough, and they just don’t know what to say. They think if they could correct one of those issues, then everything would turn around for them.
That’s what they tell themselves, anyway. If they were better looking and had game, everything would work out. Well, isn’t that why we’re learning this stuff? Because we’re not all born handsome and witty?
It’s how I used to think, too: I wasn’t good enough for hot girls. I was too short, too fat, too skinny, too young, too old, too plain, and I had to talk myself attractive. Once I discovered the pickup community, it was like being handed a magic wand. All I had to do was practice these tactics and techniques, so I’d finally know exactly what to say to girls. Now, almost 14 years later, I still have no idea what to say to girls to get them to like me. But I’m a lot more confident, and women like that trait.
Here’s the truth about “Game.” As a science, it was made for average, frustrated chumps. Not good-looking, social geniuses.