(2) Intermediate

Arousal excites a girl with desire for you. Similarity fills her with trust in you. Yet most men focus more on one than the other… so, what happens when you do?

In romance, many men focus more on arousal, while many others focus more on similarity.

Arousal guys do a range of things to excite the women they talk to, such as:

• Touch them
• Flirt with them
• Move them around
• Look & act sexy
• Behave like bad boys
• Challenge them
• Turn things sexual
• Create scarcity
• Display preselection

Similarity guys do a range of things to make women trust them more, like:

• Establish rapport with them
• Get to know them very well
• Build deep rapport (deep diving)
• Look for commonalities with them
• Create isolation with them
• Foster an 'us vs. the world' feeling
• Look & act like a warm, genuine man
• Avoid being overly pushy or aggressive
• Qualify women on what they like about them

Both sides of a courtship are powerful, attractive, and necessary.

However, many men favor one area much more than the other, leading to what we might call 'lopsided seductions'.

I'll explain.

Hook girls in with these simple, effective tactics. A focus on what works to get girls hooking into their conversations with you, chatting and engaged.

Hey guys and welcome back. Last time I shared my opening cheat-sheet, where I gave you what I consider the most essential fundamentals in opening.

Today I will give you a similar cheat-sheet for hooking – basically the phase that takes place right after opening: the follow-up to your opener.

Because the purpose behind opening is to… open. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Yet that’s just a starting phase. A necessary one, sure, but that’s all it is.

The idea with a hook-phase is to get settled – to become one with the group you just opened. Go from being “that stranger” into becoming someone they know and enjoy. The hook phase is about getting them to want to keep talking to you – immerse them into you and your conversation.

If you lack a solid hook, the interaction will be on life-support while you struggle to get there, and will die off if you can’t. A solid hook lets you feel settled and gives you playing room to start the seduction process, setting frames and escalating the vibe.

You must be able to hook if you want to seduce.

What’re the odds you pick up a given sort of girl in a given sort of place? Well, it depends on a few different factors that affect that probability.

We had a conversation over on the forum where a forum member was asking where to find beautiful girls who aren't club goers, social media validation junkies, or nymphomaniacs. He reports that all the hottest girls he's been with came via dating apps, and all these girls were hot-but-broken. He's struggled to meet equally hot girls in-the-flesh via cold approach.

I replied with my thoughts, which included me stating that you are much more likely to find women with high partner counts and personality disorders in nightclubs and in any kind of show-off-y place (like with a prominent social media following) than you are elsewhere.

So, if he wanted to avoid those sorts of women, he'd be better off looking places other than in nightclubs and on dating apps or social media.

This triggered another member to jump on the thread and argue with me that the women you meet in nightclubs, the women you meet on dating apps, and the women you meet via daytime approaching (he even threw in "the women you meet in church") are all exactly one and the same, and any kind of differentiating between such girls is your imagination.

However, I soon realized we were talking about different things:

• He was talking about possibility, saying things like "You can meet a girl who's a virgin in a nightclub"

• I was talking about probability, saying things like "You are far less likely to meet a girl who's a virgin in a nightclub than in a campus library"

In seduction, the distinction between possibility and probability is a key one to make, as it influences so much of what you do, where you go to do it, and how exactly you go about it.

People ‘cuff’ mates into short-term relationships during cuffing season. Why do they do it – and who does it more, men or women? Our survey tells the tale…

As we enter October, 'cuffing season' begins.

Cuffing season is the time of year people enter into seasonal (winter) romances. The season occurs from October through March. Cuffing season romances are short; only long enough to last the holidays. During cuffing season, people seek partners more relationship-worthy than those they usually date. The majority of these relationships however end before summer.

We gathered these and other insights from a survey we ran to American adults. We also discovered a few other surprising facts about the phenomenon of cuffing a partner down when the temperatures dip low.

Is your opening in a rut (or you aren’t opening many girls at all right now)? Try one of these exercises to get yourself opening again, and “freshen up” your approaching.

Every guy could be a little better at opening girls.

Further, anytime you've stumbled across a new opener, you've probably gone on a bit of tear, haven't you?

How do you approach a girl whose head is big over all the compliments she’s been fending off? By disqualifying her looks… and getting her to tell you what else she has going on instead.

Today we're going to talk about an old Mystery technique from back in the day.

Perhaps we should call it "Throwbacks Tuesdays" instead of "Tactics Tuesdays"!

The technique in question is the looks-disqualifying screen. You use it on hot girls who know they're hot in situations where men fawn over their looks. The point: remove a woman's sense of looks-based self-importance and cause her to qualify herself to you on qualities of hers not so readily on display.

The standard line for this is, "You're cute, but what else you do you have going on for you?" said in a way as if you're a bit bored with the fact that she "is cute" and are half-interested to know if there's anything more to her than appearance.

This tactic is deadly in certain situations. It's very well optimized for scenarios where women have big heads (and thus, high walls) due to confidence in their appearances.

That said, in other situations, it's unnecessary, and possibly tone-deaf, so let's look at when to use it before we dive into the details on how to apply it.

Without a map you’ll almost never reach an unfamiliar destination. If you want to succeed with women, you need a little navigation to get there.

What's your aim with women? Have you thought about it?

When you go out to talk to girls, are you just going out randomly or is there a purpose?

Do you go out to try some techniques, and maybe they work or maybe they don't, then you go out another day and try again?

Men who are successful improving rapidly with women walk a fine line between having clear intentions while remaining outcome independent. Most guys err too far on one side of the other of this.

You get guys who have clear intentions... but they get really attached to outcomes. Every outing is an emotional roller coaster ride as they deal with things going or not going their way (often for reasons outside their control).

Then you get guys who are outcome independent... but who have fuzzy intentions. They go out, talk to girls, don't take it personal when it doesn't go their way, but sort of hang about listlessly experimenting with this or that in an undirected way.

Mapping out your desired end goals with women and thinking it through clearly can be a big help to actually getting where you want to get go with girls.

Of course, you must build your map in the most useful way.