(2) Intermediate

When looking back at all my experience with girls, there are a couple of events that still haunt me. Not because I got rejected, not because I bombed out, but because I was so close and failed.

The failure wasn’t due to there being poor logistics, nor was it a rogue friend that pulled her away. These failures were the result of me not standing up at the right moment and being a dominant man. I either pushed off the responsibility on one of my wingmen or the girl. Well, in life and in game, no one is going to do the work for you. This is why I have adopted the mantra “If they won’t, I will.”

This post is going to be set up a little different from my other posts. I am going to bring up two instances where I failed to stand up and take responsibility. I hope the lessons from my nightmares can help your dreams come true.

In the last segment of the Practical Female Psychology series, we discussed how and why females developed the language of Subcommunication and how it gets used by women today.

We learned how women are often Ambivalent; that is, a woman will communicate in such a way so as to cause confusion in the male mind, make sure she keeps her options open, and attract resources and romantic affection from as many avenues as possible without crossing the line into social ostracism, where she risks getting labeled a “slut”.

We also learned how the men who best succeed with women understand this secret female language, and in turn have learned the art of Discretion, which is basically a conspiracy to allow females to operate in that certain way without any hindrance.

Today we’ll discuss Subcommunication as it relates to the dangers and opportunities surrounding dating in the workplace; why no matter how much you learn about females, you still want to talk like a man does; and some more practical tips for mastering the fine art of interacting with females.

Among men studying the social arts, women’s ultimate goal is often misinterpreted as the pursuit of sex.

In this article I will describe their real goal and how it is often distorted by those in some form of a scarcity mindset. We will also go much deeper than this, as we will be looking at your real goal as well as women’s.

To begin this subject, I can’t really delay introducing you to the ultimate goal, so, in the spirit of openness, here it is. But before you make your judgement upon it, read the rest of the article and see how your view of it changes.

The ultimate goal (of women AND men) is to free oneself from becoming frozen in fear of judgement… and to do this without hurting or taking advantage of others for one’s own comfort and ease.

I came home in a blind rage. I had seen my ex-girlfriend out with one of my friends and was ready to end both of them. I walked into my house with my fists clenched and sweat dripping from my forehead. My dad noticed and immediately pulled me aside asking me what was wrong. I lied and said nothing was wrong. But after a few more pointed questions from my father, I finally caved and said why I was so upset.

“Son, you have a jealousy problem.”

“No I don’t Dad!”

There was no reasoning with me; the emotion had consumed the rational part of my brain. I wasn’t Will, I was Jealous Will. That night my dad imparted a great deal of wisdom to me. It took me years to fully understand it and another couple years to embody it. That’s not to say I never get jealous anymore. But my episodes are now nothing more than a passing inconvenience.

With the help of my dad and my life experience, I have figured out ways to discharge jealousy quickly. I have also adopted a philosophy that makes it very difficult to feel jealous in the first place.

Before I venture further, I want to establish what this post isn’t. This post is not a guide to “keeping your girl in check” or “when your jealousy is a clue that she’s cheating”, this is just about your internal state and how to have a life of less jealousy.

My friend had just told me that he saw the girl I liked with another guy.

“I don’t get it man! I know that she likes me.”

“Bro, it’s because of this,” he said, pointing to his dark skin.

I responded saying, “What are you talking about man?”

“It’s because you’re black bro; girls like her only date white guys.”

Until that point I had not looked at dating through a racial lens. But after that day I started to become more “aware” of race and dating. I started “seeing” that white guys had it easier when it came to getting girls. It didn’t matter that I had dated many different races of girls before. It didn’t matter that I ended up dating the girl that we were talking about. That conversation had given me the ultimate excuse: that if a girl didn’t like me, it was because of my race.

It took me years to get away from that particular train of thought. It still creeps in from time to time, but as soon as I catch myself thinking like that now I cut that line of reasoning. So I will go ahead and answer the question that is on a lot of your minds right now.

Does race matter when it comes to dating? Yes.

Does it matter as much as people think it matters? No.

In this post, I will answer common questions I get from guys about race and dating; some advice for getting over racial insecurities and some stories from my journey.

Being able to take home a kind, beautiful girl anywhere in the world is every man’s dream. And why wouldn’t it be? How amazing is the feeling of touching down in a completely new land, being mesmerized by a host of lights, sights, and smells, and locking eyes with a woman who had only traipsed through your dreams before that moment?

It’s incredible. And I want you to be able to capture the feeling as often as you possibly can. But a lot of men make tactical miscalculation when they set out for the high seas (or skies). So let me share with you what I’ve learned from visiting six continents on this planet.

Whether you’re talking to a girl inside a club or inside your apartment, you are going to need to be an effective communicator.

Conversation is not only something you do to bond with girls, but it’s a tool to get her back to your place. Not saying the right thing at the beginning could result in her never giving you a chance. A boring conversation could have her walking away from you mid-sentence. If you can’t get her to feel comfortable at your place, you could fail right at the finish line.

So here is my hello to good morning conversation guide: