(1) Beginner

Women are attracted to confidence, and anxiety is the opposite of confidence. So if women don’t find anxiety sexy, but it’s a normal feeling, what can we do about it?

Having recently lost a lover because of anxious thoughts, I figured it would be useful to cover how to address anxiety with women and dating.

While anxiety is a normal human emotion, some people feel it more than others. It’s a terrible weakness to display around a woman and is the opposite emotion from a “turn-on” and sexual excitement.

Think back to your most memorable sexual experiences, if you’ve had some. Was anxiety present? Would anxiety have helped the experience? If yes, did the anxiety make the situation better?

Most likely, your best experiences around women involve no anxiety at all. But if you’ve had experiences that did include anxiety, and I’ve had many, I can attest that these moments become question marks in women’s eyes.

Anxiety, especially if it shows up at critical moments like the first kiss or the first escalation, can ruin your chances to get a woman and keep seeing her.

Men will often experience anxiety and nervousness in critical moments during a seduction:

• The approach
• The first date
• The pull home
• The first kiss and first sexual escalation

On the journey of getting better with women, men must train themselves to never feel anxiety around women, particularly in the critical moments mentioned above. As a rule, it’s best to avoid showing any anxiety around a woman you want to be sexual with.

You mad, bro? Do you allow other people and things to throw off your groove? Learn to control anger, and you’ll reap the many benefits of a level head.

Why is it possible for some men to control their anger, while others rage at the slightest annoyance? Is anger something we can harness and use for personal growth, or is it completely useless?

The Road Rager

When I think of a man who struggled to control anger, I think of my father.

In my early twenties, I worked for him as a furnace repairman. We’d drive from house to house, repairing broken heaters, always under stress to reach these jobs on time.

Traffic was usually busy, and my dad was a road rager. I recall one of many occasions when we were on the freeway, and a car merged in front of us. It was a little too slow for my chain-smoking speeder dad, so he went full red zone, flew up beside this car, rolled down his window and screamed, “Where the f%#k did you learn to drive a$$hole!?”

This time, it was an eighty-year-old woman. He calmed down as if nothing had happened and went back to driving.

In the three years I worked for him, I witnessed many similar situations where he lost control. Sometimes he’d get out of the van to storm off toward someone, and I’d think he’d be better suited as a swordsman in a Roman legion.

He wasn’t always violent. He’d just become annoyed at anything he perceived as idiocy. The toast wasn’t perfect? He’d call the manager over and point it out while I sat there, red-faced. He just really couldn’t control anger, and I couldn’t relate at all. Maybe that’s why I rarely get very angry, and see it as silly.

The longer you’ve been together, the harder it is to cope with a breakup. The key is to distract yourself until your emotions settle, and do things that move you forward.

Have you ever had to cope with a breakup?

Unless you’re a virgin, or you’ve never had a girlfriend, then you know that no matter which side you’re on, breaking up is never pleasant. At the worst, it’s highly traumatic; at best, it's an uncomfortable chore.

Even if you don’t really like the person that much, you probably liked them enough to have sex at least once. This means there’s a certain degree of trust and a shared experience (sex). If you’ve slept together many times, then emotional bonds exist, like it or not.

Even when a breakup is a good thing for you in the long term, the process still sucks donkey balls. Humans are wired to have empathy. If you see someone bleed, you feel yourself bleed; if you see someone laughing or crying, you laugh or cry with them. We feel what other people feel. These are mirror neurons at work.

Breakups hurt no matter what.

This weekend, Chase posted an article titled "Can You Still Meet People During Coronavirus?" The article is jam packed with great statistics and details about what to expect in the coming weeks and months, and how your dating life could be impacted by the COVID-19 pandemic. Depending on your local quarantine situation (or whether you've chosen to self-quarantine), the answer to the title question can feel pretty bleak.

You could be facing weeks of strict social distancing or complete isolation. If so, after you've sorted out your good-citizen strategy to slow the spread of the virus, you may suddenly realize a greater need to tend to your sanity.

We may not be accustomed to our new (albeit temporary) way of life, but that's no reason to let ourselves stagnate by just waiting things out. In fact, a global pandemic is a great excuse to have a quarantine vacation and focus on inner game and lifestyle work.

I define inner game as everything that makes you proud and happy to be you. So whatever you do that improves the quality of your life will increase your inner game.

Rather than obsessing over the constant stream of news about the coronavirus and resulting economic perils, we can use this time to improve the neglected areas of our lives, like health, wealth, and happiness.

Focus on what you can control. By doing so, you'll come out the other end of this thing more ripe, not rotten. So here are 10 things you can do to improve (or at least occupy) yourself during your coronavirus quarantine.

As coronavirus locks down the world, can you still have a social life… and what ARE the real risks of the disease – should you risk a venture outdoors? Image credit: Kukuruyo.com

Coronavirus is sweeping the Western world now, after having already swept across East Asia.

Somehow, despite the existence of this website, and the half million to million people who read it every month, there are apparently more men desperate for female approval than ever in recorded history.

There is an outright simp epidemic.

Is there anything sadder than a man who swallows his pride, pedestalizes the feminine, and launches limp-wristed attacks against his fellow man in a feeble attempt to curry favor with women?

Truly, there is no man more tragic than the simp.

First, here is the SIMP TEST. Watch this video, and pay careful attention to your emotions:

SIMPING IS KING SHIT CONFIRMED pic.twitter.com/B7kF1f6wfN

— Ching (@Hotline_Ching) March 10, 2020

Did you experience a sort of cognitive dissonance, and a kind of revulsion that says, "Though this woman is young and attractive, I find her oddly and off-puttingly moronic, and I also think she is lying?"

Congratulations, you are not a simp. The rest of this article does not apply to you.

However, you may want to read it anyway to make especially sure to inoculate yourself against the dangers of simp-dom.

On the other hand, if, when watching that video, did you not experience any cognitive dissonance, and instead experienced a swelling of pride? Did you feel something along the lines of, "This beautiful woman recognizes me for my superior quality?"

If so, I regret to inform you you are a carrier of SIMP.

But don't fear.

There is a cure.

If you follow my 10-step method, we can restore your testosterone levels to normal, train you to prefer manly domination over effeminate obeisance, and make you a man women actually respect and desire to sleep with (perhaps even chase), rather than one they manipulate then giggle about as he conducts himself in embarrassing fashion on their behalfs.

To stop being nervous around women, you need to interact with people and gain a level of social normalcy. You just need more experience, and here’s how to get it.

Would you like to stop being nervous around women? You’re not alone.

Every student I’ve taught told me they have approach anxiety. Why do they suffer? Because they don’t know what to say. They don’t know what to say largely because they’re nervous.

It’s an evil feedback loop of despair.

If it weren’t for nervous men, I’d be out of a job. It’s the #1 reason most of us find the seduction community. Not because we want to be big pimps, have harems, and run a pickup company. We just want to be able to attract women.

I used to be very nervous around beautiful women.

When I was a kid, I developed man boobs, otherwise known as gynecomastia. Nothing hurts a young man’s self-esteem like having tits. Also, I was raised by a single mother and two sisters who surprisingly taught me nothing about attracting women.

I was horribly insecure, especially around the pretty girls. I couldn’t talk to them because I’d get too excited. My heart would start racing, and I’d sweat, stutter, stammer, and have panic attacks. The girls would just look at me with concerned expressions and ask, “Are you okay, Tony?” This happened often enough to be a big problem.

I did date a few girls: the ones who basically threw themselves at me. But because I was so needy, those relationships rarely lasted longer than a month. I felt that if I screwed up a relationship, it might be years before I found another girlfriend. Of course, this desperation drove the girls away.

That is, until I got liposuction, and found the pickup advice forums.

On the forums, I learned about “game.” How to cold approach women in bars, day game, push-pull, teasing, stories, cold reads, future projections, and on and on. So I started going out to practice, to change my life with this new arsenal of tactics, techniques, and philosophies. This was it, I thought, I’m totally going to pick up hot women with all this knowledge!