Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad | Girls Chase

Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad

The Problem with Direct Game, Pt 2: Killing All the Intrigue

direct game problemsShe might've liked you. But go too direct, and you sap all the intrigue (and hence, the FUN for her) out of the seduction… right along with your chances.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Last week I discussed some widespread problems with direct game. We saw that by giving women too much attention, direct game over-validates them.

Whereas men seek validation through getting laid, women seek it through obtaining sexual attention – knowing they have managed to win a guy’s compliance.

When a guy is using direct game, he gives a woman exactly what she wants. And for this reason, the dating market can seem flawed and unfair – because women get what they want (mostly for free) from men, while men don’t.

Men can achieve balance when they are more careful in giving away the attention women crave so much.

Some of you may think giving women what they want will seduce them and make them compliant to you. Well, not so.

Consider the following:

  • Would you be more compliant to someone who had something you wanted and gave it away for free right away in abundance?

  • Or would you be more compliant to someone who had something you wanted and didn’t give it to you straight away, making you work for it?

The second scenario makes you most compliant. Since you have to work to get it, you are compliant to that person. That person will control the frame.

This is how seduction works, and this frame is acquired only through indirect and not direct game. Direct game is the former, and indirect game is the latter. And the primary resource women seek is attention.

The Problem with Direct Game, Pt 1: Does Direct Game Work?

direct gameDirect game (where you never conceal your interest in a girl) gets a good wrap in men's circles. Yet it never works nearly as well as its proponents advertise…

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Last week, I attempted to debunk the perceived inequality between the sexes and their power on the dating market. It is easy for men to perceive women as more powerful because they get more attention, and therefore are more in control.

After all, men chase women for sex; they can say “yes” or “no” to their requests. Demand is high when it comes to sex with beautiful women.

Although both men and women seek validation, male and female sex drives differ in the source of validation.

Men get validation through sex, and women receive it through attention—more precisely, sexual attention—knowing that men find them desirable.

Both can enjoy sex and desire sex equally on a PHYSICAL and even EMOTIONAL level.

However, men are not only led by their drive toward sexual satisfaction but by their ego—their feeling of power and attractiveness from “conquering” a woman through sex.

Hence, men have two motivations to seek sexual encounters:

  • Their sex drive, which they share with women

  • Their ego drive

Females get satisfaction by having someone desiring them, which does not involve a need to put out.

We know that “putting out” and having sex left and right with men can lead to social consequences for women. Women fear the slut label, so they have fewer incentives to put out.

What Power Men (Really) Have in the Dating Game

power in the dating gameWhat power do men have in dating? It may seem like women hold all the cards. Yet men have one special thing at their fingertips that women desperately crave…

Are men totally without power in the current dating game?

It could seem so to many.  Today I would like to discuss this subject while discussing what gives women that “power” and whether or not this ends up creating a skewed dating game.

Many of you will start seeing this article as some rant – but truth is, it is not. It will start of with the typical “the dating game is unfair” type of narrative – usually shared by the manosphere. However, I invite you to read the whole article, since I believe things are not as one-sided (and if you came here to get a confirmation for your flawed “the world is unfair” type of belief – you may leave disappointed).

As a matter of fact I will later in this article move on to discuss what power men actually have.

No, we are not talking about the typical “men have economical and political power” which is the argument most feminist would give.

Whether true or not (most likely some truth in it) is completely irrelevant to our discuss because whether there are more men making up the elite (political and economic) has very little impact on normal men’s dating lives.

In fact, when discussing the subject of equality (and inequalities) between the sexes, the subject is always surrounding political and economical power. Yet, we rarely see “legal” inequalities being discussed, most likely because the results of such discussion would be contrary to the current narrative (men are usually disfavoured in courts of law – especially in cases regarding parenting, etc.).

Although kind of relevant to pick up and seduction, political/economical/legal power will not be the subject of today's discussion, because it has little impact on actual dating strategies and the mating process.

Video Messaging Girls, Part 2: How to Video Message Her

video messagingHow do you send a woman video messages that draw her in and get a response? There's a science to it… and it includes what you weave into the message, as well as the tone.

Hey guys, and welcome to part 2 of my two-part series on video messaging.

You can read Part 1 (on why video messaging girls is so powerful) here.

This will be the final article that will cover some practical guidelines on how to deliver the best video message ever.

Last week I shared with you my backstory and my failures when it came to texting my way to a date. This curse was finally broken once I started sending video messages instead – I saw an immediate big change, with girls either responding right away or at least sending a video response back (higher investment from her end). All my video messaging has translated into dates.

Last week, we covered all the reasons why one should opt for video messaging instead of texting (if possible). Some of the main reasons we listed were the following:

  • Video messaging allows her to see you, your look, your vibe, your body language and so on. It also allows you to speak more freely, which is good if you are a verbose guy like me.  But the most important thing is that you get to remind her of who you are and how you made her feel – triggering anchors that may put her back into the mood she was in when she initially met you. Very important.

  • It allows you to catch her attention when you are competing with tons of other guys trying to reach her. It is also low-pressure, unlike phone calls.

  • It shows balls and confidence.

  • If she responds with a video message herself you can see her, her vibe, her reaction and so on. This gives you key information to calibrate to.

We covered many more reasons in last week’s post, so consider checking it out. Today we get more into the practical realm on how to deliver proper video messages.

Video Messaging Girls, Part 1: Why to Video Message Her

video messageGirls may not always respond when you text. And many girls are too shy to answer phone calls. The ideal alternative? Leave women VIDEO messages.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Today’s post won’t be specific to COVID-19 (as I write this, the pandemic has taken over the world – sadly). However, what I will go over is relevant to our times.

I’m going to discuss an alternative to texting.

Digital communication is becoming the norm these days; with tons of options, but also plenty of limitations.

And I believe video messages to be the best way to interact with girls in this era of technological communication. I‘ll explain why I believe this form of communication to be WAY superior to other forms (texting in particular). Next week I’ll give you some guidelines on how I use video messaging.

Before getting into it, I will share a background story. I have been into seduction for years and have specialized in night game cold approach pickup. Ninety-percent or more of my lays have taken place on the same day or night when meeting girls.

There are several reasons why this is better than taking her contact details and going for a date at another time:

  • When you’re in front of her you have the most influence on her emotional state. Your presence can help you control the interaction and generate emotional spikes. When you’re away from her you have the least influence on her state.

  • The context in which you meet her affects her mood, hence her level of compliance to you. In a different setting – such as the day after, at her home – she will be in a different emotional space, and so may be less compliant.

  • You usually pull from the compliance you create when you meet her. You ride the spontaneous emotional spike you created that same night. When she leaves you that initial compliance spike may be forgotten.

When it comes to one-night stands, it is often easiest to get the girl on the same night you meet her. This has the highest success rate. Once you leave her, you are no longer in control of the interaction, or of her mood. It may fade, and you may lose your chances.

That’s why guys experience girls flaking or “vanishing” despite having initially had a good interaction with a girl. Personal contact info exchanged during night game is the least likely to result in a second meet-up. It is better in day game, although she may still flake, so same-day lays are also a great strategy.

Social Distancing at Nightclubs: Can You Still Meet People This Way?

social distancing at nightclubs
If nightclubs are open in your area, yet subject to social distancing restrictions, can you still meet women at them? Or are your nightlife prospects… LOCKED DOWN?

Hey guys.

Welcome back. This will likely be one of my last articles on COVID-19 for a while. I’ve shared all I know for now. Of course, if I make any mind-blowing discoveries or find something worth discussing, I will cover it for you.

Today I’ll discuss a topic I know many have been waiting for: clubbing during the pandemic.

I apologize for bringing this up so late. I prioritized this series of articles since not everyone has been able to go clubbing because of differing levels of lockdowns and restrictions. I preferred to cover themes that a larger audience could resonate with first.

Also, I did not cover this earlier because I believe clubbing with social distancing outright sucks. So much so that even a night gamer like me tends to favor other game types for now.

Hopefully, we will open up to something closer to normal soon. If all we have to do is wash hands, wear a mask, and “be careful” (not impose social distancing) when entering clubs, I will reconsider. But for the time being, I do not see clubbing as a good way to meet women, even though I have had some success.

Where I live, clubs are closed. However, I went to visit my homeland during the summer, and clubs were open. I spent some nights out there with my fellow wing, Halvor Jannicke. The observations I share here are mine and his. So he deserves some credit.

But even Halvor, as a fellow night gamer, is not very motivated in clubbing lately.

To be clear, we are talking about clubs where social distancing is required, and your freedom to move around and mingle is limited:

  • You will be led to a table with your social circle.

  • You are not always allowed to go to the bar to order. You must do so when seated at your table.

  • You can usually only get up from your table to use the restroom.

  • Some places have smoking areas; others don’t. So you have to step outside the club to smoke.

  • Can you mingle? Some places are stricter than others, but generally, it is forbidden.

In other words, the club experience has become quite crappy. So as you can probably already see, there is not much you can do.

But there are a few things you can do, and that’s what I will cover here.

However, it is looking grim for nightlife so far. I will share my solutions, although I’ll admit, they are not that good, and you will still be limited. If you are looking for ways to meet women during the pandemic, read my recent articles. I cover better ways to live out your sex life during this crisis.

Ping Girls During Lockdown & Wake Up Old Leads

pinging girls
If you're trapped under lockdown, what can you do? Well, one thing you can do is go through all those old leads in your phone… and start pinging.

Hey guys. Welcome back to my series on dealing with COVID-19 as a seducer.

(For future readers who may be reading this once this hell of a pandemic has passed: this article focuses on pinging girls during the pandemic but still contains useful advice on pinging old leads).

We find ourselves in September, and the prognosis is sadly not looking much better. There seems to be no end to this nightmare. If you feel that way, then rest assured, you are not alone. I am also very fed up with this situation. I sometimes dream of 2019, the good times, memories, amazing people, and the adventures from the field. It all feels like a distant past.

It is a horrible time to live in. 2020 sucks.

As our freedoms are on hold (hopefully not forever), we feel existential anxiety. That said, we still have a choice:

  • Rant and feel bad about it

  • Try to do the best with what we have

  • Or both (my case)

Anyway, this was my usual COVID-19 rant. Now let’s get on with today’s topic.

Today I want to discuss a subject that should have covered earlier: pinging old leads.

There is a solution I have seen discussed on pickup forums like skilledseducer.com and within my circles.

In this post, I will discuss the pros and cons of this solution, and give you my tips on doing it the best way.

Should One Even Bother with Dating During a Pandemic?

covid dating
This COVID pandemic has thrown a massive wrench in the dating game. In lockdown, meeting women is much harder, if not impossible. So, should you even bother right now?

Hey guys, and welcome back. I’ve recently shared a few guides and opinions on the COVID-19 pandemic and how it affects pickup and seduction.

If you'd like to catch up on those, here they are:

I know we live in frustrating times; and I will not hide it, I find these times frustrating, too. But I keep a cool head and carry on, trying to figure out ways to maintain my lifestyle.

Things will eventually get back to normal; when is the real question. I am not going to sit back and wait, though I admit, I am not as active as I usually am with my pickup and seduction hobby. So I do what I can to maintain my skills and keep some female company as I believe this to be healthy. Having girls around is healthy for my brain, especially these days when everybody seems to have lost their minds.

I know some of you are still questioning whether one should still bother with seduction at all during these times. This question is what I’ll cover in today’s post.

Alek's M.O. for Meeting Women During COVID – Plans B and C

covid dating
COVID-19 has brought challenges, but there’s always a way to flourish in the dating game. These backup plans will help you keep both of your heads happy.

Last week I detailed my overall dating game plan during the pandemic. I shared how and where I approach girls, and what I do beyond that to get them in bed.

Sadly, as many of you know, pandemic policies differ from place to place. My game plan may not fit where you live. Nevertheless, I hope you can get something out of my plan or find some tweaks to make it work for you.

Perhaps you can at least draw some inspiration from my game plan to create your own. I did my best to share my thought process and overall method to create my game plan. Feel free to take that and create a plan that best suits you.

Currently, we are in a phase where the social world has turned upside down. The rules of the game have changed, and we need to calibrate to that. Nothing is set in stone, nor is my game plan. It’s a time to experiment and rediscover our game (or discover it, if you are new to this). Of course, the situation is sad, but it opens up opportunities to rediscover good pickup strategies you may have neglected until now. I will not say we live in exciting times; that would be an exaggeration. But overall, there is an exciting element to it. This is what you should embrace; nay, it's something you must embrace.

Alek's M.O. for Meeting Women During COVID – Plan A

covid dating
Here I share my current modus operandi for meeting and sleeping with women during the COVID-19 pandemic. Dating can still be quite lucrative, you just need to adapt.

Hey guys. And welcome back. Today I would like to share my current M.O. (modus operandi) on how I’m dealing with the COVID-19 pandemic.

My M.O. may not work where you live, since lockdown policies are different everywhere (more tips on that here).

This makes it very difficult to write a clear-cut guide. For this reason, I was hesitant to share my game plan. Due to fluctuations in the pandemic and political climate, my game plan can change.

And this makes it challenging to make a straightforward “how to pick up girls during the pandemic” guide. At first, I hoped things would calm down and get back to normal. Unfortunately, it does not seem like this pandemic is about to end anytime soon.

I know this frustrates many of you, so I decided to share my plan. Maybe you can extract elements from it or use it as an inspiration.

The way to deal with this pandemic is by observing your current situation, analyzing the lockdown policies to find loopholes. This is how you can make a semi-decent game plan.

Lockdown policies can change, just as the course of the pandemic is ever-changing. You need to anticipate. This is one of Machiavelli’s core concepts from his famous book, The Prince. Virtue is one’s ability to deal with fortune, good or bad. Those who are prepared will survive unfortunate events, and unfortunate events will occur. Being prepared is being virtuous.

Enough political theory. The point is, this advice is particularly important during this time. You need not only to create a “pandemic” M.O., but you also need to anticipate changes. You can adjust your M.O. to changes. You may consider having other M.O.s if lockdown policies become more severe. Next week, I will share my backup B and C plans, which unfortunately may come into fruition since there is talk about a potential second wave in the works, and more strict policies may come with it.

For now, here is my current cold-approach M.O.