Opening | Girls Chase


Your initial approach: how you first start talking to that girl you really like.

Why'd She Reject You? The 3 "Rejection Factors"

Chase Amante's picture
women on bench rejecting male suitorMost men mix up women’s different reasons for rejection into one big (confusing) soup. But if you want to stop getting rejected, you need to tease out the different rejection factors.

You see a girl you like the looks of.

You approach.

She rejects you.

Why did she reject you?

There's always a reason for it.

If you understood that reason, you could correct for it, and avoid future rejections from future girls who look like her.

Most guys will pick any old reason out of the sky ("I'm too ____" or "I'm not _____ enough!"). Or they may ask women why they rejected them, which only gets them the most superficial reasons, not the root reasons.

Yet there is a way to discern her TRUE reason for rejecting you... roughly-speaking, anyhow... that way you can zoom in on correcting it with the next women you talk to.

The 4 Best Ways to Introduce Girls to Your Wingman

Chase Amante's picture
wingman introsThere are four good ways to introduce your wingman to girls. Which you choose will depend on how well (or not) the girls have responded to you so far.

How do you approach girls with a wingman?

If you're like a lot of unskilled guys, you'll both go barreling in at once, distracting and possibly intimidating the girls.

The girls are then forced to divide their attention between two guys, and you and your 'wingman' end up in a de facto competition to try to get the girls' attention onto yourselves.

For obvious reasons, this is not so effective.

Another way I've seen guys do it wrong is the one guy opens, and the other just stands out in space and never introduces himself or gets introduced.

Not much good you can do as a wing when you're never in the conversation to, you know, wing.

What we want is to get your wingman in there with you, in a way that helps you with the girl you want and (assuming her friend is cute) sets him up to succeed with her friend too.

We need a little more strategy for this than "both guys go talk at once" or "one guy talks and the other just waits, possibly forever."

Let's talk about opening things with a wingman properly.

Tactics Tuesdays: Compliance Openers

Chase Amante's picture
compliance openersStart a new conversation with a woman by asking her to do something. Compliance openers kick off interactions with you taking the lead right from the beginning.

For intermediates and up.

Imagine if you could start off an interaction with a woman by having her follow your instructions immediately, instantly kicking things off with a frame of authority, right from the get-go.

That's compliance openers: a handy set of openers that set you up as an authority figure from the very start of your interactions.

I discussed compliance openers a bit a week ago when I talked about cycling through openers, where when a girl fails to engage much on your initial opener, you simply move to a second opener, and perhaps a third.

Today we'll look at using these more in-depth, including a number of examples, plus when to use them vs. when not to.

First, let's have a look at what compliance openers do for you.

Tactics Tuesdays: Opener Cycling

Chase Amante's picture
opener cyclingIf at first your opener doesn’t hook, try, try again. That’s the basis of opener cycling: using more than one opener on one girl. Don’t just open weak then plow.

Not every time you open a girl will she open with gusto.

Sometimes all you get is a blasé response.

She doesn't reject you, per se, but she isn't exactly ready to dive into a conversation.

You may want to just move on from a girl who's disinterested like this on the opener.

However, what if you want to persist?

If you just stand there and keep talking to her in the same way that failed to engage her the first time around, it doesn't work (I tried plenty of times as a beginner!).

Instead, you can use something I call 'opener cycling'... where you break up your early conversation, staccato-style, to attempt a variety of openers to see if you can't get her to hook.

Hector Castillo's Direct Game Compared to Others

Chase Amante's picture
hector castillo directHector’s irreverent, forward, crass style of direct seems to violate all the rules of ‘good game’. Yet take a closer look, and it’s obvious how this form of seduction succeeds.

All right gents, here's the clarifying article you've been waiting for!

Since Alek Rolstad came out swinging against the stupidly-simplified "just shoot your shot" style of 'game' we're now calling 'neo-direct', readers have been asking, "But what about Hector?"

Hector's 'sexual direct' approach to seduction appears to be everything both indirect and classic direct are not: bold, immediate, in the girl's face, relentless. It seems to show all the cards to the girl and removes any hint of intrigue.

A brief review of how his approach appears to work might make you think it's little more than neo-direct wrapped up with a bit of spunk ('force of personality', perhaps?).

Alek asked me to resolve the apparent conflict between what he teaches and what Hector does, not knowing enough about what Hector is doing and not wanting to be the one to critique a colleague.

So, I had a chat with Hector to clarify some of the points I needed clarification on.

It led me down a rather enlightening path toward understanding not just Hector's game, but a better understanding of a key difference between good game and bad game, as well.

I think you will enjoy this piece!

Tactics Tuesdays: Negging vs. Complimenting

Chase Amante's picture
negging vs. complimentingBoth compliments and negs are part of a quadrant, but few men use them right. Most use the OTHER (far less effective) side of the quadrant: flattery and insults.

I want to talk about a dichotomy today I've not seen spelled out anywhere:

That is negging vs. complimenting.

Most guys in the community these days have largely abandoned both: they won't neg and they won't (or only poorly) compliment. Yet both tools can be quite powerful... when used correctly.

Much like many things in this space, both have fallen prey to misuse and recategorization as several waves of unskilled seducers have clumsily attempted to adopt these seduction tools, giving both bad names in the process.

This article isn't necessarily a re-taking of these; I have one coming on compliments soon that I think will give you a different perspective from both the neo-direct "simple direct flattery-based compliments" style and the more indirect "don't compliment her much/at all" style.

However, in the meantime, I wanted to make a quick piece detailing the 'quadrant' negs and compliments lie on... and give you a better idea about how and when to use each.

Tactics Tuesdays: The 'Rate Your Night' Gambit

Daniel Adebayo's picture
rate your night gambitWant an easy way to kick off a conversation with a woman, gauge where she’s at, and frame talking to you as a mood-booster? This ‘rate your night’ gambit does the trick.

Nightlife venues attract scads of women each weekend, which gives you plenty of chances to meet them.

Unfortunately, these opportunities don’t usually last for long. You might spot a pretty girl standing in front of a club, then suddenly she decides to keep walking. Or you see a girl ordering a drink at the bar, and then a guy starts talking to her a moment later. You can face challenges that add layers of complexity to your approach, such as a group of girls chatting together with closed-off body language.

Since the openings to meet women are often fleeting or saddled with logistical difficulties, you must act quickly and precisely if you want to make the most of your night game opportunities.

So today, we will look at a simple gambit that anyone can use to get girls hooked. What’s more, is this gambit works just as well with groups as it does when you’re meeting a girl one-on-one. And by the time you’ve finished reading, you’ll feel equipped to start your night game pickups on the right foot.

5 Super Common Reasons Guys Get Rejected by Girls

Chase Amante's picture
girls keep rejecting youIt feels bad to get rejected by girls. It feels worse when girls keep rejecting you. If girls reject you often, it’s due to one of five (5) key reasons.

Rejection stings.

Guys would ask out a lot more girls if the fear of getting rejected by girls did not hold them back.

For those of us who've figured out approaching, of course, it's a good thing this fear holds so many guys back. Just think how much more challenging it'd be to get girls if every guy could fearlessly approach!

Yet what if you're a dating novice and girls keep rejecting you?

Well, if you're a learner, and you've embarked on bringing new women into your life, that fear of being rejected by girls is one of the hurdles you must overcome.

You overcome it in part by learning how to act when a girl rejects you.

You also overcome it in part by becoming more resilient to rejection itself.

However, you additionally must overcome it by learning the reasons why women reject men, and adjusting your approach to correct for them... or, if correction can't be made (as with our first reason below), then accepting it and steeling yourself against a little rejection as an unavoidable part of 'the game' (you didn't think it would be a total cakewalk, did you?).

So here it is, our top five (5) reasons girls reject guys... plus what things you can do about it.

How to 'Meet Smooth' in Street Game

Daniel Adebayo's picture
street game meet smoothYou can approach women on the street without it seeming awkward. Follow these few simple steps to approach women smoothly while out and about.

Meeting new girls on the street presents tough challenges.

Whether you’re new to the game or an experienced veteran, the time and effort you spend here feel like a grind since the girls you see are all going somewhere, making it hard to get consistent results.

But what if there were simple steps you could take toward a smoother street game approach?

Think about the scads of great-looking girls you’ve seen on the street. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to create the kinds of first impressions that will boost your odds of successfully dating and bedding them?

Today we’ll look at how you can do just that. And by the time you’ve finished reading this article, you’ll find yourself equipped with a fresh, potent strategy to upgrade your street game skills.

Let’s dive in.

Tactics Tuesdays: Be Friendly

Chase Amante's picture
be friendlyA simple tactic that makes gobs of difference: just be friendly. Opening’s easier, hooking’s easier, and social proof becomes well-nigh automatic.

Here's a deceptively simple tactic:

Be friendly to every person you encounter.

Just yesterday we talked about conflict escalation and the dog-eat-dog world inside the prison system.

The good news is, you're a free man, and you're not in that kind of world. In this world, unless you venture into a bad part of town, you can and should be friendly to everybody.

Any time I've felt some rust or a renewed sense of approach anxiety, "be friendly to people" is the primary tactic I use to shake that off. Alek followed this same advice recently when he sought to warm up his social momentum after over a year of almost uninterrupted citywide lockdowns. It's simple, basic advice but it really works.

"Be friendly" has a ton of upsides for getting yourself approaching more easily with a lot less fear.

If you've only been doing targeted approaching -- where the only people you approach are sufficiently good-looking girls -- you may well find this alternate tactic a breath of fresh air.