Where to Find an Amazing Woman: 20 Surprising Places | Girls Chase

Where to Find an Amazing Woman: 20 Surprising Places

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where to find a womanSomething I'm being asked lately is where to find a woman who checks off every box on your list. Where do you meet those truly amazing women who are everything you want and more?

You know - a girl who isn't just good... she's great:

Her hair flows perfectly down her neck in gorgeous locks.

Her eyes sparkle with intelligence and energy.

Her perfume captures your attention and waters your mouth.

Her smile makes your heart beat faster and a flush come rushing to your cheeks.

Her personality oozes warmth, curiosity, and zest for life.

Her mind is sharp, and she knows what she wants (and what you want, too).

You actually feel nervous around her. You! Who never gets nervous around anyone!

Where do you find a woman like this? It's not like she's just out walking around waiting to be plucked off the street... is she?


where to find a woman

Something in the way of most men ever getting these dream girls for themselves is that the majority of people THINK they know what they want but don't LISTEN to what they ACTUALLY want.

How many times have you seen a girl and suddenly gotten that feeling that said, "Wow - I HAVE to meet that girl. She's everything I want!"

... and then gone on to ignore this feeling, giving yourself an excuse to not say anything, reasoning to yourself that it probably wouldn't have gone anywhere anyway?

How often have the women you ended up with instead been women you didn't get this feeling for, and were never quite crazy about or a perfect match for?

In a study of homebuyers, the homebuyers who bought homes according to their gut instincts (the homes that "felt right") were much happier with their purchases 10 years later than the homebuyers who bought homes based on a methodical, logical analysis of the facts, with no mind paid to that gut instinct.

Why? Because, as it turns out, your subconscious mind processes significantly more information about the world around you and the objects within it than your conscious mind is even aware exists.

Consciousness is a resource-heavy brain program that quickly becomes overwhelmed when presented with too much information. For this reason, the subconscious comes to the rescue by automating most processes - e.g., walking, breathing, typing, driving, catching baseballs, deciding what flavor of ice cream you feel like eating for dessert.

All these are largely automated processes.

Much of your decision making is done subconsciously too - but your conscious mind can choose to overrule these decisions.

A subconscious decision is that feeling you get in the pit of your stomach. It's the one where you suddenly get a bad feeling about something - or you get really excited out of virtually nowhere.

And these feelings can be tremendously useful - when you listen to them.


Your Subconscious is Here to Help

When you're out and about somewhere - anywhere - and you see a pretty girl and your heart suddenly starts pounding and you know, know that you have to meet her... that's your subconscious telling you it's analyzed all kinds of little details about her already and found her a match.

In my experience, these kinds of "love at first sight" moments are invariably mutual - when you feel that way toward a girl, and really feel it, not just get nervous, but get really excited, too - she nearly always feels and reacts the same way toward you.

where to find a woman

Your subconscious mind is not some alien intelligence inhabiting its own domain inside your cranium. Your subconscious is you - and it's trying to alert you, with these little gut feelings, to things it's identified as good, bad, or worth investigating for you.

In the fact-centric, data-crazy, stimulation-heavy environment of the modern world, the people who consistently hit it out of the park on decision making are not necessarily the most informed, but rather the ones who listen to that little voice the most faithfully.

That little voice is processing far more information about the environment - and all those beautiful women you're meeting within it - than your nose-in-the-air conscious mind is even aware exists.


No Excuses

Every girlfriend I've ever had has been a girl I saw and said to myself, "Whoa."

If I wasn't excited, nervous, intrigued, and juiced on first seeing her, she never made it into consideration for a girlfriend role with me. I just aren't interested in having her for that.

And each girlfriend I've had has been amazing. They've all been beautiful; they've all been smart. They've all had fantastic, one-in-a-million personalities. I've had great relationships with every single one of them, and have grown as a person with them, and they've grown with me. We've been right for each other, every time.

If you give yourself excuses and bow out when those gut feelings start kicking in, it doesn't matter if you know where to find a woman who is all that you want... because you'll never actually go meet her.

We're going to talk about where you can find amazing women now... where you can actually run into these women of your dreams.

But if you aren't listening to your gut, if you won't approach a girl when you see her, if you're letting her walk off without asking her out and getting her phone number, it doesn't matter HOW many amazing women you see... because you won't actually be meeting any of them.

Want to meet the girl of your dreams? Then your excuses are no good.

When you see her, you must say "hi"!


where to find a woman

So where do you find a woman who's truly amazing?

The answer is: anywhere your kind of women congregate.

There is no magic solution for this - there's nowhere I can tell you to go where all the women flock to to stand around and wait for male suitors to come along and pluck them from obscurity, into the arms of destiny.

Instead, you've got to meet them out-and-about - looking for you or not.

We'll go a good bit more in-depth here than we did in "Top 10 Places to Meet Girls" - in this article, we're going to subdivide your options into categories that are easier to get your head around, and talk about exactly what your strategy will be for meeting women in each one.

Here goes.


10 Places with Instant Social Context

"Social context" is the term for a place where you automatically have a reason for talking to a girl. e.g., no real excuse is needed - if you walk up and say "hi," that's normal for there.

The nice thing about places with social context is that the context of the place makes it easier and more natural to slip into conversations - that is, at least in part, what people do there.

On the downside, you'll tend to have more competition (even if that competition isn't necessarily all that fierce), and you don't get quite as many bonus points for summoning the courage to say hello - after all, that is what people do here anyway.


#1: The Classroom

Remember those old college days? Or maybe you're still in college. Either way, you know how easy it is to strike up a conversation with a girl in class - all you've got to do is ask her what she thinks of the professor, or the latest homework assignment, or how she did on that awful test you had last week.

Then make a witty comment about it, and you're in:

You: How'd you do on that test last week?

Her: Ugh... I don't think I did all that well.

You: I know. If I pass this one, I'll consider that a testament to my powers of random answer picking.

where to find a woman

The most important part of meeting girls in class? Make sure you're sitting next to someone pretty. Especially before everyone settles into his or her seats for the semester... fortunately, seating is normally pretty fluid the first couple of classes. Ample time to scope out the landscape... and pick the prettiest girl to alight next to.

If you're not still in university, never fear: adult learning classes can still pack in the beauties, and usually aren't too expensive. Just make sure to pick a cute-girl-friendly course, like Spanish 101 or Acting or Tennis, and make sure it's held on a college campus, where possible. You probably won't meet too many stunners in an Engineering or Computer Science class, so pick wisely! If possible, audit first - then commit. Pick something where you'll learn something interesting, of course... but don't get too committed if there aren't any eligible bachelorettes that meet your requirements!

And once you've found a girl to get to know? Follow these instructions: "Cute Girls in Class? Stop Flirting and Start DATING."


#2: The Office

The office is the marketplace of the modern age. It's where you hang out, spend your day, chat with peers, and meet likeminded people. It's also pretty common to meet a compatible someone there, too.

Office romances are potentially sticky in some ways, but that doesn't stop people from having them: 1 out of 3 men and women have had a sexual relationship with a coworker, although only about 1 in 4 of those relationships turn into anything substantial.

where to find a woman

The office has a few advantages for putting you in touch with women you'll click with:

  • You get plenty of proximity, which allows more time for attraction to build slower and more deeply than in the rushed settings of many other environments

  • You get a chance to show off some of your traits and assets that might not be as visible in a more rapidly paced interaction (intelligence, resourcefulness, etc.)

  • You'll be working with women of roughly your same educational and socioeconomic background, which means a much better chance you click than with a random stranger off the street

So how do you go from flirting at work to dating the girl of your dreams?

Simple - you invite her to something fun over the weekend, or steal away with her to grab a quick bite after work.

It's just regular old dating after that.


#3: The Social Club

This can be anything from an alumni group you participate in for your alma mater to a likeminded group of people, like Toastmasters or one of the many private social clubs that many cities have to offer (some for wealthy individuals, some just for young professionals). These groups typically have regular meetings and goings on; all you need to do is attend, and pick a spot near an attractive young lady.

Social clubs can make finding suitable partners a good bit easier, because, like the office environment, people there will tend to be of similar educational and socioeconomic backgrounds to you and have shared interests. However, unlike work, people are exclusively at social clubs to socialize - and, quite frequently, prospect for mates.

where to find a woman

You don't see a whole lot of couples at these kinds of places now, do you?

So get hobnobbing and mingling when you go, and see whom you can meet. You may find you easily meet a gal you really click with.


#4: The Activity Group

This includes everything from wine tasting group tours to surf clubs to tennis clubs to language-learning groups to everything else in between. Many of these you can find via Meetup.com, but there are plenty others that have their own websites or you may find listed in the classifieds... or may not be listed at all, and you'll need a friend to invite you to.

Upsides of activity groups:

  • People all tend to be quite down-to-Earth / approachable
  • Attendees are invariably singles; like social clubs, couples rarely go
  • These groups can sometimes be large, with lots of turnover / lots of new people (hence, women) to meet

Downsides of activity groups:

  • The most beautiful women tend not to stick around all that long
  • The people who go to the largest number of activity groups (and you'll meet them if you start frequenting different groups) tend to be either a.) players, b.) attention-seekers, or c.) kind of weird

where to find a woman

The best advice on activity groups is probably this:

  • Go once or twice per group
  • Meet the cool people and women you like worth meeting
  • Grab contact information and plan to meet up later
  • Keep circulating through different groups

Only settle into a group if you REALLY like the people there (and the activities you do), but bear in mind that if you're going to build a social circle out of it, you probably won't meet many women through it (at least in the short term).

Can you meet an amazing woman via activity groups?

In my experience, beautiful / intelligent / awesome personality women with a lot going on for them may try out activity groups like this once or twice, usually when on the rebound and trying to get themselves back into the socializing game, but because the caliber of people is more average here, they don't tend to stick around long. So, you've got to be moving quickly with women you meet who ARE of quality - they probably won't be back next week.

You get one shot per woman, and that's it. Make those shots count.


#5: Salsa Night

Salsa class / salsa night is an easy favorite for meeting higher caliber women. If you ever find yourself pulling your hair out over where to find a woman to take on a date or to turn into a potential new girlfriend, just go to salsa night.

where to find a woman

Let's talk the class first. What are the advantages of a salsa class?

  • Almost everybody there is single
  • Everyone there is out prospecting for new mates
  • There are usually more women than men
  • The women there tend to be attractive, educated, and fun
  • Meeting new women is easy - you just dance and talk

How about salsa night itself?

  • Again, mostly singles
  • The more skilled women in salsa are often quite beautiful
  • More of a social circle scene, but for people good with dance

Main differences between these are that you need some skill to fare okay on a non-class salsa night; in a class, most of the women you'll be dancing with are unskilled, and all you've really got to do is show up, put in a little effort, and chat with your partner.

Then ask her if she's like to grab a coffee sometime.


#6: The Charity Event

Are you partial to kind yet empowered women? Then check out a charity event.

While some charity events can be places to see and be seen for social ladder-climbing socialites, in general these tend to attract an intriguing assortment of members of the fairer sex:

  1. Higher social status women who use the event to get out, rub elbows with other higher status people doing good for the world, and show their generous sides

  2. Empowered "girl power"-type crusader women who want to fight back against injustice and make the world a better and more egalitarian place

  3. Kindly women who really just want to help other people and feel good about it

where to find a woman

Each of these different kinds of women will be in attendance to different degrees depending on the size of the gathering, type of setting it's being held in, and the cause being supported (not to mention who's throwing the event), but at a large charity event outdoors in the middle of downtown, for instance, you can expect to find a good mix of all three.

Which one should you focus on meeting? Whichever one best suits your style. You can also meet the people here with similar interests to you, and get a bead on where future charity events will be held, to meet more pretty girls (and give back to your community, of course!).


#7: Happy Hour

After work, many young professionals head over to a favored local watering hole to unwind from the day's backbreaking labor - or sitting hunched over a computer in a dimly lit cubicle, whichever the case may be.

There's something very special about happy hour for meeting women; it functions something similar to finding a woman at the office, except now you have access to women from LOTS of different offices. And a lot of the age and relationship-status screening is already done for you; not many older or attached women bother to show up for happy hour.

Like most socializing, it's done by the young and the single and the eager to meet someone new. And if "intelligent" and "educated" and "professional" are some of your requirements for women you'd like to date, you'll run into a far higher concentration of them here.

where to find a woman

You'll probably need to do some exploration among the bars in your town to find out which bars have the best happy hours with the cutest kind of girls who are your taste - but that's the fun part. As you do, you'll typically find a number of places with different kinds of crowds.

Tip: look for the happy hour bars where patrons are standing up and mingling. Sit-down places are to be avoided... they're doable in a pinch, but much harder to get off, and there's little social context for meeting new people. Opt for the places without anywhere to sit down instead.


#8: The Networking Event

Yet another event where people come out expressly to mingle and get acquainted with new individuals they have yet to meet. Networking events, like happy hours, tend to attract young, single professionals, although they'll also typically have a selection of older individuals with more established careers, who are usually doing the inspecting and hiring (and, by the way, if you're looking for a job, and not a mate, make sure to focus on the older people there, not the younger ones... the older professionals are the ones with positions they're looking to fill. The younger ones want you to hire them!).

where to find a woman

Different kinds of networking events attract different kinds of crowds - and it's easy to use these to filter based on preferences. For instance, there are:

  • Young professionals networking events (people in their 20s and 30s, often single, usually working at a corporate job of some sort or another)

  • Chamber of commerce meetings (a wider spectrum of individuals; fewer attendance by younger people, but better to go to if you're job hunting)

  • Niche networking events, like an acting and modeling networking event, or a photography and artwork networking event

These events are usually easiest to meet women at if you fit the crowd. For instance, if you're a corporation man, you'll probably be right at home at a young professionals' event, but may have a hard time clicking with people at a modeling and acting event, unless you've spent enough time in that world to more easily relate (but, if you want to date a model or date an actress, it might be worth a shot regardless).

Look for events thrown in trendy places and by trendy networking companies - there tend to be a handful of networking organizations in every city that throw regular events with solid attendances.


#9: The Party

This is where you work your connections and find out what's going on where, when, and who's invited. Unlike most of the other things on this list, you can't just up and go there without a little homework; you need to be plugged into a group or circle that throws good parties and invites you to them.

If you're not currently, but you'd like to be, check out the article on how to make friends and start circle-building.

But let's say you've got the bead on some good parties. How do things work here?

Well, as it turns out, parties are some of the easiest places to meet women at. You've got all this going for you at a party:

  • The women you'll meet are all friends of your friends, so they're likely to be of the same or similar socioeconomic class, educational and aspirational backgrounds, and interests to you - instant compatibility

  • People at parties are more comfortable because they're among friends, not strangers - their guards are lowered and they're more open to meeting new people

  • You instantly have at least some social proof, as you're assumed to at least be a friend of a friend

  • There are lots of women on the periphery of your social circle - that is, the prime place in your social circle to pull new women from

  • Sex logistics are often handled already (empty bedrooms, bathrooms) or much easier (your place is in the next building over)

Not to mention the fact that people are only at parties to hang out, have fun, meet new people, and, often, hook up with attractive members of the opposite sex.

where to find a woman

So go, move through the crowd, meet some new and pretty girls, and see what you can get going on.


#10: Online

The great thing about an online dating site is that everybody who's there is there for the same thing (more or less). Contacting other people and chatting them up to assess them as possible mates is what you do there... and it's the only thing you do there.

Other kinds of websites can work for this too - e.g., social networking sites - although typically they're not nearly as good for this as purely dating sites; after all, the women on dating sites are self-selecting themselves to be available for your advances.

where to find a woman

You can even use a situational opener to get the ball rolling with girls you'll meet online; one of my favorites has long been, "So how's the whole online dating thing treating you, miss?"

More on online dating here: "3 Essential Tips for Online Dating Message and Email Writing," "Why to NOT Meet Girls on Facebook," "Chase's Guide to Online Dating (2010)."


10 Places Without Much Social Context

Not everywhere you go is designed explicitly for socializing, however. Sometimes you're just going to have to do a straight-up cold approach and walk up to a girl and introduce yourself.

Places without so much instant social context have one big drawback - women often won't be expecting your approach, and won't be ready to engage with you right off the bat - and one major benefit - almost nobody else is doing this, which makes you stand out in a very good way and also makes you something of a scarce commodity.

If you can muster the brass to start approaching in these situations where it isn't second nature to meet new people, you'll often find you meet much higher caliber women than you'll normally meet in the places with instant social context - partly because some of the highest caliber women don't need or go to many places with lots of social context, and partly because you get attractiveness points for boldly and smoothly approaching where no man has approached her before.


#11: The Street

Want to know where to find a woman you'll find stunning, alluring, and a perfect match for you consistently? It's the street. The street is the place to meet awesome women you'd be hard-pressed to meet elsewhere.

That's because many of the most beautiful, intelligent, amazing women don't feel much of a need to go to bars or networking events or anywhere else like that... but they do need to walk to where they're going. The street is one of the few places you can meet some of these women.

where to find a woman

Of course, every good thing has things that make it tough too, and the street is no exception:

  • You need to really get some practice in to get your timing and approach right - it's easy to startle women or bumble your approach when you're unsure what you're doing, or even if you know what you're doing but you're rusty

  • You need to deal with women who are in a hurry, women who think you're trying to sell them something (part of why Ricardus likes using "Are you single?" as an opener is because it gets the "What are this guy's intentions?" question out of the way right from the very first line), and women who will act like you're a total weirdo for walking up to talk to them on the street, even if you look like Brad Pitt

  • You need to be able to handle social pressure and not be overly concerned with the fact that people around you on the street are watching you talk to this new woman you've just walked up to and approached - people aren't used to seeing this, and it's a curiosity for them

Are these tough spots worth overcoming? Certainly, yes. You'll met some amazing women on the street, and you can on average get more attractive and higher caliber girls via street game than you will via bars, clubs, parties, events, etc., where frequently the prettiest and highest status girls are more concerned with maintaining their images than getting together with new and attractive men.

On the street, there's little to no concern for image - it's just you and her.

For more on street game, see: "Using Day Game to Get Girls: 14 Myths Debunked," "Day Pick Up: Take Girls from Street to Bed in a Snap," and "Nighttime Street Game."


#12: Out Shopping

An easier way to get started meeting women during the day that's less bold than doing street approaches and incorporates a bit more social context is meeting girls who are shopping for something in a store.

Grocery stores are surprisingly common places for people to meet, and it's one that women talk about a lot in women's dating advice magazines: "That Cute Guy in Aisle 6!" If you start paying attention, you'll commonly notice a lot of pretty girls locking their eyes on you in the supermarket - perhaps in part because there's not much else to look at besides boxes of food, but perhaps a bit because there's almost a fairy tale for women these days of meeting Mr. Right while out stocking up on dairy products.

where to find a woman

All you've got to do is make a wry comment on the contents of her hand cart, or ask her if she knows how to cook something with the ingredient you're holding in your hand - if she likes you, she'll stick around to chat.

Clothing stores are another good choice for meeting women with some context. A personal favorite has always been holding up something clearly not designed for grown men and asking her, "Do you think this makes my eyes stand out?"

Further reading: "How to Pick Up Girls Shopping for Gifts or Groceries."


#13: The Bookstore

Large, multistory bookstores (the ones with little cafés on their second floors) in the center of downtown often make great places to meet new women, especially if you like your women well-read.

You'll tend to find a caliber of woman a notch above the ordinary here (although if you meet her at the magazine rack, all bets are off). Some other advantages of bookstores:

  • Women at bookstores typically have free time. That's why their at bookstores, instead of, say, rushing off to work

  • Women at bookstores are usually alone - which means less reputation management and more openness to meeting you if they genuinely enjoy your company

  • Women at bookstores want something to do - no one goes to a bookstore with an itching burn to read; rather, she goes there to do something nice and different with her day. If you show up and provide scintillating conversation, she may be just as happy (or happier) to do that instead of read

  • The little café these typically include provides an easy way to take a girl on an instant date then and there - once you've talked to her for 5 to 10 minutes, if you want to keep things going (rather than get a phone number and get on your way), just invite her to grab a coffee or a cocoa

where to find a woman

There really aren't too many downsides of bookstores, except that their turnover is often not very high (not a huge number of women coming and going). However, if you live in a large city like New York or London, the centrally-placed bookstores get a lot of foot traffic, and a lot of pretty girls coming and going - it's easy to mix in meeting some women in bookstores with meeting women out and about on the street or in some of the other stores in the area too.


#14: Airplanes, Buses, and Trains

Transit has been one of my longtime favorites for meeting women, dating back to when I used to live in Washington, D.C., and a ride on the metro was how I started each outing going out to meet girls. There'd invariably be a cute girl waiting for the train there already (it was often about 20 minutes between trains at my train station in Arlington, Virginia), and we'd invariably have a little time to get to know one another.

where to find a woman

The great things about planes, trains, and buses are:

  • Every girl is thrilled to meet an attractive guy while waiting for her conveyance to arrive (instead of, say, meeting a drooling bum, or a decrepit old person, or a guy who looks more like a criminal than a dashing Prince Charming)

  • It's boring waiting for the bus or the train to arrive or the plane to start boarding... and let's be honest, she's not that interested in what she's listening to on her iPhone or what she's doing on her laptop - she'd much prefer to be in a good conversation with you

  • If you get into a good conversation prior to boarding the conveyance, it's easy to continue talking as you do and then go sit together. This is key - you must keep talking, to avoid that weird "I guess we should go sit other places now" vibe that happens during the transition if you let the conversation die - but if you do it, you've just moved the girl and gotten the same degree of commitment as had you asked her to sit with her and she said "yes"

You can sometimes have women change their plans and come with you (ask where she's off to first, and if it doesn't seem like she has solid plans, but it DOES seem like the two of you are really hitting it off, see if you can have her accompany you to a coffee shop - or back home to your place - instead); most of the time though, you'll want to make sure to get their phone numbers as soon as possible.

I can't tell you how many women I've hit it off with, we hit it off, and then suddenly it's their stop and they're sorrowfully bidding me goodbye and rushing off the train before their stop is missed - and I've been left kicking myself for having forgotten to get their numbers sooner. One of the most beautiful women I've ever met was this way - an absolutely breathtakingly stunning Russian brunette in her mid-20s working finance in a city in Asia - we clicked amazingly well... I was thinking to myself, "Here's the possible future mother of my children"... and then the train doors opened, and I lost her in a sea of moving people, never to see her again. I still get annoyed thinking about that - get her phone number as soon as you hit it off. You never know when she'll be off the train and gone (on the flip side, I have plenty of women I've followed this rule with and met up with later and turned into friends, lovers, and even girlfriends - get her number. It's Rule #1 of transit game).

For more on transit, see "Meeting Women on Buses, Trains, and Airplanes."


#15: University Campuses

Meeting women on college campuses can be an easy way of finding women who are both young and educated (or, at least, becoming educated). However, like street game, it typically requires direct openers or semi-direct openers on the approach; there's no dancing around the fact that you just walked up to her because you find her attractive here. So don't try to disguise it; that'll only make her question your motives (or confidence levels).

where to find a woman

If you're going to school, this is easy enough - just talk to girls you see on the sidewalk, on benches, in parks, or in the computer lab as you walk about campus or make your way to class. If you're not going to school, you can still do this, though you might want to be attending or auditing a class at the university so at least you have a valid reason for being there. If there's an especially good café or restaurant on campus that you like eating at or working out of, this can be a very good excuse for being there too.


#16: The Beach

One of the more fun options for meeting pretty girls at is the beach. Nothing quite like sand, surf, and babes in bikinis now, is there?

where to find a woman

The beach actually has a few things going for it when it comes to meeting women:

  • Like bookstores, women at the beach have plenty of free time. They're not rushing to get anywhere, and their schedules aren't spilling over at the brim with too much to do. They're relaxing, sunning, and don't need to be anywhere any time soon - which means if you hit it off, you have more time to connect, and more time to take her somewhere else, later

  • Also like bookstores, women go to the beach because they want to do something nice... but the beach itself (or the music they're listening to on their iPhones) is not so engaging that they wouldn't rather talk to the right guy with the right conversation

  • Beaches have a very "vacation-y" feel to them, even if you live in a beach town... women at the beach are in a more conducive mindset to indulging in their desires than women in most other environments are

  • Like most no-social-context places to meet women, most women here aren't talking to other people or with many friends (or sometimes none at all), so there's little social pressure to place reputation over desires

This generally works best if you meet women sunbathing or sitting by the shore alone when you yourself are alone; if you go out and find mostly women in pairs on the beach, you're better served bringing a friend along to act as wingman.

The full guide on meeting girls on the beach is right here: "Unmasking the Secrets of Beach Pickup: Why It's EASY."


#17: The Gym

If you're into girls with flat stomachs, low body fat, and buns of steel, there's no better place to look than at your neighborhood gym.

The gym's one where you've got to mind your P's and Q's - one of the few stories I've ever heard of a guy being asked to leave a place and never come back for talking to girls was a guy who would just walk around and hit on every girl in his gym over a period of months. Don't do this if your social intuition still needs tuning; if you ever get accused of being "awkward" or "weird" or "creepy," the gym is probably out.

However, if you're a smooth guy that women respond to and like, you can make the gym work. Because, just like guys check out girls at the gym, girls check out guys too. There's a large contingent of female gym goers who even go MOSTLY just to meet attractive, fit, disciplined men... all those girls over on the treadmill going a mile-an-hour with a layer of makeup on their faces and their hair in perfect ponytails are not just there to get in great shape, I assure you.

where to find a woman

You'll usually need to treat the gym like a social circle type of environment (especially if you want to keep coming back there and not have it be awkward); that means, ping girls, be social in general (even with other guys there), and let them get to know you a bit before you go inviting them out anywhere.

To read up on getting girls at the gym, see: "Gym Pickup: Dos Don'ts and How to Meet Girls at a Gym."


#18: The Coffee Shop

Cafés and coffee shops are similar to bookstores in that they tend to attract a somewhat more discerning crowd: well-read women with educations are pretty commonplace here.

Waiting in line can be one of the easiest ways to meet a girl in a café, although that's somewhat down to chance; you've got to hope a cutie winds up in front of you or behind you (and that she's receptive to you, too).

where to find a woman

Meeting girls already seated is a bit more in your control, although it's also somewhat trickier to pull off. The easiest way of going about this is by sitting down at the table next to a girl, immersing yourself in reading a book or working on your laptop for a few minutes, and then casually leaning over a bit and pinging to see if she's open to conversation then.

If she is, you can always switch tables to sit with her and get to know her better then - and, if she has time and it goes really well, take her somewhere else eventually (or even back to yours or hers).


#19: The Bar or Club

Wait a second - a bar or a nightclub is a place where you can find a great woman?

Yes and no. Bars and nightclubs have very different demographics depending on who frequents them. You'll find one of these venues filled to the brim with the dive bar crowd; one with people dancing sensually to electronic music; another bouncing up and down to Hip-Hop. Sometimes you'll find lounges where upscale, educated individuals congregate and get to know one another.

Bars and nightclubs have these things going for them when it comes to meeting new women:

  • There is a certain expectation going to a nighttime venue that people of the opposite sex are going to come up to you to meet you and see if you connect as potential mates - it's built into the very fabric of a lot of these places

  • You have an excuse to dress up and look your best - clothes make the man, and good fashion does a lot to turn an attractive man into an impressive man, or even an amazing man

  • One-night stands are not uncommon and are sometimes expected (especially if you really hit it off), shortening the time from saying hello to going to bed, and reducing the odds of escalation windows being missed or life intervening

  • Alcohol is ubiquitous; and as everyone knows, sex and alcohol tend to go together like peas in a pod (and women often choose to drink as a means of excusing their dalliances later on in the evening)

  • It's significantly easier to escalate things quickly with women and invite them home in nighttime venues than it is in most other types of venue

where to find a woman

On the down side, you're a lot more likely to meet club queens and party girls at bars and nightclubs - if you're looking for a great girlfriend, these can be harder to find at night.

For more on how to succeed in these kinds of venues, see: "How to Pick Up Girls in Bars and Clubs."


#20: Hired Guns

Rounding out our list of where to find a woman who rings all your bells is anywhere you'll find a hired gun. Hired guns - if you aren't familiar with the term - are women hired to work as clerks, salespeople, survey takers, cocktail waitresses, strippers, dancers, models, barmaids, or anything else.

While there is some social context here - you can always talk to them about their jobs - they're accustomed to male patrons flirting with them (especially if they're pretty or in an environment where people drink) and are used to deflecting questions about work or themselves with brief, short answers.

where to find a woman

Hired guns can be tough cookies - they're running on autopilot 95% of the time - but they are still women and they do still get attracted to male customers some of the time. The key with them is:

  • Not being a customer (not buying anything) and/or downplaying your customer role (buying something, but being very nonchalant about it, and not spending a lot of time deliberating or treating her like your "helper")

  • Having industry knowledge (helps immensely if you're able to connect with her as an insider, rather than someone impressed by her job or someone trying to connect with her on the same superficial details everybody and his brother tries to connect with her on)

  • Standing out in a very attractive way unusual to the customers she normally encounters

The one downside to hired guns is that they're usually not the highly intellectual / highly educated types (although they can be sometimes, especially if they're younger and working their ways through school).

However, if that's not something on that checklist of qualities you're searching for in a belle, it probably won't much matter to you.


Where to Find a Woman to Make You See Stars

The key to all of this of course is: get out there and meet new women.

You won't find the girl of your dreams sitting around the house playing computer games or throwing darts at the wall. You've got to throw on your going-out clothes and mosey on out of the apartment or house.

Whether you're searching in one of those environments rich in social context:

  1. The classroom
  2. The office
  3. The social club
  4. The activity group
  5. Salsa night
  6. The charity event
  7. Happy hour
  8. The networking event
  9. The party
  10. Online

... or you're looking for your potential dream women in places that require you to be a bit more direct:

  1. The street
  2. Out shopping
  3. The bookstore
  4. Airplanes, buses, and trains
  5. University campuses
  6. The beach
  7. The gym
  8. The coffee shop
  9. The bar or club
  10. Hired guns

... there are as many different avenues you can use to meet women as there are flavors and varieties of women and ways of getting to know them.

No big bookstores or popular beaches in your town? No big deal... you've still got 18 other options to run through.

The amazing women are out there. It's on you to go find them.

Why are you still staring at the computer screen?

Always,
Chase Amante

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