Tactics Tuesdays: Realigning a Girlfriend's Beliefs | Girls Chase

Tactics Tuesdays: Realigning a Girlfriend's Beliefs

Chase Amante

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realigning a girlfriend's beliefs
How do you change a girlfriend’s beliefs, and bring them inline with yours? By shifting her personal Overton window – to alter her ideological environment.

Commenting under a prior Tactics Tuesdays article on dismissing ideological fights you want no part of, Kaelos asked:

How about in a long-term relationship with a woman, where you share similar beliefs/views but there are some mild to moderate differences on topics like feminism, frugality vs spending, child-rearing practices, small differences in religious beliefs, etc.

Is there a strategy to implement so that her beliefs/views more closely match your own well-researched beliefs/views over the long term?

We’ve talked about behavior modification on Girls Chase plenty.

What about belief modification?

Well, yes. You can absolutely change someone’s beliefs... to an extent.

To do that, first, we’re going to focus on shifting a woman’s own personal Overton window.

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his One Date System.



Danny's picture

Wow Chase, This was an amazing article, you shifted my overton window with this article too. This was helpful for understanding how to affect other people's beliefs, so I was wondering if you could write an article sometime about developing and finding your own values, wants, desires, and figuring out what you stand for in order to have a strong sense of self. Women are definitely attracted to a man who has these things and she can follow the lead of his values and what he stands for. I feel like this can create a strong frame in of itself. I find myself in the problem of not knowing these about myself and falling into chameleon relationships with friends or girlfriend where I adopt some of their values instead of having a strong unshakable versions of myself. Any advice or an article would be highly appreciated. Thank you!

Anonym's picture

Hi Chase,

thanks for an interesting article. I have two points here:

1) You wrote "Yes, powerful men all have multiple women. All of them."

Of course many powerful men do it. But how can you be sure that all of them do it? The only way to prove it is to have detailed knowledge of life of all of them, which is impossible. But can you tell that this applies also on men powerful in their field like Nikola Tesla, Lionel Messi, Bill Gates, Adolf Hitler or the Pope? Some of them decided not to pursue women because of their work (Tesla), are shy/awkward/introverts and live monogamous life (Messi, Gates), have repressed sexuality (Hitler, also probably Cecile Rhodes), or religious reasons (the Pope).

2) Your Overton window is a great way, how to explain, what is essence of "political correctness". Many people in the West make mistake with seeing "political correctness" as equal to social liberal/progressive views. In reality, this phenomena is universal in all societies since each of them has consensus on some values which implies what is acceptable and what not (or for social groups, which may have different values from the mainstream consensus in their country, so for them is "politically correct" something else) and its concrete content is contextual. There might be next to anti-racist or anti-sexist also anti-Communist, religious, nationalist or other political correctness. Often those critics who make political correctness equal to social liberalism are politically correct in a different way (and use labeling of opponents, black and white view, oversimplifying, denying uncomfortable facts etc.), while not realizing it. It is interesting to watch it. I see your way of thinking compatible with what I wrote here, though sometimes when I read GC it looks like this mistake is reproduced also here - however, it may happen because you write mostly on relations between men and women and mostly for Western public which makes Western feminism/social liberalism more common topic.



Lawliet's picture

Hey Chase,

Thank you for this article!
I like the idea of realigning, convincing her to take a new perspective.
Not to mention attraction booster.

Though what if she's very strong in her standpoint?
Speaking of, you prefer girls who are strong minded and won't easily be convinced unless it's a strong argument.
But then are we going into arguments with gfs? I heard those are rather the opposite of attraction.

It feels like a fine line of realign vs. huge argument over opinions held strongly = adversarial almost

Re: Attraction boosters

Speaking of attraction booster, sure realigning beliefs and getting her to see your perspective is great, but any other boosters (not passive like fundamentals) in interactions?

Little details or so to sprinkle that will give us some attraction boosts, helps with emotional cresting too by knowing what these are exactly.

Re: Missing piece of the puzzle
Realigning... Is this the missing piece for running the MLTR setup ;)
Yeah, dealing with their drama is important and also setting the expectations without "in your face".
But changing their perspective altogether and make an exception just for you...
Now that's powerful.

Chase, you're teasing me with this...

Re: Restaurants
I'm curious if you had situations where you're out to dine or lunch and a girl at another table is cute, but she's with someone, and so are you.

How would you hit her up?

2 scenarios:
1) You're not sure if she likes you. No apparent approach invitation, would you just walk beeline while she has other friends present? and would you sit down or stand there while everyone is seated?

2) You see her looking your way. So chances are she likes you, but she still needs to engage her friend at the table. (Note, this isn't a nightclub), how would your approach be here? don't forget you also have friends at the table.

3) Lastly, what if that friend of hers is much older than her, making it possible for it to be her mom.
Approaching in front of her mom... hmm

Would love to hear your thoughts Chase.


Dale's picture

A few years ago I went to a bar, and there were two waitresses who were clearly mom and daughter. Mom arranged for the daughter to wait my table and was hoping for something to develop. (Make sure when you go to a bar, that you don't have to call it a night hours before closing).

SZ's picture

Lately Chase, I've been so paranoid of dating. I just stay home all of the time. I want to still accomplish my goals, but it's just too much going on that it makes me just want to be a recluse. 

Had a couple of questions.


1. How paranoid should black men be of dating ? What can we do to be safe?

2. With online dating and college. How can we be careful with that ? What would we be doing differently now? 

3. Could you tell me what you mean about moving slow with college women ? What would that entail ? How could I still sleep with many girls in college, but still move fast enough while moving slow enough ? 

4. Are we now stepping away from what was recommended on here for moving fast or is that with college women ?

5. You think I should avoid certain age groups and races in college ? I want to fuck as much as I can, but want to be safe as possible.

6. With one night stands, are we to avoid these now? I know you said that's what bars and clubs are for, is it different now ? And also can't girls just lie and say they were drunk if they wanted to? And would we go over to girls house for a one night stand from a bar or club ?

7. You think it would be safer going to women's houses instead? How would we pull it off for every single date? I would rather go to a girl's house, but I'm also paranoid because it's not my spot. But let me know if you think this should be my new method of sleeping with women.

8. Was just curious if all advice can be taken the same way? I feel minorities, especially black men need the most advice about staying safe while dating because of how stuff is. If you have any advice on anything else black men can do please let me know. 


SZ's picture



Had a couple questions based on your last response.


1. What is the definition of somewhat cute?  I remember you said to lower your standards to level up, I'm guessing somewhat cute is the lowest we can go attraction wise to be safe? I'm all for it, but want to make sure that I'm not making things too hard on myself with seduction.

I also notice that online girls aren't that attractive.

So having something to go by on how I can tell if a girl is somewhat cute would help a lot.

Would weight matter too?

2. Making women feel warm and fuzzy after sex: does that make a girl have expectations for us and put us in the potential boyfriend zone or make her like us a lot and she'll be hard to get rid of?

I know it's good to treat women good, but if we are nice and fuzzy does that make them like us more and would that make it harder to leave them ? And wouldn't they be angry if we treated them so good and left them ?

Curious on how we can still treat them good and move on to the next.

3. How should I go about with sleeping with many girls in college? I know I have to be low-key but I want to sleep with a lot. How should How should I move to make this easy for me reputation wise so I can avoid drama?

4. With my hotel question I meant what if I didn't have a hotel and wanted to pull a girl to a hotel after not having one already?

She would be with me paying for it and I feel she would feel that I'm thinking sex and would mess up the seduction. 

What should I do in that situation?

5. How do you ignore constant bad thoughts?




SZ's picture

Had a couple questions Chase,

1. Do you still approach and sleep with a lot of women? I'm sure you're not doing it as much, but I know you've been pretty busy and I wondered how much have you calmed down with sleeping with different women. I was just thinking about how you work so many hours so many days, how do you even find time to sleep with new women and date them?

2. Chase I remember reading an article or maybe it was a comment where I think you said most of the people you know that sleep with a lot of women have some skin stds u can't cure.

Not talking about the big bad one, but the skin one. I don't want to write the names of them, but I'm sure you'll know what I'm talking about.

It just made me paranoid and wondered, what does one do if they get one of the skin stds?

I know one goes away, one I heard goes away and they have a shot for it, and the last one comes and goes forever.

So what are seducers supposed to do if they get one of these skin stds?

Is it over for them ? Can they not date anymore ?

I know you said you could use divine 9 lube to protect yourself against them, but what if you happen to trust a girl have raw sex with her and she gives you one of the skin stds? What if you kiss the wrong girl and now you have the std that comes and goes forever?

What is one supposed to do if they catch it?

Telling multiple girls isn't an option. You're reputation would be ruined and you think multiple women will sleep with you if they hear this ?

So what would one do ? Just quit the game and become depressed? Or what ? Just curious.

How does one not end up paranoid about catching one of these skin stds? And still have fun sleeping around?

Are there signs to look for to protect ourselves ?

3. Quick question about when u were dating when you were unemployed. You might have been unemployed, but you had a career and you could go back to it if need be. I know you say this sometimes to let us know you don't need a high paying job to get women, but I get kind of confused because in your article about dating younger women, you said as an older man you need to have a career and money. So was that advice just for younger men?

4. What about the men who are going through tough times of being broke despite trying to do the right thing, but have no career? How do those men who didn't have the employed success you had and never had a career be able to date many women ?


Anonymous 's picture

Hi Chase,

Im at Uni and I wanted to ask you a couple things.

1. How would you approach girls on campus if you wanted to sleep with a lot of them? Would approach the ones walking on campus? Would you use a street stop direct approach for that? If I was to approach many girls from college and want to sleep with a lot of them, would that be the way to go about it? I don't want to join a frat either. I'm a little older as well of that matters. I would also like to know how I could make friends too if I don't join a frat.

2. With these girls at college do I do only hang out dates? How should I go about it?

3. With all girls, how do I set up logistics to go to their place at the end of the date? I probably won't know where to go by where they live. I want to do this for all of my dates.

4. What is the end goal with women? I honestly never want to commit. I remember reading you said men who have slept with a lot of women don't commit, so how do they keep marriages in tact while cheating and the woman be faithful? What do you see for yourself? Do you see marriage? Or are you going to just have kids? 



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