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Sex

Articles about sex.

When to Have Sex with a New Girl

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

How Long Should You Wait to Have Sex
How long you wait to have sex is important no matter the type of relationship you want, be it casual, serious, short or long term. So, what’s too fast and too slow?

How long should you wait to have sex? A month? A week? Seven minutes? Most guys would probably love to be able to have sex with a girl in seven minutes but, in reality, they’d most likely get bored eventually, due to a lack of challenge.

You can learn how to have sex very quickly – but should you? Do you even want to? If you want to have a quick one-night stand, the faster, the better.

But if you want to see a girl again, it might be better to stretch things out and get to know her a bit.

Either way, never ask her how long you should wait to have sex. She doesn’t know, and it’s just going to be awkward for both of you to ask something like that.

As a dating coach, I advise my clients to have sex as quickly as possible, because I’ve seen way more girls lost from moving too slowly than moving too fast. I’ll explain why that is in this post.

That said, yes, I’m also a pickup artist, and so are most contributors on this site. But we’re all dating coaches who understand that not everyone is keen on the “pickup” mentality when it comes to dating, and that’s totally cool.

Everyone has different woman goals, so we are here, first and foremost, to help you get what you want, no matter what your goals may be, short or long term.

The following advice... is for everyone.

What to Do When She Says "It's Too Fast" and Wants to Leave

Chase Amante's picture

it's too fast for me
You tried to take her to bed, only for her to tell you "It's too fast for me." Your solution: 5 options that can smooth things out and get her to stay.

You ran the courtship (up until now) to perfection. Sparks flew when you talked to her. She laughed at your jokes (and you were wittier than usual). You remembered to touch, and touched her well. You took the lead and led her home.

Everything went great -- till a moment ago. Then as you tried to kiss her, she distanced herself from you. She told you "It's too fast for me."

You tried to persist; she said "I think I should go."

What do you do? Deep within your gut, you know if she leaves, she's gone. Your lizard brain knows what happens when you come this close then fail to close the deal. Yet you also freeze up with fear: you live in a paranoid feminist society. Many women now view male persistence as all but analogous to assault. The last thing you want to be is pushy... especially while alone with a woman you're only just getting to know.

Must you surrender? Must you let her go... say goodbye to a happy coupling never to be? Cast her into the wilderness to find a man less desirable than you, less wonderful than you, who will please her less than you?

Seems like a tragedy, doesn't it? It shouldn't have to end on so ignominious a turn.

And while there's no 100% way to change a girl's mind as she's on her way out, there are a few things you can try. But first you must understand why, when things had gone so well to that point, she suddenly balked.

Tactics Tuesdays: In the Bedroom, Escalate 10% Slower Than She Wants

Chase Amante's picture

escalate 10% slower
Want an easy way to make a girl want it more in the bedroom? Make your physical escalation go 10% slower than she wants it to go.

One of the biggest aspects of sexual enjoyment is not the actual sex itself.

During the act itself, you might use good technique and be passionate. These things help up a woman's enjoyment (and yours).

But like a young child biding his time until Christmas, it is the anticipation that heightens her enjoyment of the experience most. Good sex (like a good Christmas) is magnitudes better with proper buildup and anticipation before it.

How do you build all that anticipation in her? I talked about some ways in an article some years back: "How to Turn a Girl On: 3 Tiers of Sexual Excitement."

Today I'll talk about another way: escalating just slightly slower than she wants you to.

Are Casual Hookups Worse Than Relationship Sex?

Hector Castillo's picture

casual hookup vs relationship sex
Most experienced guys will agree that relationship sex is better than casual hookups. But that’s not to say you should limit yourself to one or the other.

I’ve read and heard many, many, many times that sex in a relationship is better than casual sex.

You’ll see it said in most media – be it television, movies, books, or on social feeds – that being a player and having lots of casual sex is empty and unfulfilling.

While there is some truth to this sentiment, I want to dispel some of the negative connotations surrounding casual sex.

Firstly, realize some possible motivations behind the negativity.

If a man says that casual sex is empty and relationship sex is fulfilling, he will usually fall under one of a few categories.

He is most likely a guy who doesn’t get laid a lot, is envious of those who do, and tries to shame them. To dissuade other men from banging lots of girls, he will advise against casual sex. He will poison the lifestyle with claims that it robs you of meaningful connections and is a waste of time. He’ll say that you shouldn’t disrespect women by seeing them as sex objects.

This guy is wrong for reasons you already are aware of – the pursuit of women is a worthy one. There are higher goals than chasing pussy, but it’s something almost every man needs to learn, at least to a degree.

There are also women who aren’t that competitive in the dating market, so they look to undermine men – either consciously or unconsciously – from pursuing other women during their sexual adventures. Ironically, this crusade against casual sex rarely stops the protesting women themselves from engaging in it.

Occasionally, you’ll hear this from a conservative, high-value girl, but it’s usually her reacting to a specific conversation rather than going out of her way to denounce casual sex. And don’t forget about the girl who just got pumped and screwed by some guy – she’s going to cry about casual sex being lame, but the real issue is she’s mad that the guy she gave it up for didn’t want more.

Men who are experienced but not expressing themselves clearly or are currently in a down state might also criticize the player lifestyle. It generally doesn’t come from a bad place and is usually the most informative of the “casual sex is inferior to relationship sex” arguments, but one should take pause when reading or listening to such criticism.

There is an important nuance when considering whether casual hookups are inferior to relationship sex.

How to Stop Premature Ejaculation – Proven Tips from a Pickup Artist

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

premature ejaculation
A perk of good game is having sex with beautiful women. And being able to last for more than a few thrusts makes it all the sweeter – for everyone involved.

Hey, guys.

Today I will take a step away from pickup theory and instead discuss a subject related to male sexuality: premature ejaculation.

The reason I got caught up in this subject is a phone call I received the other night from a guy who is starting to pull quite often. Now that he’s started pulling hotter girls, he’s becoming frustrated that he only gets to enjoy them for a few minutes.

It sucks putting in the work just to burst your load after five minutes… or less. He wanted advice regarding this issue, and the advice I provided is the same as what you will read here.

Sometimes, you get easy lays and it goes smoothly. Sometimes, it’s hard, and you must jump through a lot of hoops. At times, you bang really hot chicks, sometimes less hot. Hopefully, you don’t bang ugly girls too often – it happens to us all – but no matter who we’re screwing, we always want to be in control of when we ejaculate.

I won’t make a guide sharing all the techniques that are already discussed elsewhere on the web, especially not the ones you’re most likely not going to use anyway. How many of you have been doing daily kegel exercises to strengthen your PC muscle and thus withhold longer? Probably very few – although it does work against premature ejaculation!

Rather, what I want to discuss is what I do when I’m with a girl. I don’t care about the sciences behind it or what some virgin doctor or scientist says. I care more about what I and other men have experienced. The techniques I’m about to share work for me and others.

Let’s get on with it.

Fixing Your Woman's Bad Behavior with Sex

Chase Amante's picture

fix bad behavior with sex
Want the most enjoyable way to fix a girlfriend’s bad behavior? Do it with sex! However, you must be careful to do this the RIGHT way…

I was too late with yesterday’s Recommended Reading list to make Tactics Tuesdays this week. But we’ll still cover a useful tactic for your relationships regardless.

Today’s tactic focuses on fixing a female partner’s behavioral problem through a mix of calling a problem out both before and during (good, but not great) sex.

This is an ‘intermediate’ level tactic and up. I don’t suggest it for beginners... you need to be fairly dominant already with women to pull it off, and you need fairly solid social calibration/timing. If you’re still building your confidence around women, save this tactic for once you’ve built up more.

You’ll also want to save this for your more girlfriend-level relationships. Using it with friends with benefits is too much; while it’s a great technique for behavior-shaping, it also communicates to the girl that you are really looking out for her, and this is a bit too much for casual relationships.

The gist of the technique is you will tell a girl to knock off a bad behavior... then begin sex with her... then, when the sex is good (but not before then), you’ll tell her in a dominant-yet-protective way that you want her to cut off the behavior and how it is for her own good.

Before we get to the technique though, we need to talk about one aspect of it.

Match Your Ejaculation to Her Climax, and Make Her Fall in Love

Chase Amante's picture

timed ejaculation
Simultaneous orgasm is a major booster to sexual satisfaction and in-love feelings. An easy way to make her feel more in-love: cum in her at the same time she cums.

Know one of the easiest ways to make a woman fall completely in love with you?

Ejaculate in her right as she climaxes.

I had a girlfriend I hadn’t finished inside of for a while. She was paranoid about getting pregnant. Either I’d finish in her mouth or on her belly or (on rare occasions) in a condom inside her... which are always weaker orgasms for me because condoms just aren’t any fun. The sex through all this was still good; however, it was not phenomenal.

Then at one point I yielded to my passions and ejaculated in her as she climaxed (then had to reassure her for a few minutes after “Don’t worry, you’re not going to get pregnant, you’re not ovulating...”). She got super flirty, happy, and horny for me – much more visibly than usual. She came over again that night; more great sex, but she was still afraid of me finishing in her. So after I gave her a few orgasms from vaginal sex I switched her to anal. I had her bring her knees up into the anal sex orgasm position, and very soon she had a thunderous climax and I finished in her in the midst of her cumming.

She was even hornier and flirtier the next time I saw her, with those huge beaming smiles women only give you when they are thinking about really good sex. She told me “I don’t know why I am so horny all of a sudden!”

But I knew. Incidentally, that next time in bed, I did not match my ejaculation to her climax... and her extreme horniness disappeared.

Matching ejaculations to women’s orgasms has been something I’ve done pretty much forever. I’ve had girlfriends remark on it in wonder: “We always finish at the same time!” And when I’ve asked, they’ve claimed it hasn’t happened for them with any other guy.

I never understood why more men don’t do this. It’s the single greatest, easiest, and most fun way to make women obsessed with your cock and head-over-heels in-love with you.

Yet almost no guy (if the women I’ve talked to about it are to be believed) does it. (and yes, it does work with condoms... though of course going bareback always adds a dimension to sex that isn’t otherwise there)

Tactics Tuesdays: Orgasm Anchoring

Chase Amante's picture

orgasm anchoring
You can train a woman to do and enjoy something – or to cut that something out – with a simple (but mighty) operant conditioning tactic called “orgasm anchoring.”

Have you got something you’d like a girl to do, but she isn’t that excited about? Anchor it with orgasms!

Or maybe there’s something she does, and you’d like her to cut it out? Anchor it with orgasms!

This article presumes you’re adept at making women climax from sexual intercourse already. And ideally, that you’re able to string together multiple vaginal orgasms in her. If you’re not yet, or you’ve got a girl who’s sexually closed off and hasn’t learned to cum yet (or to cum easily / multiple times in a row), give these two articles a gander:

Also, you should probably have a decent grasp of how anchoring works. I’ll give you a quick overview, but I suggest you check out my full article on it here:

That discussed, let’s talk about how to make women you’re seeing do what you’d like them to do... with orgasms.

Where to Touch on Her Body Before You Get to Foreplay

Chase Amante's picture

touch pre-foreplay
What do you do when you get a girl who will let you touch her and cuddle with her, but not touch her breasts, buttocks, or crotch? You touch her other places... in sexy ways.

You’ve got a girl back at your place, making out with you, yet she’s resistant to sex. “We shouldn’t do this,” she tells you. “I have to get going.” Et cetera. You’ve heard it all before.

Do you want to plow ahead? Just keep trying? That can work. You won’t always have the drive for it though.

Here’s the deal: so long as she’s there, spending time with you in an intimate situation, you are still able to touch her and do things to turn her on, even if she yanks your hand off her crotch or won’t let you get her shirt off. There are more things you can do, and they seem harmless enough she will let you do them. And as you do them, she’ll get more and more turned on – and after you’ve done them for a while, those shirts, bras, pants, and panties come flying off.

I’m not going to go into a full discussion of foreplay today. You can read my articles on how to get a girl in bed and physical escalation once she’s in bed for more on that. You might also want to read our articles about giving women cunnlingus if you need details on that.

Today we’re just going to talk about places you can touch and ways to touch that turn girls on, without being full-on erogenous zone foreplay.

The 8 Types of Orgasm Routine

Alek Rolstad's picture

8 types of orgasm
There are 8 kinds of orgasm a woman can experience. And with this routine, you can communicate your sexual expertise to her – and leave her dripping to hook up with you.

Hey, guys! Today I will post a technique that I have been using since 2009! And it is probably my most successful technique. It’s a real gem, folks! Not only that, but many other skilled seducers I know of have gotten laid with this exact technique over the past year. It truly is a powerhouse.

This will be a long post, but not because there’s too much to remember. I really want to give you every detail and cover the theoretical background and potential pitfalls (and how to avoid them). I’ve also included some good examples as well as good sex talk transitions you can use. Do not get freaked out. That said, this post is best fit for intermediate to advanced seducers. Depending on your level, I will share variations of this technique. I will also suggest, for those of you who are truly advanced, ways you can further spice it up.

Not too long ago, I shared a very detailed report on the forums.

In that thread, a poster named “yash” made the following request:

Could you go more in detail on The 8 Types of Orgasms? I don't think I've seen an article on that ever on the main site, plus I haven't seen it in the boards, but I would love to know the process for how to pull each one of them off.

Yash is right. I haven’t shared it on the main site, which is why I will do it now. Last time I posted it was on mASF in 2010 (the pickup forum back in the day where all the legends were made – a place that no longer exists). So yeah, a revisited version is in order.

The routine (or gambit) was one of my first sex-talk routines, and it is still one of my favorites. When I discovered and wrote down my theory on sexual prizing, I had to make a routine based on it. That was the “8 Types of Orgasm” routine. I have of course made many gambits based on the concept of sexual prizing, but this is the classic version.

Even though I made it when I was 16, it truly rocked my world. Girls would go easily from orange to green… and not just green… I mean they’d go straight luck-o’-the-Irish chartreuse! I used it 2 weekends ago, first on Thursday with a super-hot, introverted, 20-year-old girl who did not show me much attention at first. But she lighted right up after this routine. I used it again Saturday as a 1-shot-1-kill on a 21-year-old chick who literally asked me to take her home right away.

I am about to share something juicy.

First things first. I do not consider this technique super advanced, as I pulled it off successfully when I was intermediate (still with a few failures, which you will not experience that much if you are an advanced player – but again, failures are what transform you into a calibrated seduction master).

With that in mind, let us get on with it.