14 Terrible Signs You're Deep in the Friend Zone

I don't think "fertile" is a very good descriptor of masculine sexuality, I'd use "virile" instead.

If you care about feedback from a woman, this is an EXCELLENT article and totally spot on. Especially your advice about what to -- get away from this situation. ASAP.

Men and women can be "just friends" really only if both people are happy with it staying that way. Pining away after someone who's not interested in taking it to the next level is just going to make you miserable, and waste your time and energy that could be spent on finding someone who totally would dig a guy like you.

Either she's a nice [but maybe clueless] woman who is uncomfortable with the thought of hurting your feelings, or she's a crazy bitch who enjoys stringing you along to boost her ego.The first could do without all the awkwardness, and the second one doesn't deserve your kindness.

Life is painful enough without hurting yourself. Let it go and you'll find your dream girl elsewhere sooner. Good luck, guys, she's out there.

My roommate introduced me to this girl about a year back and shes pretty shy.I started talking to her and hanging out with her but I never made a move. And then she started intiating contact after this one time where all we did was watch a movie in my room didnt really talk and then she left. Then i started going thru some personal problems and stopped talking to her for three months. Then one day my roommate has her over and i start texting her again but never invite her to hang out for about two months. Then I invite her over so I can cook dinner for her but when the day comes she cancels and says shes only interested in being friends. Then I say i understand and she says she still wants to chill with me though. So I stopped talking to her for two weeks and then I start texting her again. She seems pretty in to the conversations but when I tried to invite her over she says shes busy or if she can she let me know. The last two times she came over she texted my roommate to see if we could hangout. So I just told her how I felt and I want more than a friendship. She said she wants to work on herself and she doesnt want anything more than friends. and i havent talked to her since and she tried to chill to with my roommate and me the day after I told her but i never showed up. What should I do?

Hey Chase, great article.

I'm a junior in High School, and have had a crush on one girl since the beginning of 8th grade. She friend-zoned me in 8th grade, and again in 10th grade. We haven't spoken much since, but now that this year has started, she's really friendly any time she sees me. I am no good at picking up on signs of flirtation, but is it possible that since last school year things have changed, or am I just delusional?
She hasn't done any of the things you listed in this article, so I figure that's a good first sign. As much as it seems like a lost cause, she's just so great I really don't want to give up.
Also, she's never had a boyfriend or anything of the sort, making me feel like the door is still open.

Thanks so much.

While I haven't got to the last 7 (hell no... not possible). I've been hit with some of the first few. An eye opener for real.

You never want her as your wing woman, if she's heterosexual. Not only is she getting ready to bash you verbally, such as belittlement in public in front of people, she will make sure other women do the same, friend zone / cock block you.

Get as far away from this kind of woman as possible, cut contact and social media ties with her immediately. Learn from this event and move on.

Well, you're using the word "asexuality" incorrectly. That means that the person in question has no sexual attraction to anyone at anytime no matter what. It's not a choice but a lack of a sexual orientation that your born with.

There are, "gray asexuals" as well, only getting sexual arosal with a deep emotional bond, they're known as Grey A's or GRAYCEs, too.

Just had to put that out there, I know quite a few ACEs and GRAYCES, inside and outside the gender binary (men and women) as most people definite it as being.

Dont know if this is covered on girlschase.com Chase , but I got a coworker I adore .
So story goes I get hired 6 months ago thru a friend to help this company install sets in a home .
I start doing the work , and one of the girls( becky) there automatically is attracted to me . I play it off all day , and then by end of work day , I bag her.
We start sleeping together here and there. One day out of the blue at work another girl (jess) walks in the door of the house I am working on . She is someone I know from 2 years ago . Btw , I hooked up with her once back then . When I see her , shes surpised to see me , I am surprised also. She looks great . And I wanted her right away . Come to find out the becky is now her really good friend . As i figure this out , I completely stop sleeping with becky . And just tell her I want to focus on the job and actually keep my job because I had no idea these women work together and are friends also . So that dies out . As that dies out . I rekindle the friendship I have for jess . We start hanging out . Friends . Friendly . Then one day she texts "I'm going to columbia , you should join me ." I do go . We were friends out there. Of course till i pulled the moves right when I get there . And she tells me its not a good idea because I slept with her good friend and she lost a lot of respect for me . At this point im like well heck what do i do ? I end up staying longer in columbia and meeting women, doing my thing ,,etc etc . She even showcased some dudes she met . and I just played it off. NOw return to reality and I am at work with both girls still . NOt sleeping with either but when i came back from my trip everyone in the office notices that jess and i are very attracted to one another . We go out for drinks with everyone and were the ones talking together in the corner all alone always . She invites me over her house to fix up her place . I do . I get no love back though . She makes me dinner . Makes me lunch . Im not sleeping with her though . I am in the friendzone so bad . I dont no how to get out of it . Worst off , I cant completely cut contact cus i see her everyday at work . As I read these articles though ive stop texting . and hanging out . I guess my next move is when the attraction sets in again . Im striking hot ?? you tell me what to do ? and how to approach this please . Thanks for your time

Hello! Great post, it is really helpfull. I have a question about after checking out of friendzone, and I will tell you my case. I was into a girl about one and a half years ago. I talked to her a lot, everyday for about 4 months. And I told her that I actually like her and that I want to be more than friends with her (this was before reading any kind of advice about interactions with women). Of course, I didn't get anywhere with this. I kept talking briefly with her for some more weeks, and then realized that I'd better cut off the contact. I treated her like a normal co-worker, only that I didn't start any conversations with her and I was pretty distant. Since then, I have read lots of materials about interactions, seduction, non-verbal attraction, pretty much everything. It is a year since then. We haven't seen each other for 3 months, during the summer, and we never talked during this time. I met other girls, I practiced techniques and I was sure that I got out of friendzone (I surely have no problems like those described above). I still somehow like her, not as much of course, but enough for trying to get somewhere with her. Still, I get mixed signals. She looks at me and when I catch her eyes, she keeps the eye contact for 2-3 seconds and then she turns away, not laughing or anything, I bannter with her, it's fun, and she is responsive and non-verbally showing interest in me. But this is all. I am scared of a date or any kind of actual emotional contact, because I don't want to end up friendzoned. What do you think I should do? Or, what anyone should do in a situation like this?

Thank you in advance, and I really hope for an answer.

Hi Chase
I have kind of liked this girl (acquaintance) for quite sometime but I wasn’t emotionally available back then. After seeing her again at the party 10 days ago, I started sending her messages through a social network while hiding my true identity. I must have done quite a remarkable job at getting her attention then we met in person and she was kinda surprised knowing it was me.

Into a week of going out together, she keeps on saying not to kiss her but lets me kiss her on her lips anyway. She lets me hold and touch her, kiss her hand and such. We have not made out (yet). She calls and hangs with me wherever I choose to.

She works in a different city from where I am but stays with her boyfriend whenever she’s around. Yes, she has a boyfriend in the same city where I live. I just found it out after we've met.
She admits she likes me, cares for me and is happy with me but she is in a committed relationship. She has mentioned their relationship has been crappy though. I've recently decided not to communicate with her for awhile with a feeling that this was getting either nowhere or bad.

This all happened in 10 days, but I have liked her since 2013. I know, I don’t want this to happen to me too if I were the boyfriend… but

Is she really into me or is it just because I’m leading her on?
Is she in part now using me as to fill the void in their relationship?
Should I continue going out with her getting to know her more while knowing she would just simply go home to her boyfriend?
Or would it be proper if as early as now I'd ask if she’d be willing to take it further with me?
Or would I go telling her how much she means and give her space?
Should I stop communicating with her totally?
Please help me, I'm so confused...Thanks.

She tries to set you up with ugly friends? Really? What if the friends we try to set you up with aren't ugly to us? What if we like who they are in the inside and feel that they would make a good girlfriend for you? What if some of our attractive friends are more shallow than us, and we feel that they will look at you more cruelly? What if we feel that our friends are good for you regardless of what we look like? Women are not as shallow when it comes to dating as men are, men will only for like 90% of the time give a chance to the hot girl if he finds her physically attractive, but not to an ugly or average looking woman. Blame it on hormones I guess, but whenever a girl gives a chance to someone they feel physically attracted to, she gets yelled and an accused of being shallow. That is unfair, and now you are saying that the girl that "friend zoned" you is obligated to set you with someone just because you find that someone physically attractive?

I mean seriously, if you don't want to go out with that "ugly woman" she wants to set you up with, just say no. But don't accuse the girl you got "friend zoned" by as being unfeeling, just because she might actually think that some of her "unattractive friends" might be better for you. Are you really that callous to say such a thing? If you want to find someone more attractive then go find someone on your own time, but don't waste your friend's time. Your friend isn't a professional match maker, she is just trying for the most part to set you up with someone that she feels you have more personality traits with, if you are going to be an entitled jerk and say "only set me up with attractive people" then you are just shallow and full of yourself.

Oh by the way, love is more about personal and sexual attraction than physical attraction, if you go by mostly physical attraction, then you are going to lose. I don't care what your penis says, you aren't entitled to a beautiful woman, if that beautiful woman isn't attracted to you.