(2) Intermediate

Hey everyone.

Today I wanted to discuss a very important form of confidence that is rarely mentioned, yet is a KEY factor in your success with women. We are here talking about sexual confidence.

I will first discuss what it is and how it will affect your success with women, then I will give some suggestions on how you can become sexually confident – i.e., tell you how to get there. So this post will be a mix of theory and practical elements.

Today’s article will focus on three different forms of touch for use in similar situations (mostly as greetings... hello and goodbye):

• Hugs
• Handclasps (note: not handshakes)
• And your arm on (or around) her shoulder

With each tactic, we’ll look at when these work best, when they can backfire, how exactly to use them, and what their pros and cons are.

So get yourself into a touchy-feely mood and let’s get to it.

Every day I read questions on different forums saying things like “I love this girl so much, what should I do?” This kind of question irritates me. It irritates me because you can’t love something you aren’t committed to. I don’t care what kind of fantasy you have in your head, if you haven’t made a move on her, you don’t love her. Why? Because if you actually strongly desired her you would have made a move; you would have committed yourself to a certain course of action.

Our culture has become obsessed with thinking and not doing. We obsess over the fantasy of doing something great but rarely commit ourselves to doing great things. Invariably, every guy I’ve met who is good with women knows how to commit. I’m not talking about being exclusive, I’m talking about acting on his desires.

Many guys have passion only in the mind, but their lives are listless. This indecisiveness disgusts women. The higher the quality to the woman, the lower her tolerance will be for listlessness. The indecisiveness that plagues this generation comes from the fact that we have so much information at our disposal. Data that supports both sides of every argument. Many men look for proof before they act, and that may work well in science but it is a horrible way of going about bedding beautiful women.

This post will be part practical advice and part philosophical treatise. I will begin with the practical advice and then move to the more theoretical elements on my philosophy of commitment.

Women are constantly putting things you say into categories. They are looking at what you say not only for content but for what you’re trying to get across too.

• “He said that because he’s trying to show off that he’s smart.”
• “He told me that because he’s trying to get me alone.”

Most guys are unaware of this layer of communication, which leads to them making clumsy mistakes. But I’m not writing this article to talk about the clumsy mistakes you might be making in conversation, I’m writing this article for you to learn how to look at conversations the same way a woman does.

Adding this layer will make it easier for you to see why women say some of the things they do. It will also help you give a woman exactly what she wants, when she wants it (which is the fastest way to get what you want). At the end of this article, I share a painful story that was the catalyst for me writing this.

Note from Chase: This is our first article from Francesco Toggianini, our first contributor from Italy. Francesco’s joining us for a four-article series trial, and if you like his articles and he keeps the quality up, we will bring him on as a regular contributor. Here’s Francesco, with his first article, on getting her to kiss you back.

The title of the article itself contains an important implication: you go for the kiss first, and then the girl kisses you back. It is your job to make the first move. Forget about this truth, and you’ve forgotten about the most important quality of a man: leading the interaction.

Most of the results I’ve achieved in this game have come after I realized the overall importance of leading, and started to apply that insight infield. Leading could be the subject of an entire new article, but today we are talking about kisses and make-outs, so let’s dive a bit deeper into that.

“Get up.

“Stand up for just a second.

“Step over here please, I want to show you something.

“Okay, now turn around – eh! Not so fast. Turn around slowly.

“Hmm, okay, you’ll do. So tell me how this friend screwed you over exactly.”

Ever wonder why leading women and getting investment from them is such a lynchpin of seduction?

In all honesty, you can take a woman who’s completely unattracted to you, and if you can get her to follow your lead well enough, you can take her to bed and take her as your lover. I’ve done it plenty of times.

It’s nice when she’s into you. But it’s nice to know you’ve got options too, even when she isn’t.

However, if you don’t understand why leading like this, and getting buy-in and compliance like this is so crucially important to your success rate with girls, you’re going to miss a lot of opportunities to use it where you really should be using it.

So why’s it so vital?

I’ve tried to pin down what separates guys who have success with women and guys who don’t. I’ve come to the conclusion that guys who have good game have better intuition when it comes to women.

They notice the escalation windows, they know when to go for the kiss, and they know how to get her to bed. Naturals act on this intuition naturally. Guys like me had to earn through repeated failure and reading literature on the subject.

This article will break down how to develop a natural’s sexual intuition.