There’s a little-discussed concept in seduction called “backward rationalization”, where someone attributes reasons for a choice or action after-the-fact, rather than before it.
A simple example is you bring a girl home after a date and escalate on her, nearly to the point of sex. If you then have sex, there’s a good chance afterward she looks back and says, “Well, we had sex because he was attractive / charming / had a good body / etc.”
If on the other hand you do not have sex, there’s a fair chance she looks back after and says, “Well, we didn’t have sex because I wasn’t really that into him.”
In both cases, it may have simply been that you pushed a little harder to get past last minute resistance in the first scenario, and in the second you got winded and gave up. But the narrative she retains about why you slept together or didn’t is completely different.
Backward rationalization can mean the difference between her thinking you’re great or her thinking you’re not... all due to the outcome you achieve with her.
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