How to Flirt with a Girl | Girls Chase

How to Flirt with a Girl

The other day I got told I was a very good flirt. And, I suppose, I am. Of course, I wasn't always a good flirt... well, perhaps I was always at least a little bit of a flirt.

What's it matter if you know how to flirt with a girl or not? In fact, it matters a good deal. Flirting is how you arouse a girl's interest and make her start imagining the two of you getting together. And once you've gotten her thinking about it – and gotten her thinking about it in a fun, suggestive way – you're a lot closer to taking it out of her and your imagination and into the real world.

In this post, we're going to focus on what most men do wrong when it comes to flirting with women, what the right mindsets are for a man who's a successful flirt, and what talented flirts do. So purse your lips and lower your eyelids a smidge; we're going to get flirty.

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his Mastery Package.


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Johnson's picture

Hi there, I was wondering whether you offered any advertising possibilities on your website? I have a friend who is looking to promote his new website.

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Chase Amante's picture

Howdy Johnson, thanks for thinking of me. I'm looking to keep this site free of third-party advertising and/or endorsements of products I haven't reviewed extensively and can't explicitly endorse, so I'd have to say no, not at the moment. Here's hoping your friend's new website is a success, and best of luck!


Ferik's picture

Hi Chase, I've been reading your articles and putting them in practice. It's very helpful! Thanks.. But now, I need some advice for adolescence..

I've been chasing this girl Vivian I met from church and pretty much do what standard guys do.. I've tried to bring her on a date but only succeeded to go for lunch along with a bunch of friends.. Then she had a major exam coming and we only text and met in church occasionally on sundays.. The texting started to degress as she takes a long time to reply and sometimes may not reply at all.. So I stopped talking to her for some time to let it cool and went out to meet other girls.. After reading some of your articles, I wanted to have another try so I wished her good luck in her exams (via text) and reminded her that she still owed me a movie.. I got her to agree.. I got advice from my friend who's good at talking to girls but he can't teach well.. He only told me she likes cool guys so I should just text her like how her ex's would.. It seemed like it was going well at first but then she did not reply again and left the conversation hanging..

I know its the best idea for movies on a first date, but is there any advice for me to make things better?


JR's picture

Sorry, Ferik, but this girl is not interested in you. You can't convince a woman or girl to like you. If this chick dug you SHE would be texting you and asking about a movie or wishing you good luck on your exam.

That's okay though. There's plenty of girls out there. Move on and learn from this. Maybe you came on to too strong or appeared desperate? Also, don't do what every guy does. That says nothing about you. You have to have something else to offer this girl that's different then all the other guys. Don't chase girls, They should chase you . .. then you seal the deal.

Anonymous's picture

The girl goes to church. Those are the easiest ones to get with if you're devout. They are the most naive and susceptible to social manipulation. You may have lost your chance with her but those types of women, you can't come on strong or they will think you're in it specifically for physical interaction.

Anonymous's picture

WOW thank you so much man
I now realise that I've been flirting with this girl the wrong way my subtlety or implication haha
your site is a great help to a lot of men I am definately going to recommend it to some of my mates

Anon's picture

Awesome awesome awesome is all I can say. I tried just some of the advice and seeing improvement with women instantly. Will definitely keep reading.

Anonymous's picture

I understand the concepts I just need help implementing them

KN's picture

I have been vigorously reading all your articles and it all makes sense. Overall I am a confident/sexy guy and usually have success with getting on dates, but I always drop the ball around the first or second date and the trail goes cold. Lately I have been thinking hard about what I am doing wrong and trying to improve. Your articles are opening my eyes and thank you for that. My question to you is how to you learn to instantly flirt (come up with good responses on the spot)? To be honest I have used some of the examples you talk about on your articles on live discussions with girls and they work well, but I am not sure I can come up with great stuff to flirt and escalate with girls on the spot. Any advice would be great. Thanks.

Nick's picture

The only real way to come up with original flirty stuff is through practice. If you are confident/sexy you have plenty of girls to try new flirtation methods on. Just follow the guidelines when doing so: cooperative flirtation, fun not hurtful, and make sure it has some intrigue (she met your standards *like from the examples chase gave*). Follow the guidelines and then just practice until you do it naturally. It's alright to fail; it's part of the process to improve and hone your skill in flirting.

-Nick (^-^)

Anonymous's picture

Alright, so i've been reading your articles lately and i was wondering how you respond to a girl in a flirty way that is a little cocky. Im not saying that she is in control of the conversation but she is clearly testing the water. I dont want to offend her but she kind of needs to be put in her place. Shes cute but she has a big ego.

Dave's picture

But how do you do it? You just talk to them? I've liked this girl since pre-k and now I'm in 8th grade last year her friend told her that I wanted to go out with her but she was surprised cause we been good freinds like we joke around but when we got to 7grade it died I didn't have a single class with her and when I saw her I said hi or told her jokes
this year I hope I have a class with her but when she told her freind she said she wasn't aloud to date and would just like to stay as friends. But the thing is she wen out with her other friend i'm like that slut! Butvhe was a small Asian an. I'm German/Hispanic and she is Hispanic and white I'm tall big messy hair and a little chubby but you hardly notice it I'm a skater and she is hot and really smart and nice like last year we got into a fight and she told me she didn't like me anymore but then I said sorry and we where ok so that's when I taught she liked me How do I go out with her or ask hercim scaredshe might say no I'm only 13 glasses meat hair no braces and a skater help me!

Spencer's picture

Hey so I've been going after this girl for awhile now, and I'm just starting this new date thing since I'm really shot for being 15 like really short. And I just kind of have up for awhile until I met Ashley we've hung out for a bit now but never really outside of school but we have. We have had good times like I was pissed and sad a day and just went to the library and say she came in and just tyed to chear me up the whole lunch, I'm moving hour away and switching schools and they made a video (her and friends) a truth is video and she looked predy sad and talked about the times we hung out including the library time. And other stuff like that. But she would text me saying "hey" and we would talk for like 2 mssgs then just stop and she would just say hey but never text back after that. So I stop thinking uninterested but then! Of course she would text back saying hit seeming so interested and talking a lot but the it would just go back to not texting me. WTF? Would you please get back to me?

Ps I have autocorrect on excuse mistakes

Joe's picture

This makes good sense. I've used some of these things without really realizing, but I have to admit I've also made some of the overt, boneheaded remarks too. I'll just have to try to plan out where to take the conversation in the future.

I think flipping the tables on the woman and making it as if she's the one pursuing you, that's just golden. I will definitely use that next time the opportunity arises!

Anonymous's picture

i understand most of what u said but how do i flirt with girl's that already know me and not that interested in me but only think of me as a serious friend and could u also give some more examples of flirting please so that i could get used 2 it.

Anonymous's picture

Ive been hanging out with this girl for about 2 months, she about 1 month since i met her i told her i liked her and she tokd me she didnt want to rush things up and that i was the sweetest guy she has ever met, but she said that she wanted to meet me better so i asked her do i still have an oportunity and she said yes but she had to meet me better. So we hung out more and more, her friends told me that sometimes she liked me sometimes she didnt i felt that she liked me, everytime i talked to her at school everybody would look at us with a killer look because everybody knew i liked her, and when we hung out when we met up with people we knew they would ask:are you two together? And she would get blushed and say no. and few days ago i asked her out for dinner and she said sure! But not convincing way, so i told her by fb that if she didnt want to we could hang out she said how she wanted to go just as friends and that she prefered me as a friend and all that stuff and that she loved me too as a friend and that she loved to hang out with me and that she still wanted to hang out with me i said no but i felt she did that because she was so embarassed when everybody looked at us like that, i was o sad i didnt talk to her next day then she asked me by fb how are you? I replied sad you? She said confused if i did the right thing? I replied maybe deep inside of you, you didnt do the right thing? She said wel idk.
What do youthink? I believe i will start hanging out with her again but usin thsese tecniques

Anonymous's picture

I love a girl but dont know that she loves me or not but when she come in front of me she shy but in front of my friend she dont shy what does it mean? Help me guys.

Anonymous's picture

it means she's not interested in you !

SBM's picture

Hey, I have a question in regards to thong example you've used. Personally, I'm a sucker for girls who wear hoodies/sweatshirts. So, if I happen to get into a conversation with a girl about hoodies and how she likes wearing them, should I use the thong example to subtely flirt with her? Like if she says "I love wearing hoodies!" Should I just be like, "hoodies do have a very nice way of accenting accepting he female form", essentially replacing " thong" with "hoodie"? Or should I say something more like "well, nothing beats the soft touch of a hoodie against a woman's skin", but say it in a more "sexy" tone of a voice with "sexy" eye contact? Or what would be some other flirtatious ways to go about discussing this with a woman you like?

Anonymous's picture

I would use the other example, "I love women who love hoodies." Make it funny, girls usually like humor.

JKS's picture

So this girl - who made it clear that she only wanted to be friends- started inviting me over to her house, like a LOT. Asking me to spend the night on the couch. She said she gets paranoid sometimes when alone and sleeps better when I'm in the house. We would go through these flurries where she's texting and calling all the time- sometimes in a flirty way, sometimes in an insecure, lonely way, like "are you going to come over soon???" But then as soon as I try to elevate, she falls back on the "friends only" card- right before she invites me over again. Sometimes we would talk about sex, sometimes we talk about friend zone stuff. Sometimes she would wear revealing/loose clothing. Like loose pajamas with no bra or panties, and lean over to where I could see EVERYTHING. Also, she didn't seem to mind when her friends see my car there in the morning and wonder/ask her/tease her if we're gettin' it on.

Now after so much back and forth and uncertainty, I'm looking elsewhere, and meeting other women for dates and introductions.

But I have to get your opinion: Was she testing me? Maybe thinking about letting me be her boyfriend but then decided no? Or was it just an "extra cozy" friend zone relationship the whole time?

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