Decision Making in Seduction III: Building and Keeping Momentum

Negative sexual momentum can spoil your interactions with women. But a good decision-making strategy helps break the trend – and can even reverse it.

Hey, guys. Welcome back. I hope you are enjoying this series on decision making so far. Making good decisions is key if you plan on reaching consistency in your results and increasing your odds of getting that girl.

Sometimes you will be stuck in situations where you will have to make calls, and you had better make the right one — making good or bad calls in these situations means the difference between a lay and no lay.

Today I will add a few more words on decision making, an expansion to my previous post. I will be sharing with you a few examples of mini-reports from the field where I have found myself in tricky situations and been forced to make decisions. I will share both success stories and failures.

Good Calls and Bad Calls

You won’t always make good calls — after all, it is impossible to predict the future. I sometimes make dumb calls. I misjudge situations, or sometimes I make a good call and things just don’t work out. But I do learn from my mistakes. Even if I make a good call, sometimes bad luck just happens. Get over it. Of course, success must be assessed, too, as there are many valuable lessons to be learned from it.

Forget the idea that you will always make the right calls. It just isn’t going to happen. However, with this post, as well as plenty of field experience, you may eventually grow to become a better decision maker. Hopefully, the examples I give will grant you a better understanding of the process. Sometimes, examples are the best lessons.

Becoming a good decision maker will remove the “get lucky” aspect of your seductions. I am not implying that you will get less lucky, but rather that you will become less dependent on luck and more in control of situations.

Many guys get laid by getting lucky — the stars align and the cosmos of seduction grant them some vagina. The calls they make just happen to be the right ones. Many times, they probably don’t make deliberate decisions, it all just works out.

If you desire to just let go and let the cosmos sort things out for you, then fine — there is no need for you to read this post. But if you want to gain more control and power over your success, read on.

Sometimes, the universe just hates your guts and will throw spanners into the works that you will have to deal with. However, sometimes those bad nights can be cured with good decision making.

Social Momentum and Decision Making

One does not exclude the other. Obviously, positive social momentum (feeling socially warm, happy, comfortable, and sociable) and making good calls is ideal. All of this will affect your seductions positively. But sometimes you will have poor momentum.

Macro-Momentum

Perhaps you will experience negative macro-momentum, which can be defined as the momentum you experience during dry spells. It is the vicious cycle caused by long periods of inactivity or a succession of negative experiences ruining your confidence. It is the biggest picture, the overall period of your life where you are either doing great with women, or you're not. We all experience ebbs and flows. I also have periods where I do better than others — it is totally normal.

The difference that takes place when you become better with women is not that you will always be on top, but rather that you realize the following:

• Poor momentum will have less impact — you may get fewer good results, but you will still get some

• The periods of poor macro-momentum become shorter

• Some periods are better than others, so don't beat yourself up too hard when experiencing bad ones (it only make matters worse)

Now, how does this affect decision making? Well, suppose you are doing badly. You haven’t gotten laid in a while. You start becoming bitter and your subconscious mind starts to forget what a pussy feels like. Your sex drive drops and your motivation follows.

You may head out, which is a good decision because poor momentum is cured through going out and fighting it until the pendulum swings back to positive momentum. Staying home and jacking off to porn doesn’t solve anything. Going out and trying to get laid is what helps.

Of course, you need to figure out what you’re doing right, but more importantly, what you are doing wrong. Then try to fix the problem. The key here is that one usually becomes better at pickup when practicing in periods of low momentum, because you are playing with a handicap, your vibe is off, and you get nothing for free.

Compare this to when you are on fire. When your vibe, body language, and delivery are on point, you will not be forced to play things by the book. You will get away with more. So practicing during periods of poor momentum still makes you better, because you are more focused on doing things perfectly.

Anyway, that was a short digression. So how does decision making relate to macro-momentum? We already covered that simply going out is one call, but other examples include:

• Go to a venue in which you are comfortable. You are not in your best state, so perhaps trying out a new venue may be too much (going to a new venue requires balls — balls you may not have because of poor macro-momentum).

• Don’t keep doing things that don't work for you. Perhaps your venue has gone downhill. Try sticking to the familiar first — if that doesn’t work, change it up.

• The same thing applies to women. Go for the type of women you are familiar with, but be willing to try something else if that doesn’t work out.

• Stick to the techniques you are comfortable with. But try to perfect them. Again, in times of low momentum, you get away with less, hence your technique needs to be on point and perfect.

• If a technique isn't working, try new things. Repeating things that don't work is dumb.

In my opinion, the most important decision to make during a period of poor momentum is to lower your standards a bit. I am not much of a fan of screening for “easy” women; it’s not ideal. That said, I do believe it’s an amazing strategy and a good decision, because it will get you laid. And once you get laid, you build up some momentum. You start small by going for a less-ideal girl, because it’s better than nothing. “Nothing” does nothing for your momentum — duh.

But “something” does, and a lay is something. Getting a lay will restart your lowered sex drive, which is usually a result of your subconscious having forgotten about pussy. Therefore, a reminder is good. It can also motivate you to pursue things further.

Progressively, you up your standards and bang hotter and hotter women. Positive momentum leads to better confidence, vibe, and delivery. All these will affect your results, and you will be able to get the truly hot girls. The higher the momentum, the easier it is to get many hot girls. And usually, the higher the momentum, the hotter the girl. If an average-but-cool girl can contribute to this, she is going to be worth a lot to you, indirectly becoming your key to hotter women. She may even be cool and good in bed. Who knows? Lowering your standards during a period of poor momentum can be the decision that saves you from it.

Micro-Momentum

Micro-momentum, compared to macro-momentum, can be defined as your momentum during a specific night out, rather than the overall momentum of a certain period. Micro-momentum is often defined as state that relates to good nights versus bad nights. Good nights are defined by “good state” (the nights you feel awesome), and bad nights by “bad state” (where you feel like a lump of dung).

Again, we all have our bad nights. The difference between good and bad seducers is that good seducers accept that fact and don’t beat themselves up about it. They will also do better during bad nights out because their overall game is better. It doesn’t matter whether we are talking macro- or micro- momentum; bad momentum messes up your vibe and can make you feel allowed to accept worse results. But good game is good game, and if you have better game, you will get better results in times of both positive and negative momentum.

Good seducers also have better state control, but there are limits to how much you can better your state in field.

But what can save your ass during a time of poor micro-momentum? Good decision making. If your momentum is low, yet you make good decisions, you may still get laid!

Make the right calls, and your lower energy may not be a problem.

The truth is, decision making is not that affected by your momentum. Decisions are logical calls. If you stay aware and understand the situation, you will make good calls. Good calls will not be affected by your vibe. Sure, emotions can affect your decisions, but you must truly feel awful to be unable to make decisions such as changing venues, targets, and strategy.

So, good decision making can compensate for a bad night, and it works wonders. However, if you still feel down, try these pointers:

• Accept that bad nights happen
• Practice state control: eat healthy, get hydrated, do in-field meditations, etc.
• Focus on making good calls

I have noticed that when I am not in state, I usually always get laid out of either pure luck (rare) or making good decisions. An example of this was the one I presented in my previous post when I was not in the mood and performed poorly in the first venue. I then made a call to change venues to one I was more comfortable at — and I pulled.

Decision Making Examples

I will now give some examples of decision making. These are scenarios I have dealt with, both lately and in the past. The examples will entail both good and bad calls.

Also, these are not necessarily scenarios of decision making when in low state or poor momentum. Some are also scenarios where I felt on fire. No matter how you feel, decision making is key. It just happens to be more key when you aren't feeling good.

Scenario #1: Good Target Choice

So, this was a night I felt terrible. I decided to head to this venue. My state was low. I saw this not-so-hot, girl. She wasn’t intimidating at all, I swear. I approached, and she was happy to get approached. I kept talking to her. Now, guess what happened next? Four of her hot friends showed up. The girl I approached bought a bottle, and I sat there with, yes, 1 fat girl, but also 4 hot girls who loved me.

How do I look now? Good. What happened? Social proof. What happened next? I got in the mood, I looked good, and girls in the club desired me. I tried to hit on one of the hotter girls, but it didn’t work out. It seemed like they wanted their fat friend to hook up with me — some form of sis-code. Either way, I went to the bar to fetch water. On the way, this cute girl smiled at me. She happened to be equally as hot as the fat girl’s friends. We made out and left the club together shortly after.

Good call? Yes. Why? Approaching the “easy girl” created social momentum as well as social proof.

Scenario #2: Dumb Venue Change

This one is from last summer. Pablo Garcia and I had started going out together a lot, becoming amazing friends and good wings. We have pulled a lot together, but before we got fully in sync, we did make some mistakes. We went to this high-end venue. We hooked a lot — we had so many leads. The club photographer was so impressed that he took a lot of pictures of us.

But I got the wacked-up idea to use the momentum from this venue (which admittedly I was not that comfortable with) and venue change to one I was comfortable in. I thought that, with the momentum from the first venue, pulling from the second venue would be a piece of cake.

Once we arrived at the second venue, it was dead, and it sucked. What a mood drop, just seeing that.

Bad call, obviously. The moral of the story is clear: if you are in a club and you are doing well, stay. Don’t risk it, hoping the grass is greener elsewhere. We surely learned from this mistake.

Scenario #3: Staying Out

I was so dead tired this one night out. I was still recovering from the flu and I’d had sex the previous night. When I've pulled the night before, not only does my sex drive drop, I’m also usually sleep deprived from girls starfishing in my bed and stealing pillows.

I wasn’t doing too well, but I stayed until the bitter end. My mood was “meh”, but I eventually bumped into this introverted girl who obviously didn’t mind my low vibe. I probably came across as slightly introverted — a good thing in this case. She looked nerdy with big tits and a tiny waist. I like this combination. An awkward interaction took place. We went home and banged.

One more introduction can lead to wondrous things (awkwardness optional).

Good call, obviously. The moral here is to man up and be a soldier.

Scenario #4: Not Making a Call

I once had this super-hot MILF pouring sexy noises into my ear to describe how she orgasmed. She was decent looking and obviously up for it. So why didn’t I go for it? Well, I had this hot Brazilian showing interest. She was dead gorgeous. However, she was playing a bit hard to get.

I couldn’t make up my mind, so I tried to switch between them (giving one attention before switching to the other). I ended up getting neither.

Lesson: make a decision and stick to it, unless something proves the decision wrong or another amazing opportunity arises.

Scenario #5: Dumb Ejection

I went to this nice venue and met two hot Icelandic girls. I had a major hook with one of them. She sat outside with me for 30 minutes in the cold and had a deep, sexual talk with me. A guy I met out there took care of the friend, and he also reached compliance with her.

The girls wanted to leave. Of course, we were both invited to join them. But during the extraction phase, the dude I’d just met decided to spam-approach his chick. Why the hell would you do that during extraction? He obviously wasn’t a good decision maker. So, we left him — he was mad about it when I accidentally bumped into him a few days later.

Anyway, the girls wanted to go to this awful venue. They were more than happy to invite me in, it was late after all. But no, like an over-confident idiot, I left for another venue, alone, so sure that I would find something better. Of course, I did not.

Moral of the story: got a good lead? Stick to it. Despite having to deal with a 2-set, I could have perhaps managed to pimp the friend to another dude. Or maybe the cosmos of the universe would have solved the issue for me. But one thing is certain — leaving them led to nothing.

Scenario #6: Smart Ejection

So, on a night where I felt amazing, I had this girl literally screaming in my ear to screw her after some sex talk. The issue was... she wasn't really that hot.

I ejected. Good call, because I met a hotter girl — a way hotter girl — and spent an amazing night with her.

Lesson: if you feel awesome and on fire, have social proof, and the night is good, do not lower your standards. In fact, raise them up. You can lower your standards if the night is poor (i.e., there are few hot girls) or when you feel like hurl. We discussed this earlier.

Scenario #7: Another Smart Ejection

I approached this girl and things seemed to work out great. We talked, I hooked. I isolated. I escalated and we made out. Things were going great. I tried to extract. I got a no. I take a step back, I don’t acknowledge her resistance. I then try again later after building more compliance. No luck. I start “punishing” by showing less interest. She starts showing more compliance. I tried to pull, it still didn’t work out. I persist one more time. Damn — nothing worked!

I decided to leave the girl and approach another one. I hooked this new girl quite well, and as she started touching and smiling as I interacted with her, the first girl showed up and asked me, “When are we leaving?”

Right now, baby.

Sometimes, when nothing works, moving on is a better call (but best used as a last resort).

Scenario #8: Smart Venue Change

I went to this venue feeling great, but my sort-of-stalker showed up and ruined my night (as she often tries to do). I really felt like being in this venue that night, but I did not feel like seeing her. I knew she would darken my mood beyond recovery. So I snuck out, headed to this other venue, and hooked up with a 19-year-old blonde with silver eyes. She was good in bed, too.

If a wildcard you cannot manage shows up, leave the venue.

“Hey, where'd he go? Like, how can I sabotage him if he's not even here?”

Strategic Choices (Calibration)

Pick the right strategy for each venue. I have written in-depth about strategic decision making regarding venue calibration and which types of venues are good for meeting girls.

If the venue is loud, focus on non-verbals. If the dance floor has a hook-vibe, some space, and it isn’t too chaotic, you might do some dance-floor seduction. If the venue is small, you could build social proof. If it is a quiet venue or has a great lounge or smoking area, you can use verbals.

The same goes for strategic choices regarding seduction; it's the overall game plan, which is based on calibration. I will not say much on this here, only that strategic choices related to the seduction process is related to:

• Your baseline assumption about who she is, her personality type, etc.
• Her reactions to your move
• The context you find yourself in
• Your timing — are you doing the right things at the right time?

Calibration is closely related to decision making.

Recap

Today we discussed decision making and how it affects momentum:

• When experiencing low momentum, decision making becomes more important.
• When experiencing low momentum, you need to make good decisions, like maybe lowering your standards a bit until you regain momentum. You also need to get out.
• We discussed how good decision making can save you from a woeful evening.

We also shared 8 examples of decision making, discussing both good and bad decisions.

That’s all for today. I hope you enjoyed this short series on decision making. Next week, I'll do an in-depth post on dealing with wildcards, where decision making plays a key role. So stay hyped, because it’s gonna be juicy.

Questions and comments are always welcome.

Best,

Alek