Confidence | Girls Chase


How confidence affects results with women, and how to get your confidence, boldness, and "inner game" tightened up and running smoothly.

Legendary Charisma Is All in Where You Put Your FOCUS

Chase Amante's picture
legendary charismaCharisma is a set of outward signals and behaviors, but it begins in the mind. The wrong mental focus makes you uncharismatic. Yet use the right one, and you magnetize.

We've got two (2) days remaining in the Charisma In A Bottle relaunch.

This is probably the last thing I'll write about charisma for a while, since I'm just about all charisma'd out.

However, before we put a bow on the relaunch, I want to cover this one last key tidbit about charisma:

How huge an element focus is to a man's ability to be charismatic, and just what is entailed in getting your focus dialed in just right.

Charisma Breakdown: Robert Downey, Jr.

Chase Amante's picture
Robert Downey, Jr. charismaWhat’s the secret to Robert Downey, Jr.’s exuberant charisma? He’s a perceptive guy who reacts fast to whatever situation he’s in, and it all adds up to magnetism.

All right! We're partway into the Charisma In A Bottle relaunch.

I hope you've picked up your copy already if you didn't grab it a year ago, and are thoroughly enjoying the material.

If you've not grabbed it yet, keep in mind there are just a few short days left before the Touch-A-Girl System bonus goes away, and you'll never see Charisma + Lifestyle + Touch for the same one price again.

Pick up your copy of Charisma In A Bottle with all the bonuses (+ Touch) right here.

Today I wanted to continue the 'Charisma Breakdown' series, and I wanted to use a modern actor everyone's quite familiar with. We're taking a break from super sexy charisma (as we had with Errol Flynn, Sean Connery, and Russell Brand) and moving back into super cool charisma (like we had with our first charisma breakdown of John Wayne).

In this installment, we'll be looking at Robert Downey, Jr.

There are already a lot of charisma analysis videos online centered on Downey. They've done a great job mining clips and have provided some nice high-level analysis.

What we'll do in this article will be to take some of the clips other YouTube channels have already put together, and drilling down past the surface-level aspects of charisma on display to really get into the nuts and bolts of what makes Downey's charisma work.

Charisma Breakdown: Sean Connery

Chase Amante's picture
sean connery charismaWhat made Sean Connery’s James Bond so compelling? Connery’s relaxed, provocative, self-amused style gave his characters a charismatic air unlike any other actor’s.

I've always liked Sean Connery.

The way he carries himself and interacts with women has always impressed.

It's no coincidence that Connery (as we've covered on Girls Chase before) even into his 80s still had admiring female fans in their teens, twenties, and thirties talking about how sexy they found him. You can go click on that link and read a few screenshots I took of it if you want evidence.

What made Connery so sexy? He had good looks, and he had his leading man roles, and the wealth, fame, and status that came with those. But there are plenty of men like that in Hollywood -- more classically good-looking, with bigger roles, more wealth, fame, and status -- who don't command close to the kind irresistible charm Connery did.

That special something Connery had that set him a head above his peers was charisma -- in particular, charisma embodying the Father archetype from our four Charismatic Archetypes, covered far more in-depth in my upcoming course, Charisma in a Bottle.

If you're just tuning in, here are our prior three entries in the Charismatic Breakdown series:

  1. John Wayne: King Archetype charisma
  2. Russell Brand: Savior Archetype charisma
  3. Errol Flynn: Hero Arcehtype charisma

Now let's have a look at just how Sean Connery did it.

How to Push Through Adversity to Reach Your Goals, Pt. 1

Alexander Regal Tiger's picture
how to push through adversityEveryone has struggles to deal with. Sometimes those struggles may all but break you. If you can learn to push through them, on the other side you can begin to achieve again.

Adversity is like a strong wind. I don’t just mean that it holds us back from places we might otherwise go. It also tears away from us all but the things that cannot be torn, so that afterward we see ourselves as we really are, and not merely as we might like to be.

—Arthur Golden

Hey GC!

Chase has given me the green light to talk about something a little different today with the start of this series. It’s about dealing with adversity, building mental and emotional resilience, and finding your personal “why” in life. You’ll notice that dealing with adversity is especially important when learning seduction—because women can be frustrating even at the best of times.

But not just women, sometimes life itself isn’t the grooviest, and we have to learn how to navigate it to get what we want.

This series will be about what I’ve learned and what I’ve seen help other people. I’ll include the wave technique to help beat depression that Girls Chase has reposted, and I’ve condensed it to re-share. And I’m going to share a small portion of my story so you know where I’m coming from.

Pickup Problems Faced by Intermediate Seducers

Alek Rolstad's picture
pickup problemsIntermediate-level playboys have problems too. Their problems picking up women are different from beginners. They get some success now… but now come the plateaus, inconsistency, and ego.

Hey guys, welcome back.

Today I want to address a rarely discussed subject: issues intermediate and advanced players face with their learning curves. We often talk about difficulties beginners face, such as approach and escalation anxiety, lack of motivation and confidence, and even becoming depressed.

I know coaches who specialize in helping beginners. They spend time motivating them and playing the role of a therapist so beginners deal with whatever issue they may face while teaching them the basic skillset.

Many products are also geared toward beginners. They give a basic understanding of social dynamics and teach them the fundamentals of pickup and seduction.

Fewer products or coaching programs are dedicated to intermediate practitioners and even fewer to advanced guys. I will get to why that is.

I am careful about calling a top-tier advanced guy a student since they might hire me as a consultant to get an external perspective or learn about something I specialize in to master a new area.

Take a moment to jot down some challenges these two groups of students face. Then I will share a few words on dealing with these issues.

Why Do Guys Screw Up When the Girl Is Really Hot?

Chase Amante's picture
hot girl screwupsHow come when a girl is really hot, you mess up more, even if you don’t with more average girls? There’s a reason for it – and it happens to almost every guy, too.

I recently received an email from a long-time acquaintance who'd left England to begin traveling through Central and South America and get back to picking up girls again while also working as a yoga instructor.

He'd continued sleeping with average girls from dating apps over the lockdowns, then once his trip started, he bedded a few more average girls from hostels. Assuming all was good with his game, and he must be rust-free, he then proceeded to meet an extremely beautiful Argentinian girl... and it all fell apart.

He says:

I met physically my perfect girl who was working on the tour desks. She’s Argentinian and I’m really into Latin girls.  I suggested she joined me for dinner and it went really well. I deep dived alot and after dinner moved her to a quiet sofa outside by the pool.  She was a little bit tipsy by now from all the Argentinian wine at dinner, and was sitting super close to me.  She also told me what an amazing evening she’d had and hugged me twice for a long time.  It was the obvious escalation window, only I didn’t do anything!

My reasoning was that I’m new here and don’t want to seem like I was taking advantage of her when she was drunk.  I figured I had loads of other opportunities.  It was also late and I had to teach yoga in the morning. So we hugged and went our separate ways. 

That was a big mistake!  She text me the next morning saying how good a night she had. Now all I was thinking about is ‘this is going to be the hottest girl I’ve slept with, when can I get her alone again!’  So I went into full on chasing mode, suggesting she came with me on my weekend trip and suggesting a load of other potential dates. Plus inviting her to come and stay with me in London!

By time we had dinner it was the next week and by then her long distance boyfriend was unexpectedly coming to see her for a day later in the week.  She’d also been offered a job in Tulum and was leaving at the weekend.  This made me think ‘this is my last chance, need to impress her’ so I was way too high energy. Got her back to my room to drink wine on the balcony, but waited way too long to do anything, plus hadn’t been touching her or leading the conversation towards sex.

Also I’d been doing way too much deep diving that it had become an interview.  She was tired so I knew it was my last chance, so tried to kiss her with no setup.  She said she just wanted to keep things as they are as we get on really well and I said nothing to persuade her otherwise!  I just waited a while and tried to escalate a couple more times, which again was chasing and unsuccessful.

I spoke to her a few times around the hostel in the week afterwards, but just casual friendly stuff. Turns out I’ll be in Tulum next weekend, she said let her know, but feel like it would be hard to arrange to see her without it seeming like I’m chasing.  I was so mad with myself the next day! The escalation window had been wide open with a super hot girl, and I decided to walk away! But at least it lead to me re-reading a lot of your stuff!

Now, it wasn't like his game just completely disappeared. Because the very next day this happened:

The next day I had another tinder date with a Mexican girl who didn’t speak English.  As I really didn’t care about her of course my game was great and quickly slept with her and had a great night!

He wraps up by asking:

Would you say there should be no difference between game with 10’s than average tinder date girls? If you haven’t written an article on this I think it’s an interesting topic. And how would you play seeing the Argentinian girl again?

I've written about that in places, in snippets, but I don't think I've ever devoted a complete article to the subject.

So, let's do that now. Let's talk about why guys screw up with really hot girls... and whether you can (and should) approach them exactly the same as more ordinary, average, or cute girls.

Some Friends Are Bad for Your Dating Health

Chase Amante's picture
friends bad for datingDon’t let friends’ unproductive beliefs about women seep into your skull. Be careful how the friends around you affect the way you think about dating, sex, and romance.

Friends are great assets to your life. They give you companionship, encouragement, and can introduce new ideas and activities to your sphere you might never have encountered on your own.

Friends can push you into great new things... however, the wrong friend can also hold you back.

On our forum, a member named Shawn discusses how a friend of his warped his mindset toward women, making him far less effective with women as a result:

... since I was going through dry-spell, I just believed whatever he used to say so that at least I'll try something different.There are many things but just off the top of my head: not to tease girls cos it'll come across as try hard, should be friends with girls and take it slow, game is all red-pill and that's bad etc etc There are many things [he told me] but just off the top of my head: not to tease girls cos it'll come across as try hard, should be friends with girls and take it slow, game is all red-pill and that's bad etc etc. I can go on for hours about his advices.

He is the first person I saw so closely putting pussy on a pedestal. He is so sure of himself that whenever I tried to tell him that's not the right way to treat chics, he'd get so defensive that it'd make me wonder if what I'm preaching is even right. He had read pickup material for 4 years. So, I thought he at least has enough knowledge theoritically.

Anyway, like I said earlier, it was just my mistake to get into his frame thinking he's "better" and I do much better solo.

You might think Shawn must be a clueless newbie, but he isn't. About his game before this friend twisted his approach all out of shape, he says:

I was always considered a natural since I discovered game only 3 years ago while I was getting laid through cold-approach long before I knew something like game or cold-approach existed.

I don't know how skilled Shawn is, but cold approach itself is a fairly rare skill set that most men will never attempt on their own. The fact that he was doing it himself (and getting laid with it) implies he's far from a total novice.

But the wrong friend still managed to derail him anyway.

If you're not careful, and you're in a vulnerable state (like the dry spell Shawn found himself in), the wrong friend can have that kind of effect on you, too.

Can You Get Every Girl?

Alek Rolstad's picture
get every girlIs it possible to attain every girl if you get good enough with women? Or are there limits? A realistic look at the upper echelons of ladykilling skills.

Hey guys.

Today I would like to offer a few words about what is achievable and what we can hope to attain in pickup and seduction. There are two schools of thought on this subject.

The first is the pessimistic view that a girl is either into you or not, and at the first sign of a challenge, you need to consider it a rejection.

And the other is the optimistic view that you can get any girl.

Both these extremes are flawed. I will attempt to show you why and then present my view.

We will approach this by covering both views first and discussing why each is flawed. Then I will give you my perspective, which is a synthesis of both.

Charisma Breakdown: Errol Flynn

Chase Amante's picture
errol flynnHollywood’s most prolific, charismatic womanizer of all time, Errol Flynn was a magnetic force unlike any other. Just what made Flynn so utterly irresistible?

Welcome to the third installment in this Charisma Breakdown series.

For the series, I've been breaking down the mannerisms and behaviors of wildly charismatic individuals, along the lines of the four Charismatic Archetypes we discuss in greater depth in my soon-to-be-rereleased course, Charisma in a Bottle.

You can see the previous two installments here:

  1. Charisma Breakdown: John Wayne (King Archetype)

  2. Charisma Breakdown: Russell Brand (Savior Archetype)

It was my intention to do the Father Archetype next, then the Hero, but it's been a bit of a challenge finding good Father Archetype charismatics who also fit a seductive role. I think I'll most likely do Sean Connery for that, who fits the Father Archetype, and for whom I've promised to do a charisma breakdown for a while.

Meantime though, I'm just too eager to get to Errol Flynn... so we're going to jump ahead here to do the Hero.

Today we cover cinema's most legendary swashbuckler and Hollywood's biggest ever real-life charismatic womanizer: the magnetic, the charming, the irresistible Errol Flynn.

Seducing Women to Sex vs. Guarding Daughters from Sex

Chase Amante's picture
lovers vs. daughtersHow can a seducer view sleeping with women as morally correct… while knowing he likely wouldn’t want his daughter to sleep around? A deep dive into sexual morality.

On Alek's recent piece showcasing three new sex talk gambits, a reader posted the following provocative comment:

Hello Alek.

I've noticed something about Girls Chase and the seduction community at large.

There seems to be a lot of cognitive bias and intellectual dishonesty in this space Re: "Sluts".

See, in this space we teach that women are human beings just like men and should therefore be free to engage in sex freely w/o judgement.

Additionally, the concept of "high body count" is a non issue to us "lovers" unless seeking an LTR.

However, the facts show that "most" women are NOT in fact built for casual sex. Most high n count women either have personality disorders, histories of child abuse, poor impulse control or high sex drives.

For the most part women barter sex for relationships and constant hookups for the average chick without committment damages her psyche. That's why FWB chicks sometimes get jaded and tired of empty sex.

Here's a thought, if women like sex so much, why cant they hold down an FWB arrangemnt in perpetuity like men would prefer?

Chase has also countered the argument that older seducers do not corrupt younger girls by fucking them young 18/19yo) because women have agency and can think for themselves.

Yet we also go on to say that women are cute little smurfs who need guidance and direction. They aren't the best decision makers particularly when young.

In short all these axioms we have here seem to be rationalisations for "lovers" to be able to fuck girls without suffering from guilt.

And one way I can prove this is to request an article titled "A Letter to my 18yo Daughter" or sth along these lines giving her advice on how to manouver sexual relations as she goes off to start her first year in college.

Would you still tell your daughter that its okay to fuck a smooth talking guy on the first date if she feels the vibe?

Would you still tell her that body count is a social construct used by prudes and puritans? One nightstands are perfectly okay.

Would you still allow her to be fucked by older dudes (30s) while in her first year of college because older man + younger chick is a completely normal thing to do?

I find it hard hard to fully embody the lover archetype because it frequently clashes with the patriach archetype inside me who thinks he might have a daughter one day.

And I understand that this site does not give womens advice because it is a mens site for MEN but in this case saying that might be an easy cop out from addressing the disingenious nature of the things we teach here Re: Women and Sex

Is it possible to be a lover and a patriach without experiencing cognitive dissonance?

Trillion Dollar Question.

I love this question, and I'd love to answer it... so, while it may be addressed to Alek, I'd like to weigh in with my thoughts on it too.