Where to Find an Amazing Woman: 20 Surprising Places

Nick-

I like it - that's a cool and cute way of getting her to come join you. When I do that, I usually just talk to them until they decide they're going to stick around, and move their stuff over on their own - but sometimes that takes a while, and there's a little awkwardness and uncertainty there. The playful "go and get your stuff!" handles that nicely, and creates a very "us" vibe right from the start. Solid move; I'll adopt that one for use.

On chase frames vs. calling a girl's bluff - the way I read that comment, I got the impression the author planned to tell a girl something like, "We both know you like me; no sense hiding it," or, "Come on - I can tell you like me." Assuming I read his intentions right (and I might not have; maybe he meant he'd say something else), that's more matter-of-fact, and puts pressure on the girl to either buckle or resist. If she buckles and says, "Yes... I do," then you are very much in (so long as you move fast from there on out; she'll go into auto-rejection if not), but especially if you're dealing with women who are experienced with men / aren't SUPER sold on you, you'll get a, "What makes you say THAT?" or a "Nope, you must've read wrong," which shuts everything down.

A chase frame, on the other hand, is said in jest, and then moved on from before she has a chance to properly respond or shoot it down. e.g., she'd say, "I LOVE Robert Downey, Jr.," and you'd say, "I think you just love gorgeous men in general," and she'd say, "True," and you'd say, "I mean, that's why you're here with me today, isn't it?" and then while she was still processing that comment and deciding if it was a joke to be laughed at or a comment to be taken seriously, you'd say, "So what'd you think of the new Iron Man movie?" and she'd forget about the remark and be on to answering that.

Chase

Greg-

Yeah, I hear that's a good one too. I didn't think of it when writing this one up (mainly because it's been quite a while since I've spent much time in churches), but I've had friends who've reported meeting great gals in church.

One buddy of mine started heading to a large non-denominational church in SoCal because it was almost entirely attended by people under 35 or so, with lots of beautiful women. Made it significantly easier to meet a girl than the standard church crowd, which has some young beauties mixed in with a lot of older folk.

Some churches hold singles events, or other events that young people attend as well, so that there are other outlets within the church besides just the service at which to meet other eligible members of the local church community.

Chase

Wes-

On classrooms, you need to follow what those other guys you're seeing are doing - spot a girl you like the looks of, and position yourself near her on the first day and get into conversation. Before you pick a seat, scan the room and see what girls look your way and act flirting, and sit near one of them so you aren't wasting the opportunity. Gauge your girl's interest when you talk to her, and if she isn't a hit, pick a different girl to sit next to the next class. During the first few classes there's a bit too much going on for anyone to really track what you're doing or whom you're talking to.

Once you've found a girl, just get to know her and ask her out. Unfortunately, classrooms aren't usually all that conducive to "working the room" and meeting every girl there. You'll tend to want to do this; but then you'll find you don't get ANY of the girls. Focus on getting ONE first, and if you want to meet more girls after that you can start to figure it out from there.

At work, just be flirty - but be careful about mixing work with pleasure. This doesn't always work so well. I might rather advise that you turn these girls into friends, and hang out with them and party with them and meet THEIR friends, so you won't have drama at work.

As for your friend - it's very hard (sometimes impossible) to teach people who aren't interested in being taught by you. Sometimes your close friends are the hardest ones to teach, because they view you as "friend," not "teacher" or "mentor." All you can do is tell him what not to do: "Hey man, look, when I'm talking to a girl, you've got to just chill and be cool until I bring you in. When I bring you in, if she has a friend, talk to the friend. If it's just the one girl, be cool, talk to her for a few minutes, but remember that she's my girl and your job there is to make me look like I have cool friends and then get back out of the picture and let me get to it, just as I'd do for you. Savvy?"

If he still doesn't get it... well, then it's just time for a new wingman. Some guys just can't understand why you can't pick up a girl while they STAND RIGHT THERE. Obviously, those guys aren't the ones you want winging you ;)

Chase

Anon-

They can - it's either "cute" or "creepy."

If the former, it's not a good cute... more a patronizing, asexual kind of cute. More akin to, "Aww, there's a little puppy with giant eyes nuzzling a kitty cat! How cute!" than to, "Whoa, that hunk of a man has the meanest six pack I've ever laid eyes on... he's CUTE."

If it's creepy, it's just creepy, though if she has some familiarity with you and you're a reasonably normal guy, it's probably "aww, how cute" and not "eew, how creepy."

Chase

Tornado-

Good to hear you're making progress, although of course being hung up on a girl you haven't slept with yet is no good! Telling her you can't see her any more because you have feelings for her but it isn't going anywhere is good if you can stick to it, though (and better if you can then go get together with another girl - the few girls I've told this to have started chasing me pretty hard once they saw me with other women, although at that point I'd completely lost interest in them).

On sarcasm - it is effective, though not like the way laid out there. That sarcasm comes across as both 1.) bitter and 2.) value-inflating; it sounds like the guy is admitting defeat and telling her she's just beautiful / brilliant, and wishing he was as good as her.

Instead, you want to use sarcasm that jabs at her in a fun way, without giving her the compliments she's seeking with those statements thrown out there.

That'd look like this:

Her: I think I'm gaining weight.

You: You mean that was you making the water in my cup ripple with your footsteps?

and

Her: The exam's coming up. I'm worried.

You: Really? And here I thought you were giving the professor "extra credit."

Chase

Dougie-

I wouldn't worry about it, no. If you're young, you'll get some women that object: "Aren't you a little young?" same as what older guys run into: "Aren't you a little old to be...?" But then you'll meet women who don't object an ounce, and are just excited to meet you. Think of the ones who act weird or don't want to talk to you as the obstacles you need to jump over to find the women who are interested.

Also - it probably helps to go somewhere that girls closer to your age congregate. Shopping malls can be very good for this; I've occasionally met girls in their mid-teens in bookstores, too (always a surprise to find out that girl you're chatting with is 16, though; no wonder she looked so cute and young!).

In some areas, I've noticed a lot of teen girls hang out around certain movie theaters / cineplexes at night and on the weekends in the evening; they're often with groups of friends, but if you take a couple of buddies, perhaps you can strike up some conversation with several of the girl groups.

Chase

Wolf-

Yes, that'll happen if you seem like a really outstanding quality guy and there aren't other things there to disqualify you from boyfriend consideration.

I'll do an article on recognizing where you stand with a girl. Meantime, here's one on NOT ending up a boyfriend candidate: Telling Women You're NOT Boyfriend Material.

On how to move date-wise as a boyfriend candidate: what you want to do is focus on compressing a lot of different, smaller dates into a shorter period of time. e.g., do 3 or 4 dates in a 2 week period, and sleep with her on the last of these dates. Girls who want you as a boyfriend impose "logical rules" on the relationship progression, to stop themselves from sleeping with you too quickly and potentially losing you. However, most women's rules rely on number of dates rather than span of time passed; so, a girl will have a rule like, "I will not sleep with a man until the third date at MINIMUM, unless I just don't care about him and only want him for sex."

So, you just have those 3 dates in as short a time as possible.

Chase

Forever-

To be honest, I never approach girls with parents because it's just too low percentage, and you immediately end up deep in boyfriend land / possible husband land because the parent is always going to be asking her, "So how is that NICE young man you met the other day?" and she's forced to be on her best behavior and take things s-l-o-w... she may even come to resent you for the pressure her parents put on her if they like you, or start seeing you as "the one my parents want me to date" rather than the wild bad boy her parents would go spastic over if they knew she was seeing.

That said, if you're willing to forge ahead despite the perils, I'd probably suggest gradually trying to get some conversation going with her, and if the father comes by and seems to want to talk to you, chat a bit with him as well and make a good impression. Again, that's speculation - this is not my domain, personally. I'd certainly suggest checking out the general tips on gym pickup, too.

Chase

Balla-

Dance floor's a do-or-die medium. Women are a lot more likely to reject you if you approach from the side or behind than the front (it's startling, and shows a lack of social awareness; e.g., imagine you're on the dance floor, and someone grabs you from behind suddenly, etc.), and aside from that it's largely about looks, presence, and dancing. If you have great looks, great dance moves, or look like you're having a BLAST... or if she's seen you with other attractive women... she'll usually dance with you.

Hair-wise, I'd probably try a short, trim hairstyle, yeah. Fly clothes are better than not (see the article on fashion for men). And learning fundamentals... it's take one or two things at a time (e.g., walk or voice) and focus on it until you've got it - usually takes 30 to 60 days to learn new habits around these and unlearn old bad ones.

Travel - I had money saved up when I started, and was able to get some businesses up and running that worked well enough, GC included. At this point I'm location independent - all my money is made online, and I work whatever hours I want, so it doesn't matter where I am or when I work. However, you can do freelancing (I have friends who make money doing work on oDesk and similar sites) - there are plenty of how-to guides for making money that way - or you can teach English overseas - I have friends who've done this too. There are English teaching jobs in nearly every non-native English-speaking country, and there's plenty of freelance work available if you know how to write, edit, code, design, or do anything else useful to business owners. And if you don't - you can always teach yourself. Ruby on Rails is a particularly hot programming language, takes 3 or 4 months to learn, and with a little experience under your belt (say, Hacker School for 3 months, and half a year on a start up) you can be making $100 to $200 an hour as a freelance consultant and live wherever you want.

Plenty of options out there if you know where to look.

Chase