In an Age of Connectivity, Maintain Your Privacy | Girls Chase

In an Age of Connectivity, Maintain Your Privacy

Chase Amante

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just you and her
In the Internet age, everyone's cavalier about privacy. But now that people are routinely smeared, fired, and jailed for what they share online, should you still be so cavalier?

Right now, everyone's aware of how little privacy everybody else has in the Internet age.

We're all aware of it, but few of us care. Most people are actually pretty cavalier about their privacy.

Most people are on social media. A lot of people want to be big on social media. Pictures of their lives, videos, and so on. They want to blow up and get all those sweet, transitory thumbs up from random people.

Trading privacy for social approval is an attractive prospect when you are younger. I did it; a lot of people do it.

There is an important thing to understand about privacy though, and it is that the stuff you put out there to help you (by making you look cool, giving you a stage to stand on, and the like) can also come back to bite you.

It is important, especially while you're in your more self-focused, self-aggrandizing period of life (typically your teens and early-to-mid-twenties) to do everything with privacy in mind.

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his One Date System.

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Comments

Mike's picture

It's clever the way you grouped together Britain and Iran to make a point

Tony Depp's picture

I've been on the receiving end of social media lynch mobs. At the time it was because of an article I wrote comparing girls in Asia to Westerners. It went viral in my city. Before I knew it, sjw's were doing everything in their power to destroy my life, get me fired, ruin my relationships.

They went for my job (I'm self employed)
They scoured my blog and social media for quotes to take out of context. They made a collage of six years of quotes that made me look like the world's biggest woman hater.
They messaged my Sister, and tried to find my grand parents, parents, you name it. Though they were unsuccessful.

It got so bad it ended up in local print media, and even on the feminist website Jezebel.

What did I say that was so horrible? The article said that asian women in general were more feminine than western women. Maybe not in such an elegant manner.

It had real life consequences. I was banned from several bars and cafe's, by people who recognized my photos from social media. This was also shortly after I was on the front page of my local news paper for something unrelated, and that's why I was being scrutinized in the first place.

To this day, I still have several of these lunatics that monitor me, looking for any quote they can take out of context.

Also, everyone has a high definition video camera and voice recorder in their pocket. EVERYONE. During this time, on more than one occasion I caught people sneaking pictures of me in public. I get that's how it is. But can you imagine being really famous?

Lots of guys wish they could have my job. To write about game, travel the world, teach pickup. But it comes at a cost. Because of my Internet history, I'm near unemployable in any normie industry. I won't be holding a job at Whole Foods, that's for sure. Not because of my evil pickup artist past.

And I'm fine with that. I see it now as a valuable experience for what I can expect should I ever become famous.

One of the best things I did, a few years ago I quit using Facebook and Twitter.

Great article Chase.

Axe Rogue's picture

I think the majority of people just go about their lives when it comes to non-PC things. But with the internet, these fringe, extremist few can amplify their voices and extend their reach. But yeah, these times really suck when it comes to tolerance. The pendulum is swinging back. People are so tolerant, they are intolerant. Their view is the only one and if you disagree, you're racist/homophobic/sexist/etc. It's too much.

The media really makes things worse, stirring the pot, magnifying things even more, outraging people more with tweets from decades ago.

But glad to see you made it to the other side well, Tony.

SippyCup's picture

Great article, Chase. I’ve been off socials for awhile now and simply don’t miss it.

I know you probably don’t want to tread too far into commenting on other figures, but I’m somewhat surprised you don’t like Jordan Peterson. Personally I like Jordan Peterson the professor, if that makes sense.

I really dislike what dogmatic people have turned him into in terms of his public image, I doubt he wants to be seen as a guru either, though my guess is as good as anyones.

I won’t begrudge you if you don’t respond, but might I ask what about him you don’t like? I think he’s brilliant, though there’s plenty of things hes said that I’m not in agreement with, that just makes him like anyone else to me though.

Cheers!

John Greco's picture

Hey Chase,

Quite thought provoking article, as always thanks for the great content. I'm really curious about what you don't like about Peterson. If someone asked me Id bet you d have a good opinion of him. The reason is because what he teaches have great overlap with what you teach. He talks about taking responsibility (against victim mentality), about finding a purpose, about becoming a powerful human in order to be able to kind and many other things. Plus I'd say he's a fairly attractive guy with solid fundamentals. I'm not saying that I agree with everything he says but still, as I'm finishing his book 12 rules for life, I've come to consider him a master thinker and philosopher. But - I want to follow what he preaches and assume you know something that I don't and ask - in a completely non-aggressive way - what do you think is wrong with him?

Cheers

the emerald archer's picture

Hey Chase,

Really eye-opening article. I liked that part about comparing Social Media to the police and that clip about why you shouldn't talk to the police. I had a close call with law enforcement once and have learned since not to talk to them.

I was just curious, what is it about Jordan Peterson that you don't like? I don't agree with the stuff he says about dating and women where you should only "pick one" because it's the typical conservative rubbish about being a betrayal to society and whatnot.

But I think he has a lot of good points on the political climate and topics like income inequality, wealth redistribution, modern feminism and the authoritarian left. Is it the way he made his money and got popular that you're skeptical of?

the emerald archer's picture

Hey Chase,

Really eye-opening article. I liked that part about comparing Social Media to the police and that clip about why you shouldn't talk to the police. I had a close call with law enforcement once and have learned since not to talk to them.

I was just curious, what is it about Jordan Peterson that you don't like? I don't agree with the stuff he says about dating and women where you should only "pick one" because it's the typical conservative rubbish about being a betrayal to society and whatnot.

But I think he has a lot of good points on the political climate and topics like income inequality, wealth redistribution, modern feminism and the authoritarian left. Is it the way he made his money and got popular that you're skeptical of?

Axe Rogue's picture

Great read! Could not agree more. It's like my mom says: Master of what you don't say. Slave to what you do say. Sounds better in Spanish.

Even in the corporate world, you can't share too much. This bit me hard. I voiced things to "friends", my "brothers in arms" that ended up getting me in very hot water with my boss. Long story short, it broke me. But I learned a valuable lesson. Keep your personal and work lives separate. Coworkers are not your friends. Common sense I know.

Social media is a megaphone, yes, but I think it's best to keep in mind that it starts with our mouth. Even if it seems innocuous, innocent, don't share it. As far as my new coworkers are aware, I don't exist outside of work, for the most part. Best kept that way. It's easy to blur the lines when you spend 40 hours a week with them.

Anonymous 's picture

Hey Chase,

I'm really against social media as well and love to be off it.

these questions I'm going to ask aren't to try to convince you or anything, but I have seen a lot from people becoming successful on social media and wanted to know your thoughts on people really making money from it and other questions as well.

1.What is really wrong with people mentally that love social media and give up all of their privacy for free? and why are there many few people who don't like social media at all? why are there only a few to so many?

2. I know you say you aren't on social media, but aren't you technically? you have a YouTube and typing your name on Google brings you write up and shows what you talk about easy.

a girl might not read your articles, but what if they look you up by just putting your name in and find out your profession?

girls always do that.

3. how about your YouTube channel and the guys that talk on it? are they not safe from the stuff you talk about from your article? Is it different for them? if so how?

4. I have seen a good amount of people who went from poor to rich using YouTube. They went from broken everything and cheap clothes to buying foreign cars, clothes, big houses, to even selling their own merchandise as well. they also used that money to do real estate and investments.

I've seen it a lot and these guys have 200k-8mil subscribers and they all are living good and they have for years.

it was like they just picked up a camera, made videos, and became rich in weeks to a month.

they also haven't said anyone tried to do anything to them in public and they walk around the time and vlog like normal people. sometimes fans come up to them, but not ever any hate or being targeted. why do you think that is?

but like I said earlier; I have seen so many people who were so broke and got YouTube rich out of nowhere, some even got a foot in the door in the entertainment industry or even have careers in them because of social media and YouTube.

I've seen people become musicians (Justin biber and others) people have brand deals with sneaker companies making 100k+ a year, people getting products early to review and get paid by both the company and youtube.

do you know why they have so much money if getting a lot of money isn't that common on youtube?

5. what if you approach a girl and she tries or someone tries to film you and put you on social media, even if you don't have any? that could happen and what do you do if that does and you want to still live a life of privacy?

a person could not have any social media, but approach a girl and have her or someone else record him and if he fails, what can he do now? he'll be known as that forever and it's not his fault?

so how does that not affect a guy like that and still live a normal life? how does he avoid it if possible?

6. how does Facebook have a shadow profile of you if you never made one before and aren't mentioned on it like that by anyone else?

7. I don't really think it's fair to compare a YouTube making 60k a month to that news chick or anyone else that's really rich and famous. I mean if the Jordan Peterson guy was going to be a rich guy in entertainment, wouldn't he already be there? and it probably is too late for him at the time to even get to where the #1 people are in the entertainment industry.

him making 60k a month is better than him doing anything else he could do I'm sure.

I don't know anything about the dude or the chick, but I think that it would be 100xs harder for him to make it where she's at compared to where he was at. all he had to do was just make videos from his home and keep putting content out, people in the entertainment industry have way more competition and hurdles to go through compared to making videos from home.

I'd like for you to discuss more about this please because I think 60k a month is great for someone who would not make that at all and would even have a harder chance at making it anywhere in the entertainment industry or being number 1 anywhere else.

8. Isn't social media and YouTube good for business? you use youtube I'm sure to get your name out there, others use youtube as free marketing. they try to make popular videos and after that they try to use their popularity to sell their products; like fitness people for example. so is social media good in that sense? for free marketing and money?

tbh I don't see any other way people can get rich that quickly unless it's from social media. other businesses take a long time to grow and have a worse chance than just starting a YouTube and being seen then using it to have your followers buy from you, and the start up cost of starting an online business or YouTube is almost nil compared to other ways to make money from a business.

it also doesn't cost a lot of money to be on YouTube either.

do you think your privacy is worthy it when it comes to a person who is broke or tired of the rat race to make a YouTube and hopefully get big and get money to change their entire life and be self employed to create what they want?

do you think that's worth it? please let me know your thoughts.

Thanks Chase

Jack's picture

Chase, great article. I must say, I am very surprised to hear you’re not a fan of Jordan Peterson. What don’t you like about him?

Risenin2019's picture

1. In a lot of industries, you HAVE to have a social media page. Try getting a job in sales or marketing but not having LinkedIn. As a matter of fact, employers will hold it against you if you are not on social media and they cannot find you because they will think you are "hiding something". I know, been in the recruiting world myself, a young person with a nice IG page and good (keyword) social media presence always gets the job over someone who is not on social media. Only exception is high finance and other super cliquey worlds where an Ivy League degree gets you in.

2. Even 2k extra a month is A LOT of money on top of a full time job, I live in NYC, an extra 2k a month is the difference between having fun and getting by. You have to understand these influencers do what they do on top of having full time jobs that pay well enough.

3. Girls WILL think it is weird if you are not on IG or Snapchat, in fact, have fun trying to meet a girl from a dating app who is trying to make sure you are not catfishing her. No social media? You don't exist.

4. Every celebrity or public figure IS on Instagram on social media, they have to monitor their social presence.

Housecards 's picture

Great piece! Thoughtful and useful. Wish I had known it five years ago.

This post is mainly about social media, but Chase what about other internet services that could potentially hammer your privacy? For example, search, email, or even LinkedIn (which is kind of a social media, but it’s more like a profile where you display info you think might be useful). I am no expert on what Google needs to do to pull in more digital ads dollars, but I use their stuff like multiple hours a day. How does one deal with it?

Here are a few simple things I can think of and have employed to protect privacy:
- use Apple devices over PC/Android
- use Safari incognito to browse not-feeling-so-morally-right stuff
- avoid Google search with google account logged in

But still, if Google or Amazon were to compile a profile for me, they could get it pretty accurate on what I like and what my Internet habits are. How do you deal with this aspect of privacy where you leave your mark while treading the Web?

Robert McDermott's picture

I am widower and trying to date,but my game is rusty. How does an older person use your young person method ?

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