(1) Beginner

What should you send a girl you match with online? These 7 key messages make all the difference — turning matches into dates & lovers.

Just like cold approach, texting is a skill you can refine over time. With practice, you can become so proficient that you won’t even need to go on dates—girls will come straight to your place for sex. (If you want more details on that, check out this example of how an average guy got laid.)

Similar to cold approach, I’m not a fan of being overly scripted. That’s why, despite receiving numerous requests, I never put together a rigid texting sequence. That said, I’ve found a few messages that work really well. Use these in your texting game, and you’ll be way ahead of the competition.

Girls don’t show up to dates they don’t feel motivated enough to show up for. Use these 7 ways to raise women’s desire to show up for their dates with you.

You meet a girl, have a nice conversation, and ask her out.

She says “yes!” Fantastic!

But just because you’ve got her contact and an appointment to meet doesn’t mean she’ll show up. What can you do to make sure she shows up for her date with you?

In this guide, I’ll lay out five (5) recommended steps for ensuring girls show up to their dates with you – plus two more optional steps you can take.

Follow the guide, and your “date show-up rate” will go higher than that of anyone else you know.

Approach girls flat or polite, and you’ll get flat, polite receptions. Want girls who are excited and eager to meet you? Then BE that way when you approach!

I was responding to a thread on the forum where forum member Arnav asked about how to keep cold approach conversations going beyond the first 30 seconds. He brought up difficulty dealing with girls he approached who only seemed neutral or polite.

Here’s a description of a similar phenomenon written by another forum member, RDRChaseMember:

So from my usual experiences with cold approach, they're usually I pay a compliment to her and try to open, and they walk away or don't stop to talk to me, fine. The other experience I get from it (though pretty rare) is that they do engage in a conversation with me enthusiastically, we're making long conversation, and I go for a number. Yet, when I follow up with them, I don't hear anything back from them.

It's almost as if I should expect general disinterest most of the time.

In one of my responses to Arnav (who wants to know how to keep cold approach conversation going beyond 30 seconds), I shared a secret to getting girls that veteran seducers all sooner or later figure out: that women reflect your mood right back at you, thanks to the power of emotional contagion. In other words, if you want a girl to respond a certain way to your approach, be that way on the approach.

Here’s what I told Arnav:

This is one of the magic tricks a good seducer has that regular guys don't: he can approach a girl and using nothing but his own expressiveness and her mirror neurons he can elicit what appears to be a high degree of interest from her right away. When I used to take guys out in-field and do demonstration approaches the guys would always comment after, "Wow, that girl was REALLY into you!" Sometimes she is, but sometimes she is just mirroring my approach, because that is what women do if you seem like a reasonably cool guy and you are being EXPRESSIVE. But get her to mirror you long enough and even the girls who weren't all that interested can start to wonder to themselves if maybe they are.

Today I’m going to let you in a little more on this secret of emotionally expressive approaches, that way you don’t have to wait until you’re 3 or 4 years deep in seduction before you puzzle this one out on your own (3-4 years in is right around when this one truly clicks for the average self-taught playboy).

When getting girls feels like a lot of work, you’re getting the ‘getting’ wrong. The secret is how much work you get HER to put in – not how much YOU do.

I keep hearing this same phrase and variations thereof chanted over and over by men across the Internet:

• “Getting girls is too much work!”

• “Women aren’t worth the effort!”

• “No woman is worth doing this!”

I see guys miming it all over social media anytime anyone talks about getting girls.

I see it parroted randomly on forums and article comment sections online.

It’s repeated so freely and easily, and repeated so verbatim, that it’s clear it’s a gut-level response, bleached deep into men’s psyches, that they’ve absorbed from the red pill Internet and internalized.

But if getting girls is a lot of work, I just have this to say to you, amigo:

The way you’re using to get them is the WRONG way!

The fact that you’re making an effort to look good, not gushing all over girls, and actually trying to be chill & interesting puts you head and shoulders over almost every other man.

This post by DoWhatWorks originally appeared on our forum here.

TLDR: If you're on this site, self-improvement focused and avoid doing stupid things around girls you'll stand out against 99% of guys.

You likely don't give yourself enough credit. Remember there are plenty of cool/attractive girls you can get by putting in numbers and this recent looks obsession/maxxing is an insecurity marketing tactic which if I'm honest I occasionally fall victim too. Goodlooking loser had a great post on this (“Hollywood Loves Your Inferiority Complex, Part 1”) back in the day.

The smart phone era has put us all into our heads. The result has been fewer women signaling men – and fewer men approaching women.

Taking a stroll down a leafy city sidewalk today I connected a few separate factors I hadn’t before connected. Men have had a lot of complaints recently about women not signaling them, even as women have complained about men not approaching them. Many of us in seduction have noticed that women’s signaling frequency has gone down compared to a decade+ ago.

People are more introverted, shier, with poorer social skills overall – and a lot less likely to be in what I call ‘social mode’.

I’ve talked before on Girls Chase about how you’re a lot more likely to elicit signals from women when you’re attuned to women and the environment around you. We’ve also talked about how to elicit approach invitations from women using attention grabs before. We’ve even talked about prompting women to approach you outright!

The dots I connected during today’s sidewalk stroll however connect all these factors into an overall social fabric that makes the ‘signal decline’ make a lot more sense.

Dating is rough for autistic men. Yet, approaching it methodically, focusing on building the right habits, their romantic challenges can be whittled down.

As the founder of the highest traffic men’s dating advice website in history, I’ve fielded comments, questions, and laments from men on the autism spectrum for decades.

I’ve seen many success stories among students of the game who are also on the spectrum. I also have a pretty firm grasp at this point of what the limitations are for such men.

If you’re new to Girls Chase and don’t know who I am, I am a ‘neurotypical’ dating & relationship expert whose stock in trade is breaking down complex social and romantic concepts into their essences. My approach is relentless practicality and understandability in what I teach; to take concepts I and other Don Juans understand at an intuitive level, and break them down them in simple terms accessible to beginners. Due to the nature of my insights and analyses, this site has proven popular with men on the autism spectrum over time.

That said, I realize there are a lot of trained specialists out there who work dedicatedly with men on the autistic spectrum.

I am not an ‘autism specialist’. If part of your requirement for accepting advice is that the advice giver come through an institutional credentialing program, close this page now and contact your nearest autism specialist for a consultation instead.

If, however, you’d like a pathway forward for you in dating, despite the struggles that come from being on the autism spectrum, read on.