How to Date (and Sleep with!) Religious Girls | Girls Chase

How to Date (and Sleep with!) Religious Girls

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date religious girlsReligion is a touchy subject for many.

And in terms of seduction, it can make even the most able of seducers confused and frustrated.

But the thing about religious girls, just like feminists, “perfect 10s,” models or any other out of the ordinary girl is that at the end of the day – they are still just girls.

They still want to be loved and have amazing sex and be led by a dominant man.

But if they are religious, they are told that they shouldn’t want the sex part; which creates a varied spectrum of life decisions depending on how devout a particular female is.

So, today, I’m going to discuss this spectrum, and how to deal with taking religious girls to bed… and what to expect if you choose to date them.

Colt WilliamsAbout the Author: Colt Williams

Raised in the American Midwest, Colt Williams made a name for himself in dating with a style based on soulful poetic seductions and playful dance floor antics. His style is all about inspiring girls and drawing them into one’s world. You can book phone coaching with him here, or get a copy of his guide to getting laid on Tinder, the product of months of study and experimentation by him on the medium.

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Comments

Anonymous's picture

Hey Colt.

I've actually been introduced a week or two back by a friend of mine to his cousin who has recently been baptized and stuff. I'm not really sure in which category she falls under, but she's the "God this and God that" typa girl who sometimes acts a bit like The Insecure Girl Who Used to be Religious. She attends a lot of church-related events and likes to refer to the Bible in any given situation and in many things I've said to her. She's 16. On first meet, we chilled in a car parked outside their yard for about an hour or so talking and laughing openly about her past where she consistently compared me to the casanovas she's been with before the time of her baptism. Our conversation got to a point where she'd literally feel disappointed that I wouldn't let on about my past as she has - it got mildly awkward and uncomfortable so I decided to up and leave.

The next day I got a call from this good friend of mine and he had the girl on the line. She asked me if she could see me before she leaves for school. During our conversation in the car I lied to her about my religious beliefs, in fact about a lot of things that'd manage to get her off my back about how God changed her life and how he could change mine too, anyway, She gave me a hug and saved her numbers on my phone. The following day Before I even thought about calling her, she shot me a rather mood-amplifying call to check up on me and see if I am doing well or whatelse, followed by two
sms/s: "I alwys thnk god abt u,i wl alwys cre abt u ohk,gd bls u.wl twk 2mrw aftr skwl" and "U jst trst in th lrd nd whn u r rdy 2 2wk u knw wt 2 do"... I've known her for two days at the time of the call and sms/s. What I have noted about her is that she takes love, sex and relationships way too seriously for her age, to a point of serious commitment and further marriage.

"I've danced the night way, been with a boy who'd beat the living daylights out of me" she'd remind me, "and yet here I am because of (guess who)" with an assuring smile on her face. She falls more into The Faithful Girl and The last time I spoke to her was on a Saturday evening when I told her that I won't be bumping into her on the provincial school trip to some science expo. (today) so she proposed that I pay her a visit whenever my schedule is free, (usually on weekends) instead.

What strikes me about this girl though, is her constant indulgence in my past sexual relationships. Questions like: do you believe in sex after marriage (in other words: are you still a virgin) or how many girls have you slept with and do you enjoy sex.

It makes me wonder what she wants to see me for.

Author
Colt Williams's picture

Anon,

Sorry the massive delay! But let's get to it.

As with most religious girls, this seems like a very complex situation. Let me start by saying that because this girl is so young, she probably felt 'used' or 'slutty' if she let herself fall for multiple seducers in her adolescent past.

It sounds like she does like you, but in the eyes of her religion and her community, she doesn't want to hook up with a guy just for the sake of sex. So when she asks those questions, she's sizing you up as a partner. She wants to hear something like "I've had sex with a couple of girls (or haven't had sex), but I strongly believe in sex only in marriage and with the right person." Then at that point, I think that if you tried to date this girl, it would probably work, but there would be a massive amount of resistance to sex. 1. Because of the experiences she's already had and 2. because of her perceived religious duty.

And if you did have sex, she'd probably feel very guilty about it afterward. Overall, unless you very deeply care about this girl, and are willing to make some huge sacrifices, I'd say spare yourself the trouble and find a girl who you can be honest with and vibes with the way you live your life.

All the best,

Colt

Anonymous's picture

Hey, i've been reading many articles on this site explaining the writers own views of life and was actually interested in knowing what yours or any other writers like Chase's view was in religeon and their your own beliefs.

Author
Colt Williams's picture

Anon,

I appreciate your curiosity! I am a deeply spiritual person, but don't strictly subscribe to any religion because I find a lot of problems and inconsistencies with specific religions. but I completely respect anyone else's sense of beliefs. I will probably talk about this more in-depth at some point, but I hope that's a good enough answer for now!

-Colt

Craig17's picture

Soo my girl is in the fourth group, and I've gotten her to the point where she will say yes to sex with me. Her parents are pushing her hard not to tho, as well as her other religious friends. Since they noticed she had an interest, her parents are no longer allowing her to see me on any basis. What should i do in this situation? Its just that i was really into her and she really wanted me as well.
Thanks for any help.

Craig17

Author
Colt Williams's picture

Craig,

That's a tough situation, I know how that goes.

Really there are only 2 things you can do.

Either 1. Let it go, and find a girl who wouldn't be so much trouble to bed.
or 2. You have to be much more secretive about when you meet her and make it clear that if you escalate to sex it'll be "your little secret" to her. If you manage to go with two, it will only heighten the experience for her when she sneaks off to meet up with you and sleep with her lover while maintaining her good girl image, which is really what every girl in our society wants.

Good luck sir,

Colt

savacheone's picture

Dear Colt,

Thanks for sharing a very insightful article. Before I start my queries, I'll share a bit about myself. I'm a Christian male, 28 yrs old and have a well-paying professional job. I live in an Asian city state which has girls of Chinese ethnicity as their majority, but is rich and modern. It is certainly considered a first world country by WTO standards. I serve in church and would say I'm relatively respected by my peers. However, I'm also sexually active and had several bed buddies which I've primarily sourced from internet dating sites (no one knows about this). The one barrier I've never been able to cross and will not cross is penetrative sex.

My query is simple: How do I convince and identify religious women (probably in category #4 and #5) in specifically an Asian country which (pretends) to have a conservative outlook and bed these hot Christian babes? I don’t even want penetrative sex with them- oral sex would make me a very happy man.

The real challenge here is that ladies in my country feel that their socially compelled to be chaste, unlike USA, where liberal sexuality is quite acceptable. I normally am able to strike up a conversation with these girls easily, either about religion or anything else. But when I deep-dive about religion, which I’m pretty good at, it sparks good conversation but probably dampens their sexual desire. Conversely, if my conversations are peppered with sexual suggestiveness, they roll their eyes and become somewhat defensive.

I would be grateful to hear your insights on my predicament.

Also, it would be great if one of the writers here could write about bedding girls from conservative countries. I do know that white men have an advantage bedding girls in my country though, but I want to know how we indigenous guys can achieve similar success.

Anonymous's picture

Are you from Singapore?

Anonymous's picture

Smart Dude!

Author
Colt Williams's picture

savacheone,

I have been to this city-state of yours, and know exactly what you mean. I think the easiest way to handle your situation would be to A) focus on arranging a meet-up with them one-on-one where it would be easier to discuss sexual topics and B) frame your interactions as an "us against them" mentality as Alek did in his threesome article. Have a strong sexy vibe going, and make a comment about how women are taught to be conservative in your country, but you think it's unfair and limits the amount of great relationships that could happen.

And C) don't treat them with kid gloves. Obviously some women are conservative, but I've found that it's the conservative women who are most looking for a dominant man to sweep them off your feet, so try to be a little bit of a bad boy in their eyes, and that will illicit a strong reaction from women.

Finally, I suggest reading some of David Tian's stuff. His entire focus is on girls from your country, and I bet he could provide bucketloads more useful information that I could.

Good luck to you,

Colt

Unwelcome Christian's picture

It sounds like you aren't content to rest in the promises of Jesus Christ, so you're looking for satisfaction outside of him (while trying to conform to your culture and hollow biblical legalism). I would also examine your motivations to keep these relations as clandestine as you do. If all you fear is a loss of social respectability, I would recommend quietly disengaging from the church. But I doubt that's what you're after-- I expect you understand who Jesus is well enough to know his worth.

What I would most practically recommend is: quit soliciting oral sex from online, date women in your community, marry one, and have real sex as often as you both like. Your desire for healthy relationships with good women is being tarnished by these casual sex partners.

robertnyc's picture

Another type of religious girl that I have encountered is the reformed bad girl. Usually these girls were wild in their teenage years and early 20's but became religious after sowing their wild oats. They now are pretty active in their churches but still dress provocatively and look pretty sexy. I can't tell if religion is a passing fad for them or why they got into it because it seems like sexuality is still simmering under the surface but they are holding themselves back.

Any tips on how to seduce thee reformed bad girls?

Author
Colt Williams's picture

Robert,

Thanks for the comment; see my response to Anon below!

Cheers,

Colt

Anonymous's picture

I was raised in a very religious family, I mean my grandparents are all clergies/children of clergies. I've seen a lot of strictness and experienced a lot of conflicts first-hand.

I'm 19 now and recently I saw my parents marriage go to ruins...
I think maybe...
it's because my parents rushed to marriage at a very young age when they were not marriage material for other needs...

my Grandad who is religious yet experienced, said to me that I should have casual encounters and tell girls I'm temporary marrying them for a night or a week (that's actually a thing i my relgion 'Shia Islam' btw!!)

Out of experience he saw that as a young man in the west I have such need to get laid, and he's right... and well I've been making life awesome.

I'm on holidays in Iran now, and have made a few approaches, funny thing... when most of these women realize I have western freedom-kind beliefs they are very open to me... I mean very open! (in italic)

About that last part in this article, I urge religious not to make the mistakes that I've seen have been made by religious people. Also increase the attention they give to their wife after marriage a lot!

Anonymous's picture

I agree with RobertNYC that there is another classification that is poorly lacking in this article, the girl who was average and then became very religious.

These girls are not virgins and have chosen their religion rather than being raised religious. Some were wild party girls before and others were just average with their own sense of morals but they all have a point in their life where they weren't happy and found religion which is now making their lives better (in their perspective). So now they behave similar to the Faithful and Intensely Devout Girl.

But figuring out how to proceed with these women is mind boggling. I have found myself trying to steer conversations towards their past, as it is easier to relate to, but it completely ignores who they are at the moment which falls short for building a connection. My intuition and experience tells me that these girls are not first nighters and desire more commitment (along the lines of a serious relationship) before going to bed, but once that commitment is there you don't have to wait for marriage.

Up to this point I usually give up before getting to bed with them because I don't feel that they are worth the work, but now I have found a girl that is worth the work and I don't want to screw it up. So any insights on how to proceed from this point?

We have had several hour long conversations and recently she invited me to church which turned into an enjoyable afternoon of hanging out and getting to know each other. Due to schedule conflicts we are planning something casual (hiking with unplanned hanging out afterwards) a few weeks from now. I will see her in the meantime, but probably not where we are one-on-one. Thanks in advance.

Author
Colt Williams's picture

Anon,

it's actually interesting that you mention the reformed bad girl. I considered writing that up as another category, but decided that there wasn't enough difference between a couple of the other ones. But it looks like I was wrong!

I actually dated a reformed bad girl for quite a long time and it was one of the most fulfilling and one of the most challenging relationships I've ever had.

One the one hand, you can approach relations with them in a very sexual way. Since they have such a high sex drive, they will respond to your advances and will probably be some of the more passionate girls you can be with. But this will probably leave them feeling "set back" or "up to their old ways" and will make them very upset.

On the other hand, you could do it in a very traditional "let's chill and go on dates" kind of way. This gets them really excited about you as a person, but risks you losing that sexual "spark." This actually happened to me with my reformed bad girl. I took it really slow in the beginning because I respected her new lifestyle, and after a few dates, she told me that she had begun dating someone else.

We eventually got together (and I do mean eventually) but that was because I became 10x more sexual as a man.

But in the end, with reformed bad girls *you have to give them the whole package*. You have to be very sexual, but you have to frame it to them that your sexual desire comes from how much you value them as a person and not just as a body to have sex with. I would always tell my girl that I loved how curious she was, and how persistent she was with her goals, and a bunch of other things *in addition* to her being crazy sexy, and that I wanted her because she had the whole package.

And that always worked *perfectly*. You have to validate them as women and as religious girls. But I will tell you, this style takes a lot of your energy, and it's one that needs constant upkeep and maintenance. Basically you're going to have to do it a lot. But if you're up for that, go for it!

All the best,

Colt

Joelo's picture

I have been asking this female neighbor out. She is a Jehovah's Witness. For along time she resisted but later asked me if it will lead to marriage. I did not answer her. Should I go back and accept that it will? Actually, she is a virgin. All I want is to have sex with her.

Travis44's picture

Hey Colt,

Great article. I have a question as I am seeing a girl who is a #5 Faithful Girl by your description. We have gotten very intimate doing everything but penetrative sex, as she says she is waiting until marriage.

When you said "The most effective way I’ve encountered to make this happen is to express how much you appreciate her, and how connected the two of you are, and how sex is that necessary final step". What do I say exactly to express this to her effectively? Should I bring it up the next time we are intimate with each other?

I definately like her as she is unlike anyone I have previously date and can see myself wanting something long term with her.

Thanks
Travis

Anonymous's picture

Hi,
Nice Article, my girl friend is #5 and we haven't had sex yet out of mutual agreement. Even I share her religious beliefs and would like to wait until marriage which may occur in 2 years from now... Also i don't wanna rush into marriage for obvious reasons.
Earlier on I was ok with the no sex and no kissing rule, (well we started kissing but still no french kissing) and I don't know if i can hold on for two full years for sex.
I really don't know.
Honestly even I am unsure as to whether I must have sex or not.
And by asking for it, I don't want to ruin my reputation with her, she thinks so high of me, but at the end of the day I too got hormones...
Really confused and don't know what to do...
Cheers

Anonymous's picture

What if the girl has joined the church already? Is it better to just leave her be?

Anonymous's picture

Hi... so I bumped into your post about dating christian girls. I am a non-christian girl and I really really like this guy who unfortunately is extremely religious. And I accept and respect that. However, after our first kiss he realized it is not a practical thing to do and the bible explicitly says 'do not yoke with non believers'.... and he takes like EVeRY WORD of the bible for granted. The thing is ...I still really like this guy and I would reaaaally like to at least date him...not even go further than that....it's so annoying the internet is full of "how to convince a christian girl to be with you" but there's nothing about convincing a guy!!!

Franco Lombardi's picture

Anon,

You mention this:

However, after our first kiss he realized it is not a practical thing to do and the bible explicitly says 'do not yoke with non believers'.... and he takes like EVeRY WORD of the bible for granted.

Before you start thinking about how to "convince" a Christian guy to date you, I think you really need to be asking yourself, "do I actually want to date a heavily Christianized guy?"

This guy obviously believes heavily in his faith and takes it very seriously, which is fine if you're a woman who understands what this actually entails. If you're getting upset because he's taking the Bible literally verse by verse, then it sounds like you're barking up the wrong tree because that's who this man is at his core.

Instead of trying to change him, or change his beliefs for that matter, I would first think about what it is that makes him attractive to you. And then I would decide whether that attraction actually has a strong foundation (i.e. great connection, similar interests, similar beliefs, similar goals) or if it's based off of surface-level interest (i.e. physically attractive, kind, shows interest). The difference between these types of attraction is that the former actually constitutes great compatibility while the latter constitutes a basic minimum requirement from any man that you should be attracted to.

However, if you feel like you're ready to start attending church two to three times a week, going to bible studies, saying prayers at the kitchen table, watching your foul language in public, and possibly having to wait until marriage to have sex with him, then maybe this is your type of man. If that is the case, then just continue to see him when he wants to see you and allow him to move at the pace that he wants to move at.

- Franco

Anonymous's picture

Hey there Franco, I'm one of those religious types and I just wanted to give you props on that rock solid response. I could not have said it better.

Anonymous's picture

Hey, thanks for your reply and advice!

However, I find it a little weird everybody keeps asking me to reconsider whether I really want to date him. I DO want to be with him. Right now! Right here! :D Even if it's for the superficial reasons you mentioned (kind, attractive, interested)... Life is more interesting when people aren't exactly the same. It's exciting, challenging and fun! I'm not in it because I want to necessarily spend the rest of my life with this guy. or who knows, maybe I will want to. but for now I just want to explore being with him ... except he friendzoned me all of a sudden and he seems very decided... like one night we kiss wildly and he tells me he really likes me and even holds my hand and stuff and the next day he feels super sinful and very sorry to have led me on and tells me he only dates christian girls because that's what god says he should do...

I really am looking for practical ways to convince him back into being with me rather than questioning my own decision. The fact that I'm a girl doesn't necessarily mean I am looking for serious relationships that automatically have to end up in marriage. I just want to live the present and not overthink.

Franco Lombardi's picture

Anon,

Well, I certainly admire your enthusiasm! I would lie if I said it didn't make me smirk a bit. =)

I am assuming you are quite young -- probably under 24 years old. One thing I would keep in mind here is that guys are a lot more "mechanical" when it comes to the ways of thinking about women and relationships. So when a guy sees a situation like this one where he has a girl that doesn't fit the mold of what he "sees" as relationship material (and is obviously not interested in anything physical/sexual for "dating"), he probably immediately rationalizes that its better to have you as a friend than it is a girlfriend. And this seems to match the action that you mentioned he took (which was to friendzone you).

Another thing that you may not have considered is the potential damage getting intimate with you could cause him. If he's freaking out about you two just kissing... what do you think would happen if you two were to get sexual with each other? You might completely send him into disarray, and he might end up feeling super guilty about his actions. It's even possible that he might come to resent you for "tempting" him into doing something he feels is morally against his beliefs. So tread carefully here.

With all of the above being said, sometimes the best advice is experience. I'm only giving you this advice because I've experienced chasing after extremely religious girls myself, but I would not have known any of this had I not dove head-first into all of it. So I would recommend continuing to pursue this guy if that's really what you want to do -- your experiences with him will be the best teacher in this situation!

- Franco

Butcheenz's picture

Howdy, about 2 months ago I started talking/seeing a girl who is the same age as me (17 years of age). I took her on 2 dates to get to know her before I asked her to be my girlfriend. I was aware of her religious background but I was not aware of the decisions that she had made referring to anything sexual.

On my birthday, she had bought up the question "what does sex mean to you?" which i replied "its pretty cool, why is that" as I did not think much of the question at the time. She replied and informed me that she had actually made a life decision about keeping her virginity and not doing anything else sexual until marriage. This led to awkward silence and me trying to find the right words for this situation. I told her I would never be able to find myself doing a commitment like that. She questioned whether we should break up and find others who can fill our needs. Her words startled me and the thought of breaking up with her made me sick. I told her that I didn't want to break up with her and that I thought we should keep going and see what would happen.

I can't wait til marriage though, seriously that is messed up. Who even knows if we will get married?

I can't break up with her too though, is the 'life decision' she made when she was 10 possible to crack open without being a sleaze who only wants sex?

#jesusisacockblock's picture

Hello Mr Butcheenz,

It does indeed seem like bit of a non physical sticky situation you have yourself in here. Considering all the other options regarding your values and beliefs it sounds like you are very eager for this kind of "Hard to get Puss". In order to make you final decision on what to do, I think it is imperative that you weigh the options and alternatives in this situation, as you will see I have done below:

1. You could finish reading this point, go out and buy the fucking shittiest ring possible, drive to her house and propose to her in order to get some of that untouched snatch
2. Run. Run as far away as your tiny little Italian haze stallion legs can take you. Take the risk, cut that bitch off and be looked down and frowned apon by her entire cohort of religion followers for the rest of your life
3. Make a Tshirt #Jesusisacockblock, sell them to all the unlucky fellows out there whose women have decided that fuck your needs, I'm going to be selfish and not let you fumble around with my vaginal cavities.
4. As a wise preasent once said "loosen her up, and get her fanny fluttering so much when showing her your massive bear cock that she will hear the waves breaking from her vagina from miles away"
Or 5. Have a night out with the boys, down 37 beers and have a vote with the lads on what they think should happen because let's be honest, that is the most important thing in your life.

Hope this has helped,
Regards,
Gatsey

Ryan Reiddy's picture

First of all....sorry for my bad english....

Well, my situation is completely different from the post. Believe me or not, I'm the religious one who's beginning to date a non-religious girl. Don't ask me why, but I have to keep it secretly. No, I'm not married. I know it's weird, but it's true.

I'd like your advices: Is it possible to keep it secretly ? If yes, how to do it without ruin everything ? I mean, everytime we go out, if we're going to a more private place, that's ok. But if she chooses to go to the mall or another public place my heart beats like a death metal band drum. I get so nervous that I act strangely

But I really like her. Sometimes I even think about tell her about my situation, but I don't know how she would response. She likes me too, but I'm sensing that she's starting to understand that I'm hiding something.

Please, help me guys !

Anonymous's picture

Hey Colt,

I was reading your article and I notice it didn't cover the girls who used to sleep around or maybe not sleep around but weren't all that religious but are now religious. A couple of months ago, I met this woman who was religious, she attends church and wanted to wait for the right man to be married to. After reading your article, I found that she's one of the faithful girls so I decided not to have sex with her, but I still show that I'm a sexual man. Every now and then she would go to a nightclub with her sisters and friends to dance on special occasions. Anyways, your articles covers from girls who are religious and girls who used to be religious, but this article didn't cover girls who weren't religious before but now are.

This may be out of topic, but I remember reading an article called "when she says she's done with the hookup scene" and it says that girls "aren't really done with the hookup scene even if they say they are" so there's some contradiction between these two articles because the girls who weren't religious before but now are are somewhat similar to this type of girl. So my question is, based on your experience with religious girls, would a girl who wasn't religious before still isn't the religious type and would be open to hooking up, or does this all change since she's more likely to be connected to the religious community?

-Richard

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