Women tell you they’re “done with hookups” all the time. But when
they say it, do they really mean it?
A few years back, I rode down the elevator from a business
conference around 8 o’clock at night. There was a woman in the elevator
car with me as I rode down, and I struck up a conversation with her.
She was 39; six years my senior at the time. She was married
with children, but thin and shapely, and looked good for her age.
In the lobby, she revealed she was leaving the conference. I was on
my way out too, and I noticed her linger a bit after she told me. She
seemed like she was waiting to see what I’d say. So I told her “Me too.
I’ll walk with you,” and we left together.
She was hungry; she hadn’t eaten dinner. We headed to a diner
nearby. There, she ordered food and a drink. I didn’t want to eat and
only ordered a drink. And she told me about her life. The vibe
grew ever more intimate, and ever more charged.
We got the bill; she paid for everything. Then, as we got up to leave,
she said she thought she would just head back to her nearby hotel and
rest. She gestured in the direction of her hotel and told me it was
So, I called it off. I bid her goodnight, and walked a different
way. I’d gone along with her because I don’t spend time with women in
their late 30s, or women who are married with
children, and I was curious how far things would progress. I never had
any intention to sleep
with her though. Just to have a nice conversation.
As things progressed, and the vibe got sexier, I did
get a bit tempted... everything just flowed so well. I try not to
break my “no girls over 30” rule, though I thought about it here since
the girl looked fine and everything flowed so smooth (I’ll set the rule
for genuinely beautiful post-30s women who don’t look like they’re
post-30s... or for attractive-enough women in their 30s who make
it sufficiently easy and enticing). However, I also have a rule about
not hooking up with married women I know are married, especially if I
know they have children, and that is one I don’t break. So I let her
go... yet it stood out to me, for one reason:
I thought women her age were
supposed to be ‘done with hooking up’ and too mature for all this
hookup stuff, I thought.