(3) Journeyman

Ever had sex with a girl you weren’t that into? Well, the phenomenon works both ways! With enough compliance, you can get laid even if she’s not attracted to you.

Hey guys, welcome back. Today, I’m going to get more theoretical to clear up a few misconceptions that I know many guys have and, more importantly, solve a common paradox many students of seduction suffer from.

We’re going to talk about “attraction”, one of the most common terms in this field, which often gets thrown around without proper definition, making it confusing or meaningless.

Today’s post aims to clarify the concept of “attraction” in a better way, which will not only help you make sense of it but also assist you when reading future posts on seduction.

We will also delve into the psychology behind it, giving you a deeper understanding of the human mind, which will assist you further in your future adventures.

Sometimes the party ends too soon… the booze ran dry, the music stopped, the cops were called, or the darkness gobbled you up and swallowed you whole.

Pleasure is beautiful. It fills us with rapture and excitement. Even the prospect of pleasure imbues us with energy. We want to feel.

Pleasure wasn’t demonized by the Buddha, only the attachment to it, which is why he recommended the pleasures that come from meditation instead. Jhanas (meditative states) don’t have a double-edged structure like the pleasures of the flesh and mind do – yes, thinking and day-dreaming are in the same category as bodily pleasures, at least with respect to their addictive qualities.

They come and go, but they’re propped up on nothing but concentration and discernment. When they go, they don’t crash. Pleasures of the mind and flesh, however, can bring crashes – minor and grand.

Too many drinks can turn into a fight, a car accident, or drowning in your own vomit. Too much sex can turn into an unwanted pregnancy, a disease, or a hurtful situation (e.g., ruining a relationship). Too many hard drugs can kill you by their own hand or tempt you into taking yourself out of the game.

Every action has consequences. Many times, you will be safe, but it only takes one situation to end it all. What I want to do with this article is open your mind to the dark side of hedonism. There is a light side, and it is beautiful, but that part is easy to see. The hard part is facing the darkness and still smiling.

We each fall somewhere on the 9-sided moral alignment die. Lawful Good, Chaotic Neutral, Neutral Evil… where do you fall, and how does it impact things?

This should be a fun article. Or even an insightful one... depends how much you like personality tests.

... but most of us like personality tests, don't we?

And this one's a fairly useful one, as far as personality tests go.

A recent study discovered six 'dark' traits (egoism, narcissism, Machiavellianism, sadism, psychopathy, and spitefulness) all stem from the same underlying 'dark core'... something the researchers dubbed 'the Dark Factor of Personality'. The result is that if you have one dark trait, you are likely to have others -- because they all come from that same dark center.

Over the last few years I've thought a lot about dark and light. I discussed the phenomenon of younger 'dark' guys who reform when older in "The Civilized Man." I talked about the choice between goodness and wickedness in "The Good King." And I went in-depth on some of the research into the 'light side' of personality in "Be the Lightbringer: Dating and the Sublime Benefits of Positivity." And of course, aside from these, we've always urged you to do right by women and other people, and avoid bitterness yourself... as much for your own sake as for others'.

The seduction space can serve as a magnet for dark characters... even if most of the men in it are neutral- or light-oriented. The dark characters rarely reach levels of prominence within the community -- whether it's more because their methods repel the non-dark men too much, or they just don't care to help/teach other men enough to carve out a niche, I couldn't say. But there are guys like this who become instructors, or rise to this or that level of prominence within seduction communities... sometimes concealing their dark side, sometimes wearing it on their sleeves.

One of the reasons I won't teach 'dark side tech' -- things like reverse supplication, sexual power reversal, one-sided monogamy, taming/dependency, or the infamous October Man sequence --is the existence of 'dark-side' guys within the community (all the non-dark guys who'd cause damage purely by accident are the other part of the reason). If everyone was light-side, we could perhaps talk about this stuff and trust most guys to use it responsibly... but not everyone is, so this stuff stays tucked away under lock and key.

Why do people have these different dispositions? How different are the dispositions anyway -- are people just a little different from one another, or are the differences BIG? And how do these differences come about in the first place?

By pure chance, one day I came across a Dungeons & Dragons 'alignment test'. The test allowed you to sniff out where on the 'alignment scale' you fall... good or evil? Lawful, neutral, or chaotic?

I thought it would be a fun thing to play with. But in fact, it's turned out to be accurate for real people I've used it with, to quite a surprising degree.

Sometimes a girl will flake because she sees you as unattainable or as too high or low value. Here’s how to react, pass her tests, and get her to show up.

We were supposed to meet at 7 for drinks one weekday evening.

I sent her an anti-flake text at 11:10am that said “See you tonight, lady,” to which she did not respond. I showed up at the venue at 6:05 and didn’t see her anywhere.

I sent another: “Just got here.” Then I waited. I knew what was happening. I didn’t hear from her until 7:20.

“Hey! Sorry – lost track of time, such a busy day. I’m just going to shower quickly and then I’ll head over that way.”

We were going to have drinks about five minutes walking distance from her own apartment.

By the time she showed up, it was 8:45. In the meantime, I chatted with my buddies on my laptop, had a beer, and wrote about 1000 words of this article.

She arrived about two hours late and apologized profusely, but I could tell she was nervous as hell, and I knew why.

We didn’t go home together that night, but it’s only because she didn’t see me as attainable for what she was looking for at the time, and I ended up being too needy in my behavior. However, up to that point, everything was handled.

You might be asking, “Why in the world would Varoon wait almost two hours for a girl to show up to a date? I’d probably have left after about fifteen minutes.” Normally, if a girl is that late, I’ll just text her, reschedule, and preserve my own time.

However, this situation was completely different because the core issue in the girl’s behavior was my attainability, not my value. Just understanding that required a completely different strategy to handle the issue and preserve my chances. This girl knew my value and thus wanted to slow-play the dating process. To get her, I realized I had to play into that.

Want an easy way to make a girl want it more in the bedroom? Make your physical escalation go 10% slower than she wants it to go.

One of the biggest aspects of sexual enjoyment is not the actual sex itself.

During the act itself, you might use good technique and be passionate. These things help up a woman's enjoyment (and yours).

But like a young child biding his time until Christmas, it is the anticipation that heightens her enjoyment of the experience most. Good sex (like a good Christmas) is magnitudes better with proper buildup and anticipation before it.

How do you build all that anticipation in her? I talked about some ways in an article some years back: "How to Turn a Girl On: 3 Tiers of Sexual Excitement."

Today I'll talk about another way: escalating just slightly slower than she wants you to.

When your multiple-relationship lifestyle fills beyond capacity, one or more aspects will suffer. This advice will help you minimize heartbreak and stay on track.

Welcome back to the How to Build a Harem series, aimed at making you proficient in the art of dating several women long term.

• In Part 1, we talked about Queen Theory and why all the girls you’re dating must always feel like your number-one girl.

• In Part 2, we talked about some of the differences and issues between monogamous and non-monogamous dating structures.

• In a supplement to the series, we talked about how to manage the inevitable jealousy that occurs in a harem and the role of discretion.

• In Part 3, we talked about compartments and the role of precedence in how you treat the girls in your system.

In Part 4, we’re going to talk about the different tiers of girlfriends and how your lifestyle and capacity for girls work together. One of the most important things to understand about creating harems and dating multiple women is your own capacity to do so.

The whole point of the harem system is to be able to date the girls you like in a capacity which suits you, while also maintaining room to meet, sleep with, and date new girls when such opportunities arise. To do this, a man must structure his harem carefully.

If you’re a night gamer and stick to just a few venues, you’ll inevitably see a decline in momentum. Here’s why exploring new territory is so important.

Hey, guys.

So, this post is dedicated to more advanced players. If you are intermediate and into night game, then this post will also be useful for you. This is for those dedicated night gamers who have at least reached an intermediate level. Not because we’re going to cover anything super advanced or difficult to pull off. Even relative newbies will get something out of it.

The reason this post is aimed at advanced guys is that beginners should prioritize fundamentals, especially those of a universal nature. What we will discuss today is the opposite of universal fundamentals. Instead, we will get deeper into contextual factors and calibration. Those are helpful, sure, but only for those who:

• Are already able to get women through night game
• Have their fundamentals in check
• Want more consistent results

That said, if you are a beginner who happens to love the nightlife, or you really want to focus on this aspect, read on. However, I personally do not recommend focusing on this too much, as you have more important things to work on.

Anyway, we are going to make a case for how “there is no such thing as night game”. Well, there is, but there isn’t only one way to do things. In fact, the way nightclub seductions are performed varies a lot. This is cool because it makes things more exciting – no two nights will be the same.

However, this is not without its downsides, as it can make night game a bit challenging at times.