Articles by Author: Chase Amante | Girls Chase
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  2. Articles by Author: Chase Amante

Articles by Author: Chase Amante

Make a Girl Chase Until She’s Hooked, Ripe, and Ready

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By: Chase Amante

make a girl chaseSeveral caveats about this article:

  1. This is reasonably advanced game. Don’t do it just yet if you’re new

  2. This is not ‘all the time’ game. It should not be your staple or go-to method

  3. I don’t advise you use it with girls you’re really into; it probably won’t work

Okay, so, this is a way to make a girl chase I generally call “putting her on the hook.” It’s where she’s hooked, she wants to see you, she’s excited to see you, and then you just... leave her there.

But not too long. Not long enough for attraction to expire or escalation windows to close. Thus, why it’s fairly advanced: you must be able to gauge where she’s at emotionally to use this style.

Then, once she’s ‘ripe’, you reel her in for a very straightforward date where you don’t really need to do anything more than kick back, hang out, and hook up.

If that sounds pretty good to you, then read on.

When Talking to Girls, Make the Boring Exciting

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By: Chase Amante

There was a quite wonderful article in the New York Times the other day about the use of storytelling and narratives.

In the piece, “What Happens When Baseball-Stats Nerds Run a Pro Team?”, the authors reveal their discovery that simply conveying bare factual information ultimately proved less inspiring – despite its accuracy – and that when they began to spin a narrative around the reasons for their actions, players took this more to heart, put their emotions into the game, and started winning.

There’s a great parallel here with talking to girls, too: because if all you’re doing is conveying facts, you’ll struggle to get buy-in, pleasure, excitement, and attention... even if your facts are the best facts in the business.

As you know all too well if you read this site regularly, emotions are a woman’s bread and butter: she doesn’t want to know your details.

She wants to feel something. Facts don’t do this for her. Stories do.

talking to girls

If you can make her feel those up and down emotions, that thrill, and that excitement, she is as good as yours.

Why People Settle Down: The 3-Step Settling Curve

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By: Chase Amante

I recently was privy to a conversation between a handful of women in their early- to mid-thirties. They were for the most part quite attractive and confident, and their careers were solid and their paychecks healthy. The conversation went something like this:

Girl 1: I’m someone who thought she’d always be single her entire life and never get married. But I had to take care of my aging mother when my father was in the hospital, and I realized someday that will be me and it might really be nice to have someone around to look after me when I’m like that.

Girl 2: I never thought I’d want to get married either. I’m still not sure if marriage is what I want, but as I get older I think more and more it’d be nice to have a companion.

settle down

Girl 1: Exactly. But I’d never settle! I’d only get married if someone was truly the right match for me.

Girl 3: You should never accept someone who isn’t the right match for you. The right person will come along sooner or later; you just have to have the patience to wait for him.

Girl 2: That’s a beautiful way to put it.

Girl 1: Totally right.

You may hear something like this and think, “For a group of smart, educated, professionally successful women, they sure don’t seem to be able to think or communicate about love in any way that doesn’t rely on romcom tropes and tired clichés.”

And, you’d be right.

However, before you judge these gals silly for the naïveté of their talking points, I’d caution you to be aware that this is a common trap people fall into in societies that abandon educating their youths on life history... and men fall into it every bit as much as women.

Quit Letting Girls Off the Hook So Much

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By: Chase Amante

I’ve seen a sickness in men, and it is chucking out validation like bread at the duck pond.

Here, I’ll show you what I mean.

Let’s say you compliment a girl, and she refuses it. Like so:

You: Your hair is spectacular.

Her: Oh, actually I haven’t even combed it today, haha.

What do you say next?

If you’re like most guys, you let girls off the hook with something along the lines of:

You: Well you can’t even tell. It looks awesome.

letting girls off the hook

Or, let’s say you text a girl, ask her out, yet she declines (in a nice way). Like:

You: Andie, let’s go to this wine tasting they’re having Thursday night!

Her: Oh no, I sooo want to go, but my parents are in town this week! I have to spend time with them!

How do you respond? If you’re like most guys, it’s something like:

You: Oh man, well, I’ll miss you, but have fun with your parents!

Do you sense anything slightly wrong with these responses?

Is there an almost indecipherable air of excess ‘niceness’ in them?

That excess niceness you’re picking up on is validation – and letting her off the hook.

Girls in Groups: How to Tell Who’s a Leader or a Follower

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By: Chase Amante

When you’re approaching girls in groups, one of the most vital tasks you have ahead of you is to quickly ferret out who is the leader of the group, and who are the followers.

girls in groups

If you can tell who the leader is, you know how to proceed with courting the girl you like. If you don’t know who the leader is, it’s easy to mess this up, have all the girls bail on you, and end up standing around wondering what the heck happened.

You’ll tend to develop a natural instinct for discerning the group leader from the other girls in the group as you gain more exposure, so if you’re a veteran of bar/club game or social circle pickup, you’ll probably find you intuitively know which girls the leaders are soon into an interaction (or even before you say hello).

So if that’s you, this article may be a little basic for you... though I’d encourage you to tune in for the later two installments in this 3-part series, which will focus on picking up followers (one article) and picking up leaders (another article), for some important process distinctions.

If you’re just beginning to dip your toes into meeting women in non-solo situations (e.g., she’s not some girl you’ve approached on the street all by her lonesome), this guide will be just the thing to help you understand who’s who in the girl groups you meet.

Why to Never Take What Women Say at Face Value

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By: Chase Amante

what women sayA few hours ago I was in a girlfriend’s apartment with her and some of my girlfriend’s friends. I showered there, and when I finished my shower I left the bathroom in just a towel, then returned to dry my hair.

After my girlfriend’s friends had left, she told me one of her friends had seen me walking back and forth wrapped in my towel and proceeded to make an unpleasant face, then look away.

Now, if I was younger I might’ve been inclined to take this reaction at face value and assume there must be something wrong with my body, or maybe I don’t look that good in a towel and ought to stay covered up all the time. I’d feel self-conscious and take something like this as reason for doubt.

However, at this point, I know I’m in decent shape... I have some muscle, and little fat. I have arguably the best figure right now I’ve ever had. And I’ve had plenty of girls tell me I have a good body. So I know that “Ugh!” reaction likely doesn’t mean, “Ew, he’s so ugly.”

Instead, I figured this likely happened because that friend is devoutly religious, and her reaction was her forbidding herself to suffer impure thoughts / temptation. I told my girlfriend this, and she said that was her read as well (then asked me if I could stay dressed around her more conservative friends).

It seemed like a simple little interaction, but it highlighted an important point:

You must be careful not to take what women say or do at face value.

Girls Chase Podcast Interviews Ep. 11: Chase Amante

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By: Chase Amante

In this podcast – the first of a two-parter – Varoon and I talk relationships: starting them, setting expectations properly, converting girls from new lays to regular partners, and the different relationship structures you can set up with women.

A selection of topics Varoon and I discuss:

7 Rules on How to Be the Alpha Provider

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By: Chase Amante

how to be an alpha providerLast week, I tackled the common pickup / manosphere belief that the ‘alpha provider’ is a myth: both why men in these communities often think this way, as well as why men who actually are alpha providers don’t usually find their ways into such communities to bother providing themselves as counterexamples to the claims of their non-existence.

Today we dive into the ‘how to’ side of things.

How do you avoid the gradual erosion of authority in a long-term relationship with a woman, and instead retain her attraction, respect, and deference?

How do you continue to be the lover, even when you assume the role of provider as well?

I’ve broken it down here into seven (7) rules: four of them external/behavior based, and three of them internal/mentality based.

We’ll start with behavior, and move to mentalities.

Here we go.

Tactics Tuesdays: The Friend Zone Date

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By: Chase Amante

friend zone date

Sometimes you’re out and about and you meet a girl and take a number from her.

And for whatever reason, she isn’t all that attracted to you.

Yet for whatever reason, she still gives you her phone number.

And then for whatever reason, she agrees to meet up with you.

But you can sense this one is going through the motions.

It might not quite be the friend zone yet, but it’s pretty darn close. And she doesn’t even know you.

So what do you do... just meet up with her anyway and hope you can change her mind?

Well, you CAN do that... but if you don’t have a game plan for it, it’s like opting for a few games of Black Jack when you don’t really understand how to play Black Jack.

There’s some chance you walk away with winnings, but most of the time you’re only going to waste your time, probably going to waste your money, and if your ego’s wrapped up in it you may well take a self-esteem hit too.

So let’s set out some strategy for those “friend zone” dates, and talk:

  • Prevention,
  • Treatment, and
  • Cure

Old Fashioned Sex Symbols vs. Modern Male Stars: What’s the Difference?

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By: Chase Amante

male sex symbols

I previously said (in this post) my next article would be “How to Be an Alpha Provider”... however, I’m going to switch things up today. Today’s article is about sex symbols: those of the past and those of today. And we’ll get back to the alpha providers again next week. Onwards, then.

Today’s article comes in response to a question from Byron on my article about self-cultivation regarding my preference for older male sex symbols over the more current ones Hollywood has to offer. Here’s what Byron had to say:

“Hey,
I’ve recently come across several comments where you reference Sean Connery and Harrison ford as the epitome of raw sexiness. I was wondering if you could elaborate on this and why not the plethora of modern sex symbols, ie what makes them so different? Or if you could write an article on their appeal or a series on famous seducers/ role models I think that would be very interesting and relevant. Again just suggestions, I realize you are very busy. Thank you for this site!”

That’s a fantastic question. Why do I recommend the older guys more than the newer guys? I had a few reasons, but part of me kind of wondered if maybe I just had some kind of nostalgia-bias when this subject’s come up in the past... maybe I’m simply guilty of thinking older is better.

Fortunately, this article’s forced me to really get down to nuts and bolts, and in the process of writing it, I learned a lot. Let’s dive in.

Think about your old school, old fashioned male sex symbols. Men like:

  • Gary Cooper
  • Cary Grant
  • James Garner
  • Sean Connery
  • James Dean
  • Harrison Ford

Compare them to the sex symbols of modern cinema. Men like:

  • Brad Pitt
  • Ryan Gosling
  • George Clooney
  • Ian Somerhalder

Do you notice anything?

I like all the guys in both of these lists. All are masters of their crafts, and there are buckets you can learn from watching the facial expressions, body language, and little nonverbal tics of each, as well as studying the way each man uses his voice and his overall demeanor.

However, there’s a clear difference between these two groups of men (that span about two generations each)... a large enough difference that while I personally suggest you take the time to study all of these men, when it comes to my own preferences, the only ones I ever find myself wanting to model outright are the ones from before.

And I sat down today and the one question on my mind was, “How do I best explain this difference?”