The Girlfriend Pickup Dip | Girls Chase

The Girlfriend Pickup Dip

Chase Amante

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girlfriend pickup dipIf you're exclusively a monogamous sort of guy, this article won't apply to you at all.

However, if you ever find yourself in situations where you have one or more women you see regularly for sex, yet you're still on the dating scene, looking for new girls to pair up with, you will encounter this.

It's a phenomenon we might call The Girlfriend Pickup Dip.

The Dip looks like this: once you have a woman or two to tend to your sexual needs regularly, your motivation to seek new sex partners begins to dry up.

You grow less driven to secure new girls. Your tolerance for dating-related difficulties (like women flaking, testing you, or sending you mixed signals) erodes.

You may still go out, but the hunger isn't there. It's harder to get higher caliber women, too, despite everything you've been told: that high caliber women like guys who aren't needy, that women want men other women want, that women can 'smell' success... despite these things, when your drive isn't there, women can sense it, and that's the biggest thing. Because high caliber women want men who value them highly, and are willing to put a minimum level of investment in to get them.

Thus, as an almost inevitable consequence, as you bring more women into your life, and 'fill your pipeline' or 'fill up your rotation', you reach a point where your motivation to keep adding new women falls, and you are less-good at getting the really top notch girls you got at your hungriest, as well as just doing the same volume of new girls in general.

This is The Dip, and if you like multiple women in your life, it can be a thorn in your side.

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his One Date System.



wonka's picture

weird! before reading this article i decided to block this girl that i dated and had sex for a month now... because during this month i didnt talk much with other girls or tried to approach because i didnt had the need 2. she was hot but not my type and we didnt have much in common but she was insisting to start a serious relationship lately so thats why i dumped her

Chase Amante's picture

Probably a good move, wonka!

Amazing how much even a girl you're only moderately happy with can drain your motivation to meet more women, huh? :)


Neal's picture

Hey Chase, I'm from Chicago, and recently on the news in Chicago is a employee working at a restaurant spat on Eric Trump and she was arrested for it. If you look at Eric Trump on Wikipedia, you may know he's married and such. Similarly, many of these Chicago bangers that are Hispanic and big time gunners and murderers, all have women, too, as well as multiple baby mamas. But why is it they only get women of their own race. So for women that are already attracted to ass holes of their race, why can't they be into ass holes of other races, is my question or wondering about. I guess that means ass-holeness is racially-subjective.

Chase Amante's picture


Well, think of it like this.

You're a gal. You decide you want to date Latino or African gang bangers. You could date some nice guy working at Wal-Mart who doesn't have to live in public assistance housing, but nope. The dude who puts holes in people, beats his woman, and is in and out of jail, where he's both spent time being a bitch and probably also making other men his bitches, is the man for you.

What are you looking for?

Basically, the dirtiest, nastiest, most savage guy available.

I think you are either white or Asian or mixed white/Asian if I remember right. Something like that. What are whites and Asians to a girl who wants to date brown gang bangers? White and Asians are boring, lame, and stiff. They don't live by their instincts, like a brown gang banger does. They don't do whatever strikes them in the moment it strikes them. They are logical, they think about things, and they have done weird things like read books and stayed in school past 9th grade. Which only lame cracka-ass losers do.

If what you want is to date the most savage, badass, instinctual beings out there, why would you want to date some lame crack-ass nerdy pale-skin?

You wouldn't. The very thought would make you go "Ew!"

You, in particular, are more analytical than 99% of white and Asian men out there. You are the complete opposite of what any of these women want. They want a man who lives by his instincts, who is primitive and savage, who feels his way through life.

You're barking up the wrong tree, homie... let me tell you that. Like trying to convince a girl who loves to swim all day why she should come and live with you in the desert. Or the girl who loves $10K rings and $20K necklaces and weekends in Dubai why she ought to come live with you in your minimalist shipping crate cabin out in the boondocks with no Internet or cell phone reception.


Xander's picture

Hello Chase,

Thnk you for this great article. I also sometimes have dips for meeting new women, mostly due to lost motivation caused by some things in secuction that I as a beginner or intermediate player still do not understand very well. I think that as always you can advice me what to do.

Thi first thing that cause my motivation dip is that I always got categorized by girls as provider and rarely as lover. You know how it further goes and how story ends. One of the problems is in my lifestyle that is mostly peacefull without big adventures, higher social value than average man (that can not be hidden in small places) and sometimes shy behaviour. I work on improving my fundamentals, and try to produce sexy vibe but sometimes it is not enough and I look in their eyes as incongruent. Is there easier way to get into lover category and what things should be improved first? I know article about date compresion. What else you can recommend me?

The second thing is I was in some weard situations. Two or three times I met women with very high caliber, handsome, smart, educated, with great cariers but later I discovered that they are typical party girls, drunk every friday night. In front of me they act as nice girls, move slow, want relationships without fast or any sex, etc. Tell me please what is the best way to game this sort of women? Will ordinary tactics work? I know one guy which techniques in these situations is to be their short time boyfriend until get sex. This is not problem for me but than I get in sutuations where she is in position above me and have to invest my time and money while she has more options. How much female social success is linked with their "type"? Are more successfull girls more "traditional" than less succcssfull girls?

The third thing that cause my motivation dip is that women never want to dance with me. Never. I am even good looking, not agressive too much, dance average, but when it comes to dancing they threat me on the way like I do not know to dance and it is the most disgusting thing to dance with me. How much dancing is important for seduction?

All the best,


Chase Amante's picture


It sounds like you're trying to change the impression people have of you in a small town. That's tough... it's not something I've undertaken, personally. Haven't heard a lot of success stories about this either. The general theme seems to be once people think they know who you are, it's who you are. You can go on a journey of self-discovery and become a completely different man... to those hometown people, you're still "Good Provider Xander, same good guy he always was."

If I was you, rather than try to break the stereotype, I'd leverage it. Just start screening girls hard. "Hmm, I don't know about you..." "Not sure if you make the cut..." "You're cute and all, but gee, I dunno..." Being the provider puts you in the screening role. A woman who wants you as a provider wants you to give her stuff; that lets you decide if she's someone you're willing to give stuff to, or not. Find ways to drop this in with women you like "You're great, Shari. I really like how sharp you are, and how nice. If you wore skirts more often, you'd be perfect." If Shari starts wearing skirts, you're up and running.

Yes, all the same stuff works on professionaly successful party girls. You may want to check out these articles if you haven't yet:

... but there aren't a lot of differences.

I know it's annoying being slow-gamed by women you know are out getting drunk, making out with guys, and occasionally ONS'ing them. A lot of how women are with you in dating resolves to the context they met you in and the impression you made on them.

Even if you're the perfect husband, if a woman met you on vacation in a hook-up resort, and you were surfing and partying with a group of hot, slutty people, she is going to either want to hook up with you fast and then ditch you, or not hook up with you at all. Maybe she's never even hooked up with a guy quick before, and if she met you at work she'd marry you. But in that context, all the social signals around you say "This guy is a wild one-time fuck -- and that's it!" and she is going to listen to those signals and treat you as a one-time lay.

And it works the other way if she meets you in some non-party setting and you come across like a guy who might make a great boyfriend. As soon as you go into the boyfriend box, you're getting slow gamed. Just how it goes. Either find a way to stay out of the boyfriend box, or figure out your game plan for shagging girls while in it.

How much female social success is linked with their "type"? Are more successfull girls more "traditional" than less succcssfull girls?

More professionally and socially successful women tend to be a bit more conservative on average, though it's a fairly weak link, especially for singles. The biggest difference in their traditionalism is once they're married. While single, you will have a higher mix of more reserved women among the socially/professional successful classes, but you will still have plenty of wild party girls mixed in too. You will still have some women who went professional in part because they're high testosterone and like competitive male industries and also fully avail themselves of all the high status males in their proximity there.

The third thing that cause my motivation dip is that women never want to dance with me. Never. I am even good looking, not agressive too much, dance average, but when it comes to dancing they threat me on the way like I do not know to dance and it is the most disgusting thing to dance with me. How much dancing is important for seduction?

Not important.

I struggled with the same thing early on in my seduction career. Eventually I realized there was a certain strategy to dancing, and that I did not know what it was.

Rather than choose to learn it, I chose to focus on what I'm better at: just meeting girls once they drift off the dance floor.


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