As Mating Complexity Increases, Do Reproductive Returns Diminish? | Girls Chase

As Mating Complexity Increases, Do Reproductive Returns Diminish?

Chase Amante

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mating complexity
Mating gets more complex as our societies become more complex. But as complexity rises, does the law of diminishing (reproductive) returns set in? (image source: Darwin Leo)

Bit of an abstract/sociological article here.

A little more academic than usual, too.

If you'd prefer tactics on dealing with an increasingly complex mating market, see my Game Imbalance Theory series. Otherwise, if you're down for a little academic sociology, let's proceed...

I'm reading through John Tainter's brilliant The Collapse of Complex Societies. Tainter's premise is civilization (or society, as he prefers to call it) is a problem-solving entity. As a society encounters new problems (like a food shortage or a militaristic neighbor) it adds new layers to itself, to address the problem (more intensive farming, or the training of a better military). These new layers make the society more complex.

As the society becomes more complex (to deal with more problems), it requires more resources. For a while it gets these through conquest or opening up new resource channels. Later it must get them by raising taxes on the population and by controlling more and more of its populace's lives. The further along this process it goes, the greater the demands on the society's support population become, and the smaller the returns on its increasing complexity get. It must demand more and more, to support greater and greater complexity, for less and less return.

As I've read Tainter, it's gotten me thinking about romantic relationships. There are some fascinating trends in dating, mating, and reproduction... trends like:

Anecdotally, the Battle of the Sexes seems to have reached fevered pitch, with many jilted women asking "where all the good men have gone" and many jilted men complaining they didn't go anywhere but were overlooked while these women were too busy "riding the cock carousel" (and now no longer want these "post-wall" women). This is something it's harder to quantify, but I've gone through a fair few newspaper advice columns from the 1880s through the 1950s and don't recall coming across anything close to this level of back-and-forthing between the sexes.

Divorce rates have skyrocketed, even as the availability of sex partners seemingly has too (I can't find much data on historical lifetime sex partners, unfortunately, but I find it hard to believe the average number of lifetime sex partners was "seven" in the 18th and 19th Centuries, as it is now -- though here's an interesting article on changing views on sexuality across the times).

As I looked at all this, I had to wonder: is the ever-increasing complexity of modern dating to blame for dating's shabbier and shabbier results overall for men and women alike?

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his One Date System.



JasonC0's picture

Hey Chase,

This was a great read. I think you should do more academic-type articles like this. Have you read "Sex At Dawn"? That book has made me rethink the Darwinian-based evolutionary model of mating behaviors. The book essentially disproves that model and most of what evolutionary biology says about mating patterns, such as commonly held beliefs like women wanting one man for her offspring while men conversely wanting to bed many women. I would highly recommend you of all people give it a read, considering your line of work and because it hits on a lot important points related to seduction and pickup.

Zanardi's picture

Now it all fits. I am from Romania and for a long time I had the impression that a number of concepts presented in GC seem not to apply too often or are an overkill. Attraction doesn't expire that fast, women here are more into dating than one night stands and, in the first case, it takes a few months until the newly formed couple has sex.


It perfectly fits with what you say here.

Will KZ's picture

Minor nitpick, but World War II did start 1940, though America became involved after 1941.

T's picture

The second world war started the 01.09.1939 with Hitler's attack on Poland.

Lawliet's picture

Hi Chase,

Thanks for the article.

I'm curious, how would you react when someone defys you?

Sometimes, we feel rightfully so that someone should act a certain way.

For example a younger family member respecting older ones, or a student respecting their teacher and behaves in a respectful way.

Another example more relevant to you may be commenters on your website who criticize your articles in a rude manner, or a "confrontational" tone. They may be correct factually but their presentation makes this a battle. Defyingly so.

This feeling can happen with family, friends or lovers.

But then there are times when they defy us. What would be a way to handle these situations without losing respect, but also in a high status man that is socially graceful?

Re: Are there any time when physical force is appropriate?

I know socially we are brought up to be "don't be violent" or keep our hands to ourselves. But then during our childhood, either we personally see it or personally involved, there are times when someone takes our things, and we physically wrestle with them to get it back. Or vice versa, we try that toy because our sibling has been hogging it the entire time.

And there are times when you constantly ask them and justifyingly so for something you feel you deserve to get, and yet they reject it. And so begins the children wrestling battle among the guys.

In adulthood, we naturally stop this (we can always visit local bars for a nostalgic reminiscence). It is clear in some situations, this is wrong (ex. domestic violence). But is there ever a right moment for this? Any personal experience?

The only situation I can think of that MIGHT be (if not, let me know) is if a kid boy took your belonging and you ask them to give it back, but they ignore you and shield the item away from you. Regardless of how much you ask (technically this is begging, which I guess wouldn't be the approach for adult interactions but kids are ok?), so you reach out and grab it out of their hands.

Calibration would apply to all those situations mentioned. Would love to hear your thoughts on them and also personal experiences if any.




SZ's picture

Are you saying that having a family will be more complex or getting sex the gc way will be more complex?? Or both??

My worry has me lost with my train of thought thinking dating will get harder than it is now.

Hopefully that's a long time from now where I will be top-tier.

I'm working on myself and making improvements and this has me worrying like a mother fucka.

Hope things will work out and we can keep using these methods.

Shit you just re-released one date, so I'm guessing we still have a lot of time left.

SZ's picture

So what do I gotta do right now to still reach my goals with life and women and not worry about this??

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