Beware of Girls It's Too Easy to Meet! | Girls Chase

Beware of Girls It's Too Easy to Meet!

Chase Amante

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easy to meet girls
Some girls make themselves easy to meet as a part of their dating strategy. But you should beware of these girls yourself... because when you meet them, YOU are the target.

A friend of mine in a country new to him went to an expatriate meeting not long ago. He's a guy who keeps himself attractive and is otherwise good with women, so he's not hard up for dates. He noted how the only truly attractive women at this expat meeting were the wives of male expatriates present. All the single/available women were unattractive, or older; single mothers; and so on.

This called to mind a general mantra I've hewed to over the years: beware of girls it's too easy to meet!

I don't mean girls who are 'easy'... as in "she's so easy to sleep with."

I mean girls it is easy to meet.

The easier it is to meet her, generally, the farther down your batting average you do if you go dating her.

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his One Date System.

GET CHASE’S ONE DATE SYSTEM

Comments

Ajay Lover's picture

How do you break up with a easy-to-meet girl who has given you only nice times and hasn't done anything bad or hurtful that would naturally lead to a break up? How do you verbalize why you're breaking up? Or is there another, better way to do it?

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Ajay-

It's a little different for every relationship. Though a few standard angles usually get the job done here:

If you're not in too deep, easiest is to just tell her "Hey, it's been really great. But I feel like if I let this relationship go on too much further, I'll be leading you on. It's time for us to part ways." Then just stick to your guns when she tries to negotiate.

If you are in deep though you're going to have to go with "You're an amazing gal. You're going to make some guy super happy someday. But this just isn't what I need. And the longer we let this go on the harder it'll be to do what we have to do."

She'll be upset, because it's the rare breakup that isn't upsetting to one or both partner. However, better to nip it in the bud early than to wait until both parties are more invested and it's even harder to do.

Chase

Zanardi's picture

I went a few years ago to some speed dating events and once I entered, I knew I threw away money on the window. The rest is obvious.

Damien1's picture

Thanks for the article Chase! I've noticed this trend as well. There's a weekly language exchange in a bar in my city that is exactly as you describe. Girl quality is definitely lower than in other venues and some of the prettier ones are somewhat damaged there. Also the ratios occasonally are out of whack with a lot of guys there. But yeah it's a great tool for me to get my week started cuz it's in the middle of the week. I use it as a warm-up for the week usually and occasionally you'll get to meet the stunner that somehow ended up there and will maximum go there once or twice. For meeting these girls however I think these venues are great because if a pretty girl ends up there she's usually easy to meet as well because she broke up with her bf or some other reason. So her availability will be higher, even if she won't end up there again, it's a nice screening tool.

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Damien-

Indeed; that's the perfect way to use these sorts of places!

And you can find those diamonds in the rough sometimes.

Just need to be prepared to explain to them what you were doing there, after they decide that sort of place isn't the sort they'd like to frequent... :)

Chase

lux's picture

Very, very interesting article.

I'd feel like adding some different point of view: beautiful and in demand women DO make it easy for high-quality men to meet them.

That's the reason why flight-attendants scramble to serve in first class and why high class venues have lots of beautiful women present.

You can also see it in poorer countries, where more beautiful women attend events, functions, malls and parties with lots of foreign men.

Wealth makes a bigger difference than balls BTW. Plenty of broke-ass and low quality men who take their shots. 

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Lux-

True. However, keep in mind all is relative.

If you are a well put-together man who flies first class, the flight attendants there are lower tier easy-to-meet girls for you... compared to what you could get.

Flight attendants are often good-looking. But rarely stunners. They're also less educated and intelligent than the women successful men have access to. Men in the manosphere like to say intelligence and education don't matter for women... however, studies consistently find, at least with marriage, both sexes marry their intellectual, educational, and economic peers. Were you to meet a wealthy man with a beautiful, intelligent, educated wife he met at random somewhere, and then a wealthy man with a beautiful flight attendant wife he met on a long-haul flight, you'd likely view those as quite different. Or at least I would. I realize some guys view flight attendants as status boosters to date (for some reason. They're not hard to meet at all if you frequent bars popular with flight crew).

Beautiful women are more likely to attend malls, functions, etc., where more successful foreign men (or more successful local men) are in higher attendance, this is very true! This is a way to raise their availability as well. It's on the spectrum, somewhere between "Go somewhere I will just bump into men left and right" vs. "Stay in and never go out except to buy groceries and work." A woman's choice of profession may have an element of this... women who pursue professional careers often do so in small or large part because they want access to professional men. You can look at all sorts of activities women pursue and ask yourself "How far out of her way has she gone to make herself available to the men she'd like to meet?"

The general rule applies across all scenarios: the more out-of-her-way she's gone to make herself more available, the more likely she is to be an 'easy-to-meet girl'.

Chase

lux's picture

True, very good comment.

 

What I maintain is that smart women looking to settle, independent of quality, should adopt a strategy that makes it easy for them to meet high quality men so they can settle in their prime.

High quality men are busy, and since there is a shortage of high quality men for high quality women today, for women it's like a game of musical chairs: the longer they wait, the worst off their odds.

Like you say, there is always a trade-off, and there is no 1:1 correlation between quality and "difficulty to meet". The further up the curve you go in "making it difficult to meet me".

The higher quality females simply tend to make themselves more available to different kind of men. 

P.S.: awesome new commenting system, it rocks (or at least new since I last popped in :) !

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Lux-

Absolutely, people will do things to up their odds to meet mates of the quality they think they should be able to get. Beautiful, quality women are no exception. If you think of a woman who's absolutely top tier... say she is:

  • Facially beautiful
  • Physically perfect (body)
  • Highly intelligent
  • Has an appealing personality
  • Is feminine
  • Pick a few other traits you like... tall, athletic, confident, demure, etc.

She will do things that put her in proximity with the men she wants. A beautiful/intelligent girl, for instance, may seek a career in a top firm, where she'll be one of comparatively fewer women, surrounded by more top tier men (giving her the pick of the litter). She might attend some talks given by intelligista and top CEOs, and hope to do a little networking or pick up the eye of some top guy there.

However, she probably won't, for instance, go to a bunch of yacht parties in Monaco, even though she could meet plenty of billionaires she'd otherwise have no access to doing this... and even though that may well be a successful strategy. She won't scrap her corporate job to become an airline pilot, where she can meet a wider variety of top tier guys -- and probably more higher-up guys (pun not intended; I just noticed it while skimming this comment over before posting) -- than what she meets at her job. She doesn't spend all her time in Las Vegas at the top clubs schmoozing with the high rollers.

There are reasons for this. Those other avenues pursued by other women give them access to greater quantities of potential high quality mates, at lower commitment odds. They also give her a lot less time to actively vet the men she wants to date before she has to decide whether to put out for them (which she'll have to do to keep them in those environments, usually) or not. In the workplace, there are fewer ultra wealthy guys, but she has more time to evaluate them for genuine mate quality and odds of commitment. With super rich guys, while wealth is attractive, it's not a guaranteed indicator that a man actually has good genes... or will commit to her (and not one of the 100 other women vying for him) if he does.

The corporate route is just one example. There are plenty of other things beautiful/intelligent/etc. women can do beside pursue a corporate career. They can get into modeling and use their savviness to climb to the upper echelons of the modeling world. Or do the same in acting. They can become painters or sculptors and use their beauty and art to charm their way into some lower tier galleries, where they can meet a top tier guy (or trade sexual favors to get into the better galleries... which as I understand it is usually what you have to do if you want your art there). They can start their own businesses (purses, fashion, etc.). They can develop social media channels that bring them tons of followers (and tons of male suitors -- some of whom will be of pretty okay quality). And so on, and so forth.

However, high quality women tend more toward means of availability that favor their ability to evaluate the mate quality and commitment odds of decent-enough prospective mates, rather than means of availability that maximize their exposure to prospective mates... because maximum exposure typically goes hand-in-hand with reduced ability to vet, and women very much care about vetting. If she has a way to access high caliber men while also being able to vet them over time, a woman will choose that way, and eschew other ways that lack that ability to properly evaluate her mate choices, even if those other ways give her more (but less vet-able) choices.

Thus, most higher quality women are overall less available to most men than average... because they tend to concentrate their efforts on a few small pools of high quality men where they can better vet their mating options.

(however, most of them will still occasionally dabble with other things: "Let's try clubbing and see if there's anyone worth meeting there" or "This cute guy approached me on the street. Well, what the hell, let's agree to the date and see what happens" -- you can still meet them, they're just typically lower availability overall, even for most of the types of men they'd ideally like to meet)

Glad you find the new commenting system good! (we still have a few more upgrades coming to it a little later, too)

Chase

Zanardi's picture

Very good comment, Chase. Many insights here. Thank you.

Ryan's picture

Would you say that this is why a lot of foreign girls warm up quickly to men (from wealthier nations) visiting their country?

I notice this a lot when traveling to Asia, gorgeous & fairly intelligent girls, warming up a bit more quickly to me. Some of these girls are higher caliber in their country, educated with good jobs, and actually warm up quicker (maybe because they see more potential) than other attractive less educated girls in these countries.

lux's picture

Absolutely

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