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(3) Journeyman

Journeyman have been at it a while and have begun to develop major good habits and success streaks as practitioners of the social arts

Congruence, Psychology, and Taking a Girl Home 5 Minutes After Hello

Guest Contributor's picture

By: Guest Contributor

congruence psychology
Congruence is a term in psychology that refers to a state where your self and your behavior align. This leads to crazy success in dating.

How many “techniques” have guys ever used to get women?

Some guys take a very smooth, suave approach – a little James Bond mixed with Danny Ocean.

Others take a “Van Wilder” approach and try to amp up a girl’s emotions, making her have so much fun that her logical, self-judging mind turns off, and sex just happens.

Others, me included, like to take a “gorilla game” approach, and just approach every girl as decisively and directly as possible, initiating physical contact as early as is appropriate.

There are a ton of different strategies when it comes to getting girls, and those are just a few. But which one is the best? Some would argue the merits of push-pull game, others claim that providing a witty and charming conversation takes the cake, while others insist that confidence is key. What I would say is this: these are all very good approaches to getting women, and they all have their merits. Some strategies will work better than others – depending on the situation.

If you’re at that posh new nightclub in LA, or at Surrender in Las Vegas for your yearly bachelor’s trip, using “James Bond” game might not be the best idea. If you’re at a high-end business networking meeting, emulating “Van Wilder” might network your ass right to the curb. But regardless of the location and style of game you prefer, there is one underlying principle that is more important than ANY strategy or technique.

That principle, of course, is congruence.

The 4 Stages of Every Friends with Benefits Relationship

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

content="Every friend with benefits relationship goes through 4 distinct stages: fun, relaxed, restless, and decision. Here’s what each entails.">

In Colt's piece on female intrasex competition, several commenters asked about the problem of getting a girl into a casual relationship, and keeping her there. To quote Sam, one of the commenters there:

“Very few of them were ok with a strict lover arrangement. All others wanted more than that and whenever I had the nerve to show or say to them that I was not into more than a lover arrangement I simply lost the girl either because she would cut me off or because I would not further pursue her.”

The problem, of course, is that "friends with benefits" is not an end goal for most women. That is to say, a casual sexual relationship - where you are a lover and nothing more - just ain't enough.

friend with benefits relationship

You can maintain casual relationships for varying lengths of time, depending on a number of factors, mainly having to do with the stage in her life a girl is at, and your value relative to hers in the relationship. We'll talk more about both of these below.

But the main gist of this article will focus on the four (4) stages that every friends with benefits relationship must follow:

  1. The Fun Stage
  2. The Relaxed Stage
  3. The Restless Stage
  4. The Decision Stage

... and the varying details on each.

Tapping Your Social Circle to Meet Loads More Girls

Peter Fontes's picture

By: Peter Fontes

'Allo there, readers.

This is to be the final entry in my social circle series. In case you missed the previous ones in the series, you can view them each here:

In our final edition of this series, we'll take a tour deep into the art of tapping your extended social circle - that is to say, branching out of your existing social circle and working with what you've already got going on socially to meet new women.

social circle meet girls

This piece will be of particular interest to the guys with social circles low on attractive, single females. By the end of this one, we'll be using the social circles you already have to meet more attractive, single females... even if you couldn't tell me at the start of it where those attractive, single females might be.

We will, then, socially speaking anyhow, be turning lead into gold.

Using Day Game to Get Girls: 14 Myths Debunked

Ricardus Domino's picture

By: Ricardus Domino

day gameLet me tell you something that might shock you…

Going to bars and clubs can actually PREVENT you from getting the girls you want!

When I first started approaching women almost a decade ago now, I always went straight to the bars and clubs... and I always went with one or more friends.

It seems to make sense, right?

Lots of single women make themselves look pretty and go there to flirt... people have free time, alcohol serves as a social lubricant and everybody is having fun, listening to music and being social.

Well... all that is true, and so for most men who want to meet a girl, bars and clubs are the INTUITIVE choice. But, as we know, most things in dating science are COUNTERINTUITIVE.

And while I do still go to clubs and bars with friends sometimes to have a good time and maybe a flirt, I prefer to meet women during the day now, and when I'm alone.

This article is about day game - about approaching women during the day - and the advantages that has over "night game". That doesn't mean that any of what you are about to read in this article is the gospel. The night definitely has its perks as well - but let me play devil's advocate here and lay out a bit of a different perspective for you.

I deliberately wrote this in a controversial way to think outside the box a bit, and while some of the following "myths" are actually valid some of the time, one thing is always true:

The more we question things we've believed for a long time... the more we realize that the opposite of a profound truth is often also a profound truth.