Female Mind | Girls Chase

Female Mind

A look into the way women see love, life, lust, and relationships.

9 Things Women Want from the Men Around Them

Hector Castillo's picture

What Women Like in Men
What do women want in men? The “what” is relatively simple; but in a romantic context, it’s also about what you should and shouldn’t give them as a man.

What do women want? More specifically, what do women want from men?

Most of the time when these questions are asked, you get some derivative of “Who the hell knows?” and everyone laughs.

But we’ve figured it out and have it all cataloged here at Girls Chase. We have a pretty darn good idea of what women want from a romantic partner.

We know what women want in the short-term and the long-term.

And we teach you how to become a man who can supply it all.

I’ll go over what women want in this article, but just because a woman wants something doesn’t mean you should give it to her. That shouldn’t sound too revolutionary. If you were to give everyone what they want all the time, your resources and time would drain in an instant.

You should only give women what they want so long as it aligns with your personal values and if it helps you achieve your goals.This might sound like a business framework applied to romance, and it very much is.

But while one should be kind and generous, there are limits to how much you should give if you are romantically interested in a woman. And that’s the departure-point premise of this article.

So, with that said, I'll tackle the subject from the perspective of what women want in a romantic partner, long or short term. I'll also discuss what you should and shouldn't give her, and under what circumstances.

Do Women Lack Agency?

Chase Amante's picture

agency [ey-juhn-see]

noun, plural a·gen·cies.

the ability to make your own choices and act independently, free from the influence or pressure of others.

women have agencyThe subject of women's agency is one both feminist circles and the manosphere have debated almost since each movement's inceptions. Although these two movements approach things from different perspectives, and arrive at their conclusions via opposite routes, they both reach the same conclusion: that no, women do not have agency.

From the feminist side of things, here's a "veteran advocate, activist and educator" who pushes for "genuine sexual liberation and self-acceptance for women" (bio) who declares most women have no sexual agency. And here's the World Bank, a global financial institute and progressive spearhead organization (which has "promote gender equality" as one of its signature 'development goals'; it's also focused on, for instance, fighting manmade global warming), claiming that "girls and boys, and later women and men, have unequal capacity to exercise agency."

The consensus among feminists and other progressives is that women are deficient in agency. The reason they're deficient, feminists and progressives tell us, is because oppressive patriarchal systems and brutish, insensitive men sideline women from decision making -- even within their own lives.

The manosphere side arrives at the same conclusion as progressives and feminists -- that women are lacking in agency -- yet deduce this from a different set of clues. In the manosphere, examples of depraved, seemingly immoral behavior by women and the reliance of much of the modern female lifestyle on contraceptives, as well as the dearth of women who aspire to "higher values" as opposed to men, are pointed to when making the case that "[a] woman’s lack of agency is something neither to celebrate, nor despise. It is something to accept."

The consensus among red pill and manosphere thinkers, just like feminists and progressives, is that women are deficient in agency. The reason they're deficient, red pill and manosphere thinkers tell us, is because they are simply biologically incapable of freeing their decision-making from emotions, from accepting blame for mistakes they've made, or from hewing to any ideals higher than the most base, primitive necessary to run a life in a society.

It would seem that, while feminist, progressive, red pill, and manosphere thinkers might argue about the source, they all agree on the outcome: women lack agency.

So it might appear the debate is settled. Now we're just arguing about who's to blame: Mother Nature, or outdated, patriarchal men.

But I have another perspective on female agency.

Because I've seen all the things these thinkers talk about. I've also seen a lot of other things. And I've spent a lot of time up close with women, digging deep into their thinking and behavior beyond what they are even typically consciously aware of themselves doing, and beyond what most outside analysts believe they are doing too.

It's led me to the conclusion that women do not lack agency at all. Not in the feminist way, and not in the manosphere way, at least.

Instead, women beguile -- something they're exceptionally good at -- as part of how they act with agency in the world.

A woman uses the cloak of lack of agency as part of her real agency. Feminists further the agenda because it furthers theirs; male progressives and manosphere men alike push this female agenda (coming at it from different start points) because they buy it and believe the performance.

But a performance is what it is.

How Women Test Men in the Face of Sexual Desire

Varoon Rajah's picture

tests in the face of sexual desire
If you show sexual desire toward a girl you just met, she’ll throw tests your way. If you pass with flying colors, she might get excited to have sex with you.

In my last article, we covered why it’s important to show aggressive desire to women. Too few men are doing this properly, so now you can – and should – be one of the exceptions.

What I’ve observed is that overall, guys have regressed socially. A friend and I went to a New Year’s Eve party in San Diego, and we didn’t see any men approach women in a 1,000+ person party… until around 1:00 am when every single guy was needily – and horribly – approaching every single woman they could. They got rejected after 5 minutes or less every time. This happened over and over throughout the venue.

By 1:30 am the walls put up by every single woman in that venue were sky high – even a good approach wouldn’t be entertained, unless value had been built earlier in the night when the opportunity was there. So, it’s always better to be the exception to the rule.

However, being the exception also means women will test for authenticity harder, faster, and stronger.

“I've seen it all.”

Have you ever heard this from women? I have – it’s funny when they say this because they already know all the typical emotions of a guy if they’ve had enough experience (and if they’ve been screwed over by men enough times). Despite this, you can still entertain women with your antics as long as you rebuff their tests, stay, and maintain a fun and sexy frame.

“I know exactly what you guys want.”

This is another classic test. Last time I heard it, I looked at her straight in the eye with a boyish grin and smiled as though I was enjoying myself, which I was. After a short silence, I said, “So what? Have you also seen when guys do this?” And I lightly grabbed and squeezed her ass, in a way that no one else around us could see.

“Stop!”

She pulled away a little bit, laughed and smiled at me playfully while she said it – clearly she was annoyed, but she was having fun, too. I smiled and went right back to talking about something else. We cooled off for a little while, but she came right back and locked hands with me after that. That was a first date, and we had great sex that night.

Since I recognized her tests and signals, and passed with flying colors, I knew I'd be going home with this girl, and it was fine to do it. I wouldn't recommend it if you're not absolutely sure that a girl sexually desires you. For my style, it was great – playful, fun, sexual banter. She said something that I recognized that she was testing me on, and my response was to be aggressively playful and show some sexual desire – which probably turned her on. She pulled away because we were in public – she wouldn't want our antics to be seen by anyone around her.

When you're trying to go for sex with a woman, she's going to test you. It's in her nature to do that. The real reason that women test men is that they're used to seeing all sorts of tricks by men – and no girl wants to feel like a guy is just trying to get his rocks off inside her like she’s some random girl. No girl wants to feel like she's being masturbated into. Even if it's for one night, she still wants sex to be passionate and mind-blowing – she needs the man to give her his full attention, not just to treat her like a sex doll.

What a girl tests for is how strong a man’s desire for her really is.

Women Are Attracted to Men Who Show Sexual Desire

Varoon Rajah's picture

women are attracted to sexual desire
It’s a misconception that women are not attracted to aggressive men. The truth: women go nuts for aggressive men who show their sexual desire in the right way.

Have you ever noticed how well some guys do with women? If you’re a nice guy, you might see these dudes and wonder what makes them so special, and why women like them so much. Maybe you’ve seen them at nightclubs with a stunner in heels, or maybe you’ve seen your natural friend pull girls over and over again.

The chances are that – even though I’m not talking about one specific man – you can still picture the kind of dominant, masculine, and ultimately aggressive guy that I’m talking about.

A key reason these guys get women is because they show their desire. At a very basic level, any guy who wants a girl must show his desire towards her. A girl may throw indicators of interest and other signals towards a guy, but if he doesn’t show his desire, girls often move on.

There’s another key facet here that separates the average guy from the guy who actually succeeds often. Naturals, players, and men who know how the game works understand that it is actually their aggressiveness that distinguishes them from most men. That aggressiveness – their willingness to take risks with women and go after what they want – draws women into their world.

Aggressive guys get girls more often. If you’re gaming and you want women, you must show the women around you aggressive desire, and go after them aggressively.

Are Women Intimidated by You? You Might Be Surprised

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

intimidate women
Men often think women don't like them for something unrelated. When in fact 'she's intimidated by you' is often the true cause of women's reserve.

Do you intimidate women?

Might you intimidate women even if you think you don't?

For years, a professionally successful friend of mine has struggled with women. He's a tall guy with a healthy bank account, a good head on his shoulders, and a rugged ex-Marine Corps background. On top of all that, he's studied game under many of the more notable seduction gurus that have come and gone.

This friend does direct day game, and everyone who's gone out with him tells me his game is very solid. It's no problem for him to attract attractive (and often much younger) women. He has little difficulty to get them out onto dates either. Many of them come home to his place after, and often he's able to kiss them and begin the escalation.

But there his efforts stop. Because almost every single woman he ends up this far with (and he gets this far with lots of girls) puts the brakes on hard and leaves. He can go almost a year without sleeping with a new girl sometimes, despite bringing girl after girl to his place and getting to the kiss.

He's tried taking it slow and stretching things out across multiple dates. He's tried going for it in one date. He tried an exercise I gave him, where his mission was to invite one girl home each day for 30 days, including women he'd just met on the street. It surprised him how easy it was to get girls back to his place -- yet none of these girls he pulled home slept with him.

He's tried technique after technique, method after method. He's tried abandoning seduction techniques and focusing on the gym or clothes or other physical attractive qualities. He's tried everything. He's mystified myself and a few other very experienced friends too... purely by dumb luck a guy who pulls as many women home as he does should sleep with one of them at least accidentally. But almost every single seduction of his ends the same way.

In the end though, it turned out there was one thing above all he had to fix.

Once he fixed it, he finally cleared his final hurdle to getting together with women he wanted.

That one thing was intimidate women less -- a problem he did not even realize he had.

3 Things That Get Women to Have Sex FAST

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

Get Women to Have Sex FAST
If you want to take women to bed fast, here’s how to set a sexual tone and get them horny and in the sheets – or a convenient bathroom stall – lickety split.

Many years ago, I was practicing my pickup skills in this bar in Montreal, and I ran into two guys – Tall Guy and Short Guy. They were leaning up against the wall looking cool, scanning the room, and occasionally nodding at each other. Recognizing them as fellow hunters in search of women for fast sex, I went over and said, “What’s up?”

“Oh, we’re just practicing,” Short Guy replied.

“Practicing what?” I asked.

Eye contact. Vibe. How about you?”

“I’m here to pick up chicks.”

They nodded their heads and tipped their fedoras in approval (I’m serious. This was 2007. Pickup dudes wore fedoras).

“Question?” I asked.

“Sure.”

“Have you guys approached any girls yet?”

“What? Oh no, we don’t approach. We let them approach us.”

“Really?” I said, shocked that there was some magic new technique I hadn’t heard of yet.

“Yeah, man,” Tall Guy said. “It’s way better when they approach you.”

“Sooo,” I said skeptically, “have any girls approached you yet?”

“No, man. Not yet. But they will. These things take time.”

Confused but fascinated, I stood back for a few minutes and watched their method. If this was true and there really was a “they approach you” approach, I needed to learn and master it. It would make life so much easier. It would feel like I was in Fall Out Boy.

So, I stood at the bar twiddling my thumbs for a few more minutes and quickly grew bored. I wandered out onto the small dance floor and tried high-fiving a few girls, but they ignored me. I said something to another girl, and she ignored me, too.

Being ignored has always failed to deter my seductive ambitions, so I tried again and again, not having a clue what I was saying, only hoping one of these pretty creatures would give me a shot. Eventually, after about twelve tries, one did. We started dancing, then grinding, then kissing and making out. As I left the bar with her, I looked back at the two fedora-tipping masters (who were still womanless), who gave me a wave and a thumbs-up.

12 Limiting Beliefs Men Have About Women

Chase Amante's picture

limiting beliefs
If you have one of these beliefs about women, it's holding you back... and you probably don't even realize it.

Each man sees the world in a different way.

Some of the differences between how one man sees the world and how the next one does are slight. Other differences, though, are extreme.

If a man holds the right beliefs, he unshackles himself to achieve success beyond his most fantastic hopes and dreams. If he holds beliefs that limit him though, he may stumble into great ravines on the road to wish fulfillment... or he may chain himself fast, so that he never starts on the road to fulfillment at all.

There are four types of limiting beliefs men hold:

  1. Inaccessibility ("I can't get/have what I want")

  2. Over-accessibility ("I can have that whenever I want")

  3. Transience ("Once I have it, I'm destined to lose it")

  4. Permanence ("Once I have it, or someone else does, it's forever")

Those beliefs boil down into two dimensions: one of accessibility, and the other of transience/permanence.

The most accurate belief sets abandoned these extremes. Men who succeed most stop thinking about the world in terms of the blacks and whites of beliefs like these, and view it as a vast world of gray -- a promising world of gray, with boundaries and limitations, but where most things are achievable, though not always easy.

Today we're going to talk about 12 common limiting beliefs men have about women and dating. Hang onto these beliefs, you'll make costly mistakes, or never get far with women at all. Wouldn't it be neat though, to be free of these beliefs -- and free to meet the women you want, date them how you want, and get success with them that seems out of reach to most other men?

The best way to overturn limiting beliefs is through action, because action is where you put your beliefs to the test -- and find out which hold up, and which do not. We'll talk about this below too.

We'll begin with one of the most common limiting beliefs: that girls like that are simply too hot for you.

Women Are Emotional (But Not Irrational) – The Method Behind the Madness

Hector Castillo's picture

Women Are Emotional But Not Irrational
Think women are crazy? If so, it’s probably because you’ve dated one. Fact is, beneath their seemingly emotional disarray, you’ll find a high level of rationality.

Men like to complain about how emotional and irrational women are. We even hear many of those claims in the seduction community and its neighboring communities – e.g., the Manosphere, the Red Pill community, etc.

“Women are feelz before realz.”

“Chick logic.”

Some of these guys even brand women children who are incapable of making adult decisions based on logic and reason. Here at Girls Chase, we know better.

Women are emotional, but not irrational. In fact, they are far more rational than you can imagine – when it comes to what’s important.

Put another way, women are guided by their emotions, but that doesn’t lead them to make as many stupid decisions as you might think. That’s the real accusation behind men calling women “irrational,” isn’t it? That they are less capable of making sound decisions?

Let’s be clear – there is some truth to the claim that women are less rational than men. Men are the leaders of our species, better equipped to make hard decisions like where to eat dinner or how to defeat an army. But when it comes to sexual selection, women are vastly more competent than men. That’s why 80% of women in history have reproduced, whereas for men, that figure is below 40%.

The emotion-based behavior of women leads them to be vastly more successful at sexual selection than men, which makes them highly rational, since sexual selection is one of the most important decisions – perhaps the most important – that any human can make.

Thus, I would argue that women are not irrational. They’re simply designed for different purposes than men and perform their purpose well because of their emotional nature.

How to Treat Ghosts, Flakes, and Rejections from Girls

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

ghosts flakes and rejections
Do you get WAY more rejections than dates? Well, it’s the same for even the best seducers. Here’s how treating rejection differently can help.

Violets are blue, roses are red, without many options, seduction is dead.

I’m a true poet.

How familiar is this day-game situation? You approach a girl, give her a compliment, talk for a few minutes, get her number, text a few times, ask her out, and… nothing. She just answers “lol”, changes the subject, or flitters away like a pretty ghost.

It feels like a diss, doesn’t it? After all, you had the guts to approach her. You spent months, perhaps years, learning how to do this – to overcome your shyness, your approach anxiety. To improve everything from your appearance and body language to your worldview and lifestyle!

And she doesn’t care. Not one bit. She didn’t even ask you a single question about yourself. How dare she. You spent thousands of dollars on self-help, seminars, books, and online courses. You learned to meditate, increase your income, and build world-class social skills.

And she flakes. It’s like you’ve reverted to a San Francisco street turd.

Just last week, I went to a gay pride parade and met this lovely creature. Long, black hair down to her bum. Wide, full lips. Big, expressive eyes. I reached out my hand and she placed hers in it. I pulled her in and said, “You’re something, aren’t you?”

“Yes,” she nodded, her body pressed against mine, eyes staring straight into mine. A minute of conversation, and we kissed. Approaches don’t get much better than this.

It was “you had me at hello” game.

We were going on separate paths, so I got her number. I got home, still a bit giddy from that post-flirtation high. That evening, I texted her. Nine hours later, she replied with “Haha.” The lowest investment reply possible. So, I waited eight hours and texted her again. No reply. No “Sorry I’m not interested” or “Maybe another time.” Just annoying silence.

And I still haven’t heard from her.

Do not waste yourself in rejection; do not bark against the bad but chant the beauty of the good.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

“But Tony, you’re supposed to be a Grand Master Jedi Puuaah! No girls flake on real Pooooass!”

Yeah, girls flake on me, ignore me, diss me – just like you and every guru, coach, and player I know. No matter how tight your game is, most women just won’t be interested or available. They might humor you or amuse themselves at your expense, but they won’t go home with you or ever see you again. That’s just the cold reality of the game. Sniff.

But there’s some girl out there who’s down. She’s very down. It’s your job to find her. That’s why numbers matter. The more leads you have, the better your odds.

11 Ways Women Express Interest that Most Guys Miss

Chase Amante's picture

express interest
Women use subtle ways to express their interest. Keep an eye out for these 11 signs though, and women's subtle signals become clear as day.

Women express interest in men in all sorts of subtle ways. Much of the time, you may not even pick up on the signs... or you may have a vague sense she's interested, but not be sure.

It's a common thing for a guy to think maybe a girl's interested, but actually you're not sure, so you let her go... only to realize later on that, yep, she was definitely interested -- and you missed your shot.

In the list below, we'll lay out 11 of the more subtle ways women use to express interest in you. Once armed with these, you won't have to wonder if "maybe she is." You'll know when you've spotted one of the signs -- and can proceed with her accordingly.

Let's start with #1.