If you've read the post on auto-rejection, then you know a big problem facing most guys in the Western world isn't that they come on too strong... but that they don't come on strong enough, and women end up assuming they just aren't all that into them... which leads women to then auto-reject, close up, and go cold to protect their own emotions. And if that's happening to you, that's probably because you're like most guys in the West these days, and you don't yet have too firm a grasp on how to let a girl know you like her.
What is it, exactly, with this plague of tentative men these days? It seems like the average guy nowadays is so afraid of rejection that he isn't willing to stick his neck out at all - or else he goes into things with the "just friends" angle, then get surprised and upset when they end up in the friend zone.
No - as you get to know a girl, it's important that you also know how to let a girl know you like her - and that you go about doing exactly that.
Comments
Long Time No See
Hi Chase long time reader first time commenter.
So recently I started very minimal contact with a girl I used to be interested in high school. I'm in college now and shes about to graduate High School. Basically, I am not completely sure how to increase our contact or get her out to put some of your strategies to work.
I debated hinting that I like her and want to go out, but game is a little bit different when you cannot actually see the person in person. So any suggestions? I don't even have her phone number yet just facebook friends with extremely minimal conversation.
Would hinting at my interest in her be to direct at this point? We were really just friends in class and never had any contact outside of it if that means anything. I never did make a move during high school I wasn't as confident then as I am now.
Thanks,
Greg
i think you could try talking
i think you could try talking to the people who go to the high school she goes to and hang out with them. you can have them try to hang out with her after school and you could tag along. once your all together than you can make your move. get her number and than you can ask her out
Hey chase. I think your a mad
Hey chase. I think your a mad scientist. I'm actually kinda amazed. Anyways here's my issue, I'm 27 had a kid with my now ex when I was 23. We were together for 6 years until Jan this year. At which that point I went to Canada for a month and she began seeing a guy in LA, we live in nor cal. I got home she wouldn't let me in, or see my son. Long story short as I can make it. Went thru court all winter, completely bankrupted my self on attorneys 2 get my son back. We became mortal enemies. I start reading our stuff on here 2 apply 2 other women, and just as an experiment also on my ex. Who was prob the last woman on earth that would want 2 sleep with me. But using some posture/body language proper eye contact and law of least effort, I ended up sleeping with her last night. Very awkward seeing as there's 1 more final court date for her Ina few days for slapping me and I charged her with assault. And she's still seeing this guy in LA. I guess my big question is how do I interact with her now when I see her. I'm still unwisely kinda in love with her, but know I can't be warm to her after all she's put me thru. And it's been tough getting dates with new girls with having a four year old I now take care of as a single dad. Any advice from you would be deeply appreciated. Thanks 4 providing real advice to men unpolegetcally bro.
balnincing out being a challenge vs showing interest
first time reading your blog and Ive been disinterring post after post, amazing material, something that makes a lot more intuitive sense than old "game" theory with a complicated Hodge podge of social rules
my questions is this
how do you show interest and yet retain the idea that you're a challenge, but you'll help her meet the challenge?
and why is this so very important?
here's what I'm talking about (an excerpt from your posthttp://www.girlschase.com/content/conversation-example
Him: You can be my Bond girl.
Her: Totally.
Him: Too bad the Bond girl is different in every movie. I kind of like you.
Her: [laughs]
Him: Maybe I'll lobby the writers to keep you around for two movies. Like, a sequel or something.
Her: [laughs]
They're bonding here. He uses roleplay to imply that he's a little hard to get but still working to help her get with him. See that? He's hard for her to get, but he's on her side and he's trying to help her be with him despite how hard a guy he is to get. If he's too hard to get, she'll close up and go cold. If he's trying to help her get him but he's not hard to get, she'll think he's too easy and get bored. If, however, he's hard to get, and gunning for her and trying to help her succeed… well… now she's intrigued.
SOS Need To Know ;)
Hi Chase
I think your great,but I need help with a dilemma
I like this girl but she is super popular
She normally is VERY freindly and always says hi in the corridor
She is in another class though and we never talk much
Here's the tricky bit were both 11 years old but she has had many boyfriends
one of which is my close friend
A little too young for this I
A little too young for this I guess. I think it's best that you talk to your friend first. You might lose your close friend without even getting that girl your both like.
Hello Chase, I read a few of
Hello Chase,
I read a few of your blogs and a lot of the things you talk about come naturally to me with girls I'm physically attracted to, but I seem to lose all my skills when it comes to girls I have genuine feelings for. Any ideas? Much thanks.
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