Hey guys, welcome back!
Lately, we’ve been discussing frames in-depth, in particular social and sexual frames. A frame is a lens or point of view that affects the way participants in an interaction interpret it and how they perceive you. Your contribution to the interaction will have an impact on its frame, contributing to its underlying meaning.
I went to great lengths to explain what a frame is in the post “What is a Frame?” so I won't repeat myself. For now, let’s stick to this overarching, simple definition of frames and frame control:
A frame is the perspective and underlying meaning of an interaction. It dictates and defines the characteristics of the interaction – the couple’s social standing, role, and main features.
Each action affects the narrative or underlying meaning of the interaction. They “set the tone” of the interaction. But each action also affects people’s perception of the receiver – your actions will define her perception of you.
The intermediaries between “actions” and “perceptions” are frames.
Actions –> Frames –> Perception
In my latest posts on frames, I discussed social and sexual frames. Social frames involve seduction, her internal reality regarding what she perceives as a socially acceptable or socially fit sexual mate. Your role is to set the right social frame – making her feel that you are a guy who is suitable to her on a social level (I shared numerous tools on how to achieve that).
Why is this crucial? It reduces many forms of resistance (like female state control, when she resists your moves so she doesn’t get carried away by a man who is potentially not her type socially), but it also generates compliance. It also serves as a good “security web” whenever her mood drops and her arousal fades. A bad social frame will make her regret getting carried away by your sexy escalation when that arousal fades. (“Oh crap! Why did I let myself get carried away by THAT GUY?”). According to Chase, it creates a higher floor to land back on when the effects of stimulation (escalation, etc.) fade. But it also generates a higher ceiling, as a social frame can increase her compliance level and allow you to escalate and set sexual frames with ease. So, it is a key aspect.
There are sexual frames, which put sex on the table, giving the interaction a sexual undertone, making it sexual. This is important to escalate the vibe, but it can also up her compliance levels. If sexual frames are set early enough, they help you avoid deadly pitfalls such as the friendzone and last-minute resistance (when she resists at the last minute right before you are about to have sex with her). Most importantly, sexual frames allow you to speed up the seduction and make it smoother.
So, both types of frames are essential to successful seductions.
But these frames aren’t worth much and will have a negligible impact if they aren’t coherent with what we call the “meta-frame.”