How to Escape a Woman's "Gotcha" Questions | Girls Chase

How to Escape a Woman's "Gotcha" Questions

Chase Amante

Hey! Chase Amante here.

You've read all the free articles I can offer you for this month.

If you'd like to read more, I've got to ask for your help keeping the lights on at Girls Chase.

Click a plan below to sign up now and get right back to reading. It's only 99¢ the first month.

Already a subscriber? Log in here.

gotcha question
Ever have a girl hit you with a "gotcha" question, at the worst possible moment? You had just asked her out, or to come home with you, or got to bed. Then – GOTCHA!

Under my article on women not counting men they've slept with, SZ asked:

"How do we not get into the settle down relationship thing ? A girl might admit she's a slut, but she'll say something like, "you have to promise me you'll stay with me if we have sex, you have to tell me you won't leave me, will you leave me? Will you be my boyfriend? Etc.""

These are what we call "gotcha" questions. Women will hit you with them when you least expect it, and are worst prepared for it. They're tests... aimed at you at the most inconvenient of moments.

Example "gotcha" questions include:

  • You're about to sleep with her, but she stops you to ask you if you'll be her boyfriend

  • You ask her out, and she says "okay", then says "Wait, what will we do on this date?"

  • You give her a drink, and she asks "You're not trying to get me drunk, are you?"

  • You invite her home with you, and she asks "Are you trying to have sex with me?"

  • You move to kiss her and she stops you to say "This is as far as we go, right?"

I'm sure you've seen other similar questions too.

These questions may be conscious traps. Or the girl may just find her in a suddenly uncertain situation, and want a little clarity from you.

Regardless her reason for asking though, the effect on you can often amount to "Geez, what do I say here?"

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his One Date System.



Lawliet's picture

Hey Chase,

Re: The dilemma of gotcha!

You're right, so many times when girls would think "I've got him now!" and then we fall behind and she has all the power.

But not taking action and hiding banana won't do us any good. Yet taking action and sticking necks out can easily have a "confirmation" and once she thinks she's got us figured out, then "gotcha!"

Re: Qualification questions

The cousin of gotcha questions, the ones you talked about how to answer over text when she sends screening questions.

Now deeper in thought about this, I have a hunch.
Recently, a common question is "How old are you?"
Thankfully being a student I have long relief on the "What job do you do?"

But the how old are you can already give her away that she likes us.
Another reference point to the IOI.

However, is it really something to be happy about?
Qualification questions she asks... on what situation would a girl ask these questions?

A lover who she sleeps with once or few times but may never see him again?
Or a boyfriend who she potentially may bring home to her parents?

The answer is obvious.
These questions indicate boyfriend zoned.

What do you think Chase? And any of your experiences on this?
Did you still manage to date and seal the deal in spite of these...?


Sebastian's picture

You're a fucking genius and that's all I gotta say. Genius.

SZ's picture

1. Chase, how does this sound ? "girl: why do you want to fuck/sleep with me so bad? Guy : I want to make love to you. Or, I'm not even thinking about that; I just want to keep kissing you/ on you."

How those sound?

2. With the are you a good girlfriend thing. What happens after that? Are you in the clear and can do as you please ? Like happens after you sleep with her after her qualifying herself as a good girlfriend?

3. With the last serious question, it's kind of hard for me to remember. Is there something shorter we could say ?

4. I'm trying to sleep with girls only one time now. I now understand why you don't do fwb, I can't believe it took me so long to see why you said it, but damn does it make so much sense.

Doing a fwb is a waste of time and can last way longer than you want.

Another dating coach actually like to keep girls around with a fwb relationship (a rotation) how do you feel about that ?

I'm more with your way if thinking with fuckin a girl once or twice because I like to be free to fuck other girls and don't want to deal with the same women.

4. How do we end the relationship after one lay or two after going through this song and dance ? I feel the woman would want you to be her man, especially since we are spitting such good game and are exceptional men.

I'm tryna smash n dash.


Add new comment

The Latest from