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Why Am I Not Good Enough for Her?

Hector Castillo's picture

not good enough for her
You want her, but you don’t think you’re good enough. Well, you’re probably right. But there is a solution! It’s not quick. But it’s doable, and it will work.

“Why am I not good enough?” you ask?

You aren’t good enough, that’s for sure. And the “why” part is easy. Not sure if you expected that answer. Welcome to Girls Chase.

I’m not here to tell you that you’re good enough. That you’re fine the way you are. That would be a lie. It might make you feel good for a few seconds, even a few minutes. Tomorrow, you might remember it. By the end of the week, you’ll have forgotten it. You’ll scroll through Instagram and see some gorgeous girl pop up on your feed. Maybe you know her. Maybe you don’t.

What is true is that she’s not your girl. You’ve never kissed her. You’ve never made her wet. You’ve never been inside her. Hell, you’ve probably never even been on her mind for longer than the brief moment your image passed through her focus.

Then, like a bubble, you disappeared. Have you been with a girl of her caliber? Have you been with any girl? Depending on your answer, the thought of “I’m not good enough” and the question of “Why am I not good enough?” will receive this response from the universe:

“No, you’re not. Because you suck.”

If reading that pisses you off, stop reading now.

The Journey to Become a Master Pickup Artist

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

how to master pickup seduction
Practically anyone can go from sexless to seduction mastery if they do what it takes. But what does it take? Be ready for a long journey… but one that’s worth it.

One fateful day, I was sitting with a few roommates in my living room, staring bovine-like at the dull, hypnotic glow of the television. A news program came on about pickup artists. A coach was taking a group of awkward men around to various bars and parks, forcing them to approach women. The coach said that any man, no matter who he is, can learn to seduce women with skill.

 

What Does It Take to Master Pickup?

I ran to my room and googled “pickup artist” while the rest of my roommates picked at their teeth and turned on the PlayStation.

I discovered a whole community that existed in forums, where people discussed PUA philosophies. I read dozens of books like Mystery Method and Double Your Dating. I watched hours of video like The Annihilation Method by Style and so many others. I felt like Harry Potter when he finally realized he didn’t have to live as a muggle anymore – there was a land where magic was real, and with that magic, he could finally get a smoking hot, little pixie to do his sexual bidding. And so, I immediately… did nothing at all.

It took me a year of studying before I decided “enough” and moved to Montreal for the sole purpose of becoming an expert in pickup. Not because I wanted to start a business or impress people on YouTube. Because I wanted to date beautiful women. I didn’t just want to be good at it – I wanted to master it. I wanted to be a Jedi with women.

I went out seven days and nights a week for almost two years. And boy, did I suck at it. It was the hardest but one of the most critical things I ever did, and I don’t regret one tiny bit of that journey – except for that time I caught molluscum from a handjob.

My first night alone at a bar in romantic Montreal. I stood there in that crowded room, surrounded by beautiful people having fun – and pretended to be on my phone.

how to master pickup seduction
Yeah, I’m just waiting for my friends. That’s it. Don’t look at me.

Then, after a few more failed nights of inaction, I actually tried approaching girls. Most of them ignored me or were outright annoyed. Some held up their hands, ushering me away. Others just pretended they couldn’t hear me. It was terrible.

A few weeks later, I started getting better reactions and even a few phone numbers. Then, on my 90th night out, I finally got laid.

The Dark Side of Hedonism and the Party Lifestyle

Hector Castillo's picture

dark side of hedonism and partying
Sometimes the party ends too soon… the booze ran dry, the music stopped, the cops were called, or the darkness gobbled you up and swallowed you whole.

Pleasure is beautiful. It fills us with rapture and excitement. Even the prospect of pleasure imbues us with energy. We want to feel.

Pleasure wasn’t demonized by the Buddha, only the attachment to it, which is why he recommended the pleasures that come from meditation instead. Jhanas (meditative states) don’t have a double-edged structure like the pleasures of the flesh and mind do – yes, thinking and day-dreaming are in the same category as bodily pleasures, at least with respect to their addictive qualities.

They come and go, but they’re propped up on nothing but concentration and discernment. When they go, they don’t crash. Pleasures of the mind and flesh, however, can bring crashes – minor and grand.

Too many drinks can turn into a fight, a car accident, or drowning in your own vomit. Too much sex can turn into an unwanted pregnancy, a disease, or a hurtful situation (e.g., ruining a relationship). Too many hard drugs can kill you by their own hand or tempt you into taking yourself out of the game.

Every action has consequences. Many times, you will be safe, but it only takes one situation to end it all. What I want to do with this article is open your mind to the dark side of hedonism. There is a light side, and it is beautiful, but that part is easy to see. The hard part is facing the darkness and still smiling.

The Life Benefits and Costs of Learning Seduction Game

Varoon Rajah's picture

cost and benefits of learning seduction game
Should you focus more on your career or your game? Ultimately, both are important aspects every man should invest in as early as possible to be truly happy in life.

I recently visited my friend in Seattle during an extra-long layover on a business trip – he’s admittedly far less woman-experienced than me, but he’s also a decade younger. I was asked a question I see asked often in various ways – how valuable is it to learn game as an investment, as far as effort versus rewards is concerned?

We do have some articles covering this on Girls Chase:

Considering my friend’s question, I thought I’d add my own perspective on the importance of learning game in life versus focusing your effort on other endeavors.

Sex and women are one of the biggest drives that men have by nature, and it’s no accident. We’re designed to reproduce, and we’re designed to seek and screw women. But despite this, the truth is that most men are terrible with women. The majority – probably 95% – don’t find or follow websites like Girls Chase, nor bother to learn (or even attempt to see the importance of learning) how to become better-suited to attracting and keeping the opposite sex. Often, it’s deemed unnecessary or too hard to warrant the effort.

There are also guys who see other men doing well with women and assume that this kind of success isn’t even possible for themselves. Minorities often hold this view, believing that it’s impossible for them to attract the same kind of women more skilled men get. Other guys notice that men in certain social circles tend to do better than others – a bartender, international tour guide, or frat bro versus your average Joe, for instance.

Well, there is some truth to this, but it’s worth examining more closely because your experience with women is tied to the timeline of your life, and your ability to attract women as a man is largely determined by how much effort you put into learning about women.

As you’ll see, there are no accidents when it comes to why certain men do better with women – and get hotter girlfriends more frequently – than other guys.

Does Good Seduction Game Actually Work to Attract Women?

Tony Depp's picture

does seduction game attract women
Does having good game impact whether a girl will be attracted to you? Short answer: yes, if she allows it to. A few key factors influence whether or not she will.

It’s newbie question time!

Hi, Tony.

I’m very curious about predictable patterns you’ve noticed in women’s behavior that they exhibit immediately after you act a certain way towards them or use certain techniques on them at the right time. For example, after you pass their screens, get past their resistance, or qualify them at the right time, they stop controlling some of their attraction for you.

Their compliance threshold increases and they’re overall more open to moving forward with you. Just how much does this compliance threshold increase on average, and how long do you have to take advantage of it before it decreases? And have you noticed women saying relatively the same thing during this time? Do they actively try to build similarity with you? 

Hope that made sense. Thanks for taking questions!

Okay, I’m going to break this down from nerd-speak into plain English.

“I’m very curious about predictable patterns you’ve noticed in women’s behavior that they exhibit immediately after you act a certain way towards them or use certain techniques on them at the right time.

Translation: “Does game actually work?”

Yes, it does, if the woman allows it to. There must be some minuscule amount of attraction locked away deep in her heart. It may have alarm bells, locked doors, and security guards. If this is the case, it’s your job as the seducer to break in and steal it.

How to Create a Loving Vibe That Attracts Women

Tony Depp's picture

attract women with love
Your state of mind creates a vibe that can attract or repel women. Use these tips to develop an aura of love that attracts women like bears to honey.

Many years ago, I was on Vacation, visiting a friend from the PUA community. He lived in a small town in Northern Canada with a surprisingly big nightlife. After a long evening at the bar, he asked if I wanted to go to an after party. Of course I did.

“Here, take one of these,” he said, handing the group a bag of white pills.

“What is it?” I asked.

“MDMA.”

I’d only tried MDMA once, and it was a crazy adventure. So I decided to give it one more shot. I popped the pill and we headed out to the party.

MDMA basically turns your dopamine up from zero to twelve, and as our group walked to the party, we all started giggling like school girls. By the time we got there, we were tripping hard. I felt this incredible joy and love for everyone and everything.

I sat down beside this pretty girl, and in about ten seconds, we were making out. I don’t remember what I said, but I felt an intense attraction, mixed with incredible vulnerability. It wasn’t my words that seduced her, but my vibe.

The problem with drugs and alcohol is that they come at a cost. Alcohol causes hangovers that wreck your day. Drugs like MDMA are the same – you get an emotional hangover. What goes up must come down. I don’t advocate using hard drugs, and I haven’t touched them since. But I did learn something powerful that night: that whatever you feel, she feels.

How to Be a Gentleman and a Cad

Hector Castillo's picture

how to be a gentleman and a cad
What does it take to be a gentleman who attracts women? Present yourself well, be respectful, and fulfill her need to be ravaged in the bedroom.

Every good student aims to follow in the footsteps of his mentors. I, therefore, dedicate this article to Chase Amante. It’s my pleasure to stand on the shoulders of a giant and offer my thoughts on what I’ve learned from him about being a gentleman.

In his article on how to be a gentleman, Chase’s main premise is that you can be respectful and treat women well but still bed them quickly. I want to take that a step further and go into detail about how you can be a dirty MF – while also being a gentleman.

Let’s start with threads.

Franco & Amrit | Dating Your Dream Girl as a Minority (Podcast)

Varoon Rajah's picture

Welcome back to another episode of Dating Mechanics! I’m Varoon Rajah, and today we explore a topic that frequently comes up on the Girls Chase boards – the question of dating your dream girl as a minority.

What Personality Will Help You Get the Girl

Hector Castillo's picture

the personality to get the girl
Does your personality determine which types of girls you do best with? Which girls go for what, and what can you do to get the type of girls you want?

Almost every personality type can get girls. Some personalities are more naturally inclined to extroversion and socialization, so they tend to do better than more introverted personalities, but there is also strength in subtlety and grace.

The questions you need to ask yourself when considering who to become are these:

Each personality does well with specific other personalities – usually those that are similar.

As Chase has gone over extensively in One Date and The Dating Artisan (the best dating products on Earth), similarity is one third of what gets a girl into bed (arousal and compliance being the other two).

Note that as I describe these personality traits and women who gravitate towards them, there are always outliers and exceptions. I’ll be speaking in the general sense. In other words, this is how things usually play out, meaning that certain personality types will have “better” chances with particular girl types. I’m not taking the luck factor into account or guys with good enough game to overcome general trends.

For example, if you lean towards introversion, you will be better suited to a certain type of girl. You will do best with shy, less-attractive women. Extroverted guys will also be good with these women if they can lower their guard, but more often than not, these girls tend to gravitate towards introverted guys.

To most guys, of course, they’re not the most desirable of women. If you are an introvert but have great fundamentals, then you can land super-ambitious businesswomen who are fawned over by CEOs and business tycoons. These men are usually extroverts, but there are far more extroverts who are wild party guys than there are extroverted businessmen. The women in question like the extroversion of the party guy but not his comparatively carefree life. He’s not a serious prospect for a girl whose reputation is everything to her and her business.

Of course, there might be an artist who’s amazing with women and will absolutely kill it with ambitious girls, but they will probably gravitate towards a more serious type of guy. These are generalizations for the sake of painting a clear dichotomy, but personality differences reach far beyond the basic dichotomy of extroverted versus introverted.

As I’ve written in my article on girls and their types, you need to be what they want, and sometimes that can be complicated. Despite having a lot of similar features, we are vastly complex beings.

3 Pivotal Tips for Learning Game as a Young Man

Daniel Adebayo's picture

learning game as a young man
Hindsight is perfect. If you’re a young man yearning for a life full of hot chicks, here are 3 tips we older guys wish we implemented at your age.

So, I celebrated my 20th birthday a few months ago, and right now, I’m just a couple months away from entering my fifth year as a seducer. It’s been quite a journey since that day back in my mid-teens, when a high school friend of mine put me onto Neil Strauss’ book, The Game.

That night, as I stayed up until morning reading, my eyes opened to the wonderful world of seduction. It was like a portal to something new and immersive had been revealed to me. This discovery was the first step, ultimately leading to me becoming a part of the seduction community. I’d easily say that it was one of the pivotal moments in my life.

As you might have guessed from the title of today’s article, this one’s going to be for our young readership here on Girls Chase; the teenagers, high-schoolers, and college freshmen who are just getting into this world of seduction or have already started their journey on this path.

Now, I must say that when I first started learning about seduction, I wasn’t quite sure what to think.

Most of the seducers were skilled guys, posting lay reports on forums for the newcomers who were reading the articles and asking questions hoping to learn some of the skills involved to try and get a girlfriend. The majority of the seduction masters tasked with the challenge of teaching all these newcomers and helping them grow were several years older than me.

You see, capable seducers who had started their journey back in their teenage years were rare, so the already-difficult path of becoming skilled looked even more difficult because there weren’t a lot of reference points for young seducers like myself to draw from. On top of that, it seemed like there just wasn’t a lot of advice out there targeted specifically for young men.

So, in this article, I’m going to talk about certain aspects of learning seduction as a young man and, more importantly, give the advice I wish I could have gotten back when I put my boots on the ground for the first time at the age of 15. Let’s get right into it.