(2) Intermediate

If you go out to flirt and talk with women, and you set up dates, and have sex, does that mean what you’re really after is female approval? Well, yes and no.

There is this argument that resurfaces every so often from the MGTOW/MRA/incel crowd. The argument is that by approaching women, flirting with them, asking them out, and sleeping with them, you are engaged in approval-seeking behavior. A seducer is the ultimate 'approval seeker', by this logic, because he devotes even more time to seeking out women to date and bed than an ordinary guy.

It's an interesting argument.

At its core, there is truth. There's a fair bit of approval seeking among some chunks of dating men. And in general, any public activity you engage in to any extent involves at least a little approval seeking.

Speaking to another human is always going to be a form of approval speaking: you want this other human to acknowledge (and approve of) your thoughts, perspectives, point of view. (If you don't think that's the case, then find me one person who has no reaction when his thoughts or perspectives are rejected and mocked by another individual. Such a man is very rare.)

You want to feel (in the language of today's progressives) validated (approved of) by others.

Girls crave attention and are prone to jealousy. The “hover and disqualify” technique uses those emotions to trigger the chase instinct in any girl you choose.

Hey, guys! Here’s a simple pickup technique you can add to your arsenal. At least try it out. Maybe it will be a technique that works well for you and becomes invaluable!

As far as pickup techniques go, which are the best? That’s a hard question to answer, for many reasons. A reason often disregarded is that some techniques fit certain people better than others.

What factors determine the best technique for you?

• Your personality
• Your level of experience (with pick up and seduction)
• Where you go to meet women
• What type of women you go for
• How much you enjoy the technique

The last reason is that pickup must be fun, or it will burn you out. Personally, I can't relate to every good technique and gambit, and I don’t necessarily find them all fun to use.

The only way to truly find out is to try them. Many guys go out there with a bias of “this will not work for me” or “this is not juicy/fun/cool” without having any good reasons to believe so. Usually, their biases tend to be corrected once they try out the technique. So, don’t miss out on anything; try everything!

The technique I’m about to share is both easy to understand and pull off. It does not require a weird or funky personality. This technique is universal and suitable for players of all levels. Yes, beginners may have some success with it, too.

It’s only been used in night game locations like clubs and bars. I have not tried it out in other places yet. So feel free to experiment.

But one thing's for sure: it works crazy well on dance floors!

Let’s get into it.

In my last article, I talked about putting in your practice to get good with girls.

Let's take a break from all this practice, and grinding, and gradual improvement. What if you just want to hook up with a girl... as soon as possible?

One of the things we discussed last article was going out in 'make it happen mode', and how if you know what you're doing you can actually pull this off.

On my article "I'm Doing Everything to Succeed with Women but It's Still Not Working!", Bizzy comments:

But I have a question: have you ever done an article about how to get sex the fastest way, without doing dates, online dating, chatting and all that stuff? I mean like, only cold approach a woman and then having sex immediately?! I used to do this in my early 20s and was actually successful a few times, but now I am older and don't feel like approaching 100 women to get a few lays. I want to approach just a few women that I think I have a shot with and then close the deal. I am just lazy now, I am sick of dating, talking, pretending and all that. Women notice me, they smile and look at me but I really don't like to take them out on dates, I just would like to take them home and have fun, like when I see a hot girl in a store.

This is sort of one of the Holy Grails of seduction, and it's not usually something you will consistently pull off. So just be aware of that going in.

However, it is indeed something you can do.

Today, we're going to talk about it.

If you have a little trouble approaching (or sticking with it after the first few approaches), just switch yourself over to “pickup practice mode.”

There are three different 'going out modes' a guy can be in when he might meet girls:

1. Just hanging out mode
2. Make something happen mode
3. Pickup practice mode

One of the major differentiators between different skill levels of seducer is what mode the guy gets 'hung up' in. Because to do truly well with women you want to be able to use all three.

You might think men and women approach mating in similar ways. And on some aspects they do. On others, they're very different.

We live in a world where we're constantly told men and women are interchangeable and that men's wants are women's wants and women's wants are men's. In some cases for some things this is true... but in many cases and for many things it isn't.

The trouble this error-filled belief system can lead to is multi-layered. If you have a girlfriend, a female friend, a friend-with-benefits, or wife you think is "just like you" whom you think thinks about things "just like I do" and whom you believe wants "all the same things I do", you'll be a lot more open to and uncritical toward her suggestions. That's fine for things where there is no conflict of interest between your and her life and mating motivations.

Where there is conflict, however, her positions may quickly mislead you... without you, if you hold this "men and women are basically the same and largely interchangeable" philosophy, even fully realizing you've allowed yourself to be misled.

It's crucial for your power and sanity as a man to realize that while a good woman's advice can often be prudent, it isn't always... and that there are differences between male and female motivations, and you must always keep these in mind.

You need to know when sex differences enter into play. And you need to be wary of when the counsel you receive may be biased against what is truly in your interests due to competing sexual interests.

I deal with bipolar episodes. One minute I’m on top of the world and have more confidence, testosterone, and optimism than ANYONE... then the next minute, I’m devising a thousand different ways I could off myself and rationalizing why I’m the greatest piece of shit that has ever existed.

And my depressive episodes DEFINITELY impact my dating life. Of course they do.

But you can still find success. Hell, you can even USE your depression to your advantage.

This video is for those who aren’t feeling okay, those who rarely feel okay, and anyone who will ever at some point NOT feel okay... which is everyone.

So here’s how to navigate the dating world when you’re not feeling your best.

One of the things that dawns on you after years of cold approaching is that some women are much easier to date and bed than other women are. Further, it dawns on you that the factors that make a woman easier to date and bed are not always ones obvious to guys who don't approach a lot of women.

You learn counterintuitive truths like that very beautiful women are nicer and friendlier to strangers than mediocre-looking women are. Or that the most physically attractive women usually try to blend in more, while the most eye-catching women tend to be lower down on the looks scale but are far more deliberately flashy. You learn it's usually better to move faster than it is to wait around until some girl is 'ready' to date you (which, if it doesn't happen fast, most likely won't ever happen). You discover women have more respect for men who challenge them and ask them for favors than they do for men who go out of their ways to do favors for them.

You learn to look for signs a woman wants you to approach, as well as for signs you should stay away from her. You learn to tell how a girl shows interest in you and which women want you for sex.

Another thing you figure out, sooner or later, is how important the size of a woman's dating pool is to the odds you date or sleep with her.