To Be a Fuckboy or Not to Be a Fuckboy | Girls Chase

To Be a Fuckboy or Not to Be a Fuckboy

Chase Amante

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how to be a fuckboy
The fuckboy: a guy who offers little more to women than excitement and sex... Yet whom girls keep coming back to, even if they say the hate him.

“Am I fuckboy?” I ask.

She laughs hysterically over the phone. “Oh yeah, for sure!”

I laugh. I expected this answer, as I’ve heard it from pretty much every other girl I’ve asked.

“You know what, actually,” she interjects, “I would say you’re a fuckboy, but you’re a little bit different. You’re definitely an asshole, but I don’t think you’re a fuckboy. I think it’s because you’re honest. You don’t trick girls. You are pretty straightforward about what you want.”

She’s a smart girl and one of the most loyal and devoted lovers I’ve ever had, so her opinion is more nuanced and, frankly, more important than the other women’s.

Whether through extended social circles or very long and frank discussions about my hobbies, philosophies, and the kindness that I show to friends, family, strangers, and lovers, it seems only those who spend a good amount of time with me have seen the lover beneath the fuckboy.

Yet, most won’t see that. To the majority of those I meet in life, I will be labeled a fuckboy and described as sexist, misogynist, disrespectful to women, and all sorts of nasty things.

I accept these labels if only to spit on those people. Anger and hatred is usually a sign you’re doing something right.

To explore then whether the fuckboy life is right for you, I want you to ask yourself a very simple question after reading this article.

To be a fuckboy? Or not to be a fuckboy?

That is the question.

But first…

Hector CastilloAbout the Author: Hector Castillo

Hector Castillo is the web’s top expert on getting laid in college. In his small town university, he went from World of Warcraft nerd to president of his fraternity in 4 years... And on the way, he bedded close to 50 women. To follow his life up close, follow his Instagram here. His book King of College is due out soon. Listen to the 40-minute interview with Hector on his story and some of his prized tech... and sign up for a 12-week coaching course with him, here:



Nolimits's picture

Hector articles like this need to be written! I think i fucked 18 women last year (only daygame ) but i still feel like a pussy and act as such way too often
Question: there is this girl, i like her a bit more than the others i ve seen, i told her about my player past but also hinted that with her is different ( big lie of course, but i felt very Jordan belfort while doing so). Now, i would love to make her understand that i m not big on monogamy. How do i do this?
How about:" You know i think there is no such thing as a sexy monogamous men but that sexy women are mainly monogamous. This is because women always have options and men instead have to proactively create them. So sexy man can't be monogamous. ." And then quickly changing topic without letting her answer.

I m afraid that if i say that she ll fuck other men as well ( not cool for my tastes ) , but It s still better than being doomed to monogamy and becoming a weak tamed pussy with no abundance.

Any tips my friend?

Hector Castillo's picture

What you're about to venture into is a bit murky on the morality scale and we should handle it with care. Send me a private message on the forums with your full situation and I'll see if you're ready for the answer.


Want to make her wet? I'll show you how.

nolimits's picture

Just sent that pm now. Can't wait to see what you suggest

Jimbo's picture

Until Hector replies, here's my take.

What do you care if she strays or not unless you already have an LTR in mind with her?

Anyway don't ask her permission to screw other girls if that's what you want. If she asks you about it, keep it vague; if she insists, tell her you are (if you are) or "not at the moment" (if you aren't).

Jimbo's picture

"The proof is in the pussy."

- Hector Castillo

Hector Castillo's picture

I have a quote now! Woo!

Want to make her wet? I'll show you how.

Jimbo's picture

“Women can’t be sluts and are destroying society if they are.” This is the cry of a beta-male who can’t compete with the men these girls are getting slutty for. He wants society to replace game.

Let's put the guys who decry this because they can't/won't compete for a second. It's still worth examining if these claims are true. One can play the game and still wonder on the deeper questions in more private, quieter moments.

And this one is a valid question: Will the widespread hookup culture truly destroy society and bring down civilization eventually? The argument is that this leads to the dissolution of the nuclear family, and that without it, civilized society would crumble.

Given that policing -- from laws to police departments to justice systems to (the threat of) prison/exclusion/etc -- is what keeps a semblence of order in society, what keeps it from descending into chaos and anarchy, should sexuality be included in this policing lest it results in a dysgenic mess?

I don't have definitive answers to these.

Chase has tackled similar big-picture topics before and I hope considers writing about this one, because it's a big one.

In the meantime, Hector, if you have anything to say about it, I'm all ears.

This was a great btw. Keep it up! ;)

Hector Castillo's picture

Well, it actually is true. If sexual freedom gets too crazy, it's slim pickings for pretty much the majority of men and only the most dominant men win in a sexual utopia (I think Alek wrote an article about this).

Slut-shaming DOES work (obviously) and eventually the Manospherians will grow enough in number to re-install a conservative society, since women will be so scared to sleep around, because the majority of men will call her a slut and refuse to sleep with her (okay maybe not the latter).

But because it works doesn't mean it's the best thing. Successful societies are successful because the majority of the men are, well, average. They work hard for the greater good and in return are rewarded with the basic guarantees - wife, kids, safety, etc. That's what most of the Red-Pillers want. And it's necessary, too. Only societies like Sparta can have a population of badasses, because they were completely ruthless (from harsh eugenics to maintaining a slave population to do their farm work and serve as target practice). But even then, most of the Spartans were "beta" in that they withdrew personal desires for the greater good and shamed men who wanted to be outliers.

So yes, policing and order ARE necessary. If every man was a GC reader, society wouldn't exist; it'd be a free for all of Sigma Males...or maybe it would be just the same as now, except on a much higher scale...I don't know, but it'll never happen.

The cycles of empires will continue ( Be whatever part of it you wish to be.


Want to make her wet? I'll show you how.

Jimbo's picture

If sexual freedom gets too crazy, it's slim pickings for pretty much the majority of men and only the most dominant men win in a sexual utopia.

You know what, that's what I used to think too, and that tends to be the conventional wisdom in the manosphere. But then you look around you, and you look at your own experience, and you see that it's not that hard to get a chick and keep her turned on, intrigued, and whatnot, even if you're an "average" man: I have a job that pays taxes, I'm not super-rich, I'm not hyper-macho dominant or antisocial bad boy in any overt way, and yet I can still pull tail in a sexually unrestricted environment of a modern country like the US; i.e. I can go out tonight to a club, gel my hair up, peacock myself, walk like I'm God's gift to earth, chat up three or four girls, tease them, make them laugh, keep sunglasses on and intrigue her by saying I can't take them off for reasons I can't disclose right now (that's just my personal thing during pickups btw -- and it works like a champ for those wondering (I also keep them during sex lol)), escalate, and take one of them home. So in that sense, a "beta" can definitely get laid with 30+ partners in his lifetime if he develops solid fundamentals and game; he can even be the poster fuckboy if he puts in enough effort to rebuild himself that way (be less available, display your flaws in a way they're not beyond repair, be hot and cold, etc).

I think the reason a minority of men seem to sleep with a majority of the women is that most men simply aren't bothered to acquire solid game and womanize. And I do have that feeling a lot of the time, it's like, "I already have a girl I'm seeing, I already have a pussy (not me, I mean my girl), why bother go pick up every night, go fuckboy with all the drama..." Most days I just want to chill and get ahead in my life, I only do that stuff every once in a while to keep my pickup skills and game honed.

Now the point of this, and what I was wondering in my earlier post is that, if we suppose that most men (say, 80%) could get partners, could this still be sustainable? In other words, is the risk of having a minority of men hoarding all the women the only (major) undesirable consequence of an unregulated sexual market? And if so, could this be remedied with game and, well GC material basically?

These coming decades if not years will be very instructive. It was thought that keeping women from achieveing financial independence, from owning land, and so on, was the way to ensure the productive men had wives. Otherwise women would flock either to the most dominant/high-status men or to the thugs, drifters, and every other variety of messed-up guy. And men would have less incentive to be productive/good citizens if that means they'll remain mateless. And there's truth in that. But now women are becoming financially independent, and they don't have to go for the 9-to-5, pillar-of-society type of guys--regular guys, iow. So we'll see.

One bad consequence of this which I thought could mean the gradual deterioration of civilization in the long run is the dysgenic result a liberalized sexual scene has on a society, wherein the most recklesss and "baddest" elements tend to outbreed the rest. And with today's welfare, everyone's kids can survive. Measures like sterilizing people on welfare and prisoners and such should be introduced if we want to keep both welfare and a liberal sexual market. But I have rambled enough for one comment, and I'll leave this for another day.

From the introduction, Fate of Empires sounds like an interesting read. Thanks for sharing.

Your Concerned Friend's picture

Did you have to define what "fuckboy" means while belittling historical definitions of the word?

It's out of place and calls question to your intent.

You probably don't mean to exude a subtle racist vibe but that's how I and your other black readers have and will most likely read this article - more so since those sentences weren't necessary to clarify what definition of "fuckboy" you are using.

Please clarify.

Hector Castillo's picture

If you read over it again, you'll see that I was specifically going after the Jezebel writer who was crying about cultural appropriation and basically being racist herself. You will also notice that I gave kudos to Killer Mike, one of my favorite rappers (but maybe this looks like a "I like hip hop so I can't be racist" argument. Who knows). Basically, no I'm not being racist, but from what I've seen on the internet lately, if someone calls you a racist, you're a racist no matter what you say in defense, so I guess it's up to you to decide. Though the Jezebellies would argue that minorities can't technically be racist, so if that's your thang, then I can't be racist since I'm Latino...

Not being racist. Hating on Jezebel.

Hope that clarifies things...


Want to make her wet? I'll show you how.

Alexander Abraham's picture

I needed this.

However, I do have a question:

How often should you ignore questions and how often should you actually answer them?

Example; if she asks if I'm sleeping with other women and I basically never want to answer it seriously I assume that I will have to eventually, right? How will I know when the time is right to answer it rather than deflect it?

I don't want to hurt people if I can help it, but as time goes on I'm getting a little more and more jaded about the whole thing thinking they must enjoy it. Not really sure...

Really?'s picture

Jesus Christ, this comment is really sad. Do you really think girls rate guys whether or not they reply to their message? So if Mr. Fuckboy only answers her 2 times out of her 10 questions and you answer 4 of them, then you are a nice guy right?

To attract woman is very simple: don't be yourself, but be the best version of yourself. What does that mean? You get in shape; you have your own vision in life (e.g. getting good grades, getting that dream job you are planning for, etc. but not getting girls.); you get your priorities straight. Women should never come first in your life,: your vision should be.

Then when you are pursuing your vision, you will naturally have less time for women, and they will start thinking that you are hard to get. Note that you aren't playing hard to get because you have to, but you are hard to get because YOU ACTUALLY ARE. You are busy chasing your dreams and vision.

But if I say there is no game to the "mating process", I would be wrong. Read Girlschase's article on being assertive, deep diving, and getting social proof from women. They are one of few articles that I really think help an individual as a person. These will help tremendously with your "game".

Alexander Abraham's picture

The hell was that all about?

Completely missed my question.

Question: how do you balance being honest with also trying to deflect question if you're seeing other girls or not.

Vermin's picture

That's what I was thinking too. Who the fook is that guy?!( Connor Mcgregor voice)

Alexander Abraham's picture

Hahaha I love it!

Hector Castillo's picture

Answer question you want to answer


Answer questions that are necessary (logistics).

I'll probably write an article on this, but you can legit ignore a girl's text and keep conversation going and sometimes, she won't say shit about you ignoring it. You'll notice she gets a bit more compliant and flirty after this, too. Try it out. Next time a girl asks a question you don't feel like answering, ignore it and then ask her out a few days later OR straight up ask her schedule after the "useless" text. You MIGHT look retarded or she MIGHT be like "wow, this dude doesn't give a fuck" and wet her panties.

As for the dude poppin' off in response to your comment - I don't know about him, but I've personally witnessed and have had girls confess to me that they do indeed judge everything a man texts and even have damn conferences with friends about how they should respond. If you think guys are overly analytical about texts and PUA, you should spend more time around women. They strategize like damn war generals.

In terms of big picture advice, he does make a decent point though. It just probably wasn't structured properly enough (considering your response, Abraham).

Want to make her wet? I'll show you how.

Alexander Abraham's picture

I was pretty sleepy when I read and commented.

But thanks for the answer! Though I'm not sure where everybody is getting texts from? But I assume the answer is basically the same in person?

Hector Castillo's picture

Hahaha, I guess I was influenced by the dude's comment and thought you meant "ignore questions" as in ignore texts!

LOL! My bad, homie. As for ignoring questions in person, especially about other girls, you can do that a lot of ways, but it depends on who she is in your life. If she's new, tell her you fuck other chicks, but be vague about it. Or be a savage and go into extreme detail. It's about what you from it. The more you talk a bout other chicks, the lower your attainability and the more fuckboyish you are. Ignoring the questions outright is a possibility, too, it's just super fuckboy and will either drive her crazy for you, or straight into auto-rejection.

Want to make her wet? I'll show you how.

Alexander Abraham's picture

Haha all good dude.

So it just comes back to balancing attainability and value...

That actually makes a lot of sense why I got rejected a little while ago when I went back home and saw a girl while I was there. Guess that last joke went a little too far lol :P


intermediate fuck boy's picture

Hector you are one hell of a writer.we need more articles like this on GC.Chase used to write explicit content articles such as this before but he has stopped of late.please to all authors on GC try and write like hector.
He inspires me to let the animal in me out.
They are way too many beautiful women in this world not bed.You simply have to be a fuck boy. When you think you have met or banged the most beautiful woman
You meet another that is worthy of your cock.
Hector you need to write more articles like this. Unleash the bad boy/fuck boy in us.keep motivating us to bed as many women as we can have in this lifetime. We only get to live once

Hector Castillo's picture

Hell yeah. Love the energy in this post. Got some cool articles coming up and I'm probably about to write my "Becoming the Beast" series next. Gonna be the craziest shit yet.

Thanks for the kudos, man.


Want to make her wet? I'll show you how.

Hum's picture

I pop in sporadically to this site, because Chase has some insight. But Christ alive, the articles from these younger cats are often retarded.

It's funny, men everywhere in all fields suffer the same problem in their 20s: they spout their bullshit like it's the gospel with supreme confidence, and have no clue how they are coming across to the rest of the world. Fresh PHDs are the worst.

This article reads more like a guy on a rant trying to justify his morally bankrupt lifestyle. Super weak. Buddy, if you answer questions like a politician you are pretty much lying. Sounds to me like you are trying to come to terms with hurting women. It's fine, we all rationalize to some extent.

A word of caution: being rewarded for behavior (in this case with sex) has no bearing on whether the behavior is morally sound/socially desirable. The notion that you have to go through a fuckboy phase to be a lover is also absurd. Frankly, fuckboys get a lot of flack because leave behind a path of destruction. The price for excess fucking around is a poor reputation. Quit your bitchin and moaning that being a fuckboy shouldn't be frowned upon. The sex should be salve enough at the end of the day. If its not, then sack up and change your conduct.

Narcissists abound.

Hector Castillo's picture

Yeah, Connor McGregor sounds, acts, and looks like the biggest douchebag in the world. But guess what, for a brief moment, before they made him hand over the title to Mr. I Got Knocked Out in 16 Seconds, he was a two weight-class world champion. In addition to this, and perhaps more importantly, he's now the UFC's greatest asset. Why?

Because he sounds, acts, and lokos like the biggest douchebag in the world. Would that have happened if he listened to anyone like you criticizing him, telling him to keep his hubris in check? Ahnawp. Results are what matter. and the only thing we have before we die.

I've seen enough failure in life to know that I'm a pile of skin, shit, and ash that might be obliterated at any moment. Your humility check is laughable at best compared to the looming threat of death.So what I come off like a cocky douchebag? Good, it's a writing persona and the damn article should be written with that tone, considering the subject matter. If you want to be as mature and understanding as you pretend to be, go read my Genuine Man series and realize that this is just an intermediary step. And did you even read the last part at the end of his one?

The perceived "bitching" you're complaining about was morally righteous anger that is intended to fuel guys with the balls to challenge the moral shaming that playboys receive in society. You beat moral superiority with stronger moral superiority. And I mean, really, what gave you the idea that I'm complaining?

Complaining is "this is wrong!!" Period. This article is "this lifestyle ISN'T wrong, don't let people like this guy shame you, and go live it."

And again, writing voice, intended to incite and entertain. I mean, I got you to spend however many minutes out of your very important day to respond to my article, didn't I? Thanks for the SEO. Incitement complete.

I've never seen or heard of a person who wasn't an extreme narcissist doing anything in this world worth mentioning. Even the goddamned Buddha himself was an arrogant prick who matched, surpassed, and then abandoned his teachers in search of a higher Truth, eventually bringing him to The Highest Truth.

Narcissism? Arrogance? Sound like compliments to me. The stepping stones of greatness.


Want to make her wet? I'll show you how.

Hum's picture

Nah man, Conor McGregor isn't popular because he's a douchebag, he's popular because he can talk a good game with his razor sharp tongue. I think you are confusing what's cool in entertainment (in this most extreme example, fight promotion) and what's cool in real life. Unless your articles should be read as entertainment, which is perhaps my mistake in assuming the content direction of this site. Not mutually exclusive of course, just differing levels of bullshit.

I think you are hung up on getting results as the major indicator of whether someone is living a good life. Not uncommon, or necessarily wrong, just something I would caution against. It's quite a mercenary outlook, and narrow. I know more than one hyper successful person who I would describe as the bottom of the barrel of society. Fuckboys fall into this category for many folks. Also, thnk you might be conflating non-conformity with arrogance, which I feel is inaccurate.

As for me taking time out to type and read, well A) I'm not important, B) I procrastinate on the internet just like everyone else.
Of course you think these things are compliments, you are probably slightly cluster B, an NPD male counterpart to BPD. Hopefully not, but look into it just in case.

Sam1231's picture

Just wanted to mention, that a Fuckboy is indeed not a cool playboy. Fuckboy is a hiphop term and has nothing todo with sex. Sry but this is the truth.
It's kind of sad to see kids use fuckboy as a compliment because they are such a playboy. Fuckboy means somebody who lies is weak as fck and is easy to be fucked with, a weak little kid to be precise.

Hector Castillo's picture

I already addressed this semantic issue.


Want to make her wet? I'll show you how.

Chase Amante's picture

Worth noting that slang words frequently originate among the lower classes, only to have their meaning warped as they move into the mainstream.

'Date' was originally a term used in the late 19th Century by lower class American whites to describe meeting a prostitute for sex. Within a few decades it was something high schoolers did. Another decade or so more and people in their 20s and 30s were doing it. And now a 'date' is a formal affair and most young people opt for 'hang out' over 'date' because 'date' sounds too formal. But if you go by the original meaning it's just banging a prostitute.

'Punk' originates to the late 16th century, as a slang word for 'prostitute' (another prostitution-related word). 'Punk' in its current use gained momentum in the lower class black prison population in the mid 20th century to describe a man who'd been prison raped and turned into "a girl." As in "I punked that new fish last night" or "Look at that punk - I'm gonna be up in his pussy later." By the 1990s or so, 'punk' was someone who dressed in leather with spikes on his clothes and wore a mohawk, and by the early 2000s 'punk' was anything alternative and cool. 'Punk' as a verb had some currency in the early 2000s in a lighter form than its prison verb form - now it wasn't about raping a guy, but making him look foolish. If someone says he punked someone right now, he probably means he fooled him, not raped him.

So yeah, these things change. I guess we all have our peeves. I won't use 'gender' to refer to anything other than gendered nouns and verbs. But that's as much a vote of no confidence in the field championed by John Money (originator of the term as it's commonly used now) and his gender-wielding disciples as anything else. And people using the word 'enormity' when they mean 'enormous' bugs me to no end. 'Enormity' means horrible, not big. If a newscaster talks about "The enormity of the building", I assume he's trying to tell me the building has really bad architecture.


Motiv's picture

Chase, I genuinely admire the intellectually enlightened view you routinely bring to these topics. It takes some of the frightening edge away, encouraging a rational sense of control in what otherwise can easily end up an emotionally runaway situation.

Order out of Chaos

TLDR: This is how a solid man handles this. Kudos!


She enters your world… not the other way around.
Tweak your way to the top ;)

phalon's picture

it doesn't mean that anymore....

DregenBender's picture

So what you're saying is I should do whatever the fuck I want and keep chasing greatness? When I'm ready then I can become a genuine man.

Motiv's picture

Hector, Fuckboy is my ultimate goal as a man.

I have not commented a whole lot lately, but you are one of the writers on this site who has truly inspired me to change my life, right down to making deep, gluttural noises when I come inside a woman — really makes it more intense for both of us. My most powerful sexual fantasy is being the lone man in a room full of hot, horny chicks all vying for my cock with me mustering the emotional energy to serve every last of one of those hungry gals my mini me's. I WILL make this happen before I die.

Meanwhile, I discovered over a year ago that I was (then) too emotionally fragile to indulge in hook-up practice too regularly. Today, I have two ongoing affairs with women who have changed my life (for the whopping better). They are both whole-heartedly devoted to me, showering me with nice new clothes, a constant supply of food, and regular dates for which they initiate and pay for 100% outright. They also come to me for sex each several times a week, knowing full well my lack of commitment — one of them is more of a cougar who regularly professes how awesome it is to have a young stud like me in her life.

If this all sounds like fairy tale, fear not — neither of them are exactly stunners… more like desperate housewives with decent looks. I am also a hard case when it comes to the nuts and bolts of game: as a latecomer, it feels confusing and frustrating to take it all in — only six lays in three years. I do have even deeper issues than racking up my lay count for now, and I've settled (temporarily) for my two married chicks — still learning amazing things about women from them…!

I have learned to shift my mindset from clueless regular guy to Byronic sigma (having broken from a past psychologically abusive teacher). Women tend to respond very positively to genuine expressions of emotional pain or trauma, especially if you as a man manage to keep a lid on it most of the time. This has sort of been my "I win" button among the women I've slept with, and because it is actually genuine, they usually reciprocate with real consolation (opening up their legs soon thereafter). This is a win/win in my book.

The Kehlani story… I've heard about it, but only because I've seen (and loved) the movie Suicide Squad. Her song is featured when the Joker essentially convinces Harely Quinn to commit suicide on his behalf — love that song. Playing it actually got a girl to reconsider leaving my place after I'd somehow made her feel unwanted. I boned her extra hard and she left with a smile (calling me her gangsta, too… not how I've ever pictured myself, but I'll take it).

Along this last subject, Hector, are there any details you might be able to go into about a maintaining a healthy emotional state as a fuck boy? For the time being, I hold myself in a sociopathic state to keep from losing my mind over women (probably deep social programming). I do hope apathy only be a gateway emotion to something more enlightened (and enjoyable).


She enters your world… not the other way around.
Tweak your way to the top ;)

Roger's picture

I think if a woman is into you she'll take your shit. Just depends on the chemistry. Act like a fuckboy around a girl who doesn't wanna fuck you and you accomplish absolutely nothing.

The reason why some of us are naturally inclined to this behavior is because we probably got the girl fairly easily. I haven't ever struggled to fuck a girl I had real chemistry with. But because in my head I'm thinking, "I already hit" or "it was such an easy lay" I'm naturally inclined to not give a shit. I'll text days later, maybe leave her on read or whatever. These are behaviors I can't control because I have abundance and I'm good in bed. Girls wanna keep fucking with me.

The truth is I really am nice to girls. I don't neg or play asshole because it can really backfire if the girl is already down. Confidence really is everything.

Jables's picture

A great article with concepts that I think every guy should have in his codex. Honesty and mystery are certainly important to have hand-in-hand.

One thing I've noticed among my friends, is that the least serious fuckboys (I.e. has no education, plays video games all day, doesn't have a job etc.) are actually the most succesful with women. This concept has confused me quite a bit - Why would girls go for someone who is "wasting thier life"?
I noticed that for me, it's almost better to hide the fact that I have a very important job and that I make a lot of money doing it - Girls simply go into auto rejection / starts seeing me as boyfriend material (Yuck!) before the courtship really begins. I usually prefer hiding it until we've had sex (or at least for day 2 / second date / whatever). While I do get girls addicted and have a very good return ratio after they've some day gone monogamous and broken up again, I've noticed that some of my friends who are "losers" but naturals at seduction do this at an even higher pace.

Jimbo's picture

A loser will often have an edge because he'll be more "out of the box" / "less mainstream" than you, which is sort of a requirement for a lover (unless everyone around her is a loser). In that sense, the Vanity Fair definition "and sort of a loser" was more of a description than an insult I think.

You say why would they pass up someone they KNOW is on the right track for one who may or may not... well that's the point: as the other commenter said, the game is over for those who are all wrapped-up husband-material, ready to go, there's no excitement nor challenge. Nothing to "work" on to make him Mr. Husband/Perfect/Committed.

Also note the guy in the kissing video is a drifter.

Jables's picture

Thank you very much for your input Jimbo.

So, for a guy like me who has it all going for him, perhaps throwing in a byronic flaw here and there might be a good thing. I am not into commitment and I follow most of BlackDragons nonmonogamous lifestyle advice to the core. I am non-needy, non-jealous, brutally honest and very clear about my non-commitment, which is probably where girls find the "thing they can work on" (They will not be successful. I despise monogamy in its entirety).

Despise from that one thing and the open player (and somewhat arrogant/asshole) attitude that I carry around, I just can't imagine myself getting more "loser" traits simply to have them. I like being successful and not having women as my primary focus in life. Perhaps I should simply focus more on being just a tad more of an ass every once in a while to keep things more interesting.

Jimbo's picture

The flaws can be anything that makes you not a perfect/good husband/boyfriend, or things that keep her on her toes. They don't have be big, they could be stuff like bad timekeeping, you having sudden bursts of rage, embracing some weird-ass ideology or having radically different opinions, sending her a (subtle or not) message that you're not good at being faithful, telling her you can't love and have never loved a woman, ... anything that gets her chasing, gives her a role in the relaionship, trying to fix those flaws and turn you into her own perfect guy.

That's one of the major types women are physically attracted to: the fixable fuckboy/loser/bad boy/just guy.

The other main type that turns women on is a guy who owns her and has authority over her. Basically be the clear-cut alpha in the relationship on which she'll depend and treat her like property (which everything this last phrase entails).

The first option has the positive of the girl sometimes providing for you and you often not taking any responsibility for her, but the cons is that girls who get into these relationships tend to be just okay-looking or plain (the hotter chicks rarely do, but you never know) and don't take care about their looks that well or try to look sexy for their bum guy. The second option has the positive of the girl often looking stunning (especially if you're rich) and keeping herself sexy, of being at your beck and call and being your toy (once you train/domesticate her well), but on the flip side you'll have to make most/all of the decisions, steer the ship, and provide for/protect the girl that you have authority over. You'll also have to discipline her every once in a while when steps out of line or messes up (which she'll enjoy).

If you want your girl to stay turned on and devoted to you, pick one and be that. Anything other than those, like an egalitarian relationship with a perfect/good guy will leave her bored to death and contemptuous towards you.

All the best.

Jimbo's picture

That type where the girl chases to lock you down or turn you into a perfect boyfriend, Chase talked about it in more detail (and more sober terms) in his article about relationships and like when they hit the boredom phase (forgot the name) look it up.

Matthew C.'s picture

This article just confirmed something I already began to sense; women love men who drive them batshit crazy and lay pipe pretty well. At my job, you can get fired pretty easily for sexual harassment or dating co-workers but I've always been a sleazeball with some of the MILFs at the office and they love it (not at first though). I will continue in my fuckboy ways because it truly is an adventure like no other. Cheers.

Jack's picture

Hi, im rather new to the pick up business and would like to ask something. In the article you wrote "That’s how women get things in this world – they complain. Don’t hate them for it, it’s how it works." Now it may not be exactly what you meant that I want to ask about, however here it goes. Lately I have noticed that women start to complain about their life in a pessimistic way. Now I try to change the course of the conversation but often it is rather hard. Even though I do see signs of attraction and know that the girl wants more than just a shoulder to cry on it seems like Im an ideal target to cry about how ugly and terrible her life is. Just this last weekend I had this chick which within like 20 minutes of light banter started telling me all of her life's problems and disasters. It got me to a point where I started wondering what mistakes am I making ? And how come many girls seem to be pessimistic

Jables's picture

I'm assuming that you are referring to girls whom you haven't yet slept with. If the concurrent women in your life complains (about other things than you), that's usually a good sign of Investment. (If they complain about you, you should soft next them).
Now, if that's the case, you're probably 1) coming off as too friendly and not at all playful or 2) Reinforcing negative subjects.
If you're not being at least somewhat flirty, girls assume that you are just being friendly and will treat you like a friend (But you are still trustworthy enough to open up to early, which means that you do have some social skills).
If you're reinforcing negative subjects, you need to calibrate your social behavior. When you Deep dive or engage girls in conversation, don't ever dig into the bad stuff too early. Change the subject. Find something that she is passionate about, but in a good way.

However, if you already have them on rotation, you should love them talking about stuff if your goal is to have them as a relationship and not just as fucktoys. I certainly let my three MLTRs tell me about the bad stuff in their life as well (But they know that I will show them the door in a second if those complaints get directed towards me, which is of course standard in any monogamous relationship)

Davido's picture

To answer the poster above me, your case is easy to deal with, let them come and cry on your shoulder and use that as your fuckboy platform and it's obvious that's why they cry to you in the first place from my personal experience.
The writer of this article is indeed a fuckboy also, because only a fuckboy can write an article like this that explains every step of my fuckboy life, even myself I had no idea what I was doing until I ran into this article and was nodding my head all through.
I have caused serious commotion between two girls at the club and at the end of the day a neutral girl came to my rescue when she saw my shirt locked up and the girls on my neck, guess what I eventually fucked the girl that rescued me.
I didn't know I was a fuckboy or anything, I just happened to have control of these relationships, they put gas in my car even though I earn a good salary, dinners, movies, clothes, bought stuffs for my new apartments, and I wasn't even fucking them to satisfy them, because satisfying them was not even something I was thinking of.
It's amazing how bad boys win all the time with women, maybe because I wasn't monitoring them and with me they had all the freedom they wanted, and they only wanted to take away my own freedom. This kind of relationship will last as long as you want, once you notice things are going bad, you just do the rinse and repeat. The friends of these girls also approve of me compared to other guys they dated, they all said you are not a boring guy, and the interesting part is I was able to lay one of the friends who told me her friend I was fucking showed her my junk on her phone, we laughed about it and after some few months ended up in bed when I got the vibe that she also wanted the D.
Women are amazing and interesting to be, don't take things personal.... welcome to the grind

pork sausage's picture

What up Hector, loved reading this article! Thanks to yourself and other authors I've managed to start a relationship with my idea of a perfect ten girlfriend, couldn't have done it without GC! I found myself smiling and nodding with familiarity as i read through this article though ;) I've taken a part time job as a bartender, and I've noticed you mentioned in a few of your articles that you've spent some time in that profession. I was wondering if you have any fun tips for when you're working in hospitality to raise and maintain abundance (or for single guys, get laid while getting paid). There's the basics like eye contact, sexy smiles etc but I imagine you have some cool ideas or stories? Keep up the awesome writing!

Denton Fisher's picture

lmao starting some media fire up in this b&^tch! Haha like the article. Jezebel needs to chill out.


No matter how fast you run you will not reach your destination if you are blind. Don't be an idiot.

Jimbo's picture

Some girls openly admit they like the player: -- kind of made their peace with it.

Jimbo's picture

Hey Hector! Have you heard of this litboy guy chicks have been ranting about lately?

He's like a fuckboy, but of the arrogant/know-it-all intellectual variety. What's up with that?

Connectedly, I'd like to suggest Chase to consider an article on how to be this litboy type of book-smart guy some girls seem to be enthralled by (as opposed to the unattractive nerdy one). I'd probably never be him cause I don't really have the looks or demeanor of the typical intellectual guy, but it'd still be interesting to know what chicks find alluring about this guy. Thanks!

Mick Yayger's picture

Ive heard fuckboy defined in lotta different ways.

'An honest man with integrity' is definitely a new one.

I applaud you for your creativity

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