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Women Have Different Rules for Attractive Men

Chase Amante's picture
women rules menWomen sort regular guys into stereotyped boxes to know what to do with them. But make yourself sufficiently attractive, and these rules no longer apply to you…

For years, a war has raged in the seduction space between experienced and inexperienced seducers.

Inexperienced seducers have opined on all the reasons women are not interested in men like them.

Experienced seducers, meanwhile, have stated that women do not care at all about these things inexperienced men pin the blame for their lack of success on.

Things like looks, race, national origin, wealth, height, physique, and more get bandied about by the inexperienced as reasons women accept or reject men, yet rejected by the experienced as remotely valid at all.

Furthermore, inexperienced men will complain that women do not want to be approached, insist on men paying for dates, won't date you if you don't adopt the provider frame, and always insist on using condoms.

Experienced men will tell you women love to be approached, will often pay for dates themselves, are easiest to date for men who aren't providers, and will often be the ones suggesting you not use condoms themselves.

Why is there such a disconnect between men who aren't experienced with women and men who are?

Which of these men are living in a delusion... and which men aren't?

To answer this question, we must look at a simple truth of women's, and that truth is this:

Women have different rules for attractive men than they do other, more regular men.

8 Obnoxious Female Behaviors that Are Actually Signs of Interest

Chase Amante's picture
obnoxious signs of interestNot all women have class. Some women only have crass. If a girl’s signaling her interest to you in a rude, obnoxious way, it is still interest… whether you act on it or not.

I talked with a friend recently who mentioned being around a bunch of American girls after having been out of the country for a while. One of the girls obviously liked him. Then she started talking to other girls in ear-shot of him about all the guys she'd had sex with.

My friend found this a complete turnoff and lost all interest in the girl. He's no newbie; he's been with a lot of girls. He just does not like this kind of classless, crass behavior. Regardless, he knew this girl was most likely putting on this display to signal sexual availability to him.

I said yeah, I've had a bunch of girls who obviously liked that do that to me over the years... like you, I find it a turnoff. It is mostly American girls I've had do this to me too. Though come to think of it as I write this now I've had a few non-American girls who have done things like this also.

If you like classy girls, you are going to find the behavior above and many of the other behaviors we'll talk about below distasteful. Because what it is is, obviously, a lack of class; the girl has no more refined way to signal her receptiveness or availability to you, so goes for 'crassy' instead of 'classy'.

Yet if she's doing it in a situation where the other signs there are pointing to her being interested in you, then it is almost certainly a sign of interest.

So let's take a look at some of the various rude, crude, unclassy behaviors girls will engage in that are actually (much of the time) signs of interest / sexual availability signals.

Depending on your classiness preference, you may find these behaviors turnoffs... or they might be right up your alley.

Why Don't All Beautiful Girls Sleep Around?

Chase Amante's picture
beautiful girls sleep aroundShe’s beautiful. She can sleep with anyone she wants to. So, if she’s a beautiful girl, why WOULDN’T she sleep around with every hot guy she can get?

Commenting on my article on picking up girls with a jealousy plotline, a reader asks:

Hey Chase,

I've gotten together with a girl I met in a cafe.

That marks my first lay ever from day game!

It was not super straightforward to get her in bed but I managed.

She's beautiful, very smart, great personality, pretty good body- amazing girl.

The thing which shocks me is this:

After sleeping together, I casually asked her how many partners she's had before. I always do this and never come across as judgemental, so chicks always give me the full list, including guys who don't "really count"

So I know she's been honest with and freely opened up. She told me she had one serious boyfriend and that's it. One partner only.

I asked "What about any casual wild adventures? Some naughty action at parties or something?" She laughed and said she's not really a party kinda of person. She can drink socially but never got drunk and passed out and she despises clubs.

I guess what really confuses me is: if she's telling the truth, why on earth would a sexy girl like her not hook up? Guys check her out all the time, I'm sure they must have hit on her. It's so easy for her to have sex, yet she claims she only had one serious boyfriend.

It does not make sense to me because beautiful women can get sex on demand, so why on earth would she not use that opportunity?

It's interesting the range of expectations you see among men for what beautiful women's sex lives must look like.

There are men who expect the most beautiful women to be almost virginal. There are others who expect them to be total nymphomaniacs.

The actual truth of course is beautiful women are just like normal women.

They have the same kind of range in sexual inclinations and experience you find in the general population of girls: some with many lovers, some with few, most somewhere in the middle... with the added twist that as women get more beautiful, they trend toward fewer overall lifetime sex partners.

But... why?

Why wouldn't these girls, given the opportunity to hook up with so many hot guys, indulge?

Or, on the flip side, given the ability to not have to hook up, why wouldn't they stay virgins till marriage?

Learning to Love Women

Chase Amante's picture
learning to love womenIf you’ve been hurt by women, can you ever become a lover of women? To love women is not to ignore their flaws, but to enjoy them for their blessings.

I have always loved women.

They haven't always been perfectly kind to me. On some (fleeting) occasions, women have really been quite cruel to me. Of course, I don't think of it as "she is being so cruel to me!" because that is not how I think about things... instead I think, at worst, "Geez, here is an unpleasant person!"

I'm not a masochist; I don't stay in bad situations, and I am rather ruthless about cutting value-draining people from my life, including unpleasant or nasty women.

However, my dislike for a particular unpleasant person (or woman) does not dent my overall warmth toward womankind in general.

In this way, I suppose I'm opposite a great many men, who seem to have a general distrust of womankind, and instead busy themselves seeking out a singular "good woman" who is "not like the rest" to lash their hopes and dreams to.

Indeed, this is a human thing to do: there are just as many women distrustful of most men yet who search restlessly for that "one good man" who is "not like all the rest", just as men search for that among women.

Not every man may want to move from general distrust + "seeking the exception" to something closer to how I view women.

However, should you wish it, let me lay out a path for you to this kind of thinking.

Female Bad Behavior Is Often Defensive

Chase Amante's picture
female bad behaviorWhen girls act rude, dismissive, dramatic, or rejecting, it’s usually not because they’re nasty people. Usually it’s because they’re skittish about something.

When women reject a guy harshly, guys often think those women are stuck up.

When women initiate drama in a relationship, guys often think these women are big babies or control freaks.

But in actual fact women behaving badly aren't usually stuck up, babies, or control freaks.

Usually, rather, they feel scared, frightened, threatened, or unsafe.

If you can understand this simple psychological principle, the way you approach bad behavior from women changes radically.

Q&A with a Straight Male Escort

Guest Contributor's picture
straight male escortQ&A with a straight male escort: what kinds of women use escorts? What do they expect in an escort? What has escorting taught you about the opposite sex? And more…

In this guest post, a veteran (straight) male escort from the the UK's straight male escort service Gentlemen-4-Hire talks about his experiences over the last 10 years escorting.

  • What sort of female clientele do escorts get?

  • What are these women looking for?

  • Do things ever "go wrong"?

He answers these and other questions from our forum about what it's like to be an escort.

What an Average Girl's Dating History Looks Like

Chase Amante's picture
girl's dating historyWhat do women’s real dating histories look like? Do they hook up with tons of different guys… or are their romantic pasts, in fact, rather plain?

Today I'd like to de-mystify women's dating histories a bit for you.

There seems to be more confusion and misunderstanding between the sexes than ever before today. Which is sort of ironic, given how the Internet is, in theory anyway, a communication medium. And so many of us now spend so much of our time surfing around on it.

Often as a man you might get ignored or rejected by a girl and think she thinks she's too good for you. But very often that's not what's happening at all.

Instead, most often, it is simply that you are not her type.

As you get better at seducing women, you will better be able to break women out of their types and suck them into dating you.

However, you will still find that many of the girls you end up with dated guys before you who share some similarities with you, and date guys after they're done with you whom you share similarities with too.

Why does this happen?

Let's take a jaunt inside the female mind.

10 Lessons from Having Mistresses and Consorts

Chase Amante's picture
mistresses and consortsWhen a woman’s exclusive to you but you aren’t to her, you see sides of female behavior most men never will. Acceptance, exuberance, and societal convergence are just some of what you discover.

Over the years I've had a variety of relationships where the woman was sexually/romantically exclusive to me, but not I to her.

I learned the techniques to set up and manage relationships like this from an old instructor of mine, who'd often maintain 5-7 girlfriends at once, with 2-3 of them as serious relationships.

This was a lot more common in the early days of the seduction community. Men called them 'mLTRs' then (short for 'multiple long-term relationships'). Many of the guys running mLTRs didn't ask for (or weren't able to get) exclusivity from their girls. But some of them did.

Because pretty much all my romantic experience came post-discovering the seduction community, I dove right in, and went into setting up mLTRs from my very first relationships. I was a young dumb kid, dating women who were a lot more experienced than he was, and I figured it wouldn't work and I'd get laughed out of these girls' apartments and lives... but to my surprise, it did.

I've tended to call this setup 'one-sided monogamy' when I've mentioned it on this site. But since I'm talking about it here, I've realized this term, while descriptive, doesn't sound great, and doesn't really do the relationship justice. (while only one party is monogamous, the relationship itself is not 'one-sided')

So for this piece, we'll just call these women you have in a relationship like this 'consorts' or 'mistresses'.

8 Types of Girls You Can Meet (Daytime vs. Nightlife vs. Apps)

Chase Amante's picture
girl guideThere are many different kinds of women to meet. Most guys meet the same 1-2 types of girls again and again without realizing. But are you meeting the best one(s) for you?

I thought I'd draw up a fun article on different 'classes' of women and where they can be found. Somewhat similar to a 'monster compendium' of Dungeons & Dragons fame.

Since we're doing this day game focus (with Hector's day game course Meet Girls Everywhere about ready to launch), I was thinking about the girls you most often meet via day game vs. those you meet via night game vs. those you meet via dating apps.

I thought this'd be a neat little piece to do; one that differentiates between these different types, whom you will most often meet in different ways/venues/times/places.

Our 8 types of women are:

  1. Plain Jane
  2. Wendy Workaholic
  3. Betty Bonkers
  4. The Wild Freak
  5. Goldie Gold Digger
  6. The Chillaxer
  7. Maureen Morality
  8. Single Mom Sally

Without further ado, let's explore each...

What Is a Social Frame?

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

social frameShe has her own internal frame, and you would do well to reframe it, if it is in your interest to do so.

Hey guys, Welcome back!

Last week we looked at what a frame is and its importance in pick-up and seduction.

A frame is basically the same as a perspective - a lens through which you see and perceive the world. It stems from our own social constructions (i.e., internal frames – our sense of reality) and is deeply linked to our social identity.

Frames can be projected, becoming externalized. This happens when our internal frames are projected into the social space.

Since frames are socially constructed by default, they can also be deconstructed and reconstructed. This is key because it is the anvil upon which proper game is forged.

The interaction you have with someone has a frame – both you and the girl “convey” or “display” your own internal frames and contribute this way to the interaction. When your frames mesh, a new frame emerges.

Good pick-up skills involve being aware of your frames, her frames, and how to convey yours in a smooth way, reframing hers as negative (those that work against you at any rate) and so influence the new frame that emerges in the interaction between you and your interlocutors (for example the girl you're chatting with).