Journeyman have been at it a while and have begun to develop major good habits and success streaks as practitioners of the social arts
A
reader named Tom wrote in a short while back with the following
question:
“Can you do an article of what a man should do when he has to compete with a badboy to attract a woman?
Many thanks for reading.”
Well, that’s an interesting one.
Especially considering so much of the content on Girls Chase is aimed at turning you into the bad boy.
But what happens when you’re head-to-head with a badder boy than you?
Howdy all,
Today I decided to take the time to answer a question related to escalation (being physical or verbal), and more in particular about calibration – calibrating escalation to the girl and the situation.
In other words, the readers were curious how one can escalate while limiting their chances of facing resistance.
Many students of seduction struggle when it comes to escalation, because they lack calibration and can easily blow things off if they do things wrong. Now, being perfectly calibrated is impossible, but great calibration skills come from experience.
However, in this post I will give you some tools that will make things easier for you.
Now onto the questions:
A reader who posted as Anonymous asked the following:
“I was thinking, what’s the difference between sleazy guy who talks about sex, using sexual frames, and escalating vs. sexy guy who talks about sex, using sexual frames and escalating.
And I read your sequence in “Physical escalation in Public” What happens when we escalate at the wrong sequence (too much)? thanks alek ;)”
In addition, Lawliet asked this:
“Nice article bro!
Anonymous said something interesting. Got me thinking.
Just wondering what happens when we escalate too much too early or in the wrong order and what we can do to recover afterwards?
Best regards,
Lawliet”
Both are very good questions and as they are both more or less related I decided to answer them in detail in this post.
If you ever watch good verbal movie seductions – like, say, one featuring Sean Connery or George Clooney – you’ll notice there’s often a moment when the male suddenly cuts all the cute stuff, leans in, and says something that locks the tension in and dials it up through the roof.
This is usually the moment of the seduction when you smile to yourself and say, “Wow, he’s good.”
Sometimes when one of these men do this, the woman in question is going off on a tangent, or rambling, or even panicking.
And then he just hushes her up, leans in, drops a little word bomb on her, and the tension goes through the roof.
If they’re somewhere private, they may start kissing... then disrobing. If they’re in public, the tension might be thick enough to chop with a meat cleaver (and the man will follow it up either by lightening the mood a bit to avoid cresting emotions too high and causing the spell to break... or by pulling her somewhere private, if it’s an option).
For the sake of discussing this technique more easily, I’m going to call the phrases the male uses ‘tension locks’; there are four (4) of them, they can be really effective, and best of all, you needn’t be a movie star or a master seducer to use them.
You just need to know what they are, and when to put them into play.
Now that we have thoroughly explored the Temple of Debauchery, we can clearly understand some of the why’s and how’s of these darkly beautiful acts.
But as a reminder, here are the first four articles of the series:
At the end of the most recent article, I suggested that while sexual creativity is infinite, there are some limits to what you should do with women. But first, some of you might be asking a very reasonable question:
“Will every girl do ‘X’?”
If the man (or men) is sexy enough and if non-judgment and discretion are assured, then, yes, girls will do just about everything.
Why?
One of the big mysteries for a lot of guys who are new to pickup is just how, exactly, men who are ‘naturals’ with women meet enough women to have the partner volume they do.
If you’ve ever had a talented natural friend, you’ll notice it seems like he never does a cold approach, and spends most of his time just hanging around and socializing, and yet, somehow, unless you’re doing huge volumes of cold approaches yourself, he just runs laps around you lay-count-wise.
You stop by to grab him for lunch and he’s walking yet another girl out of his place, hair disheveled and a wistful look in her eye.
Where do guys who are genuine naturals with women meet all the girls they sleep with?
Welcome back to the freaky deaky parade, my friends. Here’s the rundown:
In our first article, we discussed how all women are freaks, and why they therefore also love kinky men.
In the second article, we covered some introductory techniques, like dirty talk and spanking.
And in the third article, we stepped up our game a bit with some bondage, choking, and other more risqué techniques.
Now? Well, I’ve been quite graphic with this series, but this article will blow the rest away.
But before I get into the slimy details, let’s recap why you should do these things with women, even if you’re not that kinky yourself.
Welcome back,
In the first article of this series we learned that all women are dirty little freaks.
In the second article we covered some ways you can spice up your sex life.
Now, we’re going to get even kinkier.
If you’re reading this, then you’re down to get weird with me.
Before we begin, let’s review what we know so far (see Part 1): all women are nasty little vixens deep down inside, even if they maintain a pure appearance (women are too complex for the binary thinking of the Madonna/Whore complex).
In this article, I’ll explain in excruciating detail how to get your lovers boasting about their sex with you to all of their friends.
It would only be fitting, then, if we start with precedent. And really, you want to...
“Any good dreams last night?”
“How was your day today?”
“You’ll never believe what happened to me.”
There are normal little communication bits and pieces you’ll encounter in relationships. They seem pretty small and trivial, and superficially they are.
However, these little questions or statements – called ‘bids for connection’ by Professor Emeritus John M. Gottman, Ph.D. – have big impacts on relationship health.
That’s because any time you make a bid for connection, or a gal you’re with makes one toward you, it goes one of two ways:
How often these little bids are turned toward or away from makes a world of difference, it turns out.
Many
years back, I had dinner with a girl I’d recently just slept
with. We were both young and inexperienced; our date had been fun, but
the sex mediocre.
On this second date, we had a nice time, and chatted. I didn’t have much more time in town, and would be leaving soon. At the end of the meal, I invited her home.
At first she accepted, but then she stopped, mid-walk: “Wait, you’re leaving, right? You know what, I think I’m just going to go home.”
I didn’t fight it. I said okay and let her go. I’d be lying to say I wasn’t disappointed.
If you’ve been hooking up a while, you’ve no doubt experienced this too:
Sometimes she’s happy to sleep with you again and again once
first sex occurs
Other times, you sleep with her once, and that’s it
... and there isn’t always rhyme or reason to it either.
A girl you had a great date and phenomenal sex with may not call you back, and a girl you bumbled your way into the bedroom with and prematurely ejaculated in front of may fall all over herself to meet you again.
So what gives?
What’s it take to convert a girl you’ve slept with once into one you sleep with again and again?
