(3) Journeyman

When you set out upon the journey to truly master your skills with women, much of the time a big part of what you’re really setting out on that journey to be is a bonafide social success.

Yet, as you’ll most likely quickly find the instant you start working toward that goal, that’s usually a lot easier said that done.

Now, it is said that people are naturally social; so how is it that so many social interactions end with a feeling of awkwardness or something left to be desired?

This frustrated me for years, and it can be frustrating for any aspiring seducer or seducer-in-training. Despite what you might be told, the ability to charm or really connect with anyone doesn’t come naturally to most people. But luckily, it can be learned.

And today team, we’re looking at how to become at social dynamo.

In yesterday’s post on ways you can lose a girlfriend, we went over the 4 things that can and almost universally WILL lead to the demise of your relationship (when you’re guilty of them): being too weak, fighting too much, bad sex, and taking her for granted.

Those things happen. In fact, they happen so much, it’s my (relatively conservative, I think) estimation that they happen 90% of the time… because something close to 90% (or more) of relationships come to an end sometime before death does them part.

Because of that, breakups end up being an inevitable fact of romantic life. Unless you’re one of the vanishingly few people out there who marries his high school sweetheart without ever kissing another girl and the two of you go onto spend the next 60 or 70 years in blissful union (and if you are, hats off to you! But why are you reading this blog?), you’re going to experience a breakup at some point.

And then it’ll be time to move on.

But like I mentioned in yesterday’s post, nobody WANTS to move on.

Everybody wants to know how to get their ex back. At least, everybody searching for information on the topic, that is.

Yet I promised a post to the readers yesterday on putting the past behind them and gearing up for the future. So let’s say you’re one of those few individuals who HAS reached that point where he’s said, "You know what? It IS time to move on."

Once you’ve decided it’s what you want to do… how do you get over your ex?

So let’s say you do a great job with everything we’ve covered so far in the relationship series. You romance a girl, make her fall in love with you, weed out relationship drama, and build yourself a happy, healthy, rewarding relationship. There’s no way for you to lose a girlfriend now… right?

Well… not quite.

As it were, there are exactly FOUR ways to lose your girl, and quickly.

And you don’t have to do all of them.

You just have to do ONE of them.

Because in the case of relationships, just ONE of these is all it takes to break Humpty Dumpty to pieces and cause you to lose your girlfriend for good.

Below, I list out what exactly of these four ways are… and what the one exception is to this rule of four.

I’ve been seeing more guys than usual engaged in long distance relationships lately. And it’s not an uncommon situation to end up in in our increasingly mobile world - one or both partners leaves to attend school in a different city, or even country; she leaves or you leave to take a job somewhere else in the world.

And often these scenarios are okay - at least at first. But long distance relationships have a tendency to get complicated in a hurry.

Nevertheless, you may find yourself in a situation where you either need to choose to say goodbye, or choose to be in a long distance relationship with that one special girl. Is long distance a good idea?

Today, I want to give you a number of long distance relationship tips, an overview of when a long distance relationship is okay - and when to stay away - and take a look at the dynamics of making this choice.

Have you ever noticed how women sometimes launch into relationship drama, picking a fight for no logical reason at all… and how even their arguments themselves are completely devoid of logic? Or how women sometimes try to boss you around, just to see how much they can get away with?

And with 80% of guys, a woman can get away with a LOT… until she completely owns him and walks all over his dignity. Yet he’s grateful - hey, at least he has a real girlfriend that is not made of rubber! (Grab one of our programs, of course, and you won’t have that problem).

But why do women do this? What’s the deal with women and drama? We all know they don’t want a weak guy… so why are they undermining his strength and masculinity? And what’s the best way to deal with it?

You may have read on our blog before that women test men because they NEED to make sure their man is strong – so that’s one reason why they put his masculinity to the fire. But if you give a girl too much rope, she’ll hang you with it.

Another reason for drama, however, is one of the more insidious tricks of Mother Nature… women also need to gain a certain amount of relationship control over their men. If she’s not in charge, he might leave once she’s pregnant… she needs to be sure that she can access his resources, both for herself and for their offspring.

If she starts to hold TOO much control in the situation though, she will see that you’re not strong enough and lose all interest in you. On the other hand, if you hold too much control, you will probably lose interest in her – that’s the essence of the passion trap.

The secret is to strike the right balance… and to do that, you will sometimes have to disarm one of her tests.

Last week, I talked a good bit about love: if you should say “I love you,” and a post about understanding love; the week before we discussed how to not fall in love.

What we’re going to talk about in this post is how to make a girl fall in love with you.

I probably don’t need to spend much time laying out why this one’s something worth knowing - for obvious reasons, being able to make a girl fall in love with you is a good thing.

However, you’ll find as we discuss below that having her fall in love when you aren’t in love isn’t necessarily an ideal situation, either. Why not, you ask? Well, read on, about the four Perumutations of Love, and how exactly you go about making girls fall in love, to better understand why this is the case when it comes to that most celebrated of emotions.

As we continue on with our relationship series, there are a couple of ground rules you might set for your relationship if you want to ASSURE smooth sailing, avoid relationship jealousy, and generally have a happy and productive romance. The best way to lay these rules is, as usually, not by explicitly stating them… you don’t want to give her a list.

“These are the rules, woman.”

Not so smooth…

Instead, use the power of frame control to convey what you value and expect from a partner. For example, you can bring it up in conversation, or you can inoculate against an undesirable behavior by telling her about another girl who behaved that way… and how that did nothing to further her relationship with you.

As I said, I believe the most important rule in any functioning relationship is that both partners be always honest with each other. At the same time, however, I recommend that you trust each other implicitly until there is a reason not to. It won’t improve your relationship if you’re constantly suspicious of her… and it won’t help your relationship jealousy any. Trust is one of the four pillars of a great relationship (more about that later on in our series).

And knowing how to maintain that level of trust – and avoid relationship jealousy – is what this article is about.