Social Life

You won’t always be certain. But you need to be able to at least appear certain, when you are in leader-follower (or male-female) situations that demand certainty.

You might have it in your head that you are certain about something, and being certain will help demonstrate certainty. But if your certainty isn’t visible, people will not be fully sold on your certainty, and thus not follow you as wholeheartedly. In seduction, even the slightest error can have her questioning your sincerity, confidence, and any other facet of your personality.

In the first article of this series, we covered the three types of certainty (certainty of knowledge, desire, and morality), then we detailed how to become certain in part 2, and now we will cover how to demonstrate certainty.

A lifestyle of hedonism, pleasure, and abundant bedmates is quite delightful. Yet if you are a playboy, have you betrayed your society to become one?

Society is changing.

Tectonic plates of social mores are rubbing together and creating earthquakes. The ensuing chaos can be seen all around the world, especially in the U.S.

On one side, we can break it down most simply by Liberalism vs. Conservatism. These are the eternal spectrums of any society. Right now, Liberalism is concerning itself with identity politics and claiming to align itself with two ethical principles – tolerance and compassion. These ethical principles naturally create support for causes like climate change activism, racial and sexual equality, and wide-open immigration policies. Whether this is wrong or right is not the focus of this article. I’m simply pointing out what is happening.

Conservatism is currently concerned with nationalist politics and aligning itself with two ethical principles – tradition and independence. The focus on tradition creates a “the law is right, no matter how you feel” framework, which then leads to a direct conflict with policies like open immigration. Independence-focused politics creates conflict with macro ideas like the EU, NAFTA, and the Paris Climate Agreement. With the victory of Donald Trump, an aftershock is now sweeping countries like Hungary and Poland (who were already quite conservative) and pushing their conservatism farther to the right.

Society is now swinging to the right, toward more conservative values. In fact, it has been for a long time. Liberalism has hit its peak and may decline soon, as its surge from the 1960s has begun to lose its momentum.

This is most evident in the arena of sexuality, which I believe (through observation) to be the control point of the rest of society. Everything seems to revolve around sex (at least that’s how I connect the dots).

And since society seems to be swinging to the right politically, that means some big changes are going to affect our attitude toward sexuality, which has both its pros and cons.

How do you handle conversation in a group… especially when there’s a girl you like and want to talk to there? With 3-second eye contact, quality face time, and more.

Ideally, you’d like to be able to meet a girl one-on-one, hit it off with her, and run through the courtship free of distractions or interruptions. You know, that’s like meet her on the street... or in the café... or in the bar... or waiting for the train... and she’s allll by herself. All yours, from the moment you walk up.

In reality, you’ll get this some of the time. But if you’re waiting for only girls you can meet in isolation, you’ll pass up a lot of pretty girls who might otherwise have available to you. Girls you did not approach because they were with other people, and you didn’t want to have to deal with a group conversation.

It is a little dicier handling group conversations. However, there are upsides too. The biggest of which is, like the old ‘group theory’ of yesteryear PUA, once she sees you win over her group of friends, suddenly it becomes a lot easier for her to show attraction to you and agree to move forward with you (assuming she does like you). Effectively managing a conversation with multiple people involved, while also showing interest in and proceeding things forward with one specific girl in the group, shows a lot of good, attractive qualities about you. Leadership, confidence, social savvy, influence, ability to build a private world with her even as you charm everyone else... all these are on display as you work your way deftly through a group conversation situation, if you’re doing it right.

In this article, I’m going to give you some tips on doing it right, to better put you in that ‘successful group conversationalist’ bin.

Psychopaths have tremendous social acumen, but can be very harmful to those closest to them. Here are the 8 signs your friend is one.

They are everywhere. They work with you. They’re in your social circle. They might even be a family member.

Hell, you may even be one.

Psychopaths are everywhere.

Okay, they’re not everywhere. There’s no way to know for sure, but current estimates are that 1% of the population are psychopaths.

And psychopaths are people, except they lack sympathy. Sympathy, not empathy. That’s the big distinction I think needs clarification. If they lacked empathy, they would have a very hard time fitting in with people and manipulating them, since they’d have no idea how those people felt. In fact, it’s more accurate to say that people on the autism spectrum lack empathy. A common factor in autistic people is they regularly have no clue how others feel in a conversation, and they cannot read the most basic of social cues (which are communicated via facial expressions, body language, voice tonality, etc.).

By lacking sympathy, however, psychopaths lack the ability to actually be concerned about you. They lack the emotional response necessary to think “I feel scared for him if he makes this bad decision, so I’ll save him from it” or “He’ll be hurt if I do this to him, so I won’t do it to him.” To conceptually understand something is not even in the same universe as emotionally understanding something. The latter is infinitely more clear.

They may be able to conceptually understand that you might not like it if they bone your girlfriend, but they won’t feel the potential of regret when they consider the possibility of you finding out and being heartbroken.

You can see how this might be potentially dangerous to date a psychopath or have one as a friend. They do not have Nature’s control mechanism of sympathy that serves to prevent mass tragedies in the human species.

Their only concern is what they can get from you, how much it will cost them, and... that’s it, really.

They aren’t fundamentally evil or malicious, but they do have the capacity to be more cruel and malicious than the average person. Given the right conditions, they will strike without a second thought.

It’s imperative, then, that you learn how to spot a psychopath so you can make more informed decisions on what role you want them to play in your life.

If some guy tells you “bros before hoes”, you should probably put your guard up. It isn’t always a conscious thing when men violate this rule, though.

Whenever I hear a guy say “bros before hoes,” my first thought is “Sure, unless there’s a really hot ho in the room.”

As with most morality, you can rest assured that if someone is espousing it or is enforcing it on others, it is in the service of self-interest. This doesn’t necessarily negate the positive outcome of enforcing the specific ethic, but one should be skeptical of anyone virtue signaling, because despite the possible positive outcomes of the ethic, you might still become a casualty when the espouser doesn’t follow it.

This is the nature of trust, is it not? You expect one to act a certain way, especially since they’ve professed to be a keeper of such virtue, because you will bring them into situations where, if they don’t follow it, they could hurt you.

Unfortunately, almost without exception, every person who earnestly supports an ethic will at some point contradict it.

Thus it is highly advised that you be careful who you give the chance to put one over on you.

Now, I’m not saying that nobody is your friend or that any guy would cross you if it lands him a hot girl; but I am saying that, most of the time, he will, excluding the following conditions.

1. His chances with the girl are low, even if he does cross you

2. You provide A LOT for him

In other words, he might be able to tool you or be rude to you for a girl, but he probably won’t if his odds with the gal are low, or if you provide for him, socially or monetarily. That girl’s pussy might feel good, but is it worth losing a connection? This is how sociopaths think twenty-four hours a day.

This may seem like a cynical view, but my experience says otherwise. You can see the dark truths of the world and still be optimistic. You can love life but not walk down Southside Chicago at 2am. It’s unnecessary.

Same with thinking that guys are going to value your friendship over the prospect of pussy. It’s unnecessary and ignores the primal truth of the world – we’re in this for the pussy (and the gals are in it for the cock).

This should be your first assumption with most of your friends, if not all of them.

When you’re head-to-head against another guy over a girl, the last thing you want to do is try to best him at what he’s good at. Beat him on your terms, instead.

Commenting under my article “If a Girl Has Sex with You Fast, is She a Slut?”, Mike asked:

“Hey chase, please I have a question to ask. I want to know how to compete with guys more handsome than me. Thanks.”

It’s a good question. It echoes similar questions I’ve answered in articles and in the comments before, such as:

• How do you compete with men who are famous?

• How do you compete with guys she already knows?

• How do you compete with bad boys when you’re not a bad boy?

I don’t want to spoil the whole article, but the way you win, of course, is by not trying to beat that guy at what he’s good at.

Instead, what you must do to win is change the rules of engagement.

With the right tweaks, you can put a guy on the defensive and emerge victorious for the girl, despite almost any number of on-paper advantages he might seem to have over you.

The brolosopher: smart guy, easygoing diction and delivery. Sharp, savvy, but cool and social. If you want to use that big brain well, it’s time for some brolosophy.

A few years back, I was in a car with my friend. One moment, I was talking about something really deep and profound. I don’t remember what it was, but I do know that the next moment, I made some crass comment about women in some really uneducated language.

My friend, who was driving, laughed hysterically. The juxtaposition of my two stories was pretty strange.

Turning to me, he said in a loving voice, “Hector, you’re the dumbest smart person I’ve ever met in my entire life.”

I didn’t know it at the time, but there was something in what he said. It was the secret to being smart but also socially dominant, physically dominant, and relatable.

And that’s the crux of what this series is about. If you haven’t already, you can (and should) read the previous articles here:

• Part 1: The Problem with Intellectuals

• Part 2: Why Dumb Guys Get Laid

• Part 3: Dumb Down & Get Laid

If you don’t want to go full dumbass with women and socializing (which might hurt boyfriend potential), here’s how you hybridize intelligence and base behavior.

It’s my favorite personality that this entity called Hector sometimes adopts.