Female Mind

Men often think women don't like them for something unrelated. When in fact 'she's intimidated by you' is often the true cause of women's reserve.

Do you intimidate women?

Might you intimidate women even if you think you don't?

For years, a professionally successful friend of mine has struggled with women. He's a tall guy with a healthy bank account, a good head on his shoulders, and a rugged ex-Marine Corps background. On top of all that, he's studied game under many of the more notable seduction gurus that have come and gone.

This friend does direct day game, and everyone who's gone out with him tells me his game is very solid. It's no problem for him to attract attractive (and often much younger) women. He has little difficulty to get them out onto dates either. Many of them come home to his place after, and often he's able to kiss them and begin the escalation.

But there his efforts stop. Because almost every single woman he ends up this far with (and he gets this far with lots of girls) puts the brakes on hard and leaves. He can go almost a year without sleeping with a new girl sometimes, despite bringing girl after girl to his place and getting to the kiss.

He's tried taking it slow and stretching things out across multiple dates. He's tried going for it in one date. He tried an exercise I gave him, where his mission was to invite one girl home each day for 30 days, including women he'd just met on the street. It surprised him how easy it was to get girls back to his place -- yet none of these girls he pulled home slept with him.

He's tried technique after technique, method after method. He's tried abandoning seduction techniques and focusing on the gym or clothes or other physical attractive qualities. He's tried everything. He's mystified myself and a few other very experienced friends too... purely by dumb luck a guy who pulls as many women home as he does should sleep with one of them at least accidentally. But almost every single seduction of his ends the same way.

In the end though, it turned out there was one thing above all he had to fix.

Once he fixed it, he finally cleared his final hurdle to getting together with women he wanted.

That one thing was intimidate women less -- a problem he did not even realize he had.

If you want to take women to bed fast, here’s how to set a sexual tone and get them horny and in the sheets – or a convenient bathroom stall – lickety split.

Many years ago, I was practicing my pickup skills in this bar in Montreal, and I ran into two guys – Tall Guy and Short Guy. They were leaning up against the wall looking cool, scanning the room, and occasionally nodding at each other. Recognizing them as fellow hunters in search of women for fast sex, I went over and said, “What’s up?”

“Oh, we’re just practicing,” Short Guy replied.

“Practicing what?” I asked.

“Eye contact. Vibe. How about you?”

“I’m here to pick up chicks.”

They nodded their heads and tipped their fedoras in approval (I’m serious. This was 2007. Pickup dudes wore fedoras).

“Question?” I asked.

“Sure.”

“Have you guys approached any girls yet?”

“What? Oh no, we don’t approach. We let them approach us.”

“Really?” I said, shocked that there was some magic new technique I hadn’t heard of yet.

“Yeah, man,” Tall Guy said. “It’s way better when they approach you.”

“Sooo,” I said skeptically, “have any girls approached you yet?”

“No, man. Not yet. But they will. These things take time.”

Confused but fascinated, I stood back for a few minutes and watched their method. If this was true and there really was a “they approach you” approach, I needed to learn and master it. It would make life so much easier. It would feel like I was in Fall Out Boy.

So, I stood at the bar twiddling my thumbs for a few more minutes and quickly grew bored. I wandered out onto the small dance floor and tried high-fiving a few girls, but they ignored me. I said something to another girl, and she ignored me, too.

Being ignored has always failed to deter my seductive ambitions, so I tried again and again, not having a clue what I was saying, only hoping one of these pretty creatures would give me a shot. Eventually, after about twelve tries, one did. We started dancing, then grinding, then kissing and making out. As I left the bar with her, I looked back at the two fedora-tipping masters (who were still womanless), who gave me a wave and a thumbs-up.

If you have one of these beliefs about women, it's holding you back... and you probably don't even realize it.

Each man sees the world in a different way.

Some of the differences between how one man sees the world and how the next one does are slight. Other differences, though, are extreme.

If a man holds the right beliefs, he unshackles himself to achieve success beyond his most fantastic hopes and dreams. If he holds beliefs that limit him though, he may stumble into great ravines on the road to wish fulfillment... or he may chain himself fast, so that he never starts on the road to fulfillment at all.

There are four types of limiting beliefs men hold:

1. Inaccessibility ("I can't get/have what I want")

2. Over-accessibility ("I can have that whenever I want")

3. Transience ("Once I have it, I'm destined to lose it")

4. Permanence ("Once I have it, or someone else does, it's forever")

Those beliefs boil down into two dimensions: one of accessibility, and the other of transience/permanence.

The most accurate belief sets abandoned these extremes. Men who succeed most stop thinking about the world in terms of the blacks and whites of beliefs like these, and view it as a vast world of gray -- a promising world of gray, with boundaries and limitations, but where most things are achievable, though not always easy.

Today we're going to talk about 12 common limiting beliefs men have about women and dating. Hang onto these beliefs, you'll make costly mistakes, or never get far with women at all. Wouldn't it be neat though, to be free of these beliefs -- and free to meet the women you want, date them how you want, and get success with them that seems out of reach to most other men?

The best way to overturn limiting beliefs is through action, because action is where you put your beliefs to the test -- and find out which hold up, and which do not. We'll talk about this below too.

We'll begin with one of the most common limiting beliefs: that girls like that are simply too hot for you.

Think women are crazy? If so, it’s probably because you’ve dated one. Fact is, beneath their seemingly emotional disarray, you’ll find a high level of rationality.

Men like to complain about how emotional and irrational women are. We even hear many of those claims in the seduction community and its neighboring communities – e.g., the Manosphere, the Red Pill community, etc.

“Women are feelz before realz.”

“Chick logic.”

Some of these guys even brand women children who are incapable of making adult decisions based on logic and reason. Here at Girls Chase, we know better.

Women are emotional, but not irrational. In fact, they are far more rational than you can imagine – when it comes to what’s important.

Put another way, women are guided by their emotions, but that doesn’t lead them to make as many stupid decisions as you might think. That’s the real accusation behind men calling women “irrational,” isn’t it? That they are less capable of making sound decisions?

Let’s be clear – there is some truth to the claim that women are less rational than men. Men are the leaders of our species, better equipped to make hard decisions like where to eat dinner or how to defeat an army. But when it comes to sexual selection, women are vastly more competent than men. That’s why 80% of women in history have reproduced, whereas for men, that figure is below 40%.

The emotion-based behavior of women leads them to be vastly more successful at sexual selection than men, which makes them highly rational, since sexual selection is one of the most important decisions – perhaps the most important – that any human can make.

Thus, I would argue that women are not irrational. They’re simply designed for different purposes than men and perform their purpose well because of their emotional nature.

Women use subtle ways to express their interest. Keep an eye out for these 11 signs though, and women's subtle signals become clear as day.

Women express interest in men in all sorts of subtle ways. Much of the time, you may not even pick up on the signs... or you may have a vague sense she's interested, but not be sure.

It's a common thing for a guy to think maybe a girl's interested, but actually you're not sure, so you let her go... only to realize later on that, yep, she was definitely interested -- and you missed your shot.

In the list below, we'll lay out 11 of the more subtle ways women use to express interest in you. Once armed with these, you won't have to wonder if "maybe she is." You'll know when you've spotted one of the signs -- and can proceed with her accordingly.

Let's start with #1.

Does having good game impact whether a girl will be attracted to you? Short answer: yes, if she allows it to. A few key factors influence whether or not she will.

It’s newbie question time!

“Hi, Tony.

I’m very curious about predictable patterns you’ve noticed in women’s behavior that they exhibit immediately after you act a certain way towards them or use certain techniques on them at the right time. For example, after you pass their screens, get past their resistance, or qualify them at the right time, they stop controlling some of their attraction for you.

Their compliance threshold increases and they’re overall more open to moving forward with you. Just how much does this compliance threshold increase on average, and how long do you have to take advantage of it before it decreases? And have you noticed women saying relatively the same thing during this time? Do they actively try to build similarity with you? 

Hope that made sense. Thanks for taking questions!”

Okay, I’m going to break this down from nerd-speak into plain English.

““I’m very curious about predictable patterns you’ve noticed in women’s behavior that they exhibit immediately after you act a certain way towards them or use certain techniques on them at the right time.”

Translation: “Does game actually work?”

Yes, it does, if the woman allows it to. There must be some minuscule amount of attraction locked away deep in her heart. It may have alarm bells, locked doors, and security guards. If this is the case, it’s your job as the seducer to break in and steal it.

Relationship insecurity and loss of respect are common culprits when women create drama. Here’s how to identify the root of the issue and nip it in the bud.

The drama is never done with your girlfriend. There will always be drama, regardless of whether you did anything to annoy her, anger her, or make her feel insecure.

If you’re running the relationship well, drama will be low. You run a relationship well by providing her with good dick and enough adventure to satisfy her. You maintain her respect by being a man with pride and self-respect and by making her feel secure that you won’t randomly leave her without due cause.

Of course, her personality and propensity for anxiety, depression, anger, jealousy, and other drama-causing emotions play a huge role in how often she starts drama. That’s why picking a girl carefully is paramount for a healthy long-term relationship.

Nevertheless, you will eventually do something to upset her or she’ll be upset about something in her life and it will make her over-sensitive to normally acceptable behavior – then she’ll take it out on you.

This is fine. Drama is good. Without drama, we’d get bored. My primary reactions to drama are annoyance or anger – but occasionally, I enjoy it. The ups and downs addict us. Plus, it’s fun to watch her get horny when you win an argument. It’s great when she was mad at you but she’s forgiven you for something – you may be a bastard, but you’re her bastard.

However, you need to know how to finish drama. And one tip that will save you a lot of frustration is this: drama isn’t usually over after one fight – or even one discussion.

If the drama was anything beyond a small misunderstanding, it might take two, three, or even more talks to settle the fire, and days could pass between each discussion. You’ll think everything is fine, that you solved the issue, but then a few days later, you’ll notice she’s in a mood, and you’ll ask yourself, “What did I do now?” You’ll wonder and wonder, then prod and prod, asking her what’s up. You’ll get the infamous “nothing” response. Then you keep nagging.

Yes, keep nagging. Don’t let her get away with answering “nothing” when it’s clearly something. That will show you to be insensitive to her emotions, which makes her feel like you don’t understand her. It’s your job as a boyfriend to take care of her emotions. You’re her lover and, in some ways, her father.

If a girlfriend won’t spit it out, I’ll say to her, “Okay, we’ll I’ve asked multiple times now and you won’t tell me what’s wrong. Later, if you tell me something was wrong, I’m going to be pissed. This is your chance.” Usually, she will tell me at this point. If she doesn’t and complains about something later, I’ll have morally righteous anger on my side, which is very powerful in drama.

“Woman, I told you…”

Works like a charm.

Once you find out what’s wrong, it’s time to deal with the problem. This is done in two steps.