(1) Beginner

Gorgeous women are harangued by clueless, needy guys since the day they blossom. That’s why they bolt at the first sign of neediness… and chase the men who “get it.”

Every woman has an ex-boyfriend who lost his mind.

The media is ripe with crimes of passion, where men transform from lovers to stalkers, or from loyal boyfriends to controlling, jealous, domineering abusers.

They ruin it for all of us.

I used to be a very needy, weak man. Wet toast. Not the alpha-god of charisma that I am today. Even though I was incredibly insecure in grade 7, I still managed to score my first “girlfriend.” It lasted a whole week!

Her name was Despi. A beautiful, rich, Greek girl from another school. Being an introverted kid, I was shocked that she wanted me to call her. A girl likes… me?

“Despi likes Tony!?” they cried. It was my induction into the upper echelons of popularity, social proofed by a girl I didn’t even know yet. Suddenly, kids invited me to parties, sports games, and sleepovers. I was part of a different game now. An adult game without a rule book.

The first night of our short affair, I sat by the telephone, petrified, but I mustered the courage to call her. It went fine, and we agreed to go to a movie. Some nineties romantic comedy.

At the film, I sat there in a state of confusion, pumped with dopamine and adrenaline, wondering what the hell I was supposed to do. I wanted to hold her hand. Can you do that? Just pick it up? Squeeze it and play with its softness? Does she like Metallica? Nintendo? Should I ask?

We didn’t meet again after that.

Fast-forward to grade 8.

We all know that communicating emotion is a critical element in attracting women. But how does one make her “feel” in the 2-dimensional world of texting?

Texting fundamentals – I’ve wanted to talk about this for a while now.

Texting has many layers we can explore in a scholastic fashion. This will be a nerdy article for some, but it needs to be technical, or the advice won’t be as helpful as it could be.

Let’s start with emojis.

To understand how and why emojis work, let’s go through a few basic concepts of text game.

When we jump the gun and learn specialized aspects of a new skill before getting a solid foundation, the skill can become imbalanced and riddled with holes.

I recently took a short hiatus from seduction to reflect upon its deeper nature.

During that time, I got into boxing, and I have been observing seduction in as much detail as I can to try to reach a new level of understanding. In doing so, I’ve realized something about getting good with women – or anything, for that matter. It relates to how and where we apply our effort and how to get the best possible results without wasting time and energy.

With boxing, I have spent the past year ensuring that every aspect of what I do inside the ring is 100% technically accurate. If I discovered a single flaw, I used drills, exercise, and good old-fashioned hard work to fix it. I lost weight, removed the rust I had accumulated, and changed my foundation as a boxer from head to toe. I worked on my footwork, guard, head movement, hand speed, jab, combinations, counters, and overall conditioning.

It was tough, but I’ve started turning heads as my technical skill has become more apparent. I am entering a new phase where technical ability is non-negotiable. I am capable of all the things that make a decent boxer. However, I realize this is not the end of the road.

To progress further, I have had to let go of ideas of what might be good enough to beat most fighters and start thinking about what is good enough to win against a specific opponent. I’ve made the shift from “good enough” to genuinely commanding my fate.

This is something that is true in seduction as well. At first, we must gain enough ability that it is no longer a case of if we can get a girl, but when. We do so by acquiring universal strengths, traits, and attributes that help us achieve that level of confidence.

After this goal is attained, we then face a tough period where we question what we want, and on the other side of that soul searching is a whole new phase of learning.

To reach the top level of the most socially successful men, you have to hustle harder than almost anybody else.

Guys arrive at Girls Chase with all sorts of different ambitions.

Many guys just want a girlfriend. Some want to lose their virginities, or break a long dry spell. Others are fresh out of a marriage, bouncing back from divorce.

I don't talk about going for really outsize results a lot... because most guys don't really want to be one of the 10 coolest guys in town, or pile up 120 lays. Even if a guy starts out with "That's what I want!" usually past a certain point he realizes actually, he's happy where he ended up: some cool friends, a decent number of notches, a hot & caring girlfriend.

Usually I assume that, beyond that, if a guy is serious about stupidly, ridiculously outsize results -- like, being in the top of the top of men out there -- he'll realize, naturally, that he has to hustle his ass off for a protracted time to get there.

But it occurs to me now that perhaps not everybody does realize that.

One of the confusing things for me over the years has been guys who comment on Girls Chase regularly and talk about the outsize results they want but don't show outsize hustle in pursuit of those results.

While it's true the material on GC will speed and ease your journey, it's a bit like having an expert guide on a mountain climb. The guide will help (a lot!)... but you still have to climb the mountain.

There are no helicopter rides to the top of Mount Everest. Helicopters mostly can't even go that high (they can't usually generate enough lift). If you want to get there, you must train on lesser mountains, you must train rigorously; you must get a good guide, and then you must do lots and lots and lots and lots of very hard work. Most people who set out to make that climb never make it to the top; they content themselves with smaller achievements, when they realize they're happy with those smaller achievements... or that the cost for greater ones is too great for them.

If you make a woman laugh, she’s guaranteed to sleep with you… NOT! Lolz, but seriously, you can definitely spark attraction if you know how to be funny.

A few years ago, I wrote a novel that has become a bit of a cult classic.

Most people (especially women) say they read it in one sitting and are unable to put the book down because it’s so hilarious. I also wrote a comedic, pornographic satire called Kuntar The Barbarian. I consider myself a bit of an expert at humor.

Don’t believe me? Pull my finger, bitch.

So many guys have no clue how to make a girl laugh. Are some men just born funny, or is it something you can cultivate? Both, just like any skill.

Now, before we get too far, I want to make it clear that laughter is not all you need to attract women. Humor is a solid tool in the seduction arsenal, because everyone loves to laugh. It’s definitely attractive. But if that’s all you do, you won’t be so great at sparking the kind of attraction that gets you laid. In fact, humor can sometimes work against you. The guys who seem to get laid by being hilarious are doing other things that aren’t so easy to see.

That said, humor is a super valuable social skill, and a great seduction tool if used right. So let’s learn how to be funny.

The myth of only one The One out there for you comes from hormones and Hollywood. The truth is, there is more than one soul mate for you.

In my article on how women express interest, Bruhaha asked:

"Hey Chase, of recent I was in a heated debate with a religious friend of mine. He holds the view that there is only one girl for every guy in this world and vice versa. I argued that if that were the case, then every widower that remarries is doing a great injustice to the rest of his fellows. This is b'se he would be encroaching on other people's ones. And that the church should actually publicly denounce the holding of such ceremonies in order to be considerate to the rest of the population so that they can have a perfect shot at their ones also. That's when it struck me that you have never actually covered this issue before. I hope sometime to come, when you feel like it, it would really be cool to have your perspective on this issue. I would suggest you entitle it "Debunking the myth of the One", if you don't mind of course. Carpet diem!"

And he's right, I haven't addressed it on here, at least not in article form. I've discussed it a bit in comments over the years... but no standalone article on the subject.

So let's get one up.

Three things we should talk about with 'soul mates' and 'The One':

1. Are there people you match better with than others?
2. Is there only one truly perfect match?
3. Are soul mates drawn toward each other?

All are interesting questions. We'll explore all today.

Do you get WAY more rejections than dates? Well, it’s the same for even the best seducers. Here’s how treating rejection differently can help.

Violets are blue, roses are red, without many options, seduction is dead.

I’m a true poet.

How familiar is this day-game situation? You approach a girl, give her a compliment, talk for a few minutes, get her number, text a few times, ask her out, and… nothing. She just answers “lol”, changes the subject, or flitters away like a pretty ghost.

It feels like a diss, doesn’t it? After all, you had the guts to approach her. You spent months, perhaps years, learning how to do this – to overcome your shyness, your approach anxiety. To improve everything from your appearance and body language to your worldview and lifestyle!

And she doesn’t care. Not one bit. She didn’t even ask you a single question about yourself. How dare she. You spent thousands of dollars on self-help, seminars, books, and online courses. You learned to meditate, increase your income, and build world-class social skills.

And she flakes. It’s like you’ve reverted to a San Francisco street turd.

Just last week, I went to a gay pride parade and met this lovely creature. Long, black hair down to her bum. Wide, full lips. Big, expressive eyes. I reached out my hand and she placed hers in it. I pulled her in and said, “You’re something, aren’t you?”

“Yes,” she nodded, her body pressed against mine, eyes staring straight into mine. A minute of conversation, and we kissed. Approaches don’t get much better than this.

It was “you had me at hello” game.

We were going on separate paths, so I got her number. I got home, still a bit giddy from that post-flirtation high. That evening, I texted her. Nine hours later, she replied with “Haha.” The lowest investment reply possible. So, I waited eight hours and texted her again. No reply. No “Sorry I’m not interested” or “Maybe another time.” Just annoying silence.

And I still haven’t heard from her.

“But Tony, you’re supposed to be a Grand Master Jedi Puuaah! No girls flake on real Pooooass!”

Yeah, girls flake on me, ignore me, diss me – just like you and every guru, coach, and player I know. No matter how tight your game is, most women just won’t be interested or available. They might humor you or amuse themselves at your expense, but they won’t go home with you or ever see you again. That’s just the cold reality of the game. Sniff.

But there’s some girl out there who’s down. She’s very down. It’s your job to find her. That’s why numbers matter. The more leads you have, the better your odds.