(3) Journeyman

Most guys who want to get good with girls focus primarily what to say when they first start out.

Me? Pretty early on, I focused on facial expressions.

Ever wonder why girls go so crazy for certain Hollywood stars? Many of them are good-looking, sure... but there are plenty of good-looking men out there that women don't go gaga for.

Stars tend to have some preselection going on, and of course there's the money / power / prestige / social status there to back it all up. So that's part of it.

Yet, many great-looking men make it into Hollywood only to never achieve that legendary "sex symbol" status that certain actors do. What sifts the wheat from the chaff?

Well, acting chops, certainly... and hit movies help. But one of the topmost factors is this: charm.

And what's up there in the mix among the chief elements of this mysterious thing called "charm"? You guessed it - it's what we talk about in this post: facial expressions.

If you get the right sensual, powerful, captivating expressions down, you become someone positively mesmerizing to women.

So let's have a look at seven (7) of the best: four flirty and sexy to ramp up your sex appeal with women, and three for putting a little social pressure to good use... while of course still keeping it pretty sexy, too.

In "Dating Narcissistic and Egotistical Women," dehjomz asks the following about the decline of respect in a relationship:

“The problem I've faced is that I've ended up liking certain girls a great deal, but they have turned out to be selfish, cold, domineering, and narcissistic. But they were not that way in the beginning! They were quite charming and submissive and appealing to my emotions...which is why I selected them in the first place.

But unfortunately I've consistently suffered from the 1-year drop. Their charm fades, they become comfortable, and and then the real selfish, arrogant, dramatic, neurotic sides come out. I'm pretty much the same guy all the time...until faced with disrespect. In the beginning they were much more influenced by my words and my power and complied with what I wanted. But after the 1-year drop, they become more dominant, more readily resistant to my power, and instead do whatever they wanted, whenever, without any regard to my emotions. Hence arguments. I've tried everything, and no amount of logic or trying to frame things as "we're a team" works or changes the situation. They just don't care and instead they try to justify their rude behavior instead of showing empathy toward me and understanding why their rude behavior makes me mad and why I cannot tolerate it. They want to get their way, and they could give a fuck less about what they say or do to try and get under my skin. Being calm and ignoring doesn't help because I'm left wondering how this woman could have the audacity to act this way, to me of all people?”

My response was, while this can happen with narcissistic women, yes, it can also happen with any woman - even women untouched by narcissism.

This is not solely a problem with the woman. It's quite often a problem with the relationship.

That is to say, what often happens with men is a general, gradual decline of respect in that relationship, where women come to view a partner they originally saw as powerful, dominant, sexual, and strong, as possessing less and less of these qualities... and more and more of their (distinctly unappealing) opposites.

The relationship falls apart and fails because the woman has stopped respecting the man - even if he hasn't changed a bit.

In the article on sticking points, a commenter asks:

“Hey Chase, how would you go about framing the "I am the Prize" frame? Or would you think of this as more of a devoped mindset?”

"I am the prize."

Brings back memories.

The first thing I ever read about pickup or seduction back in November 2005 introduced me to the phrase. I was searching on the Internet for anything I could find to help me iron out some of the kinks I was finding with these girls I was meeting in bars and nightclubs.

Most of the advice I came across was pure nonsense. But then I found this one guy.

I read one of his articles. It was on a silly-sounding website called "Dr. Dating" or something of the sort.

But this article made sense. More than that... it gave me ideas I hadn't even thought of yet, but that intuitively fit into my model of how attraction worked.

I read another article by the same guy.

Then another.

Wow... someone who ACTUALLY knew what he was TALKING ABOUT with girls!

At the bottom of each of his articles was a link to purchase his eBook for $49.95. And after reading the third article, I was convinced - at last, I had found someone who knew things about women I did not (not yet, anyway). So, I bought the book.

And right there, in the introduction to this book that I felt confident was going to supercharge my learning process, was the message the author most wanted to convey: the mindset a man needed to succeed with women was this: I am the prize.

Quick post today. More of a reminder than anything.

Much (most?) of the time, most people trend toward black and white thinking on things. This extends to all manner of thinking:

• "This is good, this is bad."
• "This is my fault, that is his fault."
• "I am right about this and other people are wrong."
• "Other people are right about this and I am wrong."

The last two are what I want to talk about briefly today.

And I want to talk about them by way of sharing with you a Chinese parable I heard a bit back.

In the article on actor-observer bias, a reader asks:

“One thing I would like to ask is: could you by way of reply or as an article idea for the future write about how to give a girl an orgasm when she's never had them before? My girl has been with three or so guys before me and has never (not even whilst self-pleasuring) had an orgasm. She says I have gotten the closest and is astonunded at my ability in bed for a first-timer, but no one has been able to quite get her over the edge. I understand about 10% of women have this issue. Is there anything I can do to make her come for the first time?”

Since we just covered how to make a girl orgasm in general last month, I felt this one would make for a good follow up: how do you help her to orgasm if she's never climaxed before?

I've had the pleasure of having been the man who introduced a number of past lovers to their first orgasms from penetrative sex. Some of them had had orgasms in the past before from manual stimulation or from oral sex, but had never climaxed vaginally from a man's penis before.

Some had never climaxed at all.

As her lover, this is always the most satisfying way to make her climax. It's the most powerful, it's the only one that's mutual (as she's climaxing, so can you), and there's nothing that makes you feel like a man or her feel like you are one than making her writhe with sexual delight with your manhood, rather than your finger or tongue.

But how do you succeed at making a girl orgasm from sex where other men have failed?

A commenter on the article about sexy body language asks the following regarding narcissistic and egotistical women:

“I was wondering if you could put out any content on how to deal with narcissistic, overly selfish women. They're tougher to deal with on some levels and I'd love to see what kind of content you have for how to deal with that type of woman.”

If you're like many people reading this article, your first reaction might be, "Who on Earth wants to date a narcissist?"

You know... selfish, egotistical, conniving. Unempathetic. Cold, in many ways.

But there're two sides to everything, and narcissism is no exception. Narcissists also tend to be incredibly charming, very charismatic, and quite colorful. They're frequently the center of attention... the bright and shiny objects at the middle of the room.

They are the coveted. And they enjoy being coveted.

In fact, there are reasons you may want to date a girl who's a narcissist... just as there are reasons you may not.

I just had a conversation with a friend where he mentioned having a casual girlfriend of his giving him some drama and deliberately (and clearly intentionally) trying to get under his skin at the end of a normal night for the two of them.

What's a normal night look like?

• She comes over to his place

• They sit down to have some dinner

• After dinner, they get in bed and watch a movie

• After the movie, before nodding off to sleep, they have sex

In this case, my friend's girl started being resistant to sex after the movie, then asking him if he was annoyed, trying to get a rise out of him. Eventually she ended up leaving without sex occurring (normally, not something you want happening too much).

At first, I cringed... but then I realized, hey wait a minute; that's what my routine used to look like with casual and serious girlfriends alike back in the day too.

The main problem with this? It doesn't turn on your girlfriend... in fact, it's something of a turn off.

Nowadays, I structure my evenings with girlfriends very differently; and if you want women going crazy for you (instead of playing annoying drama head games with you), I suggest you make some tweaks too.