What Causes Girl Fights and Female Competition? | Girls Chase

What Causes Girl Fights and Female Competition?

The prospect of a girl fight holds a very special place in the minds of most men. We believe that if you voluptuous vixens start going at it, eventually their angry passion will be converted into sexual energy and they will start to make out, and even invite in a nearby man for a threesome.

But as most men who are in the know are aware of: this is very far from the truth. In fact, even if two women are fighting over a guy, the fight itself isn’t really about him. Rather, it’s about their instincts, and enacting the desire to snuff out competition in every way possible.

girl fight

That’s what every form of female competition comes down to: protecting pride and destroying the competition. And today I’m going to delve deeply into the concept of female competition: where it comes from, how it plays out, and much more importantly…how you fit in.

Colt WilliamsAbout the Author: Colt Williams

Raised in the American Midwest, Colt Williams made a name for himself in dating with a style based on soulful poetic seductions and playful dance floor antics. His style is all about inspiring girls and drawing them into one’s world. You can book phone coaching with him here, or get a copy of his guide to getting laid on Tinder, the product of months of study and experimentation by him on the medium.


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Sam2's picture

Colt, this is a good and targeted article.

I have a question which troubles me in my game with women. My skill with women by the way, according to the skill test of Girls Chase, is a Technician.

I realised that in practice it is very hard for me to use the lover-provider distinction for my own benefit. Why is that? Because the great majority of women I have interacted with so far seem to want a fusion of the two roles into one. They want a package deal. Lover AND boyfriend.

Very few of them were ok with a strict lover arrangement. All others wanted more than that and whenever I had the nerve to show or say to them that I was not into more than a lover arrangement I simply lost the girl either because she would cut me off or because I would not further pursue her.

Could it be that in real life women expect a fusion of the the two roles? Could it be that women go for only sex under very specific circumstances (e.g. holidays, travel abroad, or during ovulation period)?

jack's picture

I have similar sentiments. I am curious as to what Chase's (or other bloggers) response to this will be. In other words, I find that *retention* of quick lays is harder. Its difficult for me to keep a stable of casual only girls. I think retention of fbs/mltrs would be a good topic for a post even though Ricardus advocates his version of harem keeping, a version that I find near impossible to do.

Anonymous's picture

"The realm of women is the ultimate contest of keeping up with the Joneses. If you understand that most of the things that women do are in fact to gain or tear down the esteem of other women, it will become a lot easier for you to navigate this murky world."

Why? Even if you're a lover, friend, or boyfriend, eventually a woman's real-side comes out. Even if you adroitly try to steer conversation away from the female-to-female drama, some girls become consumed by the inter-female competition. Personally, I find it amusing and sometimes annoying when some people find the need to incessantly compete with one-another, to FEEL good about themselves. To feel as if they can keep up with the Joneses then they should have "higher self-esteem." Problem with this focus is that your self-esteem is volatile. When another woman out-competes you, how ridiculous do you feel about yourself? On some level you feel shame which then turns to anger.

If you've ever had to deal with one of these girls, you get to see the the voracity of some of their frequent mood swings. All you want to do is get away from the drama, especially when you could care less and you seek a zen state of mind.

Nuncle's picture

"You’ll never hear a guy yelling at his friend not to sleep with a hot girl “because she’s a slut.”

Well occassionally, if the guy is envious and doesn't want his friend to get laid if he doesn't. A "friend" of mine once tried to stop me talking to a girl, who had approached me, on the grounds that "she's just using you" (?)

Anonymous's picture

Nice piece.

You're right to say that American women seem to want to prove that they hold the most valuable, sought-after prize. That to them it's kind of like keeping up with the Joneses. This is why I've noticed in America that it's so much easier to pick up girls in certain venues when you have a wingwoman or if you can take advantage of preselection by making a woman swoon at a club. Girls seem to strategically position themselves close to those guys who can make other attractive women swoon. When I first realized this, it was a very interesting phenomenon to me because under ordinary circumstances, I personally wouldn't try to steal some girl away from another dude. Unless she was a RARE RARE girl and I just had to have her for myself. Either I have her or no one does! But even then I'd have to force myself to go compete with some other dude. And the competition wouldn't be about beating the other dude, it'd be about the object of desire. Guess women don't think like I do! Surprise.

But it's indeed kind of pathetic to see the strong influence of the "specialness epidemic" on the wider population and how it kinda makes women feel ENTITLED to having the best man around (when some of them are relatively lame in how they treat men nor are they as 'special' as more confident ambitious sensual women that exist outside America). That being said, alot of girls still are pretty harmless.

One strategy I've been playing around with is to show women in subtle ways that I don't think they're the MOST special human being on the planet, but I still see something in them that I think is sorta cool. Validate them a little, without being floored by their existence. If she's an artist, compare her to Picasso. If she's a model compare her to the best one in the field. If she's a lawyer compare her to Sonya Sotomayor. That kinda puts things in perspective that you appreciate her ambition, but that you have enough know-how about her field (which is impressive in itself) that there are better fish in the sea out there. You like, but you're not overly impressed!

Traveling around the world and experience other cultures help understand other mindsets. Some areas value the community over individualism and they tend to a bit more on the humble side and easier to connect with -- since they're usually not all that worried about you acting like you're superior to them.

But what I've learned with some ambitious girls like the doctor/lawyer/engineer types) is that if you can persist thru a their armor of "specialness" and you can get access to the real woman inside, eventually many of them grow to prefer your personality (charms, charisma, conversational ability, dominance/leadership, and sexiness) over competition with both their senses-of-self and with other women. They begin to FEEL. And the feelings they crave are more special to them than competition with other women.

But you have to get them to feel, you have to get them to really open up and respond to your deep-diving and for you to challenge them and make them exit their autopilot of superiority. Basically treat them in the ways you guys preach about in very delicious detail on this site. Those esoteric articles you linked to are excellent because it's just good to have an understanding behind WHY the things you guys preach are important and to know exactly how our behaviors influence women's behavior in turn. And it's good to know why we need to do the things you guys recommend to interrupt the POWER of social/cultural influence here in America, and still navigate thru the world of women nearly as we see fit. Nearly like Neo in the matrix.

So I send my thanks to you and to the girlschase team!

Tajul 's picture

Well, I m deeply impressed by this article. Previously, I only thought that what d other women want to get, is d most deserved thing & when competition arises among d women, then it becomes so easy to pick up a woman..I had also had a proof regarding this..once I wanted to form a relationship with a girl but she didnt show any interest on me..but when one of her friends showed interest one me, then suddenly the girl whom I wanted, became so much interested on me & we had a relationship...so, women competition or women positive comments on a specific guy, it becomes so much important...I also like the old Saying mentioned in dis article "Women undress for me, dress for women". This is obviously true. Thnx d writer for d presenting this article.

Dale's picture

While the roles are conceptually seperate, there is no reason a man could not fulfill more than one. In particular, if the provider finds out someone else is the lover, the woman risks losing the provisions, so she would like to find a lover who is also willing to be the provider. (If he is also a upporter, that would be good, too.)

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