(3) Journeyman

There’s a little-discussed concept in seduction called “backward rationalization”, where someone attributes reasons for a choice or action after-the-fact, rather than before it.

A simple example is you bring a girl home after a date and escalate on her, nearly to the point of sex. If you then have sex, there’s a good chance afterward she looks back and says, “Well, we had sex because he was attractive / charming / had a good body / etc.”

If on the other hand you do not have sex, there’s a fair chance she looks back after and says, “Well, we didn’t have sex because I wasn’t really that into him.”

In both cases, it may have simply been that you pushed a little harder to get past last minute resistance in the first scenario, and in the second you got winded and gave up. But the narrative she retains about why you slept together or didn’t is completely different.

Backward rationalization can mean the difference between her thinking you’re great or her thinking you’re not... all due to the outcome you achieve with her.

A reader named Tom wrote in a short while back with the following question:

“Can you do an article of what a man should do when he has to compete with a badboy to attract a woman?
Many thanks for reading.”

Well, that’s an interesting one.

Especially considering so much of the content on Girls Chase is aimed at turning you into the bad boy.

But what happens when you’re head-to-head with a badder boy than you?

Howdy all,

Today I decided to take the time to answer a question related to escalation (being physical or verbal), and more in particular about calibration – calibrating escalation to the girl and the situation.

In other words, the readers were curious how one can escalate while limiting their chances of facing resistance.

Many students of seduction struggle when it comes to escalation, because they lack calibration and can easily blow things off if they do things wrong. Now, being perfectly calibrated is impossible, but great calibration skills come from experience.

However, in this post I will give you some tools that will make things easier for you.

Now onto the questions:

A reader who posted as Anonymous asked the following:

“I was thinking, what’s the difference between sleazy guy who talks about sex, using sexual frames, and escalating vs. sexy guy who talks about sex, using sexual frames and escalating.

And I read your sequence in “Physical escalation in Public” What happens when we escalate at the wrong sequence (too much)? thanks alek ;)”

In addition, Lawliet asked this:

“Nice article bro!

Anonymous said something interesting. Got me thinking.

Just wondering what happens when we escalate too much too early or in the wrong order and what we can do to recover afterwards?

Best regards,

Lawliet”

Both are very good questions and as they are both more or less related I decided to answer them in detail in this post.

If you ever watch good verbal movie seductions – like, say, one featuring Sean Connery or George Clooney – you’ll notice there’s often a moment when the male suddenly cuts all the cute stuff, leans in, and says something that locks the tension in and dials it up through the roof.

This is usually the moment of the seduction when you smile to yourself and say, “Wow, he’s good.”

Sometimes when one of these men do this, the woman in question is going off on a tangent, or rambling, or even panicking.

And then he just hushes her up, leans in, drops a little word bomb on her, and the tension goes through the roof.

If they’re somewhere private, they may start kissing... then disrobing. If they’re in public, the tension might be thick enough to chop with a meat cleaver (and the man will follow it up either by lightening the mood a bit to avoid cresting emotions too high and causing the spell to break... or by pulling her somewhere private, if it’s an option).

For the sake of discussing this technique more easily, I’m going to call the phrases the male uses ‘tension locks’; there are four (4) of them, they can be really effective, and best of all, you needn’t be a movie star or a master seducer to use them.

You just need to know what they are, and when to put them into play.

Now that we have thoroughly explored the Temple of Debauchery, we can clearly understand some of the why’s and how’s of these darkly beautiful acts.

But as a reminder, here are the first four articles of the series:

1. How to Be a Freak in Bed, Pt. 1: All Women are Freaks
2. How to Be a Freak in Bed, Pt. 2: Beginners Guide
3. How to Be a Freak in Bed, Pt. 3: A Little More Kinky
4. How to Be a Freak in Bed, Pt. 4: Shagging Like a Pornstar

At the end of the most recent article, I suggested that while sexual creativity is infinite, there are some limits to what you should do with women. But first, some of you might be asking a very reasonable question:

“Will every girl do ‘X’?”

If the man (or men) is sexy enough and if non-judgment and discretion are assured, then, yes, girls will do just about everything.

Why?

One of the big mysteries for a lot of guys who are new to pickup is just how, exactly, men who are ‘naturals’ with women meet enough women to have the partner volume they do.

If you’ve ever had a talented natural friend, you’ll notice it seems like he never does a cold approach, and spends most of his time just hanging around and socializing, and yet, somehow, unless you’re doing huge volumes of cold approaches yourself, he just runs laps around you lay-count-wise.

You stop by to grab him for lunch and he’s walking yet another girl out of his place, hair disheveled and a wistful look in her eye.

Where do guys who are genuine naturals with women meet all the girls they sleep with?

Welcome back to the freaky deaky parade, my friends. Here’s the rundown:

• In our first article, we discussed how all women are freaks, and why they therefore also love kinky men.

• In the second article, we covered some introductory techniques, like dirty talk and spanking.

• And in the third article, we stepped up our game a bit with some bondage, choking, and other more risqué techniques.

Now? Well, I’ve been quite graphic with this series, but this article will blow the rest away.

But before I get into the slimy details, let’s recap why you should do these things with women, even if you’re not that kinky yourself.