(3) Journeyman

How much does it cost to live a life that consistently brings you top shelf girls? Not as much as you might expect.

We had a forum thread recently where a member was asking how much money you'd realistically need to sleep with a lot of top shelf, high quality girls.

I assume what he meant was rich girls, successful girls, good-looking girls with lots of options, etc.

He listed out a bunch of things he thought you'd need in order to consistently get girls like this, such as:

• Dining out costs
• Gym costs and supplements
• Transportation costs
• Downtown apartment costs

... and so on.

I went through and did the math on it for him and came back with a minimum Spartan total of $780/mo to pay for housing, food, transport, and other things to live in a big Western metropolis with no amenities to consistently lay top shelf women.

However, I suggested he probably try to aim for at least $1500/month in income so he wasn't having to go super Spartan.

One forum member came back to note that he agreed with me on everything but what I put for housing; $400/mo (my 'housing on the outskirts of the city' low-end estimate) would only get you the tiniest, seediest room in a big city, he said.

But that's what I'm talking about: I've lived in a $300/mo tiny room (so tiny I had to get rid of most of my belongings before I moved in... coming from a larger apartment I could more easily afford, back when I was gainfully employed) in a house in the bad part of town with a roommate who left little, tiny hairs all over the bathroom every day (I could never figure out where all the hairs were coming from, or why they were there, DAILY. The man had a major shedding problem).

I had to clean up that hairy bathroom every time I had a girl coming over because I didn't want her to puke going in there. The roommate would never clean it up. (the other roommate was cool, but he didn't use that bathroom)

BUT, I also kept that dirty roommate up very late at night listening to the moans and yells of the chicks I brought back home, so I guess it evened out. The walls there were very thin.

I've been the guy picking up top shelf girls to shag in a dingy, tiny room in the bad part of town.

I've had other friends who've been that guy too.

It never ceases to amaze me though at how many guys think you NEED a bunch of money to get a bunch of top quality girls.

Because you don't.

Over the years there has been much discussion of indirect vs. direct game, going for women who are very interested in you vs. women who are only moderately interested in you vs. women who aren't at all interested in you, debates over which women are distractions and time wasters and which aren't, and related other topics.

Underlying all these discussions are various men's assumptions about the workings of feminine interest, alongside each man's preference for the type of feminine interest he pursues and the way he likes to pursue it.

By 'feminine interest', we mean:

1. What a girl wants
2. How much she wants it
3. How directly and aggressively (vs. not) you can pursue that with her

Today I want to give you an easy way to think about feminine interest, that will help to resolve the various disputes between methods, and also give you a new and helpful way to think about the women you set your sights on.

Some guys say looks are all that (or most of what) matters when it comes attracting women. This article uses mountains of photographic evidence to bury that theory forever.

Every time we talk about looks on Girls Chase, we get some guys in the comments or on the forum who get upset and tell us we're totally delusional and looks are the central thing.

These are the types I consider 'looks purists' and/or 'looks absolutists'. This site is one of the few in the seduction niche that is out there saying, "Looks are important, and it should be one of your priorities to work on yours," yet these guys still show up to tell us our focus is still not heavily enough on looks, and/or that it is pointless to try to work on looks because the only thing women pay attention to are your genetic facial traits.

I can tell you as a guy who has enjoyed success in a number of different fields that getting too obsessed with one particular aspect of success and putting it on a pedestal and making it absolute and pushing for pureness is a certain way to failure in that field.

With all things, dating included, you must have balance in your approach if you want success.

(honestly I'm somewhat befuddled why the hardcore looks guys read Girls Chase. You'd think they'd be busy doing facial training exercises or reading about who are the best plastic surgeons or something)

We've had plenty of articles very clearly disproving the 'looks are the main thing!' reductionist perspective of attraction. I'll link them in a moment if you want to go through them.

However, today, I want to conduct a fun experiment with you, that will be enjoyable for most people, meanwhile causing looks-are-everything acolytes to implode in a pile of cognitively dissonant goo.

Are you tuned out while out? If you notice a beautiful woman, is it a surprise you were unprepared for? Here's how to tune IN (in 5 simple steps).

In my article on scouting for 'meet girls' spots, a reader named Kevin comments

Hey Chase,

From the articles such as this one where you talk about your observations of other people when you're out on the street, I'm always struck by how aware and tuned-in you are to other people. Myself, for various reasons, I got into the habit of being totally in my head and tuned-out whenever I'm out on the street; I'm also very eye-contact averse, with everybody. I don't look, or I break off immediately. The only exception to those would be when I take very long walks or do day game sessions. And since those feel so much better because I'm really tuned-in, this ability to really absorb your environment and be totally present in it is one I very much want to automate. My question is about your eye-contact. Do you shamelessly observe everybody around you, holding eye-contact with anyone who gives it to you? Do you use the overhead eye-contact tactic from the 'Elite EC' article where you only look at people who look at you? Could you please give me some tips on how to emulate your own tuned-inness to the people around you when out on the streets? Somehow, probably because of social control, I'm really shy about just looking at people and observing them shamelessly!

Many thanks in advance,
Kev

It's a good topic for discussion. Attunement can be a fleeting thing. It's also by no means assured just because, for instance, you went out to approach women.

I observed in that article that the vast majority of people you pass by in life are tuned out. They're lost in their thoughts, thinking about what they need to do that day, absorbed in messages or notifications on their phones -- their heads are anywhere but present.

The attuned man enjoys some distinctive benefits. One is that women notice him much more. Attuned people are in it; they gaze around, their eyes are wider, they're noticeably taking in their environment. Attuned people look for other attuned people, and a woman who's attuned will tend to very quickly notice an attuned man (and you'll notice her). Which women are most likely to be attuned? Those who have a reason to pay attention. Much of the time this means women who are looking to meet someone.

Attuned men are also more risk-aware and better able to present as hard targets to avoid dangerous situations. Very useful if you live in dangerous places (or venture into them from time to time).

There's only one challenge: how do you tune yourself in?

Because for most people, being tuned in is merely a thing that happens to them, on rare occasions, when the mood strikes, or when they chance into the right state.

But that doesn't have to be the case for you.

You can attune yourself directly and consciously, if you know how.

Thread slicing is a conversation technique that keeps women intrigued and invested in a conversation with you. It’s also useful with fractionation and creating anchors.

Hey guys, and welcome back. Today I will share a conversation management technique I use that will add more control over your interactions.

Do you struggle with running out of things to say? Or keeping your conversations fresh and exciting throughout the interaction?

Maybe you have experienced state crash and would love to know another technique to deal with it?

If you answer yes to at least one of those questions, this post is for you.

Today we’ll cover thread slicing (not to be confused with thread cutting). It’s a simple yet efficient technique to use in any interaction, no matter where you are. This technique is not particularly advanced or hard to understand and not difficult to pull off.

This post is suited for beginners and intermediates since they will get the most benefit. However, it may be useful for more advanced players, though they most likely do this technique unconsciously. Becoming aware of what they do correctly may help them fine-tune their skills and use it more often and more consciously.

Many guys who learn pickup and seduction struggle with the morality of living a hedonistic lifestyle. This is a legitimate dilemma, so let’s get philosophical.

Hey guys. Welcome back. Today I will take a step away from the technical posts and share more of a reflection.

Over the years, I've seen that the philosophy of picking up women and seduction is closely related to hedonism. Both defenders and critics have used the hedonist argument to both praise and criticize pickup.

Pickup is viewed as hedonistic because the element of pleasure, or more importantly, short-term sensual pleasure is central. Some, including our own Hector Castillo, have presented some solid analysis on the main blog and the forum.

I would like to give you my take on the subject. Honestly, I doubt my opinion will differ much from Hector’s, but I may add some different perspectives.

Some questions we will try to answer are:

• What is hedonism?

• Is hedonism harmful?

• What about higher pursuits?

Whether or not you agree with my points is irrelevant. The purpose of this post is to offer another perspective that may help you evaluate your values and perhaps even challenge your ethical system so that you may come out stronger.

You’re in a club. A girl walks by and grabs your ass. Then she bolts and won’t talk to you. WTF? She’s an attention seeking freak, and here’s how to get her in bed.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Today I’ll respond to a question guys have asked on the forum. I assumed other men would enjoy having this question answered, too.

The question is: How do we deal with freaks in clubs?

Freakiness tends to be amped up to 11 in night club scenarios. Some of you may not be familiar with the term “freak.” It was coined by a deceased seducer called PlayerSupreme (RIP). According to him, there are three types of women:

1. Good girls (nice, kind, affectionate girls); however, HE NEVER claimed that those girls were asexual Madonnas

2. Hoes (the gold digger and status seeker)

3. Freaks (weird girls who use their sexuality to gain power and get male attention; they tend to have higher sex drives than other women, but not always)

So, today’s discussion will be about how to deal with the third type of woman. For a better idea of what we are discussing, here’s an example.

Say you are at a club having fun. Out of the blue comes this girl who tells you something sexually explicit, acts in a sexually explicit way, or touches you in a sexually explicit way.

She may tell you how much she likes sucking dick, or perhaps she simply comes up to you, grinds her ass on you, or even touches your dick.

And you, happy as a clam, believe she is doing this because she is:

• Super horny (easy prey)

• Very sexually open, one of those “sexual women” (I have discussed this topic many times; this is usually a bias; those who seem most sexually open are not necessarily those who are)

• Really into you

Pleased and excited, you reciprocate her move. You start showing sexual interest in return. You may touch her or make an overt move.

Only to realize that the moment you do, she walks away.

When you try to re-engage, she turns cold or starts ignoring you. It is frustrating. What the heck just happened? (I'll answer this in a bit.)

Even worse, you realize she’s now flirting with another guy, probably doing the same thing she did to you.

“But she was such easy prey; she showed so much interest in me.” You are a bit dumbfounded and creeped out.

The truth is, you have been played. And I will tell you how and why.