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Welcome back to Dating Mechanics on Girls Chase! Today we feature a show in development for quite some time with my first female guest – Shari James – who runs a successful coaching practice based out of Los Angeles, CA called Architecture of Pleasure to help men resolve Erectile Dysfunction.

Erectile dysfunction is an epidemic among men. More and more guys suffer from it in the worst moments, and guys are trying things like Viagra and Cialis to get hard when they shouldn’t have to. I’ve heard of tons of guys who complain about ED, often at some of the worst times – like right before they’re about to have sex with a new girl.

In my own experience, having gone through this often during one period of my life (in my case, it was caused by deep emotional stress), one of the worst feelings in the world is to not be able to perform for a girl who just got into your bed excited to have sex with you. Oftentimes girls will re-rationalize that a guy actually isn’t that into them because he can’t get hard, and I often got instantly rejected after I had a girl in my bed, got ED, and it just kept on happening.

As we’ll soon see from Shari, ED is more common among guys than you think, and the sources of ED are many, ranging from excessive porn usage, to emotional and mental issues, to circulatory and nervous system functions, and also how guys control and release their sexual energy. I hope you guys enjoy this one, as it’s a common issue that few are open to talking about – especially with a woman!

Lots of guys are horrified to go out alone when learning pickup/seduction. But once you get over your fear – and you will – you’ll see it’s the best way to get good.

I remember the first time I went to a club alone.

It was Montreal, circa 2007. I’d been into PUA stuff for about a year, taking little to no action other than reading blogs and watching YouTube videos, but I’d moved to Montreal for the sole purpose of mastering my game. I was determined and focused on fixing my sex life.

The only problem was, I didn’t have any friends or wingmen to help me. My normie social circle thought it was a weird and pointless hobby, so I said “Screw it!” and went out alone.

That night, I went to a hipster club in the Plateau. It was packed with pretty college girls, drinking, laughing, and dancing with their friends. I stood there and felt all eyes on me.

My internal dialogue chirped away.

“They’re all looking at you. They know you’re alone. Why are you here? You should talk to someone. But what would you say? Isn’t it creepy to talk to strange women? Maybe go home and try again tomorrow. Come back when you’re in a better state. You don’t have to do this. Go and watch another video about what to say to women.”

Blah, blah, blah. The ego never stops. It wants you to be safe and to fit in with the herd. Feeling the judgmental eyes of all these strangers, I pulled out my cell phone and pretended to talk. Yeah, I mimed talking on the phone. I even acted out a laugh. Yep, I’m not alone! I’m just waiting for friends! Ho, ho, ho… so much fun!

Eventually, I just gave up, walked out of the club, got on my bicycle, and pedaled my pathetic ass home. That night, I made a vow – never again would I go out and at least not try. The next night, I went out and felt those same pangs of terror, adrenaline, and self-conscious doubt. But I remembered my vow. All I had to do was try… so I did.

Who doesn’t fantasize about romance when they travel? For all you adventurers, here’s how to combine sex and travel to enhance all aspects of your time abroad.

Every year, I head to Bermuda with my buddies and spend about a week there. It’s quite an amazing place. With stunning beaches and some of the most beautiful women in the world, it is truly the island of hospitality... and it really opened my eyes as to why travel and romance go hand in hand.

The first year I visited, I met a spectacular girl. I spent a day or two getting to know her and, after a long day of hiking and exploring – and an even longer night of drinking rum – we spent some time exchanging stories, dreams, and kisses before finally boarding her ship.

I’m not a fan of sex on the beach, so we went back to where I was staying. Throughout the summer and into the next year, we would consistently text about the good times we had (and were going to have) together.

She had a boat and a place by the water. She knew everyone in town and took me to the most spectacular cliff-diving areas. We went to private beach parties, and I made sure she had a great time with me from the moment I met her until I headed home. After I left, I stayed in touch with her.

The next year, we came back to visit. I’d cut my expenses by half, I’d made tons of friends, and the locals welcomed me back like I was one of them. Now, any time I get the traveling bug, I have this amazing option I know will turn out great.

By collecting international lovers, you broaden your travel plans, and those plans are far more exciting knowing you have a sexy someone there waiting for you.

If you’ve checked out some of the other articles here on Girls Chase about romance around the world, you’ve probably come across How to Pick Up Girls in Foreign Countries. Check it out if you’re not sure how to create romantic encounters when you travel. There are some things you should know and others you should avoid.

Want to get better with women but don’t know exactly how to go about it? Follow these steps to create a plan that makes efficient use of your time and your mind.

How should you go about planning for success when it comes to learning about women?

This is a difficult question to answer because seduction has many moving parts, but to follow up on my previous post, I will describe my process and the questions I use to forge my way through the chaos.

To plan for success in seduction – or anything you want to get better at – try asking these three questions.

• What do you need to improve?

• When do you need to improve it?

• And why?

These questions might seem simple at first glance, but we can only learn at a certain rate. Therefore, to improve at a rapid pace, you want to streamline the process by focusing on what is most important for you at a certain time, with the right purpose behind it. While these questions are simple, there is a lot more substance to them than meets the eye. So, in this article, I will go through a few things that should make answering them an easier task.

Knowing why you need to learn something requires you to understand the broad context. Knowing when to learn something requires self-awareness. And knowing what to improve requires access to technical details and common trends. The substance of these questions is in how you go about developing technical proficiency, self-awareness, and contextual understanding.

How do you become magnetic? The kind of guy who DRAWS attention to him, even when he's not currently doing anything.

He has... PRESENCE.

It feels like the air is different. The lighting.

He has a physical effect on the environment around him. How else can it be described?

Well, I can TEACH you how to become magnetic.

Watch.

When we jump the gun and learn specialized aspects of a new skill before getting a solid foundation, the skill can become imbalanced and riddled with holes.

I recently took a short hiatus from seduction to reflect upon its deeper nature.

During that time, I got into boxing, and I have been observing seduction in as much detail as I can to try to reach a new level of understanding. In doing so, I’ve realized something about getting good with women – or anything, for that matter. It relates to how and where we apply our effort and how to get the best possible results without wasting time and energy.

With boxing, I have spent the past year ensuring that every aspect of what I do inside the ring is 100% technically accurate. If I discovered a single flaw, I used drills, exercise, and good old-fashioned hard work to fix it. I lost weight, removed the rust I had accumulated, and changed my foundation as a boxer from head to toe. I worked on my footwork, guard, head movement, hand speed, jab, combinations, counters, and overall conditioning.

It was tough, but I’ve started turning heads as my technical skill has become more apparent. I am entering a new phase where technical ability is non-negotiable. I am capable of all the things that make a decent boxer. However, I realize this is not the end of the road.

To progress further, I have had to let go of ideas of what might be good enough to beat most fighters and start thinking about what is good enough to win against a specific opponent. I’ve made the shift from “good enough” to genuinely commanding my fate.

This is something that is true in seduction as well. At first, we must gain enough ability that it is no longer a case of if we can get a girl, but when. We do so by acquiring universal strengths, traits, and attributes that help us achieve that level of confidence.

After this goal is attained, we then face a tough period where we question what we want, and on the other side of that soul searching is a whole new phase of learning.

If you make a woman laugh, she’s guaranteed to sleep with you… NOT! Lolz, but seriously, you can definitely spark attraction if you know how to be funny.

A few years ago, I wrote a novel that has become a bit of a cult classic.

Most people (especially women) say they read it in one sitting and are unable to put the book down because it’s so hilarious. I also wrote a comedic, pornographic satire called Kuntar The Barbarian. I consider myself a bit of an expert at humor.

Don’t believe me? Pull my finger, bitch.

So many guys have no clue how to make a girl laugh. Are some men just born funny, or is it something you can cultivate? Both, just like any skill.

Now, before we get too far, I want to make it clear that laughter is not all you need to attract women. Humor is a solid tool in the seduction arsenal, because everyone loves to laugh. It’s definitely attractive. But if that’s all you do, you won’t be so great at sparking the kind of attraction that gets you laid. In fact, humor can sometimes work against you. The guys who seem to get laid by being hilarious are doing other things that aren’t so easy to see.

That said, humor is a super valuable social skill, and a great seduction tool if used right. So let’s learn how to be funny.