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Why Don't Women Cheat on Men Constantly?

Chase Amante's picture
woman considering cheating with menWomen like sex, and sex is freely available to women. So, why aren’t women indulging in it constantly, cheating on guys right, left, and center?

I have seen this question posed several times in the comment section over the past year:

With sex with men so readily available to women, why don’t women cheat on men constantly?

The question seems to be, “What is holding them back?”

After all, sex feels good!

It takes a while for women to really get in the swing of things. Most girls like sex when they first start having it, but haven’t learned to really have the time of their lives with it yet.

As women age, their reservations about sex drop, they get more in touch with their bodies, and they have a lover or two who trains them how to really enjoy having sex, they begin to really love it. For some girls this happens sooner than others – you’ll meet some girls who are total sex addicts in their teenage years, and others who at 30 are only just starting to understand their bodies.

But, generally speaking, by the time a girl’s around her mid-to-late 20s, assuming she hasn’t led a totally sheltered life (or an extremely strict serially monogamous one where her only two boyfriends weren’t especially remarkable in bed), she’s really learned to love having sex.

Even if she’s younger than that though, she still LIKES sex a whole lot (and MIGHT love it!) and it still feels good… not to mention that sex is extremely validating (“Wow, I CAN get this guy!”).

So why aren’t girls just out there all the time, getting run through by a new guy every night?

The 4 Reasons Girls Test Guys They Like

Alek Rolstad's picture
reasons girls test guysWhy do girls test guys? Tests can derail your courtship with a girl if you don’t respond well. Women test for 4 things; if you know what they are, you know how to pass.

Hi guys, and welcome back.

Today we will discuss handling tests. I won’t dive deep into the basics because we’ve covered that many times before.

Women will test you because they want to know if you are the real deal. It’s that simple.

If you want a refresher or more details, see:

When Women Test Men

Loving the Tests

Why Do Women Test? To Find Dominant Males

In this post, I’ll add more theoretical knowledge and provide a solid framework to help you understand tests. In upcoming posts, I’ll focus more on the practical details of handling tests.

Does the Lover Always Win the Game of Love?

Chase Amante's picture
lover in the game of loveLovers are skilled in the game of love. But do they ALWAYS win? If not… then is being the lover still really the best path to succeeding with girls?

In a recent article of mine, I mentioned scenarios where the lover may not get the girl.

Instead, she might spurn the lover, finding him unattainable despite whatever attractive qualities he may have, and instead pair up with a much safer man, better known to her and better trusted, albeit less exciting.

This triggered some confusion in a reader, who asked whether the lover didn’t always get the girl, and whether it was actually better to be the lover.

In case you’re new, a few quick definitions are in order:

  • ‘Lover’, in our parlance, refers to the sexually desirable mate choice with uncertain future prospects. The sexy, flirtatious bad boy who seems quite attractive but also seems like he’s not exactly boyfriend material being a prime example of such a man. When she’s not interested in such men, a woman won’t usually try to friend zone them (since she won’t be able to); instead, she’ll just reject them

  • ‘Provider’, in our parlance, is a man who courts her by going the ‘safe route’: he advertises his dependability, reliability, and consistency; his motto might well be “You can count on me.” He isn’t sexy, the way the dangerous, inconstant bad boy is… but for a girl in need of a safe, stable place to take shelter, he may be just the refuge she seeks. The rest of the time, however, the friend zone will tend to be his home

Anyway, the short answer to our commenter is that no, the lover does not always win the game of love. Sometimes the nice guy provider who’s hung so reliably by her side, and courted her with such ongoing dedication, finally does get the girl… leaving any lovers who may have pursued her out in the cold.

Yet, the lover angle is still the savvier angle to pursue for any man who possesses the energy to pursue it, for numerous key reasons – reasons any man who’s serious about romantic success does well to understand.

Female High Standards: Evolutionary Basis & Self-Advertisement

Chase Amante's picture
women's high standardsWomen often seem to have high standards for men. But why? Evolution suggests an answer: it benefits their DNA. Yet there’s more to it than just this…

Women’s too high standards have been a topic of discussion on this site many times over the years. We had the whole ongoing discussion about it last year, but we talked about it far before then too.

The position I have repeatedly many times is that women have high standards and have always had high standards. Arguing that ‘high female standards’ is some kind of new phenomenon is just more of the same historical ignorance you see with ‘any phenomenon X is a new phenomenon’. As King Solomon said, there is nothing new under the sun.

Watch old movies or TV shows or read old books and be amazed at how high the professed standards of the women are. Women, in all times and all places, maintain standards higher than men’s.

Every woman wants the perfect man: good-looking, wealthy, popular, and skilled.

No matter if she herself is far from perfect.

Why is this, though? Shouldn’t women be more realistic?

NEW VIDEOS: Why Girls Lie & How to Stop Them Lying

Chase Amante's picture

Lying is one of those things people get really irate about at times.

Everybody does. Guys do when girls do it. Girls get really upset about guys doing it to them, too.

This is just a human thing… telling lies… yet SOME people do it a lot more than OTHERS.

How do you know if the girl you’re talking to is as honest as they come… or if she’s a conniving little scamp?

Furthermore, why DO girls lie – and is there anything you can do to dissuade them from it?

Hot, Sane, Single Girls Under 30 Usually Haven't Had a Soul Mate Yet

Chase Amante's picture
beautiful woman walking down the streetIf she’s hot, sane, never-married, and under 30, it’s good odds she’s never experienced major heartbreak. Why’s this good? It means you can still be her first real, deep love.

On my article "How to Be the Best Guy a Girl's Ever Dated," a reader named Lobster asks:

How many do you think [out of] 10 [girls] have had an exceptional man? And how does [this rate] change [as they] age? Thinking about it, however, the strongest are born already from young people and probably almost all who have had relationships will have someone in their hearts since when they are young they have a lot of time to spend together

I initially read his comment as "what do you think about 10-out-10 girls who have had an exceptional man", before I realized he was asking what portion of women on average have had one.

In this article I'd like to talk about why women hung up on their exceptional exes -- 'alpha widows' is the term that gets used for this a lot (I like this term; it has a nice ring) -- are not really as common as you might think, and why that means the playing field is wide open for you if you are (or are willing to turn yourself into) an exceptional man.

How Women Tame Men, Pt. 2: Tameworthiness

Chase Amante's picture
tameworthinessTaming a man is a lot of work. How do women decide which men are worth the trouble? There’s two things they look at: how tamable they are… and how tameworthy.

A principle challenge for any woman in life is in taming the man she's set her sights on to tame.

While the most tameworthy men busy themselves in their principle challenges of various life pursuits, with little interest on being tamed by a woman, women must find a way to insert themselves ahead of busy men's varied objects and wrest men into tamed relationships.

This is no small task for a woman. Because of the huge amount of time and energy the taming of an untamed man demands, and the risk inherent in the process (i.e., that she may not succeed in taming him, and instead only waste time -- time she could've spent taming another man to build a life and family with; time she won't get back), nature forces women to be selective in the men they choose to attempt taming.

In this installment, the second in our series on how women tame men, we will look at how women decide which men appear 'tameworthy', as well as what can rule men out.

How Women Tame Men, Pt. 1: Approval/Disapproval

Chase Amante's picture
how women tame menAs most men spend time around women, they grow tamer. What causes this effect? The answer is: women themselves… and their leverage of disapproval and approval.

If you look out across the broad range of men, you will discover men of all stripes:

  • Big men and little men
  • Rich men and poor men
  • Attractive men and ugly men
  • Stylish men and gauche men
  • Manly men and girly men

... plus everything in between.

There is one thing you will discover that all these types of men have in common, no matter how they outwardly present:

Most of them, regardless the individual traits of their class, have been tamed by women.

The male sex is a sex particularly susceptible to taming.

A woman is never really tamed. She can be corralled, busied with tasks to accomplish, and made devoted to a man she feels she needs, but she is never tamed.

The female sex is the sex that does the taming.

The male sex is the sex that's tamed.

Yet, some men -- a rare set of men -- remain untamed in their hearts, minds, and deeds.

Why is it that some men are resistant to the taming of women, while most men, of all varieties, are so easily brought to heel?

Why Do Women Have Sex? The 10 Most Common Reasons

Chase Amante's picture
reasons women have sexWhy do women have sex – is it in hopes of a relationship or because the guy is hot? Urges, pleasure, loneliness, experimentation… women’s true sexual motivators may surprise you.

Lately I'm noticing more comments from readers who seem to conclude women have sex mainly because they're hoping for a long-term relationship.

One recent comment seemed to suggest a woman wouldn't have sex at all unless she thought it would lead to a relationship. Any sexual encounter not leading to one, this reader seemed to suggest, was a zero-sum loss on the woman's side of things.

Long-time readers here will know women have a variety of reasons for engaging in sex, and a woman angling for a relationship with a man is only one of them.

I've spooled off women's various reasons for going to bed with men numerous times on Girls Chase before.

Today, however, I figured I'd put some numbers to them.

So, I dug up a 1999 study that examined women's motives for engaging in short-term sexual encounters, including:

  • One-night stands (sex on one occasion)

  • Flings (sex more than once with the same individual)

  • Casual sexual relationships like friends with benefits

I ranked the top 10 most common reasons women say they slept with a new man, and also pulled out a few interesting bonus reasons and looked at how they compare to the top 10.

Put your seatbelt on, because we're diving into the sultry world of female desire.

Afraid to Talk to Hot Girls? Know THESE 5 Key Things

Chase Amante's picture
afraid to talk to hot girlsAre you scared to talk to hot girls? Don’t chicken out for the best-looking chicks. Use these 5 keys to chat up THE hottest girls today. After all – they’re only girls!

On a recent article of mine, a reader named Johnny writes

Hey Chase,

I noticed something in my approach with girls and even socialize.

I tend to hit on girls that are not super cute rather than going for the ones I find really good looking.

It isn't that I'm intimidated by hotter girls. I've eliminated almost all of my approach anxiety. I can chat them up, flirt with them.

But when it comes to pursuing them, I don't. And after drilling my thoughts, I realised that it's really about the fear of failure.

This is a very common sticking point guys have, especially guys who are active socializers enough to recognize their own patterns.

If you're regularly out there meeting new women, you may come to realize you're doing something like this over time: only approaching the 'cute' ones, because you are afraid to talk to hot girls.

Like our commenter, it might not even be that you are intimidated by the girl herself, but that you anticipate failure with her, and fear that failure... or don't even see a point to trying, because you KNOW (or so you think) that of course you will fail.

So you might as well stick to going for the girls you can get.

Well, it might blow your mind, but hot girls go for all KINDS of guys, including guys just like you... at least some of the time.

How're you going to find a good-looking girl who'll go out with little ol' you?

Step number one is you've got to talk to her. Because without that, you'll never get beyond a glance and a smile.

What can you do to get yourself approaching those knockouts and stunners you see, instead of letting them walk on by?

There are five (5) things you need to know that, once you know them, will make being afraid to talk to hot girls, or being afraid to fail with good-looking girls, a part of your distant past.