Female Mind | Page 15 | Girls Chase

Female Mind

A look into the way women see love, life, lust, and relationships.

How to Keep Girls Addicted in Relationships

Varoon Rajah's picture

keep girls addicted in relationships
We’ve all experienced or have seen relationships go stale and die, but they don’t have to. The secret is to keep her addicted with volatility and unpredictability.

I’ve noticed some interesting patterns with a good friend of mine in the city. He’s been seeing this girl for a long time. He met her via day game and it ended up with sex on the first date. It’s been several years now, and he’s been seeing her like a girlfriend, while still gaming and sleeping with other girls discreetly on the side once in a while.

I think he would be trying to meet more women, but he seems to be pretty satiated with her at the moment. Whenever I see him, it’s always her that seems to be messaging and chasing after him. From what he tells me, their sex life is great. She always messages him to get together and sees him 2–4 times a week. It seems that they have wild sex virtually the entire time they’re together. He says she might be doing it to keep him from meeting other girls, which she knows he’s fully capable of doing.

This is a different pattern from what most guys do when they’re with women. They get comfortable, then play it safe in a relationship. Men try to keep their relationship stable — and effectively boring. It’s because the majority of guys are generally safe and boring by nature, so it’s their normal inclination to do the same with the women in their life.

On the other hand, women thrive on change, stimulation, and challenge, especially with shifting feelings and emotions. It’s even better when they can tie the source of those shifting emotions to the man they're with (women do this with bad boys, after all).

The ONE THING That Drives Women Crazy Above All Else (Video)

Hector Castillo's picture

What is the single most attractive quality that women see in a man?

You probably won’t guess it.

It’s not money. It’s not looks. It’s not height. It’s not a big dick. It’s not charm. It’s not intelligence.

Confused yet?

You’ll see, and I’ll explain.

Female State Control Vaccines: Social Frame

Alek Rolstad's picture

female state control
Your social frame is possibly the most important thing when battling Female State Control. This means projecting the right social frame in the right context.

Welcome back. Previously, we have discussed female state control (FSC), described what it is, and presented some solutions. FSC is when a woman backs off (despite liking you) so she doesn’t “lose herself” and get “carried away by you” before she knows for sure you are a good guy for her to get with.

Women are selective, and they know that being aroused or mentally stimulated by a guy is not enough of an indicator of a suitable mate. Yet they tend to get carried away. So whenever women feel like they are losing control, they back off to make a more “rational” assessment of you.

A simple way to put it is this: have you ever gotten a girl aroused and could tell she was into you, yet she backed off saying you are not her type?

Well, that is not an uncommon scenario. This is female state control. She likes you; she is turned out by you, but either:

  • You don’t fit her social standards
  • You do not fit into the usual categories of guys she likes
  • She doesn’t feel comfortable exploring further

What we are dealing with is a lack of what Gunwitch calls “social frame.” And a lack of social frame can force women to control their state whenever they feel emotionally stimulated by you.

So, arousal + social frame = a high chance of pulling (if logistics allow). On the other hand, arousal with a lack of social frame means she will get aroused but control her state.

In other words, having a lack of social frame makes her control herself, and creating a good social frame minimizes your chances of dealing with FSC. In the next three weeks, we will discuss the three aspects of creating social frame that we touched upon last week, but we'll get into greater detail.

These aspects are:

If you're unfamiliar with any of those terms, click on them to learn more.

Today, let’s take a look at the first aspect: social status, value, and overall social dynamics.

But before we get into that, here’s a quick recap of what social frame is as it relates to FSC.

Female State Control (FSC): Social Frame and Comfort

Alek Rolstad's picture

female state control
To avoid triggering Female State Control in the women you seek to bang, it helps to focus on particular concepts, such as social frame, investment, and comfort.

Welcome back. I promised to share my latest insights on female state control (FSC). We've been discussing this new concept over the last few weeks, so here are the previous articles if you haven't had a chance to read them:

  1. Female State Control (FSC): Theoretical Causes and Effects
  2. Female State Control (FSC): Preemptive Measures

Quick recap: FSC is a defense mechanism that auto-regulates a woman’s state whenever she feels that her emotions are getting out of control. A woman may be stimulated by a guy too much, too fast. Despite enjoying the strong emotions this man elicits, it can become too much for her, causing her to slow things down or outright eject.

Here are three reasons a woman needs to regulate her state:

  1. To protect herself: she wants time to assess and know that a guy is safe to hook up with. She needs to regulate her state so she can make a sober judgment of him.

  2. To feel in control of the situation and not feel helpless: knowing that she is in control creates comfort

  3. To maintain her social/sexual power: by putting out too much, a woman gives away social power, which she could otherwise use to create social bonds and acquire providers

A woman controls her state in these ways:

  • Putting herself away from you: she will leave to go dance, go to the bathroom, and so on
  • Turn cold (out of the blue)
  • Have her friends drag her state down (cockblock you or cockblock her)
  • De-escalate the interaction

FSC can be misinterpreted as anti-slut defense (ASD), which shares similar symptoms.

In my previous post, we discussed solutions on how to avoid FSC by:

  • Slowing things down
  • Focus on frames rather than buyer’s temperature

Today we will go further by looking at what we can do to bypass it.

Double Standards Are Perfectly Okay

Chase Amante's picture
double standards
Guys get told they’re guilty of horrible double standards all the time. But are double standards actually a bad thing… and are they even real?

There is a strange phenomenon in urban places. Double standards come under attack.

Not all double standards, mind you. But certain ones.

How to Get Somewhere with a Girl: The Floors and Ceilings Method

Chase Amante's picture
how to get somewhere with a girl
It’s simple to get somewhere with a girl when you use the floors and ceilings method. Raise her floor, and raise her ceiling, and she will soon be yours.

I just talked to Alek about his neat new series on Female State Control. If you haven't read it yet, check it out (see the link).

When we talked about that, it brought up a way of thinking about how to get somewhere with a girl I've long had, but not discussed much. I've talked about it here and there, especially with deep diving and connection stuff. It's a sort of basic understanding of how progress with women works.

This understanding is what we might call 'The Floors and Ceilings Method'.

This method is very slightly complicated to understand. But not much. And once you have it, it gives you another dimension to understand male-female courtships with.

The method isn't limited to seduction. It also works with sales. It works with new friendship formation. Any kind of new relationship formation, especially where you want to get someone to do something, uses it. We'll focus on using it with women you like in this article, but it applies everywhere.

This is a simple method. I'll explain how it works, and you'll soon see how it applies to so many things.

Female State Control (FSC): Preemptive Measures

Alek Rolstad's picture

female state control
In our continuing study of Female State Control, we consider methods to avoid it entirely, including better calibration and focusing more on frame control than arousal.

Hey, guys. Welcome back.

In my previous post, I discussed a new and different form of resistance that we labeled Female State Control (FSC). This form of resistance is very common, different from the other more well-known resistance type called anti-slut defense or ASD. The difference is that ASD deals with her defense mechanism against slut-shaming and other negative social consequences related to female promiscuity.

FSC is a biological mechanism that helps women make rational choices about sex partners. Women tend to get easily carried away in their emotions, and that is usually beneficial to their purpose of nurturing and also grants them a higher emotional intelligence (EQ) than men. Strong emotions can help her make good decisions (emotions hindering rational decision-making is not always true; often, it is quite the opposite). However, when emotions seem to be too strong (too much of the good stuff), there is a potential risk of her getting carried away, hence increasing the chance of making an irrational choice.

We must understand that women are instinctively more risk-averse than men, partly because of the higher risks they may experience during pregnancy. Therefore, it is imperative that women are more selective than men when it comes to choosing a mate.

So, whenever a woman is getting carried away, she has an underlying conscious voice that forces her to pull herself out of situations where she can get carried away, by:

  • Resisting
  • De-escalating the vibe
  • Going to the bathroom
  • Having her friend cockblock her
  • And so on

These actions allow her to gain control of her emotions and make a rational choice. This is FSC.

Female State Control (FSC): Theoretical Causes and Effects

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

female state control (FSC)
Women have a built-in defense mechanism against losing control and screwing the wrong guy. Let’s investigate the groundbreaking theory of Female State Control (FSC).

Hey, everyone. I hope you are all doing great. Last week we discussed a key subject in pickup and seduction, namely anti-slut defense (ASD). We define ASD as the female defense mechanism against social consequences caused by perceived promiscuous behavior. In other words, a defense mechanism that protects women against the potential slut label.

ASD helps us understand some of the causes behind female resistance toward sexual advances (in addition to feeling uncomfortable with the person or situation or simply not being that attracted to a guy; the latter is more of a rejection than a form of resistance). This is why women sometimes resist your advances despite being clearly into you.

Today we’ll discuss another form of resistance. In the future, I will cover this in detail. This form is called female state control (FSC). It has been known, at least on an intuitive level by some top seducers, but it has neither been addressed publicly nor written about in much detail. It shocks me a bit that this phenomenon is never discussed, because it is a key factor with encounters and seduction. It isn’t some weird subject that only happens to top-end seducers in rare circumstances. Beginners will also face this issue, actually more often than the pros.

As mentioned, few will discuss what I mention in this article. I know of only one guy who has put words to FSC, and his article was about a different subject. And because this subject is not discussed often, little is known. I will be honest; this is the topic I talk about the most in my seducer circles, and we still have not figured it all out. I am therefore giving you the latest, cutting-edge theory. Some elements of FSC are closely related to other well-known theories from sociology, psychology, and biology.

Here at Girls Chase we normally stick to topics we know inside out. This will be an exception because it is still a theory in development. Therefore, I will only give you the basic elements here, and expound upon it later posts when we know more and have clarity. Certainly more data needs to be collected, but we're on it!

Girls Who Want You, vs. Girls Who Are Bored-but-Available

Chase Amante's picture
available women

There are, in essence, two main classes of women you can hook up with.

The first class is the women who just want you. These women find you attractive (some, even irresistible), compelling, magnetic. There's something about you they like -- or there might be many things about you they like. They're fascinated by you the moment you walk up, or they've grown attached to you over time as they've gotten to know you. They like you, and they actively want to date you, spend time with you, connect with you, be in physical contact with you.

The second class is women who aren't particularly desirous of you, but they are available to you. Many of these women are just bored. Some of them may be available because they're out to rebel, and you fit the "If I hook up with this guy, I'll really be rebelling against Mom/society/my overbearing boyfriend" idea they have in their heads. Some may be available to you for revenge. For some it might be because they want to have an experience. In each of these cases, these women don't want you or like you so much as they want some guy... and you happen to be the best guy available who makes it easy for such a girl to satisfy her mission.

We've talked about this before on Girls Chase. But I really want to dive deep in this article on the girls in the second class.

Because a lot of guys don't even recognize how many women are out there like this at any given time. The fact is though, if you're good with girls, a lot of the women you get will likely come from this class.

The Points of No Return in Seduction and Courtships

Varoon Rajah's picture

points of no return with women
Every courtship is a ladder of many steps, some of which are absolutely crucial to get anywhere. Failing to pass these points of no return will spell almost certain doom.

The basic premise of courtship with a girl is to always have forward progress; as fast as she allows you to move.

Part of being a smooth guy is knowing exactly when and how to push things forward. Whether you meet a sexy girl at night and quickly move toward intimacy in 15-20 minutes, or if you meet a girl in day game and meet her another day for a date, the primary goal is still to move toward sex and intimacy as fast she allows.

Assuming you’re on a date with a girl, or you’re out with her at night pushing things ahead, there are the key points you’ll have to pass to move toward intimacy. If for some reason you don’t push forward, or you don’t succeed, the entire encounter becomes undone and will likely fail.

These are the points of no return, where pushing for success is imperative despite any circumstances, because if you pass these points without progress, the odds of seeing the girl again are virtually nil.

Below I’ve laid out several crucial points to keep things moving forward with a girl. These all play into the basic idea of escalation windows. These are the windows in which you need to move toward intimacy, and they do not last long. Once they close and forward progress ends, she moves on, or backward-rationalizes that it wasn’t meant to be.

One breakthrough in my game this year has been to realize how important it is to win in these moments. Especially if you’re coming from a less aggressive “nice guy” background, your gut will likely tell you to play it safe in moments that actually require you to be bold, aggressive, and persistent.