Intermediates can get dates and are beginning to have some level of social success
Part II of Varoon’s and my two-parter on relationships sees us
discuss, in a 90+ minute podcast, a huge range of different subjects on
running long-term relationships and monogamy.
A selection of topics Varoon and I discuss:
This should be a fun one.
Slightly advanced. Not too advanced. This should be fine for intermediates on up.
So, this revolves around not boyfriend zoning yourself when screening girls for something quick.
As you may know if you read this site regularly, it’s good and important to screen girls:
... and after you screen, it’s important to qualify:
Screening and qualifying is important for a variety of reasons, not the least of which is making sure you end up with girls you’ll be happy to be with.
Another reason it’s important though is for making a girl feel like there’s a reason you like her. If she feels like you are trying to sleep with her and she doesn’t understand why, you’re going to end up with attainability problems on your hands (because she’s going to follow Occam’s Razor and assume if you’re interested in her without communicating a good reason for being interested in her, it’s simply because she’s a random piece of ass).
So, you’ve got to screen.
Yet how you screen – particularly when you’re trying to put together something fast – is important.
In this video, I tell you how my perspectives on women have changed over the 10 years I have been meeting and picking up women. I also point out some of the ways beginners think about picking up girls that aren’t always the most helpful, and share with you some alternate mindsets you can use when you go out to meet girls:
Over the years, I’ve urged you to do less for girls and not be so eager to please:
Some of the other writers on this site have urged you to do this as well:
Yet,
there is a flip side to this too;
and that is that the man who
is too stingy with his effort
appears petty, tryhard,
and socially stunted.
If you’re too much of a compliance miser, girls sense it’s because you fear being too nice. Which can send them into auto-rejection... when they realize you’re deliberately refusing to do for them out of a desire to hold onto power and control (as opposed to, say, not doing for them because you just don’t comply a lot because you’re a free man, outcome independent, and do only what you want to do).
What’s the right balance to strike, then?
How much should you do for girls... as opposed to how much should you not?
That’s what this article is about: how to strike the right balance with your effort.
Hey guys!
Here is another reflection of mine. Lately I have discussed with other well-experienced seducers about “meaningfulness” in seduction – a topic that has really caught my attention lately.
What is the meaning of all this?
Many men tend to look at this in a very black and white fashion – as in either sleeping with lots of different women or settling down with one particular girl.
Truth is, it doesn’t have to be that black and white. This post will briefly discuss the pros and cons before covering an alternative to those forms of lifestyle – a lifestyle I and a few other seducers are discussing or even endorsing.
Several times over the years, both on this site and in our newsletter, I’ve discussed compliments: both how to compliment, as well as when to do it, what compliments work best, and even a few nonverbal tricks to make your compliments more convincing.
Despite that, I notice most guys still don’t compliment much, and I suspect this is largely due to a few common fears around complimenting:
I’m not going to tell you those fears are preposterous, because those things do happen.
However, I will tell you those fears are most likely overblown.
And I’m also going to tell you that if you even have these fears at all, you have little to worry about when it comes to paying compliments.
Let’s tackle some of these concerns though, and address what’s behind them.
content="If a girl doesn’t think you’re in control, her attraction and respect for you suffer. Yet, you needn’t be the uptight in-control guy to show her this.">
That sounds like a power-mad, insecure, control-freak title for an article, doesn’t it?
“She always needs to think you’re in control.”
Pretty outdated, right?
Especially in a world in which more men consider ‘masculinity’ a bad thing than a good thing:
In truth, we get plenty of guys who stumble upon Girls Chase articles (and mine in particular) who object to just this advice:
But this article isn’t so much about WHY you must lead, nor much about HOW to lead.
If you want to know more about that subject, check these articles out:
Rather, this article is about keeping up appearances, and not giving a girl the impression that the guy she’s with is floating along, doesn’t have a clue, or is abdicating leadership of the courtship... whether to her, to Mother Nature, or to fate, luck, hope, or chance.
She always needs to think you are in control.
Because if she doesn’t, she ain’t hanging around.
Today I will just discuss something that I have been thinking about a lot lately – namely, your hookup standards. By standards I am referring to the different elements or traits in a woman that you enjoy, making you willing to pursue her.
Standards are very personal, meaning that there is a subjective element to them. Remember that at the end of the day, you decide which women you want to put effort into.
This post will just be a reflection over standards and not make any claims about what is right or wrong, but rather what choices will give you the most success in the long run. It is the practical element that I am about to discuss.
The perspective of this post is to discuss how one can either:
Get laid as much as possible
Increase your chances of finding the right women for longer relationships.
Or both… (Hell, why not!)
Anyway, let us get on with it.
This year I’ve been busy; really busy. I perform standup seven nights a week, I’m in law school, and I’m a powerlifter. This shortage of spare time has meant I’ve had to change how I approach getting new women in my life.
I’m sure being busy is something that many of you can relate to. That’s why I’ve written this post, which will tell you the best ways to integrate meeting beautiful women into your busy schedule.
Hi there. I hope everyone is doing well. Today we are focusing more on some theoretical stuff and less on beginner material.
This post is fit for everyone practicing cold approach pick up (the most exciting form of pick up, in my opinion).
I have in the past already discussed social momentum quite a few times already. Today we will also discuss momentum, but look at it from a different perspective: from a macro perspective.
Social momentum (micro) - discussed previously - covered how you felt; your emotional state when out meeting women. Positive social momentum could help one get laid, as he will not only feel more like interacting with strangers, but also be more comfortable doing so. When you have (micro) social momentum, you feel like an unbeatable god, as you:
Approach more women, feeling on fire
Have bigger balls and are bold in your approach, as you don't really care all that much about rejections
You will in many cases be more high energy and hook more girls (as you will come across as more exciting) - the pitfall here is that you will have to tone it down when getting into "seduction mode" (unless you want to end up being perceived as a dancing monkey)
You will feel more confident
If you have been out in the field a few times, you have probably already reached this type of momentum. I will not cover "how you get there" in this post, as I have covered this aspect already a few times. If you need advice on how to reach social momentum, then check out these post:
